The reason I called at 12:14 am
Was not for casual small talk,
Or chit chat about the day,
Or even because I missed you.
It’s because I’m trying to fill my empty satisfactions.
The reason I text you back at any time in the day
Is not to check up on you,
Or to be with you,
Or even because I care about you.
It’s because I’m trying to fill my time.
I’m using you,
The reason I reach out to you
Is not because “I still love you”,
Or to have and to hold you,
Or even because I, dare I say, miss you.
It’s because you’re so convenient.
Wanna know something even sicker than the latter?
I know that I’m using you,
I know that I’m some sadistic girl,
I know that I’m some kind of a messed up human.
The reason I lead you on
Is not because “I want you so bad”,
Or that I can only contract at the thought of you,
Or even because I desire only you.
It’s because you’re so easy.
The thing is:
I love it.
I love using you.
Frankly, It would be quite rude not to.
You’re just temporary,
Every breath you take is because I gave it to you,
Every step you take is because I showed it to you,
I created you.
I am your Goddess.
(When you think you’re a God.)
Silly me, silly you,
To think you would own me.
To think we’re in love.
But we know better than that.
We know that you’re just a temporary fix to a bigger appetite.
Let’s not think about that.
Let’s be silly,
Let’s be stupid,
Let’s be ignorant kids trying to love.