So many things went wrong.
So many things went right.
So many things keep me up at night.
But they aren't memories of us
or what we've been through.
What keeps me up at night
are the last words I said to you.

First thing you see on the evening news
Mama cries in a sea of camera crews
She pleas for justice but we just stop and stare.
We could do so much better if we tried to care.
Mama's back to work after a week to grieve.
She can't help but wear her broken heart on her sleeve.
She breaks down and says "I need more time."
Boss says "sorry. There's the unemployment line."
We don't need to change the world.
We just need to change our minds.
We'll see things in a different light
when we pull back the curtains and blinds.
If we remember how to listen to what people say,
Maybe we can find our way back to better days

Dear fellow lonely hearts I will never know, as this Valentine's day rolls around, I just want to let you know...i love you.

i don't understand
I know i'll never understand
I just wish you would have reached out for my hand.
I would have raised you up
got you back on your feet
and help you realize life doesn't have to be a one way street.
but there's nothing i can say.
no there's nothing i can do
to bring you back so i'll just remember you
and hope you're in a better place
where the sunshine kisses on your face.
I hope the beer tastes better
and it's always perfect hunting and fishing weather.
I hope you remember us
and know that we'll remember you.
it'll be hard to push through
but we'll find a way to cope.
but until we meet again, the best I can do is hope.
ever since the day you left,
my heart feels like it's been a victim of theft.
and every time i see your face in a photograph,
I can't help but sit back and laugh.
then your voice pops in my head
and I remember all the things left unsaid.
I wasn't ready to let you go
but I need you to know
I forgive you
and hope you're in a better place
where the sunshine kisses on your face.
I hope the beer tastes better
and it's always perfect hunting and fishing weather.
I hope you remember us
and know that we'll remember you.
it'll be hard to push through
but we'll find a way to cope.
but until we meet again, the best I can do is hope.
you inspired me to be a better man
and showed me how to be a better friend
and these are lessons i'll take with me to the end
but there's nothing I can say
no, there's nothing i can do
to bring you back so I'll just remember you
and hope.

Every day, you feel like you're dying inside
trying to ignore the pain gifted by a world that can be so unkind. You look in the mirror and try to like what you see.
But the ones who broke your heart
won't let you see how beautiful you are.
If you feel alone and scared to trust the ones that love you
because you feel like they won't understand,
it's easy to push love away
when you feel like you're the only one who knows your heart
and you're the only one who can.
But please, don't give up on love.
Don't give up on your heart.
Forget about the ones who couldn't see your beautiful soul right from the start.
Don't give up on your dreams
and someday you'll find
this crazy life can be so much better than it seems.
So don't give up on love.

So tired of being the owner of a heart that's broken
All I want is the courage to love with arms wide open
But everything I've seen and everyone i know tells me it's not worth it
But how could it not be worth it?
Every time I start trying to make myself better
My brain keeps asking does it even matter
The hardest thing about living with depression
Is when you lose hope you'll ever notice your reflection
But just like there's more than one way to hurt
There's more than one way to heal
And you deserve to know that your pain is real
There's gonna be some bad, but it's gonna feel so good
When you realize it's OK if you're misunderstood.
It's gonna take some time, but you're gonna be ok. Because for what it's worth, I'll be with you every step of the way

I know it does, but hear me out.
What if...it doesn't matter? What if none of it mattered? The clothes you wear, how little or how much you care. The way you deal with stress and grief. Whether people see you as strong or weak. How you spend your money. How much you get paid. How and what you eat vs how much you weigh. Here's the thing: it doesn't have to matter. Because you decide who and what is important to you.

I found myself in the darkness,
Then took a chance
And found you in the light.
Even though we're as different
As day and night,
With your hand in mine,
I know we'll be fine
As we walk the line

"Who cares?"
"I care."
"Why?"
"Because I've been there.
And I know how much it means to be able to have someone to talk to when life gets so unfair."
"You have no idea what I'm going through.
How dare you say you understand."
"You're right. I very well might not understand.
But I'm willing to listen. And when you're finished, if you want, I'll help however I can."

The opposite of war isn't peace.
It's creation.
So take this time of isolation
To make something that inspires
A generation.
A poem. A movie. A song.
Something that reminds us
That even though we feel alone,
We belong.

You tell yourself lies to get through the day
because you feel like no one will believe what you say.
No one understands how cruel they can be to you.
They tell you they love you and that's all it takes
to forgive them until the next time they break.
Deep in your heart you know that's not what love really is.
Take it from someone on the outside looking in.
They're starting to do damage to more than just your skin.
If you don't get out now I fear it's only a matter of time
before you become a victim of the most heinous crime.
It's okay to ask for help.
It's okay for any of us to.
It may not seem fair to tell people about our struggles.
It may not seem right.
But if you let someone help,
eventually they will help you find your light.

