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~
I.
Killing Mary Poppins
with a spoonful of sugar,
the sugar from the medicine
on the other side of town,
the town called Silent Hedges
And A Bit Of Fluff.


II.
Only a display model,
her name is Marmalade;
skin white like the moon,
she wears her ****** stranger dress;
one of her sisters is dying,
the other never lived;
God is a far off concept,
the fuchsia colored ball on
an overhead power grid
points her way to salvation.


III.
Morning became something else:
bright decline,
cold things start to burn,
tragic saxophone
among the beckoning,
everything's a symptom:
tax exiles, imperialists,
girls talking nitrous
--mouths full of soil,
Virginia Reel around the fountain
(do-si-do),
ready to buy up impossibles
as the dominoes fall.


IV.
Memory is a chemical
to the girl who cried champagne,
like ceiling stars
during the prodigal summer,
she played the game
on all fours,
and found a drawer
full of quarantine polaroids,
some with blood in her mouth,
others, of rain on her birthday.

~
I thought you cared for me
Because, your words had always conveyed that to me
I was supposed to be your best friend
However, our relationship, you decided to end
You said you were my sister
But you left me feeling rather bitter
Because you cared only about yourself
And left me hating myself
For something as minor as a Facebook comment
Never did you have any good intent!

I thought you cared for me
But it was never "we"
It was all "you"
Our friendship had no value
Because you were obsessed about yourself
You and your anaconda sized ego
Which you could never let go
You and your precious Mumbai Indians
Were the only **** sapiens
Who truly mattered to you
Apart from your "bestest friend"
You, would he blindly defend
As though you were a Nobel Prize winner
While you were actually a sore loser
With an extremely domineering personality
Masked by a deceptively sweet tongue

I thought you cared for me
But you never let me be
Because, all that mattered, was your precious image
Often, would you take umbrage
Over relatively insignificant matters
Such as me not marking you present
When you were LITERALLY absent
No wonder, did you have your haters
Because, YOU came before everyone else
Never did you take a pause
And empathise with anyone
In fact, YOU were everyone!!

I thought you cared for me
But you never truly cared for anyone
You thought you were a special someone
Who deserved all the attention in the world
On the other hand, often did you fold
At the slightest hint of pressure
Though you were so sure
That you were always right
Oh boy, never were you a pretty sight!!

I thought you cared for me
But you never took the trouble to understand me
You called me your best friend
But I was nothing more than a means to an end
Because you were a narcissist
And as a friend, one of the worst
Seriously, accepting your offer of friendship
Was nothing short of a mishap!!
Anyway, you will get what's coming to you
Your friends will eventually leave you
And then it will be just YOU
Left to fend for yourself
As you deserve to be
Because you are so obsessed with yourself
However, the world is for all
It's time you learned that
Once and for all!!
Poem dedicated to a narcissistic former friend of mine from my engineering days.
B 1d
How lovely you look, so lit up.
I always keep my room
glowing like a subtle dream
sunset; orange, lavender, vibrant peach.
Now you're mine in the midnight hour
overcome by it, for a week.
Hoping you'll notice
the lonely pothos leaves
she's survived so much
we have both survived living with me.
I never liked this town
but you are so beloved
brought you here
now we're so above it.
Sipping on french champagne
(forgot to budget)
no worries, I'll be gone
this time next year
in some strange place with the curtain drawn
thinking of us here.
At random hours of the night
I'll send you a joke
Because I wake up from nightmares
Where you've been ripped from my life

I'm trapped inside a house with spiders
Surrounded by canary-colored walls
I'm afraid of Virginia Woolf
and all the words she ever wrote
I don't want to feel such things anymore

You call me up
But don't say a thing
Should I say something?
What's there to say?
Would it change your mind?
Would it make a difference?

I'm too old to pretend
On the midnight train
I'm too old to believe
I know we won't make it to the end of the line

When I say, when I say, when I say...
My whispers could never be louder than all the politics (Suicidal thoughts)
I'm met with silence
What you mean, what you mean, what you mean
Will always be..." Goodbye"

What do I know?
I'm afraid of Virginia Woolf
What was I thinking?
and all the words she ever wrote

At random hours of the night
I'll send you a joke
Because I wake up from nightmares
Where you've been ripped from my life
Ashwin Kumar Feb 25
You are a good friend of mine
If I am ever stuck in a mire
You are someone whom I can count on
Never will you pull a con
A wonderful colleague you were
For me, were you always there!

You are a good friend of mine
Those days, do I dearly miss
When we used to meet almost everyday
Swap tales over a piping hot cup of cutting chai
Share our respective work issues
Including the routine salary delay excuse
And the antics of our clients
For which, were we forced to bear the brunt
Have lunch together at the cafeteria
The perfect panacea
For all our work troubles
Which often came in doubles and triples
And last but not the least
Walk to the station together after work
Well, our being colleagues certainly came with a lot of perks!!

