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Jul 7 · 42
Forever Busride
I never knew how you cared-and never felt so
Loved, until I found I was out of control and
Fell from up above. You don't deny me you,
I don't deny you me-and so elated was my
Heart when you sat ahead of my seat. I felt
That day the bus ride would never really
End, and something in me never knew
What lied around the bend.
Our sunshine fell from the sky like sparkling
Drops of dew, and when I see the golden
Flowers I always think of you. I feel
This love I have for you is very strong!
As you called for a stop 'cause you got
Sick-we were at the mission just past dawn.
Why when you got sick I fell in love I really
Cannot say, but then again that bus ride still
Continues to this day...
Jul 7 · 50
Getting close to escape, nearing the curb,
Sharp high heels, a statue silhouette,
She's daddies little girl, heavily insured,
Forget the pay day, "tough life regret."

She'll carry on, sit in a velvet chair,
Keep the rock solid cement stare,
Backed by societies interest air,
She'll pick up where daddy left off,
Even if he has to make it harder
If she chooses to follow here own path,
She'll be the spark, the fire starter,
On her way "nowhere," "gods own wrath."

She'll be a little princess, her training starts today,
Give them a dollar, she'll save it for a rainy day,
And the moment she "feels threatened" dad will pray,
It's just a hobby to force the jacket when she's cold,
To teach her she's got to wear pink, do as she's told.

Daddies given her everything, or she can be the one
Who holds the weight, she'll know she's been disowned,
She'll work off all of the hate-a silhouette-now all alone,
A marionette who's lost-strings-clipped-without a home.

Better off to be herself than living off of "humble pie" rich stash,
She'll be living a happy life, be herself, no strings attached...
Jul 7 · 50
All Hallows' Day
On my journey to the center of the world
Of phantoms dreams, I find all my thoughts with
Mysteries. The moon is shining bright and there
Must be a werewolf out tonight. In the dark I see
Ten people in white-a group of preachers, cursing the
Zombies, and I can also tell the vampires around
Every corner must be down below. Every night it's the
Same, the sanity of reason never seems to be
In anyone's brain...the full moon comes I hear
The wolfman call, this seems like a normal night
In fall, but then I can tell you it's just filled
With witches calls. They cook their roasts and cast
Bolts and hail, and I can hear them chant while I'm
On the speeding city Light Rail.
Jul 7 · 27
Super Shakes
Met with strange fate
I go to Supershakes,
And order a chill burger
With a tall fry guy and a bake.
Then there you are sitting,
Your hair down to your arms
Golden like honey and blowing
Long in the wind...
But I have other places I eat at
Yet how can I resist this "diet sin?"
I know I'll want to dine everywhere,
So now I am at a loss?
I'll try to find you anyhow,
It's this control over me you've got!
Jul 7 · 40
Into Everything
Life is that which is all
When set aside pain and
Pleasure, loss and gain,
Taking passage into a dream,
And finding the magic, in awe of
Everything just beyond the sight
And lose all fear and float into the light.
Jul 7 · 55
Lake of Dreams
With the sun
The fire spirits
Bring amber hues
Golden and applied
To a weathered canvas
In the deep blue water
Floating in pools
Of violet and marine
Evermore fulfilling
Evaporating then only
Descending into the
Emerald green
And soft grass
Holding flowers
Giving them
A cordial of life
With her laughter
Echoing afar.
Jul 7 · 62
Cloudy Venture
Pineapple topped beach palms are tall in the clouds,
Echoes of bells tones trail in the sky so dark blue.
The sun is liquid honey, with a golden candy coating,
It is now that I look up and see my red balloon.

A song of harmonic laughter is full in the air,
Up it floats into adventurous magical territories,
Mythic beasts and sprites follow on clouds and stare,
Ticker-tape string trailing, windy chimed melodies.