Sometimes, it feels like life
would be so much easier if I could just believe. Believe that it's all going to be alright.
Believe that it's worth it
to fight for what you want.
That it makes a difference if you stand up.
That there's a heaven,
and we know what it's like there.
Hell, if I could believe in myself.
But life can only rock your boat so many times before that little voice in your head whispers "what's the point?" The point is...security.
while it can be redundant,
there is so much uncertainty. Unpredictability. It's no wonder so many people
struggle with anxiety.
But if you believe,
at least you have something to hold on to.

Are we really at the end?
Or is this just a new beginning
I can't say I'm afraid because I lived a life worth living.
Whatever lies ahead, you made me strong enough to face it.
My only regret is leaving you behind but it's ok
I know I'll see you again someday

For years, you've asked questions
you can never seem to find the answer to.
"How do I make someone love me?"
"How do I know if my feelings are true?"
So tonight, I have a secret I'd like to share with you.
It's something not a lot of people know or know how to do.
The secret? Be you.
I know vulnerability is scary.
But true love gets its strength from the heart.
And if you can find the courage to be proud of who you are, you may not find love immediately, but it's a **** good place to start.

Love me for who I am.
Love me for who I'm not.
If you can do that,
I'll give you everything I've got.

It's not your job to prove them wrong.
Sometimes, just walking away
Says more than words ever could.
It's not your job to fight
In a fight that's not yours.
But sometimes, it's what's right.
It's not your job to forgive someone
Or take them back.
Listen to your heart,
You will be on the right track.
Your only job is to be yourself.
To do what's best for you, your health,
Your happiness.

These days, the years come slow and go by so fast.
These days, it's hard to make memories and even harder to make them last.
These days, we're afraid of ourselves as much as we are of strangers.
These days, we see everything as a danger
These days, we're getting farther apart even though we're starving for connection.
But the isolation is a great opportunity for self reflection.
Unfortunately, we look at the clock and think we have to rush.
These days, we don't take enough time to appreciate the power of a kiss, hug, or touch.
These days, words have more power than ever. So please take the time to think about what you say.
It may change how people think of you for the rest of your days.

"I'm too afraid to die but in too much pain to want to live.
So tell me, what do you do when you've given all you feel you have to give?
"Just live."

Where are we?
This place looks familiar,
But where are the screaming kids?
Where are the runners and bikers?
Why is it so hard for parents
To find toilet paper or diapers?
Why are people wearing masks?
It's spring, not Halloween.
I'm sure this place has its charm
But I want to go home.

I want to thank you
For letting me see
The wonder in your eyes.
The ones that shine
Brighter than the stars in the sky.
I want to thank you
For making me believe
That it's okay for me to chase my dreams.
All the times I thought I lost my way
I prayed for guidance and I swear I heard you say...
It's okay if you feel lost.
It's okay if you don't know which way to go.
Don't be afraid of taking chances.
Sometimes that's the only way to know.
But if you're afraid
Just listen to your heart.
You can always find your way back home.
Every day, I wake up and say
"Thank you for another day."
But when times get bad,
And nothing goes my way,
I turn on the radio
And suddenly I know I'll be okay.
Because I heard the words you said that day.
It's okay if you feel lost.
It's okay if you don't know which way to go.
Don't be afraid of taking chances.
Sometimes that's the only way to know.
And if you're afraid,
Just listen to your heart.
You can always find your way back home.
As this journey gets longer,
My faith is getting stronger.
That we are here for a reason.
Cause we all need something to believe in.
And tonight I believe it's okay if you feel lost.
It's okay if you don't know which way to go.
Don't be afraid of taking chances.
Sometimes that's the only way to grow.
And if you feel lost,
If you feel cold,
Just listen to your heart.
You will always find your way back home.

If you want to take my hand, just cross the line you drew there in the sand
If you open up your heart I'm sure you'll find
Love doesn't have to be so blind.
If you're afraid, it's okay to let it show.
Fear is how we learn to grow.
So if it's me you want to stand beside, just close your eyes and free your mind.
Do you want to be my friend
Or do you want to be my lover
Do you want to see a movie or meet me under the covers
When you figure out what you want just let me know.
But whatever you decide, let your true colors show.

