Breathe in
Space out
Speak soft  
Think loud

How morbidly cruel we humans are
To have deemed the cherry red rose
Slashed of its life and rid of its thorns
As the purest symbol of love

Cold, frosty, blue lips
Seem more capable of warmth
Than her ice, blue heart

I miss the old winters
That warmed up my soul
As a kid, I'd drink cocoa
Coming in from the cold

I could sit by the fire
Mittens drying nearby
I'd watch my brothers sleep
As I made up lullabies

Papa would tell us stories
Like how his cat once flew to mars,
Or how he stole our grand mama
When fighting in a bar

I'd then make up an adventure
Of when we would be all grown
How we'd be the best of friends
And together we'd share a big home

I miss those old heartfelt winters
That held nothing but beautiful glow
But the fire has long turned to ashes
And the house is empty and cold

I place my gloves on the table
Boiling a warm *** of tea
The radio blasts to cover the sound
Of the silence that always haunts me

Recall the past
Refill the glass
Relive his lust
Regret his touch
Return to life
Remember strife
Regain your loss
Retrain your thoughts
Release all stress
Redeem all left

Reveal the fear...

Recall the past
Refill the glass
Remember life
Regret all strife
Regain your drink
Realize; rethink...

Recall the past
Spill out the glass
Think of his lust
Hold back his touch
Make most of life
Be rid of strife
Though full of loss
Think happy thoughts
Always battle the stress
But have some hope left

And no longer hold fear

I know how it sounds
When your eyes do abound
On these pages of mine
Where you read my thoughts cry
Since I say I'm okay
Though ruled by Anxiety
A Monarchy of despair
But I'd hate to reside where
Emotions lead down a path
Where I cry and then laugh
I promise that I'm all good
Things are just as they should
Karma's taken its toll
On my sin bearing soul
And I'm calm with my fate
But I do fücking hate
When the people around me
Are falling and drowning
And I can't do a thing.

I've been hit by Life
She's ran me over twice;
Sometimes she can be nice,
A friend you call for free food.
But most of the time, it seems
She's that crazy ex outside your house
Wielding a blowtorch
Begging for you to make a wrong move

We all go blind, sometimes
To beauty in our life.
I swore as a kid I never would,
Not like those grumpy adults do.
But here I am, blind as a bat
And trying to run through life.

I'm blind to my friends who only wish me happiness.
I'm blind to my world filled with the brightest colors.
I'm blind to the boy who's asked gently for my heart.

I know that I need to move on
From my darkened past,
*But moving past hell is hard, you know?

You gave me your word.
Held me tight, I gave my trust.
In flames, I now lay.

Oh Holy Agony- how do you bear
To watch the screaming souls
Fight against your poison laced binds.
Oh Holy Agony- where is your heart,
Us pitiful humans you feast upon
Need not to submerge in your wrath.
Oh Holy Agony- why hath you not perished,
Deep in your ***** I've thrusted my knife
But death did not take you for good company.
Oh Holy Agony- you savagely resuscitated,
Crawling out the Fiery depths of Hell
To disrupt my ephemeral serenity.

Weave me blue blanket of lies
Made from young virtuous lamb,
Forevermore, my comfort to keep.
Diminutive truths bearing no power
Mixed within sweet fallacy threads
Create this masterpiece I hold so dear.
Chamomile brewing late into the night,
Screaming black kettle boils over the edge
And sizzling snaps trail quickly after.
Duvet released my hand reaches forth,
Blindly scraping left arm on hot stove.
Howls, yelps, screeches of pain fly out my lungs,
Loud enough for Lupa, Achos, and Ania
To gaily dance amidst- my guttural cries as melody.
Ice pressed against my torrid flesh
I grasp the blue cloth of lambskin,
My defense against harsh actuality.
Fraudulent bliss a path often chosen,
Tis the blind man's way of life,
So a blind man is what I shall be.