The chalk of clouds are pillows filling the sky,
Darker and suspended in mid-animation, dimming.
The balloon floats still-ever higher in the light,
Lighter than ever, above the earth still spinning...
Jul 7 · 40
Forever In A Kiss
The golden sunlight shone
Bright over the hill
As the wind fills the
Air with flower petals.
A single drop of dew
Falls onto a dandelion
Growing in a field
And settles.
I gaze deeply
Into your eyes then we kiss
Slowly, our hearts
Beating fast.
I take your hand
Walking onward in the
Grassy field as we go on
Forever, and we never look back.
Jul 7 · 49
Into The Light
Windy torrents of water and thunders echo
against a silent brown house,
It's large grey doors open, shrill voices sing,
chandeliers burn...
more sounds are heard outside, like a wailing.
chandeliers burning the ceiling...
statue wax ivory figures melt, burning in their
passion, melting turned violet red they have become
hopeful, promises of painless joys, power over
wars, famine, disease and all things of darkness
are whispered in hushed "sincerity and truth"
but still vague and opaque.
Even now a banging of hail, leaves upon a pane
all the doors blow open now
and with a shriek all of wind in the drops are
scattered drenching, so even the mid morning rain
can still drip earth upon the clear white figures
revealing their true origin
rendered **** by what once made them.
Jul 1 · 93
Going Places
So I've been going this way or that,
"Searching for someone with the answers,"
All my life I've simply been searching for a
Simple path, of trails that can lead you to realistic love,
Beggars can't be choosers, winners won't be losers,
We're all here for the same reasons, under the same sun,
Different homes-with different worlds we come from.

So we're all human beings, a great big human race,
A family of love that keeps building walls
And finding wars that just pop up
From out of the dark for someone's
Fear or another person's hate.

I've given in to temptation by your ideals,
Sure!  Given the moment I'd try my fate
With lady luck!
My only question isn't where did this all
Come from, but instead-how does it all add up?
Feb 27 · 4.0k
100 Muppet Tears
Alan S Bailey Feb 27
To the tune of Five For Fighting's "100 Years to Live"

From "Frogs For Fighting"
Kermit Sings:

I'm just a simple green Muppet,
Good old friends with Scooter and Fuzzy,
And I'm small and skinny,
A quiet frog that's on the roam.

Animal's clearing out the whole fridge,
There's a Muppet chef inside the kitchen,
Making gibberish sounds,
Boiling a goose or baking rolls.

Piggy I'm alright with you,
No other Muppet pig will do,
MRS. PIGGY-there's never a wish better than this,
When you've got a hundred Muppet Tears TO GIVE...

I'm searching stars at the moment,
Still the frog-I'm just in love with a pig,
Dream of a connection,
A constellation for a sign,

Count goes "AH AH AH" when counting,
Cookie Monster's nomming on the cookies,
Snuffleupagus sounds like he just might have a cold...

But Piggy I'm alright with you,
You've got much might-no one can kick **** quite like you...

But piggy I'm OK with you,
MRS. PIGGY-there's never a wish better than this,
When you've got a hundred Muppet Tears TO GIVE...

Through a small Muppet's eyes
Can tell you no lies,
Bunson's Lab-a surprise,
Madness, havoc explode,
Beaker's running to hide,
We're moving on...

I'm feeling light at the moment,
Small as can be-the sky-all I view,
And I'm just reeling,
High up in the clouds-a message in blue,  
...Mrs. Piggy I'm alright with you,
You're black belt in Karate and Kung Fu,
Super Grover's on his way,
Every Muppet has their dog day...


Piggy I'm alright with you,
There's no other Muppet pig like you,
MRS. PIGGY, there's never a wish-better than this...

When you've got a hundred Muppet Tears TO GIVE...
Sang to the tune of 100 Years to Live by Five For Fighting.

Frog's For Fighting, 100 Muppet Tears To Give.

"Well, no KIDDING Mrs. PIGGING!"
Alan S Bailey Dec 2018
Look up: "Superman" by Five For Fighting.

Kermit sings music by a Muppet Band called Frog's For Fighting...! "It's Not Easy To Be Green, I Can't Stand When High"

I can't stand when high,
I'm not that naive...
I'm just out to find the better part of green,
I'm more than a bird, I'm more than a bear,
I'm more than some-frog in piggy's underwear,

And it's not easy-to be-e-green...

Wish that I was high, ****** and half asleep,
Find a way to lie-about my *** on Sesame Street,
It may sound absurd, but don't be naive,
Even Muppets have the right to green,
I may be disturbed, but won't you concede,
Even Muppets croak upon Skunk-****,

And it's not easy-to be-e-green...

Once again-I'm small-I'm small and GREEN, well it's
Alright! We can all get "stoked" tonight, and I'm not
Blazing...or anything.

I can't stand when high...I'm not that naive,
Bud just gets ya fried, on brownies buzzed on ****!

I'm only a frog on Jim Hensen's knee,
Wearing pink lingerie on this one way street,
I'm only a frog on Jim Hensen's knee-looking for
Older guys who flirt with me
who flirt with me...yea, who
Flirt with me...who FLIRT WITH ME...