I want to tell a story but I don't know where to start.
See, I've kept the words hidden.
Locked away inside my heart.
Waiting for the day that you come find me.
Waiting for the day you rescue me from the darkness in my heart. Yeah, I know you'll set me free.
Free from all the doubts and lies I thought I had to tell myself.
So worried about the thoughts and words from everybody else.
It took me years to understand that life is not a race.
If you make your own path and stay with it,
someday you'll find your place.
I don't want to wait anymore.
I don't want to feel I've wasted my life
waiting for a fantasy that may never be real.
I want to prove I can be happy without you by my side
so I'll give it one last shot and tell the story of the time I tried

Bring on the rain.
Bring on the pain.
So I feel like I have a chance
That there's something
I could gain.

I saw the world the way I saw myself:
a reflection. A reflection of how I thought people looked at the world; me.
I thought everyone else knew better than me. So, they had to be right.
But I realized that's not healthy.
Because they are not you.
Even if you tell them,
they will never understand
what you are going through.
Because they are not you.
Your decisions, your life,
are yours and yours alone.
But make no mistake.
If you ever want help, please,
don't be afraid to pick up the phone.

It pays to stay informed
But you have to pay to stay informed.
Because the more you know,
The more you grow.

I can't lie. I can't pretend.
I'm not ready to dive
into the fire again.
After all the heartbreak
The world has shown
I'd rather have medusa
Turn my heart to stone.

Didn't see the signs
Or read between the lines.
Was blind because you were mine.
Didn't take the time
To make sure you were the one for me.
Just didn't want to be lonely.
And now you're going to leave me anyway.
But when you do,
Don't say "sorry, it's the way it has to be."
Don't say
"sorry. Maybe we're not meant to be."
If you want to leave,
I won't make you stay.
But if you want to leave,
I promise I'll be okay.

"If you'd be with me,
I'd give you the world."
"I don't want the world."
"Why not?"
The world today
Is different than it was yesterday.
It's different from the world
We'll live in tomorrow.
I might not want the world tomorrow."
"So what do you want?"
"To be happy."

I can't see myself the way you see me
But maybe that's the way it's meant to be.

You don't see the world I see.
You can't know who I'm meant to be.
So how can I trust you
when you say you know what's best for me?

It's a big mistake staring at the ticking clock waiting for an opportunity to knock. Nothing's going to fall at your door. So find something worth fighting for. When you realize success in life is not defined by your wealth, you can begin the journey toward the pursuit of happiness that will ultimately better your health. On this journey, there may be times when your heart may break and the pain may feel like it's too much to take. But if you can find the strength to carry on, you'll find the things you can do will be remembered long after you're gone

Doc tells me im still alive. Don't know how but not complaining. Just trying to live in the here and now. But that doesn't mean I've forgotten my past. Think about life as a boat on the open sea. The mast, the pole in the center of the boat, is your past. It's the foundation and holds up the sail which is your future. You're the captain; the one who controls the here and now. Your loved ones are your power; the wind that pushes you forward. And the sea, that's the most important part
It represents the unknown. The things you can't control. There will be days when the thunder claps and your boat floods from Whitecaps. I know it's hard, but if you don't worry about the sea, what you can't control, and don't block out your past, you can give your all to someone and find happiness that lasts.

I take a look around this store
and can't help thinking...there's got to be something more.
Something better just waiting on the other side of the door.
I've made lots of memories through the years.
I even made some friends who taught me how to face my fears.
I may not know what lies ahead
but I'm leaving here with nothing left unsaid.
Now it's time to grow up. Time to move on.
Time to learn about the world and see a new dawn.
I feel so alive now that I'm finally free.
The only one who's going to stop me is me.
One thing I learned I want you to understand,
don't be afraid to fall. Someone will help you stand.

I get undressed and pat my bed
Until I find the pillow that rests beneath my head.
As I slide beneath the sheets,
I can't help but get excited
As I hear the pitter patter of your feet.
Then the bed creaks,
And as you get closer,
My face gets hotter. I'm sure it's as red as a beet.
Now, I feel something close to my face.
It's not my pillow, but a warm embrace.
As my head lays to rest, I can't help but wonder
if it's cradled in your hands or your *******.
As I lay there, tears stream down my cheek
And then, I feel blessed as I hear you, my angel, speak.
"What's wrong, my love?" you say as you wipe away my tears.
"I just wish I could see you.
To be able to look you in the eyes and "thank you."
You have no idea how much it means to have you here."
You just smile, kiss my head,  and stroke my hair until we fall asleep here in my bed.

Associated with Death

Most of my life,
Death has been interested in me.

Like a crush teasing you
Just letting you know it's there.

A new song you put on repeat
Because it resonates in your soul.