Snared upon a rusted hook
A hook that's known as Doubt
Deep in my skin
It stays within
As blood slowly seeps out

Thrashing against it's tangled hold
Is how I used to fight
But now I lay
In disarray
Sinking deeper into my plight

Closing my eyes I hear them well
The words they screeched and sang
Fatty, ******
Liar, Doozy
Deep in my mind these rang

I'm tired of my empty shell
Their opinions are quite right
I'm finally done
My demons won
I'll forever be out of your sight

I feel like I've lost all my toes
and smell has run from my nose.
Pink lips turned blue,
Which is what lips do,
When I've fallen deep into snow!

A swarm of baby snowflakes
Paraded merrily into my backyard today.
I flew outside at the sight of their arrival, barefoot
To enjoy their cool company
Before they decided to travel elsewhere.
They nibbled and tickled me
Upon my bare arms and pink cheeks
Causing me to spin in place
twirling, laughing at the shimmery grey sky
That they call home.
And it could have been the fever
that gave me those euphoric feelings,
But more likely than not
I had found a sliver of my heart again.

Alone, 5 letters
To some it's just a small word
For others it's life

I will not take a bite,
Unless all buffalo can sing!
I wont nibble a piece,
Unless I meet a spoon named Ching!
I refuse to eat this stuff
Unless you fly me to the moon,
In a black and silver limo
Before the clock strikes noon!
Unless you preform the impossible
Though I would't hold my breathe...
I will not eat these veggies,
I would rather starve to death!!!

On the last day we spoke, you compared me to a 1000 piece puzzle.

One of those puzzles in which half is made up of a pretty blue sky, with big poofy clouds.

The other half is a plain field of grass.

You also compared me to a colorful rubix cube, the sparkly ones to be exact.

My unique and confusing disarray of color patterns make me approachable.

You said all this is the perspective
that while I'm interesting at first glance, no one wants to stick around long enough to solve me.

I never would of thought that a loss of a poets friendship would be harshest of all.

I guess I should have known.

Oh the fun we will have
Now that you're lying here
Paralyzed by my tea 
You have nothing to fear.
Please, give me your wrist.
Now thats a good boy,
I'll tie you up nice and tight
So that you I'll enjoy.
Don't cry tears my dear
I promise you I won't leave,
Just need to get the duct tape
I don't want to hear you scream.
Oh dear this simply won't do
I need to take off your clothes
Now don't you squiggle too much
Or I might just bite off your nose
My darling you needn't be shy!
Your body's a beautiful thing,
I promise my hand will be kind to you
Since you were so kind to me.
Darling your pose is perfect!
Now is most definitely the time.
For what you most likely wonder,
*To stuff you and make you mine.

I love you, said the boy
Watching his brothers nap
I love you, said the girl
Rocking her pup on her lap
I love you, said the movie
That two people watched for kicks
I love you, said the man
As he gently kissed her lips
I love you, said the woman
While she nibbled on his ears
I love you, said the father
Giving his daughter away in tears
I love you, said the dad
To his newborn baby girl
I love you, said the mom
Who had all the love in the world

Panda woman, that is me
Wears a mask and is chubby
Climbing up a bamboo tree

They say that laughter's the best medicine

They say big feet on man means big ****

They say Donald Trump's going to end the world

They say when life gives lemons, make lemonade

They say hope breeds eternal misery

They say happy wife happy life, happy girl happy world

They say you don't know what you got till it's gone

I say, who the heck is they?

My mind keeps forgetting
how to breathe right
For while others air go
In and out
out and in
In a simple function of normality
Mine falters a lot of the time

Turns my voice into wheezing gasps
The dead could speak better than I
My lungs squish into a tiny box
In the center of my chest
Causing a volcanic eruption of pain

It is a very similar feeling to my heart
Which thumps and clamors
At a speed unknown to humanity
The pace of a jackrabbit heart
whose cotton little tail's on fire
Until it simply feels like it
**pops

Fair to the broken
Who through mankind have been slain
She make's them all pay

There was a small frog
Splayed out on a zoo log
Its name was something-dog

I think it was dead
It didn't move its head
Nor blink its eyes instead

It was kinda cute
Though in death it was mute
So a picture of it I did shoot

A girl my age shoved past
Looked into the foggy zoo glass
To see the amphibious class

She called it lazy
Said the frog was **** ugly
Then left to see cuter things

Dead or simply asleep
Cute or a slimy creep
Who thought about frogs so deep?

