Wilted leaves overpopulate the ground.
And no tree as far as eyes can perceive.
So far from home.
So close to anywhere.  
But here.
A statement that can be heard any second of any given day.
This moment in time.
A random fraction of the incessant routine.
Dreaming or awake.
It all depends on feel.
Not logic.
And even then the rules of both worlds must be learned regardless.
Who is there to say that one's understanding of the environment  is incorrect.
Everything down to the information that the eyes process therefore in the brain.
I think so therefore I am.
And yet even this comes into question regularly.
The longer one stays in this world.
Less and less questions are answered.
But one thing can definitely be found regardless of intention.
One must learn to swim through the viscous muk of disappointment.
To grasp at enlightenment.
Or be insane enough to not care.
For words can never be unseen.
Sharper than any blade.
Even more blunt than a boulder.
Can the wrong words be.
One cant go through life without first being initiated through pain.  
And even after its not promised that happiness will follow.
With so many eyes weighing down in expectation.
Its hard to focus.
On any point.
It may always seem..

AC 7h

It's twelve in the morning,
these thoughts don't have enough space
It screams for a peaceful life
yet craves for endless ideas
I'm not crazy, I am just aware
That people will leave
when they are tired of you
Believe me,
they can and they will.

So many boys cry about this made up space
So many girls use it as an excuse to call a guy fake
Truth be told some people are best off as friends
If you don't see it everyone else does
Time will show you what you are meant to be
Don't hurt yourself about being in this zone
It hurts a ton more not knowing if you are there are not
It takes a toll on your mind and heart
It can tear the strongest person apart
True strength comes to those that accept this zone
Even more for those that love this zone
You will find people that put you in this zone
But your mind will battle your heart
Your heart will scream please catch me
While your mind says please don't lose this person
For one they make your world seem less dark
If you don't find this zone then leave that person playing
With your heart because they don't appreciate your well being
So if you truly care about this person that put you in this zone
Then let it happen and don't push them way
Because it will just makes you weak and bitter
Real men and woman embrace this zone
They understand this is where you can heal
Heal your mind
Heal your heart
Heal your friendship
Heal yourself so you wont miss that next person

Today I finally made it to the friend zone. I honestly can say I couldn't be happier. I feel so free and my mind isn't clutter with doubt or pain. Just happiness and hope for a new start. If anyone is struggling with this type of situation just ask and embrace whatever answer you get, because its not worth having a false sense of hope.
Dakota 13h

a shot glass slammed onto
marble countertops,
shuddering and yet not
breaking like your voice
when you tell him how badly
you wanted to die last night,
how you almost did it
with a beer can you
mangled until you could
slice through skin with
aluminium's sharp edge
but it didn’t work.
another drink is poured
and another shot is slammed
and your confession is hanging
by a noose wrapped around
the kitchen ceiling light.
red scratches, cuts, attempts -
whatever you want to call them -
protrude angrily and yet
he says nothing.
you feel like nothing,
like an empty cloud floating
through a sky you just
don’t feel attached to.
a sky you could drop from
happily at any time.
maybe the aluminum
will work next try.

End of summer came
Our days were now countable
Will you still remember my name?
Or will distance change everything?
Will our lips still meet even though they haven't touched for weeks?
Or will we rather say the words we fail to speak?
Will our souls still connect effortlessly or will that remind us that some things are not meant to be?
Will I still taste a tint of happiness through your kiss or will I taste a mouth full of pain and regret?
God doesn't make mistakes but time will decide our fate

when i love
i throw myself in flames

but i've learnt that
i don't need to

i can save that passion
i can save myself for someone
i choose

i am my own hero.

I miss my friends
The squad goals that never end
Four personalities well meshed
Inspiring artistic trends
And devouring all life has

The white is black
Salinas is back
To life inside this sack
Of flesh and bones fully intact
A beautiful heart where nothing lacks

Colombia is crazy
Pops niggas and makes them hazy
Disrespect her she'll beat you endlessly
But her heart of gold so full of love
Her home a place of rest for me

Gerlt! the artist
Intellectual and passionate
The alien prodigy
Ambitious creator
Bringing art to reality

Jon the weirdo
Forrest sex freako
Fifty shades of foolishness
Open minded to all people
No empathy for you though

Squad Kronicles
Taking on new challenges
Unmasking new ideas
Reaching new levels
Aliens amongst normal peoples

JM 4/29/17

I miss my friends and wanted to write a little something about them

To create a space in time, a bubble in the bath of forever,
I would place you by my side, your hand in mine, fiery yellow sunflowers lining our skies.
A kiss from those sweet lips I would steal, my one final moment to feel whole,
Before reality swallowed me again, spreading shards of my heart like sand on the wind.
No longer am I yours, in his arms I hide, as she holds your heart and gives you all I couldn't provide.
And though I may be moving on, my dear I am not fine.
For I miss the warmth of your smile, and that little place that was mine, as we lay side by side.
But in my fleeting dreams we can dance once more beneath the moon, like we did all those years ago, when I called you mine.

hold me close, hold me tighter, before this land we created falls apart.
i chased you to the mountaintops - where the Sun kisses the snow-covered peaks so delicately.
i chased you to the oceans - where the sand dances precariously with that frothy smile.
every single thing i do, i feel i have something to prove to you.
i gave you my hand - when you asked for a friend.
i gave you my soul - when you asked for a lover.

hold me close, hold me tighter, before these stitches break apart within my heart.
i chased you down the valley - where the rain water lies atop the lush green in a still pool.
i chased you far into the forests - where the trees reach their arms up to the sky, praising that blushing Sun.
every single thing i do, i'm able to because of you.
you gave me a light - when all i saw was darkness.
you gave me a purpose - when all i saw was defeat.

hold me close, hold me tighter, before i wake up.

Saw you in my dream
We were laughing in pure glee
Woke up so happy

The past few months I've had so many dreams about a girl I use to be close with. All of those previous dreams were either very awkward or just sad and depressing because all we put each other through. This was the first one that was just pure happiness and joy. It was just filled with so much life and the feeling of being free.
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