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Jan 2019 · 422
New years love story
Danial John Jan 2019
New year, new problems
Same old ways to solve them

New year, new love
Same crippling thing that it does

New year, new life
Same thing, new ways to sacrifice

New year, new day
Same feelings when I see your face
When the new feels old maybe the old could still feel new?
Dec 2018 · 310
The Trap of Fate
Danial John Dec 2018
Sprung traps
An old song
Already sung that
Won't be long before I come back

Me mad at me
Business as usual
Not the only casualty
New and old, both fantasies

A slow growing strength
Shelters the ego
It's cancerous hate
But he knows it's only fate
Nov 2018 · 376
And sometimes
Danial John Nov 2018
Sometimes the pain
Masquerading as passing faith
Does nothing but leave a stain
And a permanent frown on your face

And sometimes the hurt
Under the surface where it lurks
Should be given wide berth
Because addressing it will only make things worse

Sometimes the hate
Waiting to reach the boiling point of rage
Puts you beside yourself into another state
A place where every choice is a mistake

But sometimes the love
Oddly sanctimonious in everything it does
Slithers through the detritus and picks you up
Makes you realise the cycle's not over but only just begun
And then we do it again...
Nov 2018 · 475
It was my birthday...
Danial John Nov 2018
...
...
...
And she didn't even say hi.

...
...
...
I couldn't seem to say goodbye.

...
...
...
I met another for the night.

...
...
...
Still can't seem to get you out of my mind.
Aug 2018 · 747
Speaking Louder
Danial John Aug 2018
Damnation in a ****** nation.
Your thoughts are only your own if you don't say them.
From simple complexities to advanced basics.
We are an oxymoron and it's time to face it.
That or otherwise become complacent.
Then you'll have an excuse for when the human race ends and you're in the last placement.
Words to ears are not superior to feet to pavement.
Enough talk, only action can save us.
Aug 2018 · 301
Lonesome Truth
Danial John Aug 2018
All the sad lonely people
Trudge along
Alone frome cradle to grave
Life's a sad, sad song

Goodbye
Goodbye
I won't miss you
Goodbye

If love is blind
Hate can truly see
Be careful of where you aim
Because eventually it's where you'll be

Truth is stranger than fiction
Fiction is better than you
You are not who you were
And that is the truth
Aug 2018 · 431
God's plan?
Danial John Aug 2018
You made me belive in things unseen, like God and fate.
You also filled me with nothing but disgusting, rotten hate.

I now know there IS a higher power.
And I hope some day it is destroyed, dismembered, and devoured
Aug 2018 · 159
Miss ya
Danial John Aug 2018
****...
I still wish I could be near who you were.
But...
You're so far away.
And...
I keep telling myself I'm over you.
Yet...
I'm not sure if that's completely true.
Danial John Aug 2018
I stand stunned, reminiscing all too recent events, at their very location, just to see how it felt...



After the wreck, I looked back... just for a moment. I couldn't help myself.
I saw what it was... And it was you, but  yet someone else.

I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it with my own two eyes.
I guess it's true what they say, "you never truly step in the same stream twice."



I walk away with a smile and think, "oh, how nice!"
In hindsight, the grass actually was greener on the other side.
Aug 2018 · 191
Why is it...
Danial John Aug 2018
... That every woman I've trusted and loved has hurt and used me?
Aug 2018 · 560
A Sad, Pathetic, Mean Poem
Danial John Aug 2018
Please just hate me.
At least then I could move on.
Being stuck in between worlds...
Feels so wrong.

What am I saying?
You don't even read this **** anymore.
Yet you got me into it, mi amor.
Hey, Baby, ante up and slay me.

I know, I put a lot of pressure on you.
But you should know the truth.
It's only because YOU made me insane for you.
And THAT'S the truth.

But... Whatever. Nobody gives a ****.
Least of all you.
That much
I'm sure of.

I'm just waiting for the day.
OD.
Slip away.
Set my soul free.

No more problems
No more worries
No more love
No more pain

Sometimes I wish I hadn't known you in the first place.
I'm so selfish I guess...
Danial John Aug 2018
I'm sorry...
I've been on one.
But just because I love you,
Doesn't make me awful.

One thing I've been,
Is hella thoughtful.
Pushing and pulling WAY too hard...
It's only cuz I want you.

No...
I need you.
At least if imma be complete.
I'm in desperate need of a redo I think.

I read you... And you me.
We run on a pair of graphic stories.
And the summation is:
Water circling down the kitchen sink.

Enough playing.
Are you willing or no?
Cuz I'm about ready to go.
Sooooo...

Do you wanna take a chance and let this whole thing unfold?
I could talk myself in circles... No... Spirals for hours if I let myself. I just wish I could talk with you, like we used to. I miss you.
Aug 2018 · 500
It feels like
Danial John Aug 2018
It feels like...
We haven't seen each other in a week,
Spoken in a month,
Shared a smile in a year.

It feels like...
I've been going with no sleep, running on E,
Lost without your love,
Only guided by the fear.

It feels like...
I miss what it used to be,
I could never have enough,
Just wanna see you smile from ear to ear.

