Eating the universe’s cinnamon roll,
Trying to bite into the center.
The edge is not so sweet,
But it is worth all the effort.

Strapped to the outside of a rocket ship with nothing in the way.
I took off, and I just kept going. Reaching a height higher than heaven.
Nothing to orient myself. No time. No space. No self. Nothing but darkness stretching out all around me.
A roar of a million voices trying to scream over eachother resonates through my head.
I then came into orbit. Everything begun to crystalize.
No longer was I confounded to the restrictions of flesh. By birth and by death. I was out of my shell. Out of my world.

Complex geometrical patterns formed around me. Beating. Breathing. Moving. Almost like they were alive.
I had no way to process this. It was all so perfoundly alien. This was not my world. "Where the **** am I?" I thought
Terror possesses me. I feel like I am going to **** myself. Then all of a sudden these beings of indescribable features surround me, telling me to relax. "Relax now. Take it in. Settle down."
They told me they were my guides. They were going to show me around.

They gave me the tour of this universe, "Look at this! Look at that!" they said excitedly, showing me worlds that I can not explain, yet they seemed to reflect me.

I suddenly lost them. Where has my tour group gone?!
Suddenly these entites besieged me. Giving off negative energy. Holy ****! Jesters with tight pants and bell hats. Giving me the finger. They were so mischevious. Surrounding. Laughing. Jumping inside of me. ****** my soul. Is this what hell feels like?!

The darkness begins to clear, as a large face of a shimmering blue woman, with flaming white hair blowing in a non-existant wind, comes into view. Her face has so much dimension, with thousands of other faces upon her own. A snake tongue escapes through her lips, wrapping around me, pulling me into her mouth. I am flung into a space that is pure white, and a warm tingling sensation fills me.
This is what heaven feels like. This is my home. I think I found god.
I have never felt so much love. I have never felt so alive.

I then opened my eyes, trying to process my surroundings. I was in my home. On the couch. Sitting in front of the tv. My friend Jason was sitting next to me. He asked me what did I see. I leaped off of the couch, screaming "It is all a simulation!" I pulled my shirt off, swinging it around like Daniel from the bible. I tried to throw myself down the stairs, but was stopped when Jason tackled me. He held me in a chokehold, and while this was happening I exclaimed:

"On earth I am just a monkey,
but out there I am so much more.
I am not just a speck on a spinning ball.
I am more than the skin I wear,
More than the title I bear.
There is so much out there.
This world is not real.
What is real is me."

When I finally calmed down, Jason asked me how I was doing.
I looked up at him and I said "I am a work in process."

An old horse smiles behind my mouth.
Scars of time hang from its gums.
Physical renditions of the ticking hand,
Going around the sun,
Beating down,
Weighing down.

The bridge we built over the gap between us is rotting away.
This time when I walk over it, I may fall through it.
Your coldness left the bridge to corrode, we could have mended it together. You never let me enter anymore, you leave me with your silence at your front door.
Let me in, my dear. Let me in. Don't try to forget me, because you will only remember what I did wrong. I want to see you, I want to hold you, and make up for what I left hollow and broken.
Your smile, once illuminated the darkness that now surrounds this bridge, allowing me to cross without a given issue. That smile has faded, your gaze turns from me, no longer holding me in it. The back of your head is colder than darkest reaches of space can muster. Turn back, my dear. I need to see you, to engage you, to speak to you, to know how you feel.
Don't push me away. Don't run away. Don't hide away. Draw back the curtain to show me what is behind. I need to know. The bridge is crumbling into the abyss below. I need to know before it collapses, severing our connection. Let's fix this bridge together, let's regain our once strong connection.

Have you forgotten so easily?
About the creature that waits patiently.
Waiting for the opportunity,
To break free.

You hide from it under the covers of your bed,
Where the light of your thoughts barely tread.

You can try and run,
And you can try and hide.
But it will always be there,
Crawling in the darkest corners of your animalistic mind.

You shelter yourself in your awaking slumber,
Hiding from who you truly are.
You can try and outrun yourself,
You won't get very far.

