If you had diarrhoea got caught short, took a **** in that drawer where you keep all your cables and bits tangled vociferously then later discovered you needed a spare micro usb, so you had no choice but to roll up your sleeves, that would be this Monday
you took my hat off and wore it it looked better on you you took my shoelaces and tied them around your wrists like bracelets i wanted to hold your hands
you showed me your poem something a little dark, but i liked it and you always tell me what book you're reading you tell me to watch your favorite animes even though it's been years since i've watched anything at all i watch them all as if they will show me the world through your eyes
i thought i was special but i learned you do that with everyone you told me a list of her favorite anime characters from memory you told everyone in ap government the books you were reading
my shoelaces weren't even the only ones you stole i wish i could stop pretending i mean something to you
i wish i meant something to you
u can't just give me a beaded ring and expect me not to fall in love with you, *******
I want to climb every step to the rooftop of the tallest building i can find - and shout "YOU DO NOT DEFINE ME!"
I want to laugh in the face of the chemicals in my brain whose job everyday is to convince me that i am unbalanced.
I want to stand tall and continue living my life in plain view of the people who tried to keep me down.
For every 1 moment that I feel better There are 15 more where my hands shake for no reason or I get so overwhelmed that I literally force quit my existence Forcefully shut off my brain continue to find peace in the chaos.
I climb the steps to reach the top to yell from the roof tops But for every day that passes 2 floors are added to the top
I see blood on the walls. Tears falling down like rain. Everyday I think about you even when its part of pain. 3, 2, 1.. I hate you. I never wanna see you. You know what, I wish I never met you! 1, 2, 3.. I love you. I miss you. Can't wait to see you! 3, 2, 1.. It's happening again isn't it? I wonder if he loves me? Will he break my heart? 1, 2, 3 Oh god, not again.. I'm not good enough I will never love again.
I just realized how lonely i've been all my life. This **** kinda *****. Can't even get a bf irl is sad.. Ah, i hate my love life.
i am so exhausted of the cotidian the daily the unorthodox. i want to be afloat, no more of this suspended waiting no more of this nonsense. i want silence, not bliss, i want not the love but a mere kiss, a breath of air inspired into my throat warmly. i want too much already... a little more sleep a little more warmth PATIENCE or, maybe death.
~ if you knew the sun would never rise again would you love me then? ~ could we be together forever if forever was only tonight? ~ if it all meant nothing would i be your everything then? ~ if you knew it was the last time would you say goodbye? ~ or would you stay then, until the end? ~