There is an arrow, locked away
somewhere, silenced My heart has felt it, its caress True consolation of one's life That arrow, buzzing vibrato after so many windows of my soul, will break your chest, will strike you dead with no notice.
Laying in my cozy bed,
I oft wonder why? why am I here when others not? those that make a simple mistake and perish, yet I am here a friend telling me “you have more lives than cats” not a consolation to my deliriums The plethora of experiences too plentiful to parlay into one poem sixteen at last count multiple careening crashes, a gas tank explosion, illness, being hit by a car while standing at an ATM the litany long and varied but one stands out playing on a recently unfrozen pond raft fighting as it were young hearts being foolish falling in backwards, a non-swimmer it is so cold, frost bite pins & needles cold I am going deeper and deeper it is getting colder and colder darker and darker until it is totally dark no lingering thoughts, it is over then a pinprick of light drawing closer it grows and grows until I am in the light it is oh so warm here the lack of sound creating an incredulous peacefulness for a fear filled life can I stay forever, please except that is not my destiny not that day or those others rescued by a neighbor’s father delivered unconscious to a mother still questioning the why Andreas Simic©
on some days water would fall down
in heavy buckets; ravaging the hungry earth stricken— a wave of drought. the tiny specks of life swimming along the expanse of the universe would scatter to have a taste of the heavens and quench the need of being human. some would build infrastructures as great as lunar craters to catch every miniscule drop that comes from the sky, only to keep it in their possession, never to see another ray of light. those who have an abundance seem to have a hard time giving— hands formed into fists uncaring. what can be gripped, cannot be taken away. in this water, there will be power. what do the others do then? in a morbid sense of camaraderie, those who have their hands open, cupped, palms facing the heavens, can funnel grace into the palms of another. maybe this is where I will believe, despite the flashes of greed and envy, the kingdom of a god will always belong to the poor.
the poorest have the most to give.
I'm not sure what to say to you
Seemed to have lost my voice So I guess writing it down on paper Is my only other choice Only a tiny part of me is sad You decided to go a different way Not ready for something serious At least I'm not today I may be drenched in melancholy But the fault lies not in you Depressed long before we met Your presence made me feel less blue I couldn't describe accurately The plethora of emotions inside The strongest of these is envy Of the one who gets to be by your side Right behind is indignation In a close second place At the way you handled it Without any tact or grace I'm just waiting for you to talk to me I suppose you don't possess the nerve But how can you look at me and believe This treatment is what I deserve? I wasn't set on a relationship It was you who started this And it was your actions that convinced me I was more than just lips to kiss You told me you liked me I warned you wouldn't for long Your doubt warmed my center But it has now been proven wrong I recall you saying that you didn't want What you had with her before But maybe she has really changed And it won't be hard anymore I wish you both all the happiness And luck this cold world can hold Sincerely hope she is the one To stand by you as you grow old I don't know when my turn will come Or if my heart is capable of love at all But what is meant to be will be It's just not our time to fall I do not know if you see it how I do Maybe I am the one to blame For making myself too available Smothering the flame But you appeared to be an adult I assumed you were somewhat mature Different from my troublesome ex Who just made me insecure Only to find out you're no better Lying like all the rest Omission is still a form of deception I must say I'm unimpressed I thought we were closer than that That you would give me honesty What have I done to make you scared Of telling the truth to me A simple explanation was all it would take For why I was being neglected Instead dwelled on my every flaw Wondering which was rejected To discover it's not me at all But someone else that caused this change Actually comes as a relief Although that might sound strange I understand that love never dies Because I'm going through the same thing too The only difference is that the person I miss Replaced me with someone new Which I am surprisingly grateful for Because we are better off apart No matter how much it kills my soul Or paralyzes my heart If he wasn't taken I truthfully don't know If I would be able to resist Although I know he is no good for me Tempting urges persist So I wish you would have been forthcoming And shown me a level of respect I can't tell if it is my feelings Or your ego you're trying to protect You behaved like a gentleman Until you didn't want me around And instead of letting me down properly You didn't bother to make a sound But I guess you don't owe me a reason No commitment hanging between It is just that personally I have a problem with People who say what they don't mean I process conversation in a literal way When speaking aloud I follow through So naturally my brain presumes everyone else Is inclined to mean what they say too I forget sometimes how cheap talk is And guys want to come off as smooth and sweet So they fill our ears with ******* without even missing a beat You told me you would be right back Left me waiting up all night But that wasn't that big of a deal Didn't want to seem uptight Then you took off on a road trip Without saying farewell That's when I suspected something was up It was fairly easy to tell Then when I found out you drove past my house Spent time right down the road And didn't bother to stop for a second That's when I wanted to explode You blew me off two days in a row Yet give your attention to a ******* Do you get how low that made me feel? Like you just used me to hit and quit (it) And then when you finally show your face You barely speak two words to me I didn't know what pushed you away Just wished I was able to see It wasn't until later that night I saw her Facebook story posts And it dawned on me that I Wasn't actually what you wanted the most Don't know why you couldn't just say so Would have saved me a lot of frustration The only thing I deduce is that you Weren't man enough to handle confrontation Communication is key that is true To understanding and resolution Yet your cowardice tricked you into the false belief Avoidance the appropriate solution Running away from friction Because you lack the bravery Has really shown your true colors And I don't like the hues I see I shouldn't have gotten my hopes up When we had hardly just begun But I sensed a genuine attraction And with you always had fun But history outweighs sparks Shouldn't come as a surprise But if you regret it don't come crawling back Because I refuse to be your consolation prize
So sick of jerks
You deserve no pity for it was done in earnest;
Declaring innocence’s a consolation at best; Like us all through mortality you were put to the test; Carelessness’ a testimony upon which you now may rest. Against famine you took the lead by unsheathing the sword, Spilling blood amidst the pleads without believing the word. Our tribunal for this affair will have your future sealed; The trial may not seem fair, but so never were your deeds.
Written in July 2019.
— Copyright © M. Solav —
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by Michael R. Burch for Beth Counsel, console. This is your gift. Calm, kiss and encourage. Tenderly lift each world-wounded heart from its fatal dart. Mend every rift. Bid pain, “Depart!” Save every sorrow for your own untaught heart.
my heart wants to heard,
but everything else is blurred and the world isn't capable of listening. and so i resulted to writing, hoping that the pen and the paper could give me consolation.
then, i finally found solace.
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