Smiles, tram cars, stinging eyelids
Transparent brittle shards,
Ashes finding water surface
All of this onto a palm
Locked into a fist

I’m the coin that’s landing on its rim
The odds were slim and yet
I am standing on a grin
The third side says that
Karma always wins

There is no savior
for all;
there's even no
individual salvation

You know the cost
of a call,
but that of
conversation?

You can hear,
that I know,
but can you listen?
And when you talk
is it the things
you say
or is it in the way...
What is absent,
is it missing?

You love green
And evergreen sheds cloth only to Fire...

* *

Colors only make sense
Beneath the touch of your hands

*

Desert sands are clothes
******* an oasis
Warmth divine in your colors

*

You are not my glue… you are not my stitches… you are the wholeness that my wishes dared reach for… the one for which I’m healing...

* *

Your salt is flowing into the dark seas of my eyes… and behind the horizon of my lips, a smile is waiting to rise for you...

We brave uncharted waters
on boat with crumpled sails
We float where it is hotter
but that's another tale

We lose ourselves on purpose
in storms and surging waves
We dwell upon the surface
but it's the depths we crave

Words are the hands of thoughts;
Fingertips flow
Where she clenches her eyes
Sinking teeth
In lower lip
Prison bars to sighs
Anchored to liberty
Looming like a storm
in the distance

She’s dancing:
Closed eyes,
Open palms ,
Vague smile

She is music;
And sound waves
Are dancing to her

And when she moves
Her clothes are naked;
And when she smiles,
My thoughts are
(words are flaking)

*

She tunes me
To her frequency
Riding waves
Pulling vibes and strings
Charting shores
Wanting replay
Asking for more

Falling with the rain
crashing on the pavement
I’m coming down
From high… the highest clouds
Taking the long free fall

I cannot stop falling
for You...

As I lose my way
in an endless ocean
made of flowing knowledge,
my head feels like an anchor,
towing down my heart
below the waves of facts,
to the depths of information
as I drown I do attract
insatiable predators,
all the while,
above the surface
all is doomed to fall
beneath the rising tide,
slowly crawling up
to eat the howling sky

slowly going crazy
twisted and burnt
two different faces
one charcoal soul

sizzling and blazing
crackling in the mud
I've been tainting lately
all I touch and learn

falling out of grace
beyond forgiveness
I return
into the ashes of my days
my heart is now the urn

my deepest smiles are cuts
into the flesh of joy
I need to learn the art of healing
before it's all destroyed

...thoughts and feelings are soulless soldiers
bleeding my blackness like ink
leading the cracks to the brim
And do they dip deep, indeed...
they come out the other side thinning
and thinning still
and thinning
and seething my fabric
as my quietness parallels the tempo of serration
the wanting of you:
to flow and embrace
my every erasure
with the renewal
the slow violent blossoming
flowing and growing
into our fragrance
Our one world

Heels harder than steel
Sharper still
In his heart
Smooth arks
Curves looping
Strong desires
Cutting loose
Weak restraints
Through frail defenses
His achilles heel
A separate entity
Embodied in the shape
Of a fallen angel
Insatiably inviting
The arrows of Apollo
Choosing carefully
Her Paris-es

I'm tasting sugar on my eyelids
Syrup on my irises
Sour on my heartstrings
Bitter in my arteries
But we are more than corporeal
Meant to fly
And cross the boundaries
Transcend the frames of nature’s canvas
Spill our colors farther than the physical
We invent what we do not discover
The horizons and the realms of our future
And I am just like you
A mess of senses that
perception blends into

Invisible lines and curves
Extend from skin to skin,
In waves, from eyes to eyes
Closing the distance faster than light
Is this gravity,
Catching the eyes,
Binding the minds,
Bending the thoughts,
Charging the skin,
Pulling us in?

