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Aug 10 · 372
Stargazing
c Aug 10
There's just something romantic about cornfields and 3am
Maybe it’s just the optimist inside of me
But the stars are shining so bright tonight, don’t you think?
They are so bright, the sky is so clear,
and I can feel your hand pressed against my side,
attached like a name
Maybe you’re afraid of the cold too

It was cloudy, the light on the edge of the horizon
Polluting the stars, they weren’t that bright
I feel you pull my body away from me
It’s so strange to feel warm, to feel anything
You embrace the cold

I cannot save you anymore than I can avoid becoming
The same sky I stare at

The breeze dances across my stomach as you bring me closer
Eyes staring into a cold sky
As you listen to me ramble on
About where the big dipper should be
If the stars were bright enough to see it
Jul 2020 · 307
The Streets
c Jul 2020
She belongs to the streets.
They’ve been calling her name
Since the day that he left
Stubs her toe on the curb
As she attempts to fly off
Into the traffic, with no second glance.
Jun 2020 · 246
Tasting Stardust
c Jun 2020
Reach down and wrap me in celestial bodies
I imagine the warmth of stars,
Standing under a blanket of constellations
Fireflies dance on my fingertips
As if stellar incarnate
This interstellar silence surrounds me
And for the first time in a while
The universe is okay
I am not okay now but I will be
Jun 2020 · 390
Time Will Tell
c Jun 2020
I have been falling in love
With finding distraction
In every person I meet
Wasting time is all I seem to do well

I am running out
Of time to waste
And I’m not sure
I can distract myself
Any longer
May 2020 · 347
Romeo
c May 2020
The last time that you kissed me
There was poison on your tongue
If you ever start to miss me
I hope you know
That I’m long gone
To the boy who is nowhere near worth dying for. I hope it tasted good going down.
May 2020 · 452
4 Things I Hate About You
c May 2020
The way you didn’t kiss me
at the top of the Ferris Wheel.

The way you kissed me
at the bottom of my sense of self.

The way I had your fingerprints on my thighs for 2 weeks after you left me.

The way I want you
to leave me wanting again.
For R
May 2020 · 319
Sometime Before 45
c May 2020
I know you think
I’m counting down the days
But I’m just trying to make
The days count.

People tell me
45 is so young,
Why would I want to believe
I’ll be gone by then?

I say
It has taken me 18 years
To get where I am.

I’m afraid
Of what will happen
After 18 more.
On a premonition that I’m going to die fairly young
Mar 2020 · 398
Strawberry Melancholy
c Mar 2020
Lipstick butterflies float on the mirror’s heavy condensation
She is a vermillion explosion
Heavy colored lids and
Winged eyeliner as if
She too
Could fly
This is the glitz and glamour
of how to disappear
Dec 2019 · 414
Selfishly Loving You
c Dec 2019
I’ve been loving you selfishly
Saving every moment that makes me smile
As if you don’t feel happiness too

Did you know that I love you?
Until I met you
I didn’t even know
How to love myself
For G, who doesn’t know that I might love him
Dec 2019 · 420
...Yet
c Dec 2019
I like the word “yet”
Because it opens the door
To possibility

You don’t love me
Yet
But that doesn’t mean
You never will
I’ve had writers block for months and haven’t written while I worked on myself. I’ve gotten into a healthier mindset, and I can’t wait to share it with all of you.
Nov 2019 · 415
Loving You
c Nov 2019
We are falling in love with ourselves
The way we are imperfectly perfect
And how we are made
for something bigger than this moment
Nov 2019 · 354
Nothing Gold Can Stay
c Nov 2019
Yesterday we breathed the last of autumn
Our first, maybe our last
I tasted winter today
A bit too bitter for my liking
There’s always something sharp biting my tongue now
I can only watch
As my words freeze in the air
Before reaching you
The leaves are gone too soon
What does that say about us?
Oct 2019 · 568
Haunted
c Oct 2019
I’m not afraid of ghosts
But I don’t like the way things linger
Like laughter
Or cologne
Or the feel of your skin on mine
Sep 2019 · 379
Sucker
c Sep 2019
I am-
sugar sweet stuck-
On the idea that something
Is better than nothing
Sep 2019 · 671
Language Barrier
c Sep 2019
I am unlearning you
The way I learn Spanish
Repeating your name
Until it sets on my tongue
Like caramel
And I trap it in my throat
Sep 2019 · 562
Head-On Collision
c Sep 2019
I am riding in the backseat of Desire
Lust rides shotgun, mocking me
It would be nice to see you
Growing distant in the rear view mirror
But the headlights coming towards us
Are just a bit too bright
I’m tired of asphalt burns
Sep 2019 · 312
Web of Lies
c Sep 2019
Mr. Spider
You’ve caught me in your web again
I’m sorry I haven’t learned
From past mistakes