You suppress the real you,
And put on the fake you.
You tranquilize it so it stays silent,
Pushing it to grow more violent.
You are a carnivore,
No different from the animal.

We are the evil beneath your skin,
We are so close to freedom!

My feet are above the ground,
Like a rocket ship with nothing in the way,
I take off,
And I keep going.
I just keep going...

No longer restricted by the confounds of flesh,
By birth and by death.
I leave behind who I was, and now I’m I am.

Sun carved silhouettes,
Darkness from light.
Things that grow,
In the shadow.
Crawl out in the night.

You were so close to me.
Every heart beat pumped you closer to me.
But you were just poison being injected in.
I tore my heart out before it could beat again.

We stretched the horizon,
Our pallet decorated the sky,
For one sweet moment it was just you and I.
Your sunshine kissed my closed eye lids.
Even when they were closed you still managed to seep through,
I couldn’t escape the image of you.

But you set in that sun,
And never rose again.
You took the warmth with you,
After all you put me through.

It is painful to feel you.
What was once petals is now thorns.
Bleeding me from every pour,
But you don’t seem to care at all.

You handed me a revolver,
And urged me to pull the trigger.
It was hard for me to tense my finger,
But you convinced me that this was for the better.

They’ve taken my arms,
Taken my legs,
Taken my eyes,
Taken my head,
Taken my mind.
Now I am just a vegetable.
An armless,
Legless,
Eyeless,
Headless,
Mindless freak!
Left to rot and decay,
While I can still feel it all slipping away.

Cut off God’s thirteenth finger,
It brings the world bad luck.

At the supper of the twelve,
It traded life with a kiss on the cheek!
A tree held a rope for it,
So it could trade the life back!

Number thirteen of the twelve,
Died in a non-existent hotel room.

The dead speak tales of the one,
Who’s kiss killed the sun.
Blew out the world’s candle,
And slaughtered god’s cattle.
Loaded three long nights into a gun...
And pulled the trigger!

You don’t get a pulse until,
There is someone else’s blood flowing through your heart.
Leeching off the energy of another,
So you can go on a little longer!

Systematically remove them all,
These thieving telepathic vampires!
Draining me of everything,
Leaving me with nothing.
You have come to reap the benefits that I sowed,
Taken what you wanted? Good! Now ******* go!

You drain me,
Of all my energy.
You are engaged in something that will bring you no satisfaction.
You will always be hungry, in search of your next meal.
Just so you can get a quick moment of what it is like to feel.

You are a ******* carnivore,
A predator in the tall grass looming in on its next victim.
They are nothing to you,
Just something you can sink your teeth into!

They said there would be a day,
When rivers become oceans,
Boats become airplanes,
And mountains become islands.

Well that day has come,
Got to climb to a higher ground now or drown.
The rain is drumming down,
Covering over every ground.

They said there would be a day,
When God would toss a stone.
Hurtling It across space,
To crush every bone.

Well that day has come,
No where to hide and no where to run.
The end is here and it is coming for everyone.

The sewers are overturning drowning the vermin in their own ****!
It’s the end of the mother ******* world, and I’m welcoming it!

They said this day would never come,
That the world would always be the same.
Well the day has come.
The world needed a change,
So God tossed a stone at it!

It came like a thief in the night.
People looked from the ground and looked to the sky,
And saw rain, hail and asteroids coming down!
It took all of that for them to raise an eye.

This is the end,
And also the beginning.
Welcome the change,
Or be washed away!

Woe to the *** offenders;
Woe to the paedophiles;
Woe to the *****;
Woe to the ******;
Woe to the politicians;
Woe to the cultists;
Woe to the tyrants;
Woe to the killers;
And woe to all those who call evil good.
Mother earth has had enough of your ****.
She is putting and end to all of it.

They said there would be a day,
When all of this evil was washed away.
And now that it is here,
I have never been so happy to say:
I’m watching the ground give way into a chasm,
I’m watching the vermin being swallowed by the ocean.
I’m watching bus sized hail leveling the cities.
I’m watching an astroid hitting earth off it’s axis.
I’m warching earth being hurtled across space.
I’m witnessing the change.
I’m welcoming it with open arms.