Hypergraphia is lacerating carotid
Finally bloodletting into slumber
Hippocampus that
Incinerates its own
Neuron forest and becomes
A conflagration
Because chars are ruby embers
In nocturnal hunger
Of the lens nucleus
Shaken in the tremors
Deep below tectonic plates
Disjointed in the fabric of reality
Severing the empyreal bonds;
Do not hold back,
But onwards, Horsemen,
Hammer that stampede
Unto centaur constructs
Fleeing from the dreamer
Let them shatter in the cracks
Sinking with the dirt into oblivion

her lips,
of blooming poppy,
hold promises of *****,
slipping past the choices,
knowing they'd be caught
too late, and not before
they've met desires
secretly
in shadows underneath
the moonlit balconies

every grain of sand
is secretly
a polyhedron
that despises science
like every grain of joy
has at least one side
that hurts

life
a careless child
messy room
scattered toys around

too young for chess
abusing pawns
and queens alike
some lost at best,
others lying broken
on the ground

and me
I am a cube
at the hands of curiosity,
fingers tightly clenched;
is it persistence now
or is it animosity
beating sides and edges
against the circle slot;
it doesn't take a sage
to see
there never was a plot

Falling, not fallen
She was no man’s
But a nomad
She was the comet
Finally caught
In His gravity

Her celestial body
Lured beneath
Her stellar sails
By a solar flare
Lowering anchor

I found a new way
of being misunderstood
all the while
looking for the opposite;
arriving at the shores
of the wrong land,
so my discoverers
and your natives
immediately went to war;
thus worlds collide
at the hands of words

flying now erratic circles
I'm the moth who didn't flee
glutinous tongue of careless wind
caught me in a single lick
pulling inexorably into the opening
through the lid ajar I went
above the window sill
and straight into the eyes
of a room clad in light

it's turning warm to hot as I orbit closer
and closer still to the ceiling deity
I came in from the wide open void
I came in from the purposeless
the great free emptiness
where skies were grey and cold
I came in to embrace the bright frail sun transparently imbued
with the gift of gods

I pledge my wings to you
though charred into disfigured trails like brush strokes on some
impressionist painting

No longer are you transparent
no longer am I winged
and for a split-second in suspended animation
it was worth it ten times over

Conflagration rages
through the neuron forest;
in the end were lies,
deceived by honesty.

The first to flee
were all the beasts,
while the humane
remained behind
to burn up in a trace
of sapience.

What leaves won’t leave you
What’s rooted holds you
What flies sees you exposed
What lies stays a child
What dries up won’t remain dry
What’s come to pass shall roll again
Old songs don’t go when new ones play
Things drip and flood, dance out their pace
A snaking river knows its way
No tongue to speak or eyes to see
This realm spins to realign
So every sunbeam finds its tree

*   *   *

Което те напуска, няма да те пусне
Което корени е пуснало, държи те
Което лети, те вижда открит
Което лъже, дете си остава
Което пресъхва, няма сухо да остане
Което е минало, пак ще се търколи
Не изчезват старите песни пред новите
Неща капят, заливат, танцуват си темпото
Лъкатушеща река пътя си знае
Без език да говори и очи да види
Тази шир се върти до подреждане
За да може всеки лъч да намери дървото си

I'm a biochemical construct
mechanical of flesh and bone
software-infused hardware being,
another release,
an incrementally updated
version of humanity;
all off my data cells
come with prerequisites
I had no knowledge of;
the veins of my dreams
were blueprints and schemes
in my mother’s blood
in my father’s skin;
I scribble but cannot rewrite
the me, the I,
procedurally generated,
processed by algorithms;
and the purpose is clear
perpetuate and iterate,
move on with baby steps
not merely in time and distance,
but beyond existence

do not even blink;
once it's out
there's no holding back
what follows;
lids and eyelashes
keeping in check
all of this
salty bitterness,
a levy or a dam,
and I'd never rhyme your tears
with anything

writing like

- a grocery list of metaphors

- for a cooking recipe instruction

- or some kind of

- shipping manifesto;

- let your deductive mind

- interpret its own flow

- since that's the one thing

- we don't naturally grow

- but if you put too much spice in that dish

- bear in mind

(x) it’s best served cold

Entwined,
heavy with fruit,
she is suspended in time
Caught in a move
endlessly smooth,
her body winds up,
hugging the cold
pillars and walls,
stretching about,
reaching around
and out to the sky.