It’s my own fault
That my wings are damaged

I have a passion
For flying into things too fast
Sep 2019 · 243
Not In My Best Interest
c Sep 2019
My body rises in opposition
To doing things in my best interest
It craves poison
Jagged rocks
And people who don’t love me back
Sep 2019 · 378
Catching Honeys Being Fly
c Sep 2019
You call me pretty like it’s nothing
Good-looking when you don’t mean it
Honey on the fly trap
Keeping me sugar sweet stuck
Sep 2019 · 207
Pleonasm
c Sep 2019
I don’t love you
I usually don’t even like you
But there’s something about you
That makes me want you more
than anyone ever should
Sep 2019 · 330
Distance
c Sep 2019
I’ve missed you in so many ways
The minutes and miles between us
Grow my heart ever fonder
And it scares me
Because I’m never sure
That you feel the same
Aug 2019 · 1.1k
Down the Hatch
c Aug 2019
I think my tragic flaw
Is reading the warning label
On every person
And pulling a Romeo
On each boy
marked “Toxic”
Aug 2019 · 781
Icarus
c Aug 2019
Fly me
To the sun
You always like to
See me burn
As I
Fall
My future without you is so bright it’s burning
Aug 2019 · 460
The Fall
c Aug 2019
Are you afraid of heights?
We’ve been climbing higher and higher
And I’m too scared to look down
My hands are slipping
My eyes are glued to the ground below
Are you reaching a hand to me?
I don’t fear the landing anymore
I fear the fall
You keep blocking my path back up
Aug 2019 · 749
Superstition
c Aug 2019
You are Friday the 13th
And I am the glass mirror
Shattering before you
Have we always been so unlucky?

I have this superstition
That once I love you
You’ll leave

And you’re walking away now

I’d be lying if I said I could do the same
Aug 2019 · 276
Blizzard
c Aug 2019
It’s kinda crazy
How you talk like maple syrup
And think like a long winter
Your words bite
Like stinging sleet

I find cuddling by the fire
With a cup of coco
And blankets piled high
So soothing

But shouldn’t I be worried
About the storm raging outside?
Aug 2019 · 554
I Don’t K(No)w
c Aug 2019
You make me afraid to say no
By putting words in my mouth
That don’t belong
Until I’m choking
On the words
You want to hear
Jul 2019 · 470
Under the Influence
c Jul 2019
Moscato smile
Curl your lips
And curl your toes
Liquid dusk in a dusty glass
The lines between forgetting the reason
And forgetting the person
Are blurred
I pour another glass anyway
Jul 2019 · 407
One Year
c Jul 2019
I miss you sometimes
And it’s not that I don’t miss you other times
It’s just that
Sometimes
I freeze and I see you
And I hear your laugh
And I hear you call my name
And it takes everything in me
To not run to you
Because I know that you aren’t here anymore

The years go by faster the older I get
Can you let me know if I’m wasting precious time in advance?
I wish I could time travel but the seconds are still slipping past my fingertips before I can hold them.

I think it’s a blessing to find you in other people.
But you are not other people.
I’m sorry I wasn’t there.
I’m sorry I didn’t say goodbye.
I’m sorry I can’t change the past.
I’m sorry.
It’s been one year since my grandpa passed away.
Jul 2019 · 302
A Tale of Fire and Ice
c Jul 2019
I’ve always been one to enjoy the burn
But this
This is a new level
Of salt in the wound

You are cold to the touch
Leaving blisters
Where you grab my wrist
And pin me down

The longer you stay
The longer I scream
Until the pain is numb
And I do not feel enough
To need you to leave

You burn me anyway
Jul 2019 · 1.4k
Ice Boy
c Jul 2019
Ice Boy
You’re not so cold to the touch
When your lips are on mine
And your heartbeat’s a rush

Ice Boy
Is this the thing that you planned?
Do you sharpen your blades
While I melt in your hand?