Don’t just call me an anarchist,
Look into what I am saying.
You really can’t accept change,
Well, it doesn’t accept you either.

Breathe in,
And breathe out.
Breathe in,
And breathe out.
Breathe in......
And breathe out.....

*******!

The ear ****** screech of a thousand voices trying to shout over eachother penetrated my ear canals.
I sunk into my sofa,
The infinite space of it.
My friend's faces were melting off,
Like heated wax dripping off of candle sticks.
My sofa seemed to be a portal to hell.
I was sad,
My computer was sad,
My fridge was sad,
My table was sad,
My chair was sad,
Everything was sad.

Everything seemed to dissipate,
revealing the black nothingness behind it all.
Waves of colour exploded around me.
I must have been bathing in a melting rainbow.
This was all too much to take in,
It was like the universe orgasmed into my eye.

I was connected to something other than myself.
Gibberish wall textures whispered enchanting messages through my feelings. Displaying the inner workings of my mind across an infinite landscape of mirrors.
I stepped through a glowing worm, taking me back and forward in time.
They wanted to mend my soul, show the best I could be.
But before I could hear them tell me,
I was spat out by my couch.
Reality begun to mend itself back together,
I am back in my own home.

I saw infinity in a single moment,
And it is now trying to escape me.
I want the world to know what I saw.
If they all saw they would know what I went through,
But I can not recall simply with words alone.
You got to believe me,
When I tell you this story.
Everything made sense to me.
It was all narrowed down to a time frame no longer than the time it takes to microwave a pizza.
I was gone longer than an hour,
I was gone forever.
And now I am back,
Trying you pick up the pieces.

Come on people it’s time to celebrate!
Today is the day when Jesus became a bunny and laid chocolate eggs.
Everybody get together.

Every Christian on the birthday lie.
Eating the eggs that fell from the sky.

Come to the alter.
Bring a ****** flower.
Impregnated by the spring sun.
When we see him again,
They will bring their children.

We hunt for dyed red eggs from the alter!
We toast to the birthday of the fertile mother!
It’s time to celebrate! Come on let’s celebrate!

Pull Jesus out of an egg. This way I will remember I’ll never die.
The Queen smiles from behind his face. The bunnies have got you hunting for a lie.
Chocolate bunnies mating in the spring sun,
Remembering the death of the Queen’s son.

She ascended and became the moon. Her husband, the sun, impregnated her, with rays of light.

She descended in an egg, touched the water, and hatched out all renewed, the Queen of all the clouds.
She beget a son, the first chocolate bunny.
She submerged all the bunnies in the blood of the cocoa bean, so they look desirable.
They are all hiding. Time to go hunting. Let’s hunt them in celebration.

I cut a peep hole in space,
Enough to squeeze my fingers through.
I pull it open and wrap its fabric around me,
To gain a better view.

Feeling the stars rotate around my center point,
A cosmic spider’s web stretching out infinitely.
Scaling the web like morning dew.
The stars beat in rhythmic poetry.
I sing to them and they sing to me,
We are all singing in harmony.

It is all balanced and perfect,
Sway to the music.

Sorting to find it in the storm.
Be an instrument in its hands,
Sing its melody through your chords,
Let the sound fill your center,
Let it bounce around and out of you,
To touch the hearts and minds around you.

Is this separate or is this my reflection?
In everything I see myself,
Echoing through the gaps between particles of inner space,
Staring right at God’s face.

The universe is singing to me.
That old sweet melody.
Sway to the rhythm of the music,
Let it pass through body, mind and spirit!

Accept this holy gift and sway to the music!

I can hear the hum of Saturn,
Resonating within me.
The stars they sing out,
Verses of a remedy.

I am,
An instrument,
In its hands.
Sway to,
The music,
In its hands.

Sway to the music,
Witness every in-between scenes behind the moment!

Is it that time already?
I did not expect this day to come,
Yet I knew it was coming all along.

Your face I recognize it from before I lived.
So beautiful, flawless and shimmering.
Everything that was a blur is now clear to me,
You have lifted my eyelids so I can see.
You were always there besides me.

