Submerged into a pool of glistening hope,
I float alone.
There is not an anchor in the world that could weigh me down,
Until he jumps in.

I gently sway over the waves that are cast my way
And I begin to feel a current.
It sucks me closer until it can swallow me whole;
There I am engulfed and my vision blurs.

Rock bottom is a cement pool with thirty kids around
And you’ve lost your goggles so you dive down deep
But you can’t see straight without them
So you fumble aimlessly until you run out of air—

That’s where he found me.

His eyes were clear and free from inhibition.
He saw my and struggle and offered his assistance,
But the problem was that I never asked for it.
I still got it anyways.

The panic set in when my lungs became plastered,
Water rushed in and I couldn’t swim any faster.
He tilted my head back and coated me with laughter
Until he knew that I could not swim away.

Two fish colliding in the ocean at dark,
One was a minnow and the other a shark.
I was thrashed in his teeth and my heart ripped apart,
But he was praised by his friends the next day.

I climbed out of the water and crawled into the mist.
Reality set in and I was alone.
My body was no longer mine as I traced his fingerprints up and down my thighs,
And all I could do was go home.

Teach me how to suffer,
Such great pain like yours
Deeper than the ocean
Until the core of my soul.

Everything I remember,
Was a deafening calling
Inside these ears of mine.
Where am I?

I break into your house,
Sweet sanctuary, I taste
On the tip of my tongue.
And here I am, guarding him
From the troubles of this world,
We both found ourselves in.
Oh, what my eyes can see,
Right here, in front of me.
My extraordinary master
He's, as surmised, asleep.
I shall find the secret
Of such peace to keep.
But what is this smell?
It's like the summer breeze
Fragrant sweet, so pleasing
Is it my master's scent?
I get close to his bed,
He looks like a dream,
I wonder if he can see me
Inside his deep trance?
His hair is soft to the touch
Chestnut turning grey at night.
Is this his journal over there?

I want to be wonderful
Just like my winsome master,
Sealed mouth, yet
Garnished with gold;
Write beautiful words,
And be silver tongued.
Write about false lovers,
Stories never lived but told.

He's awake, good heavens, he's awake
He starts yelling, throwing things
Floating in the air, for seconds
Until they hit my static shell
Breaking bit by bit, in front of him.
No, dear master, stop this rage of yours
Until one of us will remain only bones...

Don't ignore my calling
Let's stab each other's wounds
With the letter knife
Laying on your desk.
Teach me precious lessons,
You, greatest of all,
Of those horrid people,
No faith can stop.
Killing from guilty pleasure,
Faces, hidden from the sun
Unstained innocents,
All they start to run
Over, again in circles
"Somebody stop this person!"
Red ink and silent screams.
Has my master gone to sleep?

I daren't live my life
All wasted in vain,
Why is my idol,
Looking down on me
From the pedestal
He's carefully put on;
I'm your humble pupil,
Teach me how to sing,
Like the mockingbird
I killed.

I am now the master,
Greatest of all!
Kneel down upon me,
Listen.

If you were a secret
afraid of being mocked
hide not yourself in a treasure chest
in case you get caught locked

For what will become of a secret
If they lost the key
No longer an unknown secret
But an unsolved mystery

I am terrified to the belief of silence, the thought of social suicide,
glances towards you and back, leave streaks of warmth and shivers of fright.

The bronze medal eye shine fill my hope day by day while the petals fall forward,
my heart swoons over the award of life, praying each day to last longer in sight.

You hid carefully behind shades of roses, but the petals kept falling,
my eyes of green seep emotions untold to fuel a gaze of glazed truth burning me.

Smiling towards me with your daily mood of cheer, while my heart aches a little,
for I share an admiration stronger than cheer, I know for a fact, this love holds me hostage.

So I walk calmly forward into this forest blindfolded, holding a string to unknown,
while many follow me carelessly wondering on and on,
I feel my heart drip away from the heat towards the cold.

They see the raindrops as moments of hidden daylight, yet I run into the puddled fantasy,
I wonder if you notice the rain feels warmer this time around, as you smile gratefully.

Shades of purple fall on us both, but the petals are all gone,
This is the truth coated in shades of blue,
as I serenade to you, taking my mask off for a final time.

...
But in the deafening sounds of silence
There lay thousands of silent screams
Never to be heard by anyone
But the ghosts that haunted
The sinners and the damned
...
If only you could hear
The echoing of their voices
In the corners of my mind
In the emptiness of the night
Then and only then
Would you understand
That behind my smiles
And stupid childish jokes
Lies a thousand unheard screams
Demanding me
To let them break out
And finally be free
...
Because I am the Tortured and the Damned.

A secret observer,
a spy you would say,
he's sitting in the corner
watching us,
as we pass by
and then pass away.