In the end I only have a few excerpts—
beer soaked wisdom,
harsh, morning-light realities:

I don't love effortlessly.
I don't reach for anything out of my grasp.
My hands are always searching
trying to touch soil beneath sidewalks.
Aspirations of affection like dandelions—
vibrancy in a concrete wasteland.
My knuckles will bleed,
my palms will bear callouses of futility.

You were the first effortless thing.
If I had a moment I could relive,
I couldn't.
I strive to recall a moment untainted.

Fall victim to my words.
Feel concrete turn to sand;
lay in the remains with me.

amalia 12h

I love him...
For God Sake
I love him....

I love him...
For whatever it is he's done to me
For whatever risk he took to treat me right

I love him...
For bad or good

I love him...
For today, still continue at tomorrow

I love him...
Like i said yesterday...

she dreams of him at night
touching herself
under the covers

silent beautiful moans
escape her parted lips
as her dainty fingers
linger to the most
precious part of her

slowly moving in and out
imagining it's him
touching her all over

she closes her eyes
picturing his rough
large hands roaming
all over her petite body

her breath hitches
her toes curl
her stomach knots

it's coming
she's coming

all because of him

- wet dreams

when u have a wet dream ab the boy u like so u write ab it???

Shamelessly coveting someone that he did not need.
She was incredibly scary for driving on the wrong roads.
He became breathless whenever she drove past him.
The way she swerved around some obstacles and hit others.
Everything was going to change for him as soon as he got with her.
Whenever she thought he was going to kiss her and ride … he did not.
Her whistles of sex and drugs and sadness did not let him come closer.
Breaking most of the rules was her way of trying to kiss him.
But he did not want to take everything out on her.
She was screaming at him, “Come closer and I promise I’ll bite a little less!”
Their hands touched and she did not let go as the love of her life was moving her.
He rides with her into space she always stares in while slowly regretting it.
The wind from their tantrums was blowing through their hair.
He did not want to love her so he made himself not to.
Strong attraction between them and he still did not want to.
This ride would be their love song even if they killed each other in the end.

how do you make fire,
she asks me.

i steal it off your eyes
every time
you think about him

and it burns.


-- Eleanor

You wrapped your arms
around me in the middle of the
night, I almost forgot what it
was like to be cared for,
until you reminded me.
And when I came over
and took care of you
while you were drunk
I was in fear,
because growing up
and even in past relationships
I only saw violence in
intoxicated men.
But when you looked at me,
while I was only wearing
an old T-Shirt and shorts,
and called me beautiful
I knew I shouldn't be afraid.
You started showing me what it's
like to be cared for,
instead of abused
and used.
And I know I may be scared sometimes,
almost like some sort of
bad PTSD,
but please just stay with me.

I didn't know love before you
I didn't know how to love

I didn't know that fairy tales could come true
I didn't know how to feel before you touched me

I didn't know how to see
Till you saw me , so I saw me through your eyes , till I learnt how to see for myself

I didn't know that love could feel this good  
Till you made me feel like an angel that deserves nothing but love and preservation

I didn't know anything
Now I still don't know a lot
But I do  know this .....
I am irrevocably in love with you .

Just a love story that isn't mine , yet again .

I may not have exaggerating poetic diction
Or the most flowering words
Or the right syntax
To describe how wonderful you are
I may be cheesy, and cringe halfway through
But I still won't care, as long as it's for you

i hope you're having a great day

once you graduate high school
you see people for who they
really are

people change and
sometimes not for the better

your best friend is now your
worst enemy
the person who intimidated you
is now one of your friends
the boy you had a crush on
is now irrelevant

some people enter high school
with tons of friends
and leave with a few friends

others enter high school
with a few friends
and leave with none at all

- my high school experience

my high school experience in a poem

They'll let you
destroy yourself
for them,
and when you decide you
have had enough pain,
and leave,
they'll act like you
were the one who
ruined it.

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