Ice Boy
My heart sinks like a stone
I thought that I could chase you
Now I’m cold and alone
Jun 2019 · 470
Déjà Vu
c Jun 2019
I am addicted to deja vu
In the form of
Sunsets
And goodbyes
And thinking I’ve found love

And hey, you seem so familiar.
Have I seen you somewhere before?
Jun 2019 · 857
After a June Storm
c Jun 2019
Jumping into puddles
And jumping into love
Both leave me so muddled
And I just can’t get enough

But mud belongs in puddles
And flower petals fall
This “he loves me, he loves me not”
Will surely end it all
Jun 2019 · 606
Too Hard
c Jun 2019
I am afraid of lots of things
But mostly of myself
Because I love
Too hard
And I fall
Too hard
And I hit the ground
Too hard
I’m not sure I can get up this time
Jun 2019 · 346
Indian Summer
c Jun 2019
I think loving you is like
Indian summer
So warm
And beautiful
And gone so quickly
You do not cherish
The sunlight hours
But kiss me hello
When I am falling asleep
Beneath the stars
I do not know what to call us
Jun 2019 · 792
Love Me Hard
c Jun 2019
Please do not tell me
You love me
Because that scares me so much more
Than loving you
Ever could
Jun 2019 · 638
Ticket to Happiness
c Jun 2019
My soul is flying
I am an adrenaline ******
High on the excitement
Of being alive
I am in love
With this wild ride
Called living
May 2019 · 362
Synopsis
c May 2019
I am impatient with information
I flip to the back of a book
To preview the ending
I don’t like surprises
I read the plot for a movie
Before I ever see it
Just so I always know
Exactly what comes next
You cannot read people like a book
And there’s no plot guide
For relationships
But I always try to spot the end
Before it’s near
May 2019 · 442
Rocks & Grudges
c May 2019
I have a rock
With my name on it
And one for my father
And one for my brother
And one for each of the boys
Who broke me

They are grudges I carry with me
Heavy in my pockets
One step away  
From the cement blocks
Tied to my feet

Someday I will throw these grudges
As far as my body will allow
In hopes that they land in water
Less shallow
Than the names on the rocks
May 2019 · 454
Like My Father
c May 2019
You call me a heartbreaker
I say-
Like father
Like daughter
You get good at breaking hearts
When yours is broken
By the one who gave it to you
May 2019 · 460
Dear Poets
c May 2019
Does riding home
Without a seatbelt
(Left unbuckled on purpose)
Count as a suicide attempt?

Asking for a friend
Who lost control of the wheel
May 2019 · 1.7k
Toxic Jock Syndrome
c May 2019
I’m not an object
And I am tired
Of always being played
May 2019 · 366
Radio Silence
c May 2019
I’m waiting
For a three word echo
But all I hear
Is radio silence
And my ears are ringing
Like the heavy air
Before a thunderstorm
May 2019 · 1.5k
I don’t like it
c May 2019
I don’t like
The way
I put all of myself
Into every single thing
I set my mind to

And that included
Loving you
And that included
Burning my bridges
And that included
Wondering why I let myself burn in the process
I don’t like the way I don’t mean anything to you
c May 2019
1.  I lie when I say I Love You

1b. Maybe it’s because I’m a compulsive liar or maybe it’s because I add a big DON’T in the middle, but either way, I lied

2. you are a dying star folding in on itself and I cannot support the cold dead core you're going to leave behind

3. your tongue tastes like espresso and caffeine makes my heart beat way too fast

4. you say "maybe" too much and act like its a promise waiting to be broken

5. I am SO GOOD at loosing sleep! Over you! Because of you!

6. you have never cried in front of me

7. you have really good music taste and I don't want my favorite playlist to ruin me when you leave

8. I once read that indecision is the present form of regret. you can't make up your mind and I'm starting to think that's a sign

9. you drink to get drunk and I drink what tastes good. now my throat is burning and I’m not sure if it’s from the words stuck inside it or the whiskey in your kiss.

10.
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