I found a dead daisy yesterday

Its petals were browning and flat.

No longer pretty, you say?

Well I think it's beautiful like that...

A kiss on the cheek
A kiss on bare lips
A kiss on the nose
A kiss on bare hips

One kiss to a girl
One kiss to a boy
One kiss to a dog
One kiss to a stuffed toy

Kisses on rooftops
Kisses on beds
Kisses on tiptoes
Kisses thought out in heads

An addict for sure
Is what I must be
For I love me some kisses
And some kisses love me

I no longer question
The way of this world
Not that I would want to anyhow

I no longer ask
Why beggars are scorned and ignored
Even the children younger than me

I no longer ask
About Mermaids and Fairies and Elves
Nor the werewolves and vampires

I no longer ask
Where the sun and the moon came from
Or if the angels live on clouds

I no longer question
The way of this world
Not the questions that matter, at least

Sunken eyes, minds and hearts
of even the strongest souls
have drowned in the Sea of Calamity.
Their last rational thought being
*Where did it all go wrong?

Crayon wax woman
Dripping blue irises fall
On peach circle cheeks

One mug- earth
2 tablespoons Cocoa mix- people
1 cup boiled water- society
1 mini marshmallow- me**

1. Place the mix inside of the mug.

2. Pour the water into the mug, and mix it until the cocoa is completely dissolved.

3. Drop in the marshmallow, and continuously dunk it into the scorching hot water until it dissolves.

4. Enjoy perfection!

Icy Winds of Lost Friendships
Surround my Soul Today
I Used to Count,
All my Friends on One Hand
But I Pushed All But One Far Away
Off the Bridge of Love and Respect
Is Where I Threw Them Out
No More Simple Humans
To Care About Me
Im Fine, Without a Doubt

A snowflake kissed me
Upon my bright cherry cheeks
The softest kisses

Tried to fly away
Off the cliff, into the wind
A world without pain

The most common lie
That has tumbled off my tongue
**Im tired, thats all

My trust is just like a tree
Who with time becomes large and green
And you were the man
With saw in your hand
Slashing me to fallen history

Blood boils hot in my veins
Begging for a release of this pain
I see your face wearing a grin
Its about time I wiped it away
Fists up, sloppy right hook
But still I stand my ground
I'm not backing down
Not now or ever again

You shout and yell
try to make me afraid
But I stay standing still
silent and brave
Im winning this round today

We all do know this is true

That life one day we must leave

By a gruesome unwilling way

Or by the time of aging naturally

But the thing I must now implore

Is your thoughts on a life after this

As I lay unmoving in my stony grave

Will my soul feel as if it's amiss?

So mermaids, humans, elven and wolves

Please give me a piece of your time

What do you think become's of our souls

While our bodies rest buried beneath lime

Crosshatched tower of black ropes
Spiral towards poofy marshmallow clouds
A tempation for each passing youth
To gather around in crowds
All together the creatures, they climb
Grasping rope and some stranger's limb
Bodies fall to the earth like potato sacks
No limits in order to win...

Bountiful bunches of baby beliefs
Flutter freely and flawlessly off frigid folios
To lavish lands where little logic is left
An alluring and angelic archipelago
In which wonderfully written words will make their whereabouts

I asked you as a child

a very long time ago

If I left without a goodbye,

Would you let tears flow?

You held me tightly to your chest

Rocked me slowly back and forth

You promised me you'd never leave

I believed you, for all thats it's worth

I had a thought
A deep little thought
Some intruiging thought
The most beautiful thought

but then I forgot...