Deeper than these scars within,
Cuts the fear of failing you;
Runs wider than the seas combined,
Tides of time are crashing down,
I cannot stop this drowning man;
Gasps of truth still hurting you,
Sinking now in waves of shame,
I can never find my breath again.
The scars are re-emerging,
Reminding me of the pain with it.
Each little screams and sighs,
They all come back rushing.
Yesterday i was thinking of how,
Strong i have become, i was,
Until i see these scars again.
I breakdown a million times,
Worse in my head than reality.
I can’t pick up these pieces,
Alone even though i have to.
And it feels like i am drowning,
Shouting for help, can you hear,
Please rescue me, will you?
There was a time when I was trapped
On an island none could see
As I waited there on the darkened lands
For someone to find me
Days and days spent gazing out
At the still, empty waters
Never knowing when the day will come
That my life here would falter
I wonder if there would be a day
I would want life less than death
But if I tried jumping into the sea
I know I would hold my breath
Staying here, I am confined
On an island of my own making
Wondering if this day will be my last
But next morning I keep waking
There’s no way off this silent place
No way to end this pain
And I can’t stop my will to live
From continuing to drain
As I gaze upon the shimmering blue
I know no one’s here to save me
And as I watch the days ticking by
I know no one’s here to free me
But now I know as I continue to live
My freedom’s not defined by others
And I cannot keep waiting here
To be freed by another
So now I know never to wait
Until the tank fills to the brim
When no one’s there to witness you drown
You teach yourself to swim
Fight for yourself :)
i always feel like
i can't breathe, you're pulling me
Lungs filled with water, fists pounding on chest
Blue lips frozen in time, a beating heart at rest
There's no sun shining through the clouds.
Eyes filled with horror, mouths unable to speak
Hope starts to wane, no one's able to reach
The worse conclusion to this poem.
When all hope is lost, and the world's hysterical
Sometimes, very rarely, someone sends a miracle
I don't know who, and I don't know why
All I know is that someone's on our side.
A gasp of air, a failing heart beats
Eyes flutter open, we now believe
i've spent 6 months hoping you'd love me at least have as much as I love you
hoping one day you'd call me to say you've loved me all along and it just took you a while to realize I'm the one for you
drowning in a cold lifeless ocean with you thinking of someone else on the warm sandy shore
thinking about you every single day
spent hating you yet loving you so **** much
that I would never wanna take back for anything else, because I know it's gonna be worth it in the end
You can’t control them
Some people are able to show their emotions
Some people prefer to not share them
Emotions are private
Everybody decides who they want to share their emotions with
Emotions are a way to express feelings
Emotions can be rough or sensitive
They sometimes drown you
You decide whether to swim back to the surface or go under
Can you control them?
overwhelmed and breathless
in the way that makes you
tired of existing
until the realization
that i have not been
deep in the ocean
my feet are planted
in the sky
and it's only my head
if i just keep walking
i'll be in the clouds
keep going, love. you can touch the stars.
Feels like I’m losing you. Slowly drifting apart. We don’t have the same vibes anymore. Everything feels different from your kisses to our skin touching. It just doesn't feel right anymore. I don’t know what to do. Do I let you go or do I stay and fight. If I choose to fight, how do I know it will be worth it and I’m not falling into a never ending black hole. Where my heart will feel even more numb than it already does. I need you to show me the effort. Show me that you still want me. Give me the slightest clue that you’re still in love with me. Make me feel the way I did when we were first together. I’m beginning to believe the butterflies have escaped and won’t return. They’ve outgrown this lonely dying heart of mine. I just want to rebuild what's breaking apart. I need you to give me the tools to do that. Lord knows I can’t do this on my own. You’ve begun to slowly but surely silence me. I’m starting to believe my words mean nothing to you. I could scream until my lungs exploded and you still wouldn’t hear me. It’s funny how you can think everythings just fine when I’m barely breathing. How you can go about everyday laughing and smiling while I’m in pain. The thing is you can’t even realize that. Or maybe you do and just won’t accept it. You just couldn’t handle the pain of me leaving so you keep me around in hopes that I’ll come around. Unfortunately I can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, only darkness and sorrow. You’re not the only one to blame, I’ve had plenty of opportunities to walk away. Yet I was too scared of being alone again and starting over. I was dumb. At this point I don’t know if I could even feel anymore. What more could you possibly have to hurt me with. I have no pride anymore. I swallowed that a long time ago. So tell me what’s next in the endless circle of what you call “love”. I honestly don’t know if you even know you’re doing this to me. You’ve dealt with your own pain, but I'm not making excuses for how you treat me. I’ve never caused you pain nor would I ever think about it. That’s the thing my heart is too good for most. Even for myself. No matter what gets done to me my heart still won’t change. That’s the saddest thing. It’s like i'm killing myself and can’t stop. When will I stop drowning myself.