I'm only a frog that's diggin' the green,
I'm only a  frog on kronic seven leaves,
I'm only a frog that's puffin' on green, and it's not easy...'s not easy to be-e

This is a spoof on Kermit getting high on *** and then cross dressing, don't forget comedy, so if you are in the mood to laugh, good fun!
Dec 2018 · 529
Forgotten Me
Alan S Bailey Dec 2018
You may never love me
I wonder what to do,
I'll be at the end of the tunnel waiting
But I might never be with you.

This is a sad day for me,
It's already time to go to bed,
I can't think of a worse hell
Than trying to get you out of my head.

N+A for never...
To Nikki, wherever you may be
Nov 2018 · 759
Alan S Bailey Nov 2018
Just in for this season, darkness and light
They cascade over the hillside, that drown in
Moonlight. The jewels that fill the sky are
Scattered remnants of a pretty dream, one
That apparently won't come true. This is the
Meaning, never use the words "I do," unless
You really know you're ready to.
Nov 2018 · 222
the other side
Alan S Bailey Nov 2018
Without the scientifically intangible, we will never know
The true value of creativity. Once you see beyond,
Where we will all go, you will lose yourself in the eyes
That glow, you see yourself thus reflected in the driven snow.

See how I'll get lost in this game! I can't complain,
Chances are there isn't much time for me,
There is a whole world of trouble after I am free,
But then again wouldn't there always be?

So I float here suspended in this state I arise...whilst
Burnt coffee grind's smell wakes me, I will never again
See the other side until I go back and close my eyes.
Nov 2018 · 908
This Dark Path
Alan S Bailey Nov 2018
Various things surround in this dark room...
lost in the buzz of the whirring fan motion.
It slowly draws one into trance state, I'm like a
glow in the dark skeleton, silent darkness, and so on.
The forest path that guides us to a clearing,
whispered hushes and quiet anticipation
of the next story to be told, going from
one to another, a bead, white gold.
Starry skies endowed with crystal droplets cloud,
the moons face in the misty shroud. Woven by the hands
or fate, this way or that, the future can not wait.
Whatever this is become now, please love, set me free.

From some spell, life has changed. The darkness used to scare me.
Sep 2018 · 2.8k
My Real Problem (All Along)
Alan S Bailey Sep 2018
It doesn't really change anything,
regularly I would despise the work of this poem,
the sight of blank paper is easy to fill,
but it's such a pain when at a pointless window sill.

I vaguely recall when I lived in joy,
Now people see me I'm lost in my thoughts,
Everyone thinks that I don't want to listen,
But the truth is that money has always been my problem.
I know this is not a fun poem, but I may one day find reason to express  my happy time feelings sometime soon
Aug 2018 · 1.7k
Another day with(out) you
Alan S Bailey Aug 2018
This is the other side of sanity!
I think to myself,
a riddle in the middle of chastity, vanity?
what is it that I have to say?
Is this not another day or is it a play?
Vaguely we are tossed into this
post hence I have seen the other side-
this day with you...this day that never came.
I will not be able to tell the difference of pleasure
or pain.

I am still lost dreaming on to the memory,
you stood there in the middle of high school square
doe-eyes intent, hidden behind you're intense
endless hidden truth, your boyish youth.

A dream of gazing into those eyes some day,
I never wanted to say goodbye or go away,
this world carried me to the "other side" and it was
"too late," I was unable to "succeed." Who am I
to seek this "other side?" In the sky?
What we never do? Call this "side" what you will,
but in the end I would have gladly battled madly
through hell for a chance to share your world with you.

Oh, here I go again, blithering sadness, sad poem!
Look to the skies when you're alone, then maybe
on the clearest of nights when this whole world
they've built of stone is gone you will finally find out
how beautiful you are so.
Even if I never got to see you understand this or
spend another day with(out) are all
I can't get off my mind no matter how hard I try
I will continue to see you can't forget you
Even in my wildest
Jul 2018 · 302
Signs of Crimes
Alan S Bailey Jul 2018
So I say swear words or kick back,
You interrogate me like I might be on crack,
Let me tell you, you **** for a living,
And you guys inherit the world from
Humble men, decent guns, and at 100 yards
Can shoot the unarmed in the head whilst
Driving at 85 mph swerving down a
Road. I swear, oh well. (guilt)
This must be a sign of the times!
Swearing! I guess that it's truth,
When it comes down to it we're devils
All the worse
With each of your crimes.
May 2018 · 244
Alan S Bailey May 2018
I would add so much to this
With my creative essence providing
Some sort of balance to my aim,
Finding a way to inspire and entertain.
***** that lets just entertain for monetary gain.
Insane whilst filling adding excess facts into your brain.
Mar 2018 · 545
Alan S Bailey Mar 2018
You hold me in your arms and caress
My hair, I feel so soft as a feather, I grasp
At your short dark light and smooth.
Until you are kissing my neck, you move
Along so graceful, playful-wild-all that you do.
You hold me so close, I feel as if I am lost
In the world of natural love, like there is
A never-ending supply, gold from the skies above.

