BW 1d
First date. Bistrot Pierre.
Your mother rang you up
"She doesn't want me to hoe around, you know what, I will."
I choked on my wine.
Your eyes glittered, your lips curving
into a deliciously wicked cheeky smile

Second Date. Franca Manco.
You went to the bathroom
took your hoodie off to reveal a half sheer top
The pizza or you? I hesitated for the first time
You bit your lips, lashes curled
the blush on you dainty and delicate

Third date. My shower
You massaged my hair while laughing
"We are the weirdest couple ever"
bare lips, wet hair, your body on mine
You made me sober yet fearless as a drunkard
You made a marriagephobic crave for love
"Let's get married."

Your jaw dropped
a true poem haha
It's not enough to hold the hands and walk,
It's not enough to have an endless talk,
It's not enough to kiss you once in a while
It's not enough, not until you smile.

It's not enough to buy you gifts,
It's not enough if our moment swifts.
It's not enough to serve my heart for a meal,
It's not enough, not until I feel what you feel.

It's not enough if you want to love her,
It's not enough if you just 'want' things for her,
It's not enough for her, just the roses red,
It's not enough, not until you kiss her on the head.

It's not enough to wish you morning,
It's not enough for a sweet corning.
It's not enough if I don't let you face the sky,
It's not enough, not until I let you fly.
It's just not enough to love her... Not until you make her feel loved.
She finally found inner happiness
She finally dreamed of nothing
stolen dreams on lavender pillows

Thats all he wanted for her
That soft blue eyed girl
with so much love to give,
her heart beats too fast
and her body heats up with loving lust

He would have given as much as he could spare
He would motion to slit his wrists
to mirroring her scars
If that would have made her smile

but she ran
ran away
leaving ashes of hopes
breaking the foundation of humanity
because she needed to find another moon
In herself
Without him.
Revelation of Love -
it all started
with a wink
that unraveled
the mystic sentiments -
a sudden spark
that may corrupt.

Lust of Love -
a thirst to be quenched,
a hunger to be satisfied
sparks flames of deceit
and destroys the essence
of genuine love.

Compassion of Love -
true love, it is
that hopes to unite
galaxies apart
picks not
from the favored
but delivers unto all -
that which sparked lights
that lit up the dark void.
Aaron LA Lux Feb 14
No Valentine

Happy Valentine’s Day,
so fckn cliche,
no Valentine,
no sublime,
no feelings of ecstasy,

no we just me,

alone,
once again,
faced with my own thoughts,
and the deafening sounds of this silent hotel room,

I’m alone,
and I probably deserve it,
this is likely my proper karma,
the emotional toll paid in full all cash no credit,

the piper being paid,
for every heart I’ve ever slayed,
for every good girl I’ve ever played,
for every time I left when she wanted me to stay,

they were good girls,
they didn’t deserve it,
I was a bad boy,
and didn’t even know it,
I guess the only thing worse than breaking a heart,
is not even realizing that you’re the one that broke it,

she loved me,
most of them did,
and I left most of them,
with scars and sorrowed sentiment,
and I apologize in all honesty,
even though heartbreak was never what I intended,
but breaking a heart is breaking a heart,
no matter whether or not the Breaker even ever meant it,

this is what happens when there’s desire,
but for lasting love their’s no incentive,
like a dozen roses ready to go,
with the postage paid but with no place for the sender to send it,

as this sick cycle signals,
it’s time to either heal this or end it,
as these deep wounds burrow,
this can only be described as deserted and desolate,

chocolate,
hearts,
melt,

in the Sunshine of Time,

thoughts,
of her,
felt,

as they frolic through my mind,

no Valentine,
probably won’t have one,
until I’ve paid in full,
for every good girl I ever left,

so I likely have a few more heartbreaks headed my way,
because I’m not yet done paying off this debt,

and I’ll pay,
and I’ll pay,
and I’ll pay,
I’ll pay until there’s nothing left,

and then,
hopefully,
at that point in time,
I will finally find the girl out there that I know somewhere exists,

the one that’s been doing time like me,
the one who’s broke just as many hearts,
the one who too is paying off her relationship karma,
by repeatedly getting her heart broken apart,

even though we know what they say,
you can’t turn a bad girl good,
but once a good girl goes bad she’s gone,
forever,

whatever,
either way she’s out there,
and even though I’ve never met her,
I know I already love her,

that girl that no longer wants to be a player any more,
I don’t want to be a player anymore I just fck a lot,
no Big Pun intended but everything else I meant it,
writing this Love Letter on Valentine’s day with no where to send it.

