luxe 1d
Like a dark night sky,
Filled with glimmers of light,
Burdened with empty spaces between.

Or an ocean coast,
Tempted to meet the land,
Crashing cautiously.

A bee that floats in the summer air,
Dying from a danger,
That was never really there.

A shaking hand,
That reaches for another,
Expecting a cold touch.

Just like a newborn child,
Who cries and cries
Each different scream having a different meaning,
Each gasp of breath relaying a significant message onto any ear that can hear,
But still crying,
Because they do not know who knows what they know.

A toddler,
Who clamps down onto the sides of the couch,
As she scales the unchartered territory of using her legs to wander this earth,
The thrill of being able to move in ways they have seen others move,
But still not being able to release their hands,
And truly experience all there is to experience.

My friend in third grade,
Who decided to save 1 cracker from each sleeve of ritz she would have,
And hide it in her desk everyday,
Incase one day she did not have food to bring with her.

The days in middle school,
When someone tells you for the first time they think you are beautiful,
So you decide to wear your hair the same way everyday,
Dress in a similar fashion,
As to not tarnish their belief.

Highschool days,
Where you sit with the same people,
At the same seat,
Everyday at lunch,
And talk about the same 4 things,
To not wander outside the realms of what is known to be safe

In college,
When you rack your brain for hours and hours
As to why those friends left,
If that haircut is the reason why every boy stopped seeing that beauty,
If the couch really ever helped you from getting hurt
Or did it keep you from seeing all you could see.
keep you still.

Did the fear of losing,
The fear of not knowing what could happen next,
Keep you from showing the teacher the ants by your desk
That were not from YOUR snacks,
And instead of telling the teacher the truth,
You decided to silently watch your friend hide them day after day.
And as your silence grew into a habit,
You did not protest when all those people left
Or demand the boys to stop making tents in your heart,
Only to follow the line out the door and close it as the leave.
Surrounding you in a cage of closed locks

Because just like the newborn,
I do not believe, anyone knows what I know.
I will never truly experience all there is to experience.
One day I will not have any food for the day, and I want to be able to rely on the things I left waiting.
in the flow, we melt.
like slipping off pajamas
we sneak from our skin.

our faces are cleaned.
lips shift from the bone laid bare.
small, immature shells.

bright eyes, virtuous.
but our briny hope crumbles.
and then, a flicker.

worn by the pressure,
our skin, bones, eyes to fine sand.
mixed in glass, draining

then sifted apart.
as at the start, new.
CamA Feb 17
Amanda's Hunger

She has a habit of wandering off,
Whilst being in one place.
She'd be staring out the window
Manipulating what she saw,
Into what she wanted it to be.

"I'm hungry"
She'd say, mid mindless gazing,
Only it was rarely for food
But rather for exploration,
Discovery and experiences.

Her soul starved
Of authentic auras that warm you,
Of colliding chords that form aching symphonies,
Of chaotic creations by everyone and anyone,
Of galaxies that we are made from,
Of the beauty she longs to see.

And in these times,
Where her mind is everywhere else,
I imagine she is there where she belongs
With her chaotic people,
Blaring symphonies,
Clashing souls,
Expressive creations,
The Galaxy she is deserving of.
May you be filled with life, my dear.
Mystic Ink Feb 17
Elements of non-sense
Ego, desire, greed, anger, and attachment
Wonderfully wired
Culture of hate, cruelty and war
Radiant flame
Caged human rights
Tears of humanity
Portrait of maternal society

Need air to breathe
Try to discover self
Nothing more sacred
Than a spiritual denominator
Anthem of love
Being human
True value of life
Smell of a human touch
Foundation of hug
Vote for humanity
Everyone wins
Rest in peace

बुद्धम् शरणम् गच्छामि
बुद्धम् शरणम् गच्छामि (Buddham saranam gacchami), means go to the Buddha for refuge. Shared from my Anthology, Canvas: Echoes and Reflections, 2018.
Institutions of other's creation.

For me, I gotta stop paying attention.

The thing about me is, I have kept myself a secret.

I didn't want to taint it, my precious, pop secret.