In time I am rocked back and forth between
The ebbing tide like a flow of water from the sea
Is holding me. It keeps me in a form of motion
Not unlike I am a boat and your arms are the sea.
Visuals aren't needed, this is all I feel and all I see.
We are sitting there in the green green grass,
It's a beautiful warm day, all sunshine and soft rain,
As if it was brought about from a world so divine.
We will forever be in this place...we'll always stay.
It's always 1989...always 1989...
Mar 2018 · 184
Pain Killer
Alan S Bailey Mar 2018
All of the sparkle and sweet
And joy in the world is like
Any pain killer,
It's wrapped around all of
The endless misery and fear,
But still it's no way out for life,
Empty space filler.
Mar 2018 · 284
At the golden shovel...
Alan S Bailey Mar 2018
Such faded tracks that tell of all our special needy things
These ever needed-ever traded blanket things
They gave us this under cloaked shawl
And disappear into the wilderness. Why?
Because you feel warm? Your giving light beckons all...?
The drab dulls and grays that welcome you into home square,
The spider web in the loft of the ever white inn house,
This is how we are in for living now.
Give me a shovel "I would" dig to Hell's Inferno well,
OK, now you're there, but gold you see is not in there, yea,
It's like they say in the early retirement way day to day,
Your only too old when you can't come out and play!
These questions, unveiling,  appearing from the balcony,
She is in the well made protection for one of small size.
This is all in pure need, we are all in need,
The whole world is in need. Let us need
Until at our enemy necks, with knife and pistol,
Let us need until we must be bitter for the water glass
Is never half full. Let us be in need until we find
That this is how real life was already best destined to be,
Still with empty pockets ever in need of more,
Just keep digging deeper for more anyhow.
Getting even no matter who died was still a must,
All bought with a few million lives.

In God WE Trust...
Jan 2018 · 375
Constellation Star
Alan S Bailey Jan 2018
I remember sitting on the auditorium
Floor, when I saw you-dark sparkling eyes,
Like a bird, looking at me, short hair,
I remember how I felt entranced,
Like a deer startled in the middle of
A field. You know that my mind stays there
Forever lost in this memory of happenstance.

You just stared at me. We never really spoke,
When your friends asked me why I always
Followed you around even though you didn't
Like me, you sat there with pen in hand
"click click-click click" it went, there I sat
At the library table, I could dare not
Look, but I knew even near you I felt grand.

It's like you cast this spell on me, and if I could
Answer, you are my strongest inspiration,
it was enough to let you be, to observe
Your great beauty even from a distance like a star
Shining in the Capricorn constellation. I'd wait,
No matter how long, near or far. To think I would
Never share life with you? But maybe some day I will be
An innocent Virgo star shining right by where you are.
Jan 2018 · 390
Part of Yourself
Alan S Bailey Jan 2018
Sometimes, the people who make
The best actors work at
High salary jobs, usually
Being a "too good to be true" success,
Forget about being who you are,
And you can make a whole lot,
But you lose a part of yourself
In the process...

Who cares! It was all worth it,
Hunny bunny!
I'm not dissing high salary jobs, just said sometimes, it's not always truth the job makes one forget the self, but when it is it can be very wrong indeed.
Jan 2018 · 248
Haiku-So This Is It
Alan S Bailey Jan 2018
Clearly I recall
the value "it" already made
for me so I know.
Dec 2017 · 314
Alan S Bailey Dec 2017
So we're all doing "better..."
I ponder this as I go over all of our
Future life "perfections,"
War is ten times more ******
And violent than ever before.
If that's not enough, we deny
The loss of every day for people
Who go do boring, dead end
(Life is very short, so why not
Spend each day mopping floors
And filling out orders for life!
As if that isn't a tragedy,
A wonder as it is, the political
Playground is a wonderland
With the most immature
President in history now in
Charge, people pretend we'll
Somehow survive, his agenda
To remove, to dispose of
Anything or anyone he deems
To be "at large." If anyone
Loves immigrants, they are
Stupid, insane, and lack any
Integrity. If you don't work
And have a car, even if you're
Disabled, you're a "waste of human
Space," to be guilt trip prone,
Ridiculed, no excuse, a total pity.

