heart racing, can't catch my breath, hand rubbing against my thigh repeatedly, pulling my knees up to my chest and holding my body so tight, it hurts, i can't think logically, only fear and loss of control ensues. my own thoughts tear me apart and scare me.
the only real danger is in my thoughts, so how do i get out?
i have butterflies every single one unique in its own way beautiful delicate wings with intricate patterns and a variety of colors
each individually carved from stone by the anxious claws that embed themselves into my skin
i focus on those butterflies if only to distract me from my thoughts in my head from my tingling fingers turning numb from my pounding heart and from the air that is no longer in my lungs
i focus on those butterflies on the way their rough wings scrape along the inside of my stomach their screams from being crushed by those sharpened claws and the heavy sickening feeling they leave behind
You anxiously anticipate evening restlessness feeling the pain of resilience deep in your bones but dying fires from the sunset sky cool your eyes and a horizon line is sewn into your heart where blazing sunset colours go to rest after evening blues wash the sky and leave behind droplets of stars you fall asleep - dreaming of hope