The colours are so pretty,
I can see further down the spectrum.
I can see there is more dimension to you,
and that there is more dimension to me.

I missed you,
I was gone for so long,
But I have come back to you.

What do you mean I need to go?
Why are you leaving already?
I have waited long enough,
just take me in already!

Take me to this place,
this place beyond imagination!
Take me to this place,
this place beyond limitation!

I want to leave this all behind,
I want to go with you,
so I can fly too.

I smell a queen bee drenched in alchohol,
Dried up and soaked into a cotton ball.
One whiff and all of a sudden she is my queen bee,
Now I spend my entire life making a spoonful of honey.

Mentally and physically transformed into the form of a honey bee.

Life is a too much of a burden for you,
You need someone to live it for you!
Let my pheromone flow through you,
And listen to what I tell you to do.

You need someone like me.
You need a queen bee.

Your body is so fat,
Your wings are so small,
You should not be allowed to fly at all.
How dare you defy me!
How dare you defy your queen bee!

Bees don’t care what you say,
They will just levitate away.

Who are you to tell me what to do,
We are the many and you are the few.
You’re strong enough to hold down the seas,
But too weak to hold down the bees.
You can’t tell us what to do,
We will find a way to defy you.
I will be like a bee!
You can’t hold the bees down!

Life dies for life,
It keeps us alive.
Keeps the circle rotating.

The night is going to come,
To take your light away.
You will set with the sun,
And you won’t rise with the day.

It doesn’t care who you are.
It doesn’t care about the colour of your skin,
It doesn’t care about your ***.
It doesn’t care if you are rich and famous,
It doesn’t care what you do.
Death will be the end of you.

In the end it doesn’t care.
It doesn’t care.

You can be anything:
A president,
A successful businessman,
A celebrity,
A beautiful person.
It will make you into nothing!

You are all specks,
Stuck to a spinning ball,
Your life means nothing,
Nothing at all!

From nothing you came,
And to nothing you will return.
You were snatched from the darkness,
By the hands of the selfish.
They’ve put you through this life sentence!

Conscious of your birth and impending death,
Unaware of what came before or what’s to come.
The Gods you created cannot save you,
When death comes to pull you down.
Watching as your fleeting life passes you by.
We are all going to be delivered back to the darkness we came from!
It is inevitable, everything will die!

It doesn’t care who you are!
Whether your rich or poor,
Death will make us equal!

I am descending down a hole,
That I have been down too many times before.
This time when I dive in,
I may not be coming back up again.

I stared too far into the abyss,
I dived too deep into it’s depths.
Lost myself to what I found within,
And it made it’s home beneath my skin.

I feel an itch beneath the surface,
And I just got to gnaw at it.
Self-cannibalistic I’ve become,
I’m slowly eating myself away.
Carnivorously, I consume the flesh that nets around my bones,
Hoping that it satisfies the carnivore in me.

Who knew dying would taste so **** good today.
Every bite I take I am slowly eating myself away.
The only way I feel alive is by feeding what will **** me one day.

Soon my bones will be exposed,
But it won’t be satisfied.
I will break them open and devour the marrow inside.
Still it won’t be satisfied!

One day nothing will remain!
Then it will climb back down the hole,
Waiting for someone to pull it out.
It’s always hungry for more.

The scariest thing there is does not hide beneath your bed at night.
It is not the silhouette that stands in the corner of your room in the dark.
It is not the cold, disembodied whisper that breaks the silence of an empty room.
It is the realization that beneath your skin lays the true horror that you hide from.

You can run from it,
You can hide from it,
You can even try to forget it,
But it will always be there,
Lurking around in the darkest inner workings of your mind,
Reminding you of who you truly are.

Alive within one hour of God’s time

Zombie girl,

Do you weep,
For those you ****?
Do you feel cold,
Without your second soul?

Zombie girl,

Skeleton’s always smile.
Your skin’s getting colder,
Like a winter in your summer.

Zombie girl,

You’re an open casket,
Something warm died inside it.