Well we certainly fixed this life up!
And left the rest of the world in the dust...
Nov 2017 · 257
Growing up fast-privileged
Alan S Bailey Nov 2017
Where the road ends and meets the future
I shall be here at the burnt out screen cross point,
Even when all breaks apart and you have no one
I will be there to keep a well lit joint!
If you are somewhere else and this is bothering you
Somehow, that I am OK with ****, grow up dipstick,
It's past the year 2015,
It's lately been OK with that stuff now.
Growing up fast on this big kid playground,
You throw a stick and it lands a gun on the ground,
Where it's totally uncool to be part of BLM,
But confederate flags, statues, Dukes,
And "privileged" are the new trend.
That's just how we all grew up fast all around!
On this endlessly changing, re-arranging
Educating, violent, strange place Mom, Dad, you-and-I roam,
This special little USA place full of haters we all call home.
Nov 2017 · 209
Untitled "E" for effort
Alan S Bailey Nov 2017
I normally like to write poetry
When someone just might read,
I normally like to feel wanted
When all I really do is dream.
So who cares what I think,
This poem will be short lived,
But that is because I guess we all
Know I STINK...

Well, I guess for this poem I deserve an E!
Going nowhere, fast...just because they're jealous. What else is new?!?
Oct 2017 · 271
Untitled Goodbye-Your Eyes
Alan S Bailey Oct 2017
Ever since you left me alone by phone
Saying goodbye I haven't been the same,
In your endless dark eyes
That would glow with so much light
You left me without a lit candle
Lost in the darkest plight.
Yours were the softest small hands,
And your short brown hair so bouncy
With a playful touch to all the strands,
And such beautiful boyish eyes,
I could see a lot of tenderness in them.
But you left me in the dark, here,
To play a dismal part, desperate for love,
Whether you were far or near,
You were like sunshine I longed for,
But I never received your warmth.
This is now my darkest hour,
Watch as I am taken down by this storm,
You stand there from a distance, it's not
Unlike watching someone get banished
Without a trace, longing for one chance
To for once even look at your smooth
***** face. But your visage so sweet
Was but an idea, more like a dream,
So when or if I wake up...*

I will still never again be free.
Oct 2017 · 200
Alan S Bailey Oct 2017
Emotions, words, ideas, feelings*
We live in a time period where
We shoot ourselves in the foot
Stating how a person feels.
This is it, we are all being mind
Controlled, forced into trusting
That everyone is perfectly fine.
This is your life now, if you don't
Feel everything is fine, you're
Completely out of line...
Good luck finding what is left of
Your actual rights, even in your heart.
They were on it right from the start,
When being in charge of your life
Meant saying what you don't believe,
Because you're no longer needed
So long as you are not what they
Now perceive as a beautiful thing
Because you don't fit in with the public's
Current popular day dream.

Sell out-and you will be a big "success,"
Don't want to become a living lie...? Goodbye...
Aug 2017 · 347
Alan S Bailey Aug 2017
I have never tried harder in my life
Just to accomplish the so-called "easy,"
This world is so full of hate and violence,
Why can't we ever believe in making things
The way that they are meant to be?

I've been doing the same things for years
I guess I still **** at "easy,"
I guess I wasted all of my years it seems,
Losing so much now, or they just want to
"Easily" overshadow you and me.
Jul 2017 · 266
"True" Stuff We Read
Alan S Bailey Jul 2017
If you read it from the ******* book it's
"True," not just for you, for me for everybody,
We're all just here to waste, make our own sole filthy space,
What you believe is always "truth for everyone" and not just you.
No matter what we say or think or feel or know or do.
Jul 2017 · 6.6k
This Endless Sky
Alan S Bailey Jul 2017
The past
It's always on my mind
The grassy backyard I grew up in
This and that-memories of
Halloween, rabbits, fall, you.
All the things that pass in time.
I pick up this notion that
One may recall what happened to
Them when they were a young kid.
The balloons touching the ceiling of
My pre-school, the quiet time when
We supposedly slept but never did.
Like the color yellow, how I loved it,
The '89 earthquake, being shocked by it.
Songs in Kindergarten. Art, pictures, music.
Summer camp, exploring the wild, love, light,
And wind. I remember my brother
And I playing tag as the sun went
Down in the first house I moved in.
Running along the fields in the day,
Swimming, or memories of the
Tumbleweeds performance,
Being In the play.
All of the times I would always
Watch the sun on the swing as it rose
In the morning. I remember the vast
Wheat fields, a sense of calm quiet,
As if there were no place more peaceful.
Climbing my favorite pine tree in my back yard.
But one thing I remember more than ever
Was being on a field of my own.
The sky is filled with clouds always
Floating off like they
Were from an endless world of tranquility,
This warm sun, this was and-I forever remember
It to be-my one true home.