Anyways I know that ex-player turned good girl exist,
and she feels just like I do in this exact instant,
she’s somewhere alone paying off her debt,
for all the guy’s who’s hearts she broke even though she never meant it,

and now,
she feels like I do like ditto,
tired of playing the field,
just looking for a solo love that can be true like bingo ,

and one day we’ll meet,
and we’ll probably get married but no kiddos,
because 2’s a company but 3’s a crowd,
and that’s one thing that both of us still know,

that’s why I write this out loud with,
the hopes that she’ll find these words right wherever she is,
and she’ll find me somehow from this love letter,
like a message in a bottle sent from an island and found by a ship,

and when we finally meet it will be love at first kiss,

this,
is what I hope for,
no more promiscuous sex,
nope no way no more,

I’m a born again virgin,
holding out until I finally meet that Apple of my eye,
and until then,
I’m not dating anyone no way no how nope no Valentine,

because I don’t deserve one,
won’t until I’ve paid off this debt in full,
for every good girl that I’ve ever left,
still hold no regrets even though I’m lonely as Hell,

so I likely have a few more heartbreaks headed my way,
because I’m not yet done paying off this debt,

and I’ll pay,
and I’ll pay,
and I’ll pay,
I’ll pay until there’s nothing left,

until I’m totally spent,

but until that time I’m alone,
once again,
faced with my own thoughts,
and the deafening sounds of this silent hotel room…

∆ Aaron La Lux ∆

Free download of the new book here: www.scribd.com/document/367036005/The-Sydney-Sessions-12-Steps
BW Feb 14
NW
You don't drive me crazy the way he does
You don't
Make me reckless, obsessed, sleepless
Holding something I thought would slip
But an illusion that was never there

You don't make me beg for your love
Maybe you don't
Ignore all my feelings, hide my heart under my sleeves
Making August January in one blink
Plumbing my heart into nitrogen gas

But You don't know what you did to me
The party your eyes found my figure in the crowd
the hoarse confessions of love,
Besides my ears, hot breaths and strong arms
Holding me tight even when you sleep
Burying your face in my neck, calling it home
Pulls me into the shower against you and kiss me
wet and willing, until I run out of breaths
Dinners and Carafe, collars and leashes.
The way you look at me, eyes full of love.

So if they ask me if you are my type,
whether you make my heart go mad
I would smile and say no
My heart doesn't go mad, because it found home
You are not my type, you are the love of my life
To the love of my life.
Aaron LA Lux Feb 14
We are both living our lives,
Complete within ourselves,
yet without each other,
uniting with Mother Nature when there’s no one else,

together even though we’ve never met,
wide awake like we’ve never slept,
see we wake walk in this dream world,
beings being right here now like we never left,

and I’m ready for whatever yes,
because we both the soul is always blessed,
even though this world can feel hurt and cursed,
we will not only survive but thrive & make sense of this mess,

and I could go on forever,
because that’s exactly how long we’ve gone for,
but I have a life to live so I’m going to log off now,
so I can get back on to living that life others would die for,

but before I go,
there’s one last thing I’ll say,
in order to get love,
you must give love away,
in order to feed your soul,
you must starve your ego,
so the only way to hold on,
is to finally let go,

so let go of the idea of self,
only then will you be liberated,
see there is no you nor I nor us,
there is only everlasting Light fully illuminated…

∆ LaLux ∆

new book for FREE here: www.scribd.com/document/367036005/The-Sydney-Sessions-12-Steps
Aaron Layton Feb 7
Please be kind to me
My soul is unharmed and free
I travel in my dreams
Always the same place it seems

The place where I met you
So vivid it hardly seems true
Then I wake to morning light
To find your stare is a perfect sight

I smile and laugh at your faces
Knowing that I have to be places
But not wanting to go anywhere
For without you I have no stories to share

So please be kind to me
And let my soul be
For I travel in my dreams
To a place that seems
          
Free
BW Feb 5
10:39:47
She should be married by now
I watched
The black hand on the white basel
tick on, reflecting my poker face
with the Patek Phillipe logo

10:41:35
Numb. Pain. Pain or numb?
It should be me, she was the one
I had her, she was mine
She likes tomato juice, miniatures
Black Louboutins in size 4 and a half
Tatler, oreo cheese Dairy Queen blizzard
Mint tea, kebab and omakase

10:42:23
Dance. Pole or Burlesque?
body rock hard, eyes on me
It should be me, down the aisle
Her lips always red, her eyes
curl up when she smiles
cat eye, plushies, flowers on fields
Books, panels, her wit sharp as knife

10:44:45
She should be walking out of church
Eyes stared at the door
I had no blue in Tiffany, red in Cartier
Blood on my hands, pyramid top
No time for her, I made it all for her
So she left me in the middle
Of an Hermes store

10:45:13
I saw her, white dress smiling
She didn't look at him
the way she looked at me
10 years ago, today, 10:45
First time I saw her, in a red dress
I opened the car door.
I crumpled my Loro Piana in the rain

10:46:34
I grabbed her, her mother screamed
Her best friend laughed, her dad sighed
The man reached for me,
I am not letting go
a very weird poem about a story of a guy and a girl
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