It would disappear in the bad times,
Take hold in the good.

A stranger.
A best friend.

I'll be associated with death
The rest of my life

Because I decided once
It was time to die.

We talk about change whether it's good or bad
We talk about our dreams and things we wish we had.
We talk about our days.
We talk about our wives.
We talk about everything we hate in our lives.
We talk about things that never happened in bed, and yet for all the things we say, we can never seem to talk about what's really going on in our heads

I look at you looking at me.
Please, tell me, what do you see?
Do you see a man with a gentle soul?
Or can you see straight through to my darkness
trying to take control?
You ask what I see when i look at you.
Do i see a loyal friend?
Or can i see how much you're dying inside?
Pretending to be strong
for those who need a friend to stand beside.
It's something we struggle with every day.
And it's a fight worth fighting every step of the way.
Something i want you to keep in mind though:
even if the darkness wins, and all we can see is black
darker than the darkest night, in the end, we will all see the light.

Keep writing about you
Keep writing for me
Keep writing about the future you want to see
Keep writing about your love
Keep writing about your pain
Keep writing about your dream of kissing someone in the rain.
Keep writing when you feel blue
Keep writing when you feel high
Keep writing about the name you'd give your own personal star in the sky.
Keep writing about the fun.
Keep writing about the night you had one too many beers
Keep writing to pass your wisdom on through the years.

Trying to get ahead
but I can't silence all these thoughts inside of my head.
Looking everywhere for a place to reset. Get a grip.
But my demons are screaming so loud it's like I'm on a bad trip. They say god never gives us more than we can take.
But I don't know how much longer I can hold my breath
before I find myself at the bottom of the lake.
I clutch my chest gasping for air,
and with my hand on my heart,
I pray for another day; a chance to prove I deserve a new start.
I close my eyes one last time and let myself go.
The demons leave my mind, body and soul.
I feel a rush come over and open my eyes
to realize it was all a dream; I'm still alive.
Now that I made it through, my mission is clear.
I know what to do. I now have a purpose:
use my experiences to help the broken and scarred find their faith, and help them believe loving, living, fighting is not a mistake.

Are you sitting at home waiting for work to start? Just so you can have something
to take your mind off the pain filling your empty heart?
Are you having trouble falling asleep at night?
Wishing that the last thing you said wasn't the result of a fight?
Sometimes, we all say things we don't mean.
Whether it's because we're afraid,
because we're confused,
or somewhere in between.
But what we say isn't nearly as important as what we do.
So if you really want to prove you're sorry, don't just say you want to change. Follow through.

Things change every day
whether we like it or not.
That's why it's so important
to work with what we've got.
Because one day, they just might pave paradise to put up a parking lot

If you can't put words
To the pain and fear you feel,
Lose yourself in some good music
Until you start to heal.

Your birthday is important.
The day you die is important.
But so is every day in between.

today's the day I'll say good morning
Instead of goodbye.
Today's the day I'll laugh
Instead of cry.
But of all the things
I hope today will be,
I hope today's the day I'll be okay

I'm not afraid of who I am.
I'm not afraid of who I was or where I've been.
I'm not afraid of who I'll be.
I'm not afraid of what people think of me.
The thing that's always stopped me was...
"I'm worried that I'll let their words affect me."
So, I've decided that "It's OK if they affect me."
Because I'd rather be hurt today
Than risk letting it stop me tomorrow.”

The world is healing
As our worlds are crashing down.
But someone has to fall
So another can wear the crown.
But even if we have to resort
To eating beans and rice,
Isn't having a healthy earth
Worth the sacrifice?

I don't know how to explain it,
But somehow, it seems like the world
Has gotten louder AND quieter
At the same time

I've seen good.
I've seen great.
I've seen love.
I've seen hate.
I've seen fire.
I've seen rain.
I've seen joy.
I've seen pain.
I've seen a lot in my time.
But just once, I'd like to feel it all
Before I reach the end
Of this mountain climb.

You don't have to stand up.
You don't have to stand down.
You don't even have to stand your ground.
You don't have to stand up for yourself.
You don't have to stand up for anyone else.
You don't have to stand up for what you believe, but take it from me.
You'll never know how much of a difference
it can make if you do.

Consider this:
at its core, a ghost is typically described as little more than a restless spirit.
Given this description, it's not too much
of a stretch of the imagination
to suggest that you don't have to die
to be a ghost.
After all, things change every day.
It would be concerning if you didn't feel lost or anxious at some point. The question then becomes "what do you do if you feel this way?" The answer: remember who you are and all it took to get you to where you are today.