But that is another story...
Well, at least I tried!
Jul 2017 · 282
To Escape (No Return)
Alan S Bailey Jul 2017
Always the flow of water-across muddy banks and
Passages into lakes filled with the essence of nature,
Pulling tides and the smell of alpine, hickory wood and
firn. Always the flow of life-ever passive, trance state,
Picking up speed it rushes, like the sound of blood rushing
Through the earths veins, towards endless vinyards and orchards,
Cascading over cliffs like sparkling mist, into ravines and it continues
On. Into the forest, into the pines and the sage brush-not thinking,
Quick to find solace in this mid-morning dew, this canopy, deer hide.
Continue to be cloaked by the grass and thistle, branches and vines,
Not stopping, ever residing in it-never looking back until reaching that
One point where it is certain that the past concrete, cement and steel,
Are but a thing of memories of tragic times to be kept so forever, never
Looking back, never to return or see them again until the very world ends.

Always the tide of stream water, endless in the universe, it's strength,
And it's endless source, that source, from which all life flows...
Jul 2017 · 3.4k
Regrets: Musical Spark
Alan S Bailey Jul 2017
Playing piano, it's like I have a treasure chest,
each time I hit a note it resonates
like unto a sparkling jewel in glittering crest.
If I had a song I could write that could
reveal and unravel, your true feelings expressed,
I would play it for you in these endless depths.
Surrounded by fear, loss and by worry,
You've left me in the endless circling spin,
I'm floating in an empty abyss, no hurry.
But one day when you find me in the dark,
hopefully there is enough light from a fading
chord that will grant you one last spark.

The glistening notes continue to play out forever in
the glittering starlit skies, accompanied by natural
hues, white gold moon, eyes, and darkness in disguise.
Jun 2017 · 3.6k
Regrets-Darkened Skies
Alan S Bailey Jun 2017
To be here, to be out of sight,
Until dawn comes, you blacken my sky,
You know that this is just another
Sad song, a "useless poem" of pain,
Another "lie," another somber "waste of space."

Well there is "hope" at the end of my tunnel,
Or is there? I gave up on this poem and that,
It all came out sad...much like the darkened
truth of my well worn path. This is the end,
Then there might just be you (my friend?)

No such thing as the word of peace,
This is it, will I wander out into the blank,
And pretend I can make it a simple world of
Joy, because that is what makes people clap?
Sorry, but I guess I had to be sarcastic,
This mouth of mine that always must flap.

*When was there a time when my peers didn't
Always get mad? It's become a common place truth,
I have no actual friends, gone my days of
Wild care-free youth, even school wasn't as
Bad as having to somehow live with you.
Regrets...regretting the fact that I said what I did, and how it will be the burning coal under my straw house, there will be no end to my regret.
Jun 2017 · 304
Stars-Where we're going
Alan S Bailey Jun 2017
A feeling, a thought, an idea,
Asking only what I must feel,
There is nothing here that's real.
This is the vague truth of my life,
Continue on like I never heal.

This is how everything always ends,
I hated to bring you down, your world,
Between the sips of a cold blue drink
On some hidden island with **** girls.

You can always live my dream,
I get the lonely stuffy room and plain meals,
Combined with the fact that they still
Aren't any consolation to how I feel.

And those who either romanticize it,
Those who won't share any space with me,
Or for those who want me to be a disgrace,
Those who want me to disappear someplace.

You're the one who brought me down,
Was it fun? Do you still get feelings of
Happy-go-lucky hate fuel watching me
Drowned? It'll end bad-when you're still around.

You'll be seeing stars for a long time.