I left it all behind and went into the mountains.

Felt it was my last shot to face what I have been hiding.

Time here is always insightful.

Likened to organizing emotional Cliff's Notes.

Staring at the screen my eyebrows go together...

Two caterpillar typewriters my thoughts weave together

I am not lost, and what I have discovered,

I can distill experience, turn it into content...

So ill take a little time, scribble out my thoughts...

Into the woods I go, I cannot hear you...

Lost in these thoughts...
Mystic Ink Feb 8
Here I am, in front of myself
Trying to recognize me
What I am to myself
What I am to the rest

Am I the shadow of myself
Or the shadow belongs to me
Wisdom of mine, may set this shadow free

Some days I cast my shadow
Some days my shadow possess me.

I wonder,
why can’t we have the same vision
Me, and the shadow,
Though we have the same pair of eyes
I wonder, do shadow knows my thoughts
At the time when I possess it

The same shadow taught me a lesson
At the time of light, it was with me
In dark, it disappeared.
Forever is relative.

Am I the shadow of myself
Or the shadow belongs to me
Discovering self through search within.
Midnight Feb 8
I'm on a journey
To find
What I lost
My soul
My spirit
My mind//
No map
No compass
Can find
What I'm
Searching for//
A soul cleanse
I crave it
I'll catch it
I'll become it//
SeaChel Feb 6
In this society,
you cannot be at peace with who you are.
You must always find something wrong
with your biological makeup
and every choice that has shaped your personality.

They say, "love yourself,"
yet shame and call those who do narcissists.
I chose to separate myself from this hypocrisy.

I am beautiful,
I am clever,
I am funny,
I am not perfect,
I am me.

I chose to accept all of it;
the ups and the downs,
my vices and virtues,
every single experience I have in life
that will help me grow
into who I am becoming.

Fuck society,
fuck the media,
and fuck you.
I apologize that this has no structure and is just utter word vomit... You really can't even call this poetry.  
I've been going back through my writings from a few years ago and feel they have more of a flow and style.  I'm obviously very different from who I was then, however, so I'm re-defining my style.  
Sometimes you have to destroy it all and find the new out of the chaos (word vomit)
Awada Habiba Feb 3
staring from across the room
i thought to myself
give me a smile, serenity
or just a peace of mind
give me your forever for a while
now ,
down to the core

was feeling like i had sold my soul

till i lied in this hole and let myself roll within the tides of time

i love to be alone but i'll be looking for strangers in the trips of my dreams tonight
i saved myself some trouble for later, for now, i want some fun

tell me about what would make you feel better,
i'll tell you about what's been haunting me
let's trade some sentences and contact
  our worlds' pace been having an impact on how i want us to be

look at me twice to make sure i'll stay for once
let's make each other feel like we're here, like we belong
stop the lookaaways, stop hiding your smile,
wanting to stay in control can be weary at times
there shouldn't need to be a need to  hide
what one's been missing inside of one's soul

4 once,
let me be a kid again, hold my hand
let's stroll our way out of the safe lands' plane like some true
Awada Habiba Jan 29
Turn the lights off
I’m tryna undress my thoughts,
  nowadays I’m loving living inside my daydreams  
and I think the world is prettier than it seems
but to    see     that, you’ve gotta stop for a second.

take your eyes off of your phone, and look life in the eye
the happiness that you’re looking for does not come within a single step, it’s a set of stairs and you’ve gotta climb up the ladder,
but when you start walking towards the path of your dreams, you’ll eventually get there.

Stop fast-forwarding your days, enjoy the ride instead            
     cruise on the way there
  look for secrets within the simple smiles
the things that are hiding could crash your engine.
along the way can't be wished away, they usually come for you;
avoid them, anomalies are not here to say.
Death can tease you, but don't be one of those who die multiple times before they stop breathing.
Grant yourself a rebirth.

You’ve grown in the city and the roots have grown in you, I’m loving the views within me and the things I’m not to do;
running is not an option, there’s a lot more to see
my life is a journey and this love belongs to me.

Every day is a new one, why not be a new you
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