You are a good friend of mine
By nature, are you very kind
And have supported me always
Thanks to you, do I possess some sort of patience
Whenever things don't go my way
Friends, will we forever stay
And though we don't meet often
We do speak over the phone frequently
And these calls are usually lengthy
But yes, we should indeed meet soon
For me, is your company always a boon
I repeat, you are a good friend of mine
And If I ever feel alone
I know that I just need to give you a ring
Because you are a fantastic human being!!
Poem dedicated to Rishi, a good friend and former colleague of mine.
Looking up at me with dandelion glass baubles for eyes,
Say, "What about tomorrow?"
I shake my head down at you from my magnificent children's playset
My neck cracks when I **** it to the side
I whisper in singsong,
"I think we should stop."
How do you let someone down easy without letting them down so hard?
Ashwin Kumar Feb 20
You are a gem of a friend
Whom it is very difficult to offend
I knew you as a colleague first
Your trustworthiness, is something to which I can completely attest
To work with, were you always fun
Because your mind was always open

You are a gem of a friend
Nothing gets past your clever mind
Not to mention, are you sweet as honey
Talking with you, is something I always enjoy
What I like about you the most
Is the fact, that when it cometh to speaking one's mind
You are undoubtedly one of the best
Because you always stand your ground
No matter what happens
Your courage is indeed immense

You are a gem of a friend
With whom it is not difficult to bond
Usually, no fan am I, of political discussions
However, for you can I make an exception
Imagine the fun we could have
Trashing the central government
I can already imagine your excitement
After all, you never shy away from a debate
A mere spark is enough
For your mind to ignite
Though your voice is the exact opposite of gruff!

You are a gem of a friend
To the world, are you a godsend
How do you manage your kids
Run the house
And work at the same time
Is something for which, an answer one cannot frame!!
Well, I do hope you take a pause
From time to time
Because you are indeed a hard worker
A great conversationalist and listener
And above all, a friend to remember!!
Yes, you are indeed a gem of a friend
With this, shall my poem end!!
Dedicated to Irene, my friend and former colleague.
I think of men much like I think of dogs

I'm initially weary of all the strange ones
I keep my distance and speak softly in case they might bite

After I meet them a few times and they're consistently friendly I'll let my guard down a little

Even then though they will still sometimes bite even if you think you know them

I've encountered enough biting dogs that I'm starting to fear dogs as a species

Which, as it turns out, dogs can sense and they don't like

I don't want to dislike dogs.
I've loved plenty of very good dogs in my life.

There are many dogs that I'm excited to see when they approach me
That I'll give treats and belly rubs to

But people that don't know me well think that I don't like dogs

When they see me interact with them on our first meeting they think I'm mean and crass

But in reality I'm just afraid and trying my best not to show it because they'll sense that fear in me

And chase me back to my truck
Or bite me
Or snarl and snap at the air to watch me dance for them

One mean biting dog will make you wary of dogs for a short time
But then you forget

It's only after many biting dogs
Many scary dogs
That it starts to wear on you
That you get nervous of all of them

But you tell someone their dog bites and they don't believe you

They say its never done that before
They ask you what you were doing when it bit you

They tell you that you should've have been in their yard
Like they didn't invite you there

So it's not that I don't like dogs
It's that dogs don't always like me

And they're one of the greatest dangers that I face on a daily basis

I'm a dog person
I'm also just an animal that runs on instinct
Ashwin Kumar Feb 11
You broke my heart
And threw it in a pile of dirt
I have no enemies
However, worse are you, than an enemy
Because, betrayal leaves scars
Which are even bigger than cars
And take as much time to heal
As it does, to complete a CA course
Which is of course, a huge deal!

You broke my heart
And caused me a lot of hurt
Truly did I care for you, you know
Thus, was it a massive blow
When we came to know the truth
Which destroyed the earth
On which my love was built
Since, loyal was I, to a fault

You broke my heart
And turned it into a shopping cart
You took advantage of my compassion
And used it as ammunition
For your deceitful modus operandi
However, thanks to the rescue operations
Led by my best friend and my sister
We put an end to the matter
However, rather protracted and tedious
Was the divorce process
And ultimately richer did you get, by a frigging four lakhs
For absolutely no fault of ours!!

You broke my heart
And ensured I nearly fell apart
However, healing am I
Slowly but surely
Thanks to my dear family
As well as my circle of friends
Not to mention, a few close cousins
All of whom ensure, I suffer not, for your sins
Our relationship may have had a bitter end
However, I am now free
And no longer, will I carry
The burden of a relationship
Which, in hindsight, was always going to be doomed
Even without all the cheating and manipulation
Of course, I may have to apply some caution
When it cometh to future relationships
However, I now understand the value of friendship
Better than ever!!

You broke my heart
However, I am making a conscious effort
To put all this behind
With the help of family, cousins and friends
As well as therapy
Of course, not always am I happy
But I am healing for sure
This experience having ensured
That I am working harder than ever
And allowing myself to be bored, never

I repeat, you broke my heart
However, you have made me more alert
I am now stronger than ever
And will allow myself to be cheated, never
What you did proved to be a blessing in disguise
Because, it has made me wise
And just a matter of time is it
Before my broken heart eventually heals!!
Poem on how I am healing after a painful divorce.
A weight
Crashes on my chest.
Your tears
Burn through my skin.

No escape,
No rest.
As you slumber
Soundly in my bed.

A feeling of emptiness
Swarms my mind.
Your thoughts
Knock heavily into mine.

They sit and wait
Until I break the line.
And fix the knot
That just won't tie.
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