*Just watch as the gold-white sun, moon, the very earth
Turns as bright, as colorful as the pain I feel,
In the end you'll have only days before an
End for this way of life, one that is truly unreal.
Alan S Bailey May 2017
Getting it all out 2

There is one thing that can not compare with the space that I call
my endless noise free affair.
It's simple, you get stuck here in this
judgement box, very little space, then cornered over someones personal
worries or whatever is really going on down there.

You see, I have this theory that most people are driven by one thing and one thing alone, the idea of hinting at
someones innermost secrets and only
concentrating on invading their own "guilty" space when they are finally home.

Yes, I "did it," whatever, I can never explain, you and your stupid doors,
you breath on them and it's ****** just the same. So much for just living life in peace, now we're just running to make sure that the creeps ***** rotten pervert lives are filled with ease!
Alan S Bailey May 2017
What would it be like to be in your arms?
How would I feel protected by your
Amazonian charms, for now only a time
Filled with worry, my darkest day,
I the song bird, long hair, big doe eyes,
Would you with your short dark raven red hair
Be able to hold me as close and not become
Lost along the way, become 'trapped' in the love
Or take off when we 'can't get any space'
Any other way? You always do remind me
Of a twin 'sister,' I your 'brother,' lost in each others
Complex similarities. You see the pieces are alike,
But when you think about the pieces,
The truth is there's no telling if I'll ever be
Close enough to explore these arms,
Your pizazz, your wild charms, so boyish, yet light.
I'll be waiting for you on the other side,
Where the colorful green grass meets what's
Now become of this endless wait,
This extremely dangerous, toilsome life.
May 2017 · 349
The Other Side-Stars
Alan S Bailey May 2017
This is it, the only way out,
Through the burrowed green freedom tunnel
Well-as I like to call it,
It's nearly ready! But still I have no idea
Just how much longer I can hold my
Breath, keep fail safe wit.
There is a way over to the other side,
It's just a little bit further.
If I play my cards right,
I'll be able to make it through alive,
Though in the end all I was in trouble
For was spilled milk and loose ends,
A broken youth and whatever you say
Goes, so I guess surviving or not,
It all depends.

*Welcome to seeing stars...
Apr 2017 · 723
Untitled-Fire In Your Eyes
Alan S Bailey Apr 2017
It's hard to believe that we were just
Feet away from each other at one time,
Your dark eyes and brown short hair,
Your soft voice, and my endless crying,
(Still in pain from that day you told me to
Go my own pointless separate way)
You and I, we hold each other so close
From such a great distance-in my mind.
It's just like they all say, love is burning,
My house is in a fire ablaze, I am so burnt up
Over you. I will watch as the skies set fire,
I will wait until it burns down every last
Square inch of this place of evil in it's entire.
There will be no end to my pain
Until this world ends or you and I are
Holding each other just the same!
Apr 2017 · 368
Never Going Back
Alan S Bailey Apr 2017
On the other side of the lakes edge
You might say it must be right
That when I throw a rock in the water,
The ripples touch the other side.

With light transparent patterns,
A spider weaves webs like silk,
Every strings placement matters
No matter a leaf or branches tilt.
So if you feel your being watched,
Ever think it might be so?
The spiral made from leaf to leaf
Catches rarities that come and go.

Just as I was thinking this,
I felt I was being watched,
As though someplace in my midst
The sound of footsteps stopped.
Searching for a picture of you as in vain,
I thought I heard you start to laugh,
Saw your raven hair so I flipped through again,
One thing I know is that we're never going back...
Alan S Bailey Apr 2017
So many times before I sat there watching
Waiting, vegetating, it's so aggravating,
Waiting for this hell to freeze over.
I am in an ice box, I guess that's good as long
As it's inside a place I live, because then at least
I get to pace around or dream as is.

You sit there patting me on the head like I'm a stupid dog,
"There there, you'll get over your dreams. We all had to
At one point."
I'm supposed to just sit here and feel golden,
This my darkest hour, the only thing I have left is that
I'm here where I can be a "pretty flower," but still I feel
I have no future with all of my dreams stolen.

I would give anything but to feel the fires of youth and life,
Now I get to be whatever else and poor as I am "free."