She can curve it
in every way
on a whim,
however she pleases
... and droplets will shine
on her body like lotion,
or jewelry, playfully teasing,
although frozen, the motion,
warm is her dance
in the hands of the sun
and the tickling breeze

Je te veux

Comme le nageur a soif d’air

Je te rêve  

Comme la flamme rêve le ciel

Je t’adore
Ma folie,

La coleur vraie de mon coeur

The heart, the warmest sea;
night dives in
chasing dreams,
then suddenly
the day has come ashore;
a smile crawls blissfully
and parts the waves
to reach the sun
to ask for more
of the same
exchange of warmth

I'd share the sky
with the clouds
but I had to grow my wings
but I had to lose my skin
I dared to reach
paradise
but my brothers took my skin
but my brothers used my skin

and I couldn't let them win
so I had to let this in
now it's tearing us within
and it's the fruit our sins
cause I had to grow my wings
but my brothers used my skin

I made them crawl
took my time nice and slow
feels so good to lose control
like a witness, watched them fall

now I'm free to flee this skin
but I will not shed this sin
and I cannot be complete

An angel fell because… (skip gender-”biased pronouns” here or anonymize with asterisk lunacy) wings were in conflict… the left one anxiously ***** equality, not knowing that would mean a lack of lift and loss of aerodynamic quality… the right one, weaponized, stiffly resolved, glides over the notion that all feathers should be attached talons, even though it doesn’t make sense to fight gravity with sharpness…
And so the angel split with Grace and tumbled… eventually lost the race to inertia… another force to add up to internal struggle and its intensifying pressures...

Bloodlust
Predatory
Drooling on my heart
clawing for the treat
those eyes in ambush
lying in uneasy wait
on the brink, sharpened teeth
savoring the foretaste
breathing in the promises
I will not delay
the inevitable

lips all blades
my skin a sea of pins
bristled for the kiss
tongues coiling for the cut
the cold caress and warm
metallic flavor
sweetness in the air calls
******* the shadows

So much color and
So little light
The trees are jewels
Veiled by the sky

The moon is a question mark,
A door of the night
And I am none of its answers
But I enjoy the conversation

flying high
swooping fast
climbing
pulling gravity

seeking
lost among the clouds
(frantic)
you among the clouds
where exactly

approximately close
relatively distant
far beyond earshot
and visual

no wings
just me
no dreams
just you
all the way
everywhere

are you moving
looking
knowing if you stopped
you'd fall
and that
would be the end of us

I am keeping my momentum
incessantly in motion
feeling if I stopped
I'd drop
like a stone,
the impact, our extinction

Deep…
I’m sinking in the dark
The world is upside down
Just the way it should be
I’m taken in by warm skies
And the clouds are tangible

The steep curves of slopes
I climbed crawling
Your breath, the gust
That turned my world over

To reach the rain
I danced on skin
Trenching spells
Caressed soft soil
To split for me a sea of thighs
So I could go the distance
Where We end up as God

Sugar is bad for you,
especially,
saccharine maple thoughts
that you cannot afford
due to the hazard
of overweight ego
dense with the aftertaste
of adipose fantasies
clogging the arterial bonds
that tether you
to solid ground

Stop the caramelized madness
from carbohydrating your soul
into victim obesity
causing the full
arrest of your spirit

The sweet is guilty,
distorted in mirrors,
a negative image
of a past feeling,
present reflection
born of the collision
of intentions and consequences

She is loved. She is stubborn
Mad at that part of the world
That loves her
For loving her
Without asking first

She never asked for this
Though the space between her lines
Already did

Those words
Those traitors
How dare I
Understand with
my heart

She needs to need
She wants the thirst
The hunger, the craving
The needing, the yearning,
The lack at its worst

She wants
none of the learning;
Only the burning
That gives her the thrill
The stinging,
The near-numb
Throbbing
In every flutter
Between every pulse
Through every string

Giving her is
Taking from her
Would it work in reverse?



