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Ayesha Sep 2022
Sleepless nights
Lost in a million thoughts
Everything is jumbled up
Eyebags always present
Pressure pulling me under

Not noticing the passing hours
Endless daydreams rewind
Even those lost in time
Dreading the morning to come
Escape to another land
Drifting off now...
Feels like I have acute insomnia even though the academic year has only just begin. :'(
iris Aug 2020
I.

A late night trip to the bathroom
shows a warped vision of myself
through a cracked mirror
it tells a story
through the dark circles
under my eyes.
It all tells me to sleep,
although that was already made clear
by my foggy mind and hazy vision.
I go back to bed
but when I close my eyes
I cannot see sleep in the future.
So instead I lay with my eyes open,
staring at the white ceiling.
It looks back at me,
harsh, unforgiving.
The storm outside
does nothing to help
quell the voices in my head.

II.

The voices in my head argue
and tell me that
everything is either all very clear
or a muddled swamp of metaphors.
And they have decided
my life is all one horrible metaphor
for childish infatuations
that could never be
that turn into a stronger feeling.
I tell them to try and be quiet
because I’m trying to sleep,
but they do not quiet.

III.

They do not quiet,
they never do.
Quiet is a warm hug
and space in my head.
Quiet is muted murmurs
creeping up stairs
and slipping through keyholes.
But they do silence.
Silence is deafening.
It lures and traps me in a cage
where I am unable to breathe.
It is a force that stops me
from being human,
it is all consuming.
That is why I let them stay,
because I prefer the chaotic cacophony
of voices
to silence.
They never stop.

IV.

Never stop dreaming
is what everyone says
but I think I did
when I stopped being able to sleep.
The clock blinks 4:32
and so maybe it’s more
early morning than late night,
but is there really a difference?
I’ve given up,
maybe I’ll sleep tomorrow night
instead.
And when they all ask
if I’m okay,
I’ll just tell them
it was a late night.

V.

It was a late night,
I was kept awake by
the voices in my head.
They do not quiet,
They never stop.
It was a late night.
Malikah Awan May 2020
Sleep deprived,
No time to breathe, no where to hide.
Awake,
But not conscious.
Eyes wide open,
But no vision.
Thoughts,
But no reason.
Questions,
But no curiosity.
Alive...
But not really.
Naps hit like a brick wall
At cement semi truck speeds
The collision re-envisions
Clay brick to ice cube
Shattering into my reality,
As I try and get up from
My prone position
My mind fills in the cracks,
Of my name, my place, my childhood,
With the melted mixing moments
It had just shown me before,

Mr. CandyCane visiting last minute,
With exes kissing every other tooth,
Grown bamboo out of a pupil,
Who sits attent in my dog's school,
Greeted by your smiling face at home,
But his face is reflected on my head in your eyes
Forehead lines are my only check at this point,
In dreams my face refuses to show up,
But awake I cannot escape acne wrath
muteD Dec 2019
I can’t get comfortable.
I keep twisting and turning,
turning and twisting.
I hate this time of day.
It’s too quiet.
It’s too dark.
It’s too cold
and it’s too lonely.
My body wants to sleep
but my mind is too awake.
It’s awake and it’s screaming
in agony.
Wanting to be heard
but needing to rest.
Wrote this at like 3 am today..
The moon glistens,
A lullaby had creeped,
Inveigles me to sleep
with my eyes open.
Tori Jones Dec 2018
You call me shy
And mock my every move
You make me fight
Just to prove myself to you...
Thoughts

You tell me lies
And trap me inside
You make me cry
Leaving me sleep deprived...
Isolation

You tell me I'm not wanted
And pierce my flesh with your impurities
Until I've gone too far
Killing me along with my insecurities...
Depression

You make my heart beat fast
Whenever someone walks past
You make me feel
Like everyone's judging me...
Anxiety

You remind me of everything I've done
Telling me I'll never be good enough
That I'll never be loved
Because I've done too much...
Regret

You lock me to the ground
Placing chains all around
You make me want to hide
From the world outside...
Fear

You take everything from me
Leaving me broken and hopeless
You drain my energy
And leave me restless
You make me nervous and anxious
Over absolutely nothing
You let me feel nothing but pain and suffering...
Life
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