Keep an eye out for her,
she tends to disappear
intermittently, leaving no
note for one to know,
as to where she is going
and if she'll be showing
up for supper that day,
or in the dark, wander away.
But soon she will map
her way back to your lap
timidly, in need for a warm,
caring body to conform.
She likes to play with things,
but often her mood swings.
To hurt is not her intention,
all she wants is your attention,
and if you give your love to her,
she’ll not smile but perhaps purr.
I didn’t ask to be assaulted with words
When you knew all too well that there was more than 15 bottles in my system
And my feet couldn’t find a way to walk a straight line.
“You only say ‘I love you’ when you’re drunk.”
I forced my drooping eyelids open to look at you
And I wanted to laugh.
It was past 2am on a Friday and I was lying down on my threadbare sofa
Your hands pushing a bucket towards me because you know me
You know me too well.
You know that on Thursdays the commute home was faster and the jeep would drop me off by the bar a street down from my cruddy apartment.
You know that I like this denim jacket you have because it has a pizza stitched onto it.
You know that my wallet is practically begging me to stop at the third shot but my heart won’t have any of it.
You know that no matter what, I will dance to Pussycat Dolls whenever they come on, even if I’m in the most contaminated restroom to exist.
But you don’t know
Of the way my head screams over the pounding of the music whenever you say her name.
Of the words that get stuck in my throat every single time you close the door behind you.
Of the times I wanted to know what it was like to have you near me when I wake up.
Of how I wanted to sing the cheesiest songs to you in the karaoke room.
Of how I closed my eyes in the presence of the night stars when I could hear how happy you were.
Sometimes my mind wanders to the thought of your lips on mine and your hands on my spine
But I remember that you said that she tasted like a fallen heaven
And I remember that I must taste like the loneliness of rain
You know that I fill in the gaps of my life with paint splatters in the colors of the sea
You know that there are tunes I will remember even when I’ve long forgotten the words
You know how my smile barely ever reaches my eyes
You know who I am.
Who am I anyways?
The sober girl who knows
That the only time I can hold your hand
Is when I get drunk enough to say “I love you”
So I say it again and again and again.
Because now you will laugh it off and say I’m drunk
Because you will forget about it the next day
Because when I’m sober
I can look at you with clear eyes and know
That you only say “I love you” when I’m drunk.
my eyes wander to people
and i think
does anybody really know
who do you think you are
walking this fragile earth
and preaching the lies of centuries
telling the people of a treachery
you rely the world on this feeling
when it is nothing but fleeting in a world of change
you think that this is salvation
when it will abandon you
because this is far too human
too sweet in the mornings
all coffee and sunlight and soft music
and too bitter in the moonlight
all scratches on skin and empty screams and tears
all too human
that in every day it morphs into something unfamiliar
this feeling we hold so high
this feeling we crave to drown in
and the centuries that we have wasted in search of such
we were blind to the real force that pushes us over the edge
we have denied ourselves the truth for the longest time
it is now that we need to see
that this world does not allow for the existence of love
the very thing that wars were fought over and bonds were created
and it is only a passion that drives us
to our beginnings or to our ends
with (cosmic) glow
i hope You know the Light
You hOMe; Your heaven-sent
enzymes align to roam & tangle
with the roots of the ones that i own
your storms are divine, the rocks that
You climb are leading you to Love
from past dimensions of time
there is no thing to do
but to (Love) all
all You may do
so that some day that
force finds its way back to You
as it forms light from (tunes) that
You (sing) to the moon; it will
paint You with gold stars
that flow right (through)
You & the trees You
had bloomed in
the forrest of
You will all
 Set of earbuds. Black. Scratched and left to wither away.
 Dead pumpkins. Probably COD: baseball bat.
 Broken beer bottles. Some white, some amber, some still containing beer that has leeched into the cracks on the concrete.
 Acorns. I collected some for Mabon and Samhain. Some were close to shattering but aren't we all?
 Honey suckles that looked almost lavender. But they weren't.
[Too many] Different paths to go down.
Lonely is the day.
Lonely is the night
Weary is the wanders light.
Sad is the moments.
Sad is the dates.
Two souls fates.
Long is the weeks.
Long is the years
An ocean of tears.
Two paths will soon
Does love need a season?
The search is over.
The search is complete.
The wanders find a name.
But all they could ever leave behind
Was C+K carved in a tree.
A soul wandering, on unknown path,
Got myself under the piled wrath.
Unknown I was of my own destruction skills,
Finding bliss was my aim, so I took no. Of pills.
All I wanted to accomplish my dreams,
So I covered up my mouth and ate up my anxiety screams.
Wanted to fly high, so I started to crawl,
I didnt knew I was crawling against the squall.
Threw away hard, I picked up my shards,
In dilemma I was, what to do next now ? I dont want my dreams, my wishes to be in graveyard.
Craving for yet another magical happening, moving forward on unknown path,
Unknown of my needs, dynamic was my nature ;
So I kept burdening with loaths.
Now when I look back, I know what I needed,
I allure the way I bridged and struggled.
The things I kept within me,
Searched like a wanderer.