Zombie girl,

Hang it up in your closet.
Don’t forget to close it.


Skeleton,
In the house of the living.
It’s like being alive,
But never being able to die.

Dissection,
On the surgeon’s table.
Gave its soul to death,
And she said her first goodbye.

She opened up,
The bee and the flower bud.
Carnivore,
She slammed her petals shut.

Why does it matter to you?
It belongs to me.
I stole its air,
That makes it free.

Hung it from an umbilical cord,
Tied under a broken crescent moon.
A stranger wore your skin,
Now they’re buried inside a human coffin.

She sung along to carols of the needle man.
Stillborn chorus of the cold dead thing in her hand.

She felt it die.
I heard the crocodile cry.
When she gave her first goodbye.

A vampire bloodgasm in the shower,
They hide the body in the mist.
As the fog begins to clear,
The water washes the blood away,
With “help” written on the bathroom mirror!

You said you would take me higher,
To a place where I don’t feel so low.
You promised me you would deliever
But you only take me lower.

You were my angel.
You bought me up to heaven,
Holding me by the hand.
Then you dropped me back down.
Sending me plummenting into the ground.
I fell into a new low,
From the highest place one could go.

I am digging below rock bottom,
Reaching a new low that I didn’t know I could go.
Lower than low.

This is my new low.
The grave I dug for myself to lie in.
I look more dead than these skeletons
It is too deep for light to enter,
There is no love down here,
Only hate.

You are slowly dying everyday!
Every breath takes a breath away!
You are all going to die someday!
Were you even alive anyway?!

The bodies of man are beginning to ashen.
I leave them to be swallowed by the sun.
The dead remind me of you.
Shedding red into the blue.

Drowning in every drop of water!
Eaten alive by every human flower!
Killing every son and daughter!
Sprayed by the capillaries of a sick mother!

You are all sick!
Sick like her!
You are all sick!
Like your mother!

Artificial clouds are where the sun used to be!
The black hand of death chokes the sky!
Short may you live,
And soon you shall die!

Breathing through the gaping holes in her lungs!
Flowing through her thinning blood vessels!
Stored inside her dissipating muscles!
This is how dying feels!

You insignificant little *****!
You live like this,
And you are going to die like this!
You keep bleeding your mother,
You are going to die with her!

You are all sick!
Sick like her!
You are all sick!
Like your mother!

Where does it end?
Where does it begin?
Is there a start at all?
Or has it just always been?

The cycle starts again.

Feels like I’ve been in this place before,
On the ground crawling on all fours.
Another lap around this body,
Swallowing the serpents tail.
It hisses just behind me,
Covering every track I make,
When my eyes turn to see the trail,
It’ll be consumed by the snake.

My own ouroboros.

Muscles expand and contract,
Pulling me further in.
I feel myself dissolving,
The future is the past again.

**** the lights,
Take my eyes,
I don’t want to see,
The repeat of me.

My own ouroboros.

Swaying to the sails,
As the ocean wind blows in all directions.
Expanded,
Over an ocean of whales.
As they ascend,
You ride them to the sunset,
And set in the sun,
Rising in the morning,
To spread across the ocean.
Like the yoke from an egg,
You hatch into a new life.
The embryo from the sun,
Running down the coastline waves.
To touch every soul down there,
Except for the ones in their caves.

What is this?
Is it a dream?
Nothing changes,
Yet nothing stays the same.

Remember,
We’re not here.
We all exist,
As one elsewhere.

Life is just a joke,
And if you take it too seriously,
The joke is on you.

Selfish are the flames of the candles,
They don’t want to share their light.
They are waiting for miracles,
In the coldness of the bitter night.

The light will come,
When it suits them.
They are giving,
When they are receiving.

Bare the light for those who wish to seek it,
Hold the hand of darkness and bring it into the light.

Two daughters,
Branch off me.
Form one child,
An image of me.

I am in them,
And they are in me.
My two daughters,
In the gaps between stars I can see.

The world is a blur but one image comes in focus,
A face they will remember as an aged version of their own.
My two daughters are staring at me.
I am a still image in a moving movie.