*One man's trash is another man's treasure, indeed...
Apr 2017 · 424
A Rant About Being You
Alan S Bailey Apr 2017
Now don't get me wrong,
This whole time that I was trying to understand
What you wanted, I couldn't help but notice
That I can't make sense of it all along.
This and that, blind tales, you have my full
Undivided attention, filling my head with
Strange and odd promises, telling me that
Although it seems unreal, you could just
Let them all in. If I took your "sound" advice,
If I'm alone, I could sleep with people on the street,
Put all of my food and drink upon
The ground, drag food around, your obsession
That I should feel fine to just pick it up and eat,
To try to defy my "religious" obsession, always
Try to be the one in charge, look for opportunities
To go off and put away or slay the "baddies" at large,
Become the person of the hour, or a follower,
Get a job where I can sweep floors and wipe tables,
So that I'll really be excited for the first time doing
What I do for a living, even if I'm not really able.
Who cares if this life throws everything bad at me,
I'm ready to attack all of the things that hold me back,
Even go for the things that don't interest me, instead of
Letting them be! YES, I believe "everyone" should work,
Even if they are really lost, psychologically unwell,
Major transportation issues and other real
Problems, No matter what we've been through,
No matter the actual real life hell,
We were all brought into this world to be
JUST LIKE YOU as well!
Apr 2017 · 255
That pain
Alan S Bailey Apr 2017
Over and over,
this smooth sound is going through one
ear and the other, the settle sound
of the rushing of blood
flowing through my ever shedding,
ever alleviating body, by nature? NO.
Still accompanied by the "truth," my human
parts being made without molded clay,
all of them free now, a part of something many
find "naughty."
You can find similarities in the mountains,
in the various hills arches, like the back, the neck,
the lift of the full volume of your chest,
You reach for the toothbrush, the comb,
ashamed; your hair in tangles, of the teeth that decay,
though one time you shall see how the
chest is so filled with pain. Nevermind.
We all don't care about that pain until it happens that
eventual day. This human body made "without perfections,"
it continues to smell, to pleasure or suffer, to be hungry,
to find itself wrapped up in it's sole need for ***.
We must remember to be clean for inspections.
No exceptions, no matter what is being said.
It will keep clawing, keep scratching, until it finds it's
way out, once it escapes it's metal cage.
Alan S Bailey Mar 2017
I make a promise to myself
To avoid the past and think of tomorrow,
In the dusk the world is a bitter reddish hue,
Under this happy sky with people dying in war,
It's just what we need to make certain that
We will "make it through," with "endless" life,
But there is really no other way I'm told.
You who deface nature for yourselves alone,
Trash the earth we were given that keeps us alive,
Even then you eat off of plates of gold.
We are your fools who sit in the library,
Reading some important history about
"Non-essential" needs of love and
The glory of the way of tribes past.
Whatever I am saying-even this moment
I'm being laughed at far and wide.
I'm wrong! I'm stupid. Go ahead, say it.
We're going the right direction, leave no stone
Un-turned, let no animal in the woods hide!
You will still show me "perfection" in destruction
And death once I let you get inside my head,
If we are the future, it's already dead...
Mar 2017 · 468
Two Words
Alan S Bailey Mar 2017
Forgive me...
I have "spoken wrong" again, been unjust with my words
Forgive me...
I have been eccentric, I haven't followed your personal ideals
Forgive me...
I am on a path to the other side, I am drinking
this "poison" down, it will be my own "undoing"
Forgive me...
Somehow these activities have been the grease
which lubricate the "devils wheels"
Forgive me...
I am underneath all "normalcy," I have seen things
that the children "should not ever see"
Forgive me...
There is a path I have tread upon that bares your mark,
I didn't see the mark before hand but "knew better"
Forgive me...
You are the one! You will show me the way, I am yours
to ****** upon all knowledge both right and wrong
Forgive me...
I will always be in your shadow, I am poor but still
I have "spoiled myself" with work that is lesser

~You will never say two simple words,
they are beyond your comprehension~

~You the "mature," "wise" old one with years of
learning and "pure" precision~

~I am always in your debt, you never need me,
I alone make the untrusted decision~

The two words you would never say are simple:

*~I'm Sorry~
Here goes...! Well at least I tried!
Mar 2017 · 404
Hating Life Right Now
Alan S Bailey Mar 2017
Feel my pain,
etched into time,
I am not the one
to keep others in line,
but sometimes I would
just love to be heard.
I am no one, that's clear,
so no one takes my word.
Put me in a ditch, make
yourselves grand,
you are the only ones who
others understand.
One things for sure-on a cold day
in hell, I'd never give you the time
of day, but I'm no one, so oh well.
Mar 2017 · 927
A Haiku For Giving Up Pride
Alan S Bailey Mar 2017
Addiction to this
Way of life, this country pride,
While others love it
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