She is loved.
Stubbornly denying it.
Fearing her happiness.
Banishing the ones who care.

Because her happiness
Potentially could mean
Not having things
to write about
It equals change
And breaking out the zone
Of torturous comfort



I’m afraid of what she seeks
And how she sees those burning curls
And what she does with sparks
And why she fosters embers

I’m scared the most
Of her using flames divine
To burn herself inside
A dark obsession
That swallows every light

*

I’m afraid she seeks love
So she could hurt herself with it
She uses it
As a means to an end
The end being the feeling
Of being hurt
So the ashes of that
Would be her ink
Fuelling her pyre
Of
“behold the beauty of suffering”

Behind the floating point
we, the other digits,
mere fading ripples,
undulate until
we drown into oblivion

staring contest in public transport
and the stranger’s eyes
were her passport
passed the check at customs
crossed the borders of an impulse
I was hers and she was mine
until the station

my coffee daydreams
mad with jealousy
because reality was
standing true in front of me

Love doesn't rhyme;
the rules imposed,
the frames we chose,
do not apply,
although we try
to tame its flow
we sink below,
we seek
salvation by escape;
we bravely dove
but there's the threat
of drowning

the rhythm
and the melody
it's giving us,
all random...
but do we
lose ourselves
to find them,
or is it them
we lose
to find ourselves,
I cannot help
but wonder...

the stones are thrown
the flock transforms
from sheep to wolves
to eat their own

The curse of eternal life
Would be, watching
Every one you love, die

...and she felt like
Her bones were buried
In her body
Unapologetically
Apathetic

She had eaten eons,
Watched the ends
Of millions of clocks’ lifetimes
Snorted the rust of their
Idle hands, dead still
In the blank stare
Of their concentric silence

She wanted to cease
This void existence,
For boredom was
Her ultimate torture

your expressing sunshine
like unforgiving aspects
raising ******
camouflaging silver
meshing razor teeth
because back it up honey
lunacy is saccharine sweetness
  
your suppressing moonshine
chains of bitter freedom
rays are often hidden
beneath a skin of ashes
there is taste to savour
of warmth and promise
where madnesses collide

I wrote a poem for you

but I keep changing the words

because I'm learning

“I’m your key, Pandora;
I’m just as guilty
as you are”

In my left hand a joker,
In my right a Jack of Hearts:
A wild card that will break this game
And I know in these crimes nobody can claim-
Their hearts back.

The dealer, the eyes of Judgement
Offers me a King of Spades,
Which I could use to dig up my grave
After you withdraw your red knave.

I dig my nails into my palms
The game is on
the stakes are way too high
my queen of hearts is
reflected in your eyes

Thumb is rubbing on that
ace of spades
the hard way always taught
me
I should know my place
but I cannot resist your call

Солта е (гора) иглолистна

Целогодишната истина

Чиито очи цветовете Ти не сменят

..*,

Salt is… (a forest) coniferous

Truth perennial

Whose eyes don’t ever shed your colors

the dress is lying still
on her hips
but not at rest
a tight caress
that stalks in wait
proxy to the prey

let go of the blue
constantly hidden and true
there are too many hills
left to climb
leave all the windmills
behind

let go of the guilt
that your heart is too big
I know it sees too
I'm just a guest visiting
borrowing
your smile just like glue

(mending wings
and severed strings
petal and root)

let go of wet salt
it cannot be your fault
that you shelter our hopes
we come mere vessels
weak and effervescent;
we leave complete with a soul