for I have seen,
     my word is death.
my word in my mind
     creates my life,
and in my life is death,
    so my word is death.

there's so much of it,
so many versions of this
  word.

a word written, spoken,
        thought...
and it is death.
       over and over,
       it is death.

many deaths,
      one death,
      over and over
      by one word.

but what word is it?
      what word that creates life,
      and therefore death?

because this one death,
this death I die,
      over and over,
      by this word,
it is killing me.

it smothers my life,
      my love my heart.

now if only it was
     this word,
a word of love,
      would that it would create
      only love,
      but hate would follow
      in it's stead.

and so it is with all
     these words,
      joy and sorrow,
      hope and fear
      charity and greed.

and so thus it is
       that my word is life
       and it was death
       because in both
       all things are
       over, and over.

and my word was death.

written on 1/7/2017 enhanced by Glass Animals WYRD from the album ZABA.
This is my wyrd, woven from the threads I have provided by my past thoughts and actions; I myself have designed the unfolding pattern of my life." from Urban Dictionary
Anyone 2d

Rightful living is
rare to find nowadays
Use and abuse
Are the same nowadays
Goals and tools
Mixed up nowadays
Don't live your life
Making your goal
A neverlasting tool
To always abuse it
Never to use it
For the rightful purpose
But for a worthless living

Fire 3d

Depression is an addiction
A saddists representation
Of what is a fascination
You want love without pain
But you end up with pain and no love
No this isn't freedom you don't end it with a white dove.
You're happy but you're fighting that feeling
To rip your skin till its tingling
And you know your okay
But the pain could return any day
And you long for that certain kind of sadness
That energy you get from all the badness
And your mother said no
But your heart said don’t let go
And you’re fighting a war inside your head
And the place to find rest isn’t your bed
You prey, you pray
You let go of the fray
But you don’t fall

God is that you? Am I dead? Is it true?
Why child don’t you see? I sent my son to save thee.
You’re not dead. Not even near.
I’ve come to take away all your fear.
Oh God I don’t deserve this.
This heavenly abyss.
I’ve done wrong for all to long.
I don’t deserve your love. I don’t deserve to be up above.
Child be at peace. Your sin is yet to cease.
You are human are you not?
Or have you forgot?
But my mercy is abundant
And you’ve yet to pass your judgement
Child I will give you what you seek
If you may ask me, if you’re not too meek.
Father, forgive me, all I have is yours
It may not be much but I’m down on all fours.
Child I forgive you, but this is your cue
Go out and spread my word
My beautiful song bird

Her mind is numb
Her colors are dim
Her lungs are filled
She can't swim
Drowning in booze
She can't float to the surface
She's lost in this big ocean
Slowly losing her
                                      p   u    r   p   o   s   e

She is unstable.
Erin 4d

That first time he touched me, I could have screamed,
Demanding to know where he has been, or if fate forgot about our destiny, temporarily…
Because in that moment his hands were all I needed
and I had needed them for so very long, that affection… provided direction, for a soul who was wandering lost for what felt like eternity

her long limbs stretched out
as bright sunbeams streamed in,
pale plastic trim in the golden hue,
oh, how she wishes to be like you,
she’s got your smile and memories, true,
and in candlelight, when Santana is playing,
we dance, cheek to cheek, like we always do,
but every so often, in those quiet spaces,
when I grow silent, and cannot speak,
her senses see where my head is at,
she slips away to peek at old photos
of our happiest times and places,
those pictures of our young faces,
wondering if her shadow is yours,
or something altogether new.

By Arcassin Burnham


This is that all of a sudden my grandpa got diabetes
bullshit,
That Chemo can fight all types of cancers type of
bullshit,
I love you but i think i need space for some time
bullshit,
I want my virginity taken like everybody in my class
bullshit,
I'm gonna  complain and complain to anger my husband even more
bullshit,
she told me I had to be big down there to please her good
bullshit,
At the end of the day you think I'm your friend, on some back stabbing
bullshit,
I don't know why people listen to television
bullshit,
this that eat everything in the fridge and leave everybody nothing
bullshit,
What are you gonna do shit,
the world ain't what it seems and just you blind bullshit,
I rather raise money to move to another country and get a passport
bullshit.

©abpoetry2017
http://arcassin.blogspot.com/2017/07/cant-be-silenced-surprise-ep-explicit.html

...might as well be?


(sonnet #MMMMMMCCCCLXXXV)


Lo, now the moon peers in to splash a pale
Glance 'cross Mum's carpet, up my legs and thence
Upon these silent hands sans voice, a sense
Thet silver eye just watches, what'd avail?
The Scriptures.  As tree silhouettes detail
Nigh ghastly clouds with blackened figures, hence
Recall "...one glory of the sun--" fr'intents:
"...Another of the moon--" what, in betrayl?
Forsooth.  I am not Mum, nor shall in poor
Scuse ever match up.  Yet what should I do?
My aunt sez God has me still here as twere
To do His will.  I can't but own tis true.
Dreams, prayrs, half mock what is.  Whatever, fer
All that is my work?  Someday swear I knew?

09Jul17a

What WAS rather freaky was the next day I discovered Courtney had published a pretty number on howling at the moon over a lover, and my dad over dinner mentioned it had apparently been a fool moon.  Oops, my bad, full moon.
alan Jul 10

Life has no meaning, to me, to them,
but I live for a reason, for me, for them.
Life goes on, it will for years,
so why should I sit here in lonesome helplessness?
I am able to walk, to stand, to help, to help me, and them.
But I'm stuck in the selfish turn of things, too tired to try again.
I rather get up and do something,
and for the rest of the day be at peace with myself,
knowing that a bit of my heart was devoted to it.
I am one person, what can one person do?
Everyone is one, one person, me, them.
People have done things because they are able, am I too able yet?
I have been trying so hard to show people the meaning of life,
but I feel it's nonexistent, but
the reason to live, well, I have a reason, I have a purpose;
to try and make tomorrow better, as long as
there is a
tomorrow.

BSeuss Jul 9

I sometimes walk back into a public establishment, for a logical reason in myself, simply because I've  seen a person who looked curios to me. When I notice that they are no longer their as I enter and take my seat, I continue on. Nothing changes.

I've come a long long way.
When I was a little boy, I would breakdown in tamper-tantrums, because someone I cared about for no reason had disappeared,  never to be seen again.

(Hi, may I have a large coffee, please. That's all)

It is what is.
I guess I'm still me at heart.
Professor thoughts.
Transcendent soul.
But a kid, when I laugh.
I am still the kid I was..... difference is, I have to go to work now.
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