It feels like...
A mystery,
Love,
Joy and cheer.
Jul 2018 · 2.7k
D.E.D
Danial John Jul 2018
**** or be killed
                  Killer be killed

         For they pray
                           For their prey
                                    For they're prey
Jul 2018 · 1.9k
That Feeling (Us)
Danial John Jul 2018
That feeling
When you don't know what to say
That feeling
When you don't want to stay

That feeling
When you think you're in love
That feeling
When someone breaks your trust

That feeling
When day fades into night
That feeling
When you're tired of the fight

That feeling
When you finally understand
That feeling
When you stop giving a ****

That feeling
That you're feeling
That I'm feeling
That we're feeling

That feeling is us
When words don't quite do the feeling justice, you write poetry.
Jul 2018 · 672
Life is Work
Danial John Jul 2018
I'm a bartender
Scar-mender
Heart defender
On another ******
Ready for a hard winter
Never a pretender
Opposite of a large spender
Certainly not anyone's number one contender
The one who's better
Yet often told never
Jul 2018 · 356
Friends Don't Kiss
Danial John Jul 2018
A friend
An end
Over extend
Do it over again

Chances
More than glances
Is it magic
Mental dances

Dirt
The hurt
More than you deserve
Such a flirt

My love
You're a drug
Enough
Squash me like a bug

Sight
No longer in flight
Future bright
I'd make it right

Ruin
Too soon
Not human
What am I doing

Please trust
Things rust
The deepest cut
Wouldn't stop my love
So many chances waisted
Jul 2018 · 591
Addiction
Danial John Jul 2018
My friend burns slow
I put her to my lips and draw
then exhale smoke
The tar stains my teeth and lungs.
I enjoy her presence because she makes me feel young.
Jul 2018 · 238
I See the Truth
Danial John Jul 2018
Subject myself to the topic
Masochism and apathy
Misanthropic logic
I'm past living, beyond being happy

Houses smell like carrion
Clothes feel like rags
Waist no time caring
Only my soul needs a bath

Everyone gather around as I bend over
So you can
Kiss
My
***
Jul 2018 · 355
Payment
Danial John Jul 2018
I have suffered God's wrath
Punishments for my sins
Fate be we crossed paths
You're ment to tear me from within

I see now I deserve it
Reap the fruits of my karma
I still seem to think you're worth it
Even if you choose to forget our love

You're perfect
Cursed to be froze just below heaven.
Jul 2018 · 1.3k
(Fuck)-feels
Danial John Jul 2018
Fire flies undulating in rhythm with staccato lightning flashes.
Campfires that have smoldered down into cinders and ashes.
Scintillating swaths of planets and stars that illuminate the night sky.
In my moment of time these sights and more have brought you to mind.
When ya got feels, ya got feels.
Danial John Jul 2018
You say you love me
But I'm sure I love you more
You sleep in your bed
And I sleep on the floor

I share my dreams and heart
They're all I have to offer
It seems you enjoy tearing them apart
And making me feel awful

I know you don't mean to
I can see it in your eyes
But nothing you say or do
Could make me forget your lies

Do you remember the night
When you showed my your scars
I told you they made me sad
I wish I could take our sorrow and cast it to the stars

Then you and I could live in a heaven on earth.
I've given you everything I have. Please give me a chance.
Jul 2018 · 563
Dreams Shattered
Danial John Jul 2018
I shared my dream with you
It wasn't easy for me
Then you gave up
Told me you had to get real

It was a mistake trusting you
Thought I could share my dream
But for you it wasn't enough
How do you think that makes me feel

I don't give a **** what you do
I must have a disease
I thought if we shared our love
It might help me heal
I can't belive you...
Jul 2018 · 474
Thoughts
Danial John Jul 2018
Nothing's ever good enough
Everything *****
I'm not good enough
I ****
I want to die
You don't want to be around me
Rather be with him
Or him
Or him
I asked you why
Told me I wasn't a tool
What do you take me for
A fool
Told me it wasn't me, it is you
But I don't belive
I don't want to breathe
I just want to leave
You in the past
Because you hurt
And I blame it all on you because I'm a ****
Clearly this isn't worth
Effort
Love
Work
This is what you wanted right? I'm giving up.
Jul 2018 · 395
Three and Seven
Danial John Jul 2018
He needed distance and clear mind
She was there
They were sick and in need of something new
It started when he began to stare
She sensed something special too
In due time
What to do

She just wanted Souls to be intertwined
They could be something more paired
He was in her heart and mind
Caught, ensnared
There was nothing that the two couldn't do
He was lost, the two never fully shared
She was scared, but wanted to

Cruel is time
He was fooled
She couldn't seem to learn that love is blind
Tests of time, they couldn't fare
He loved her and didn't mind
Didn't care
Two perfect halves of a whole, I miss you
2+2+3=7
1+9+9+7+1+3=3
7+3=1
Jul 2018 · 268
Never
Danial John Jul 2018
I asked her to be with me
She said never
I told her I loved her
She said whatever

Left alone in the woods
Gone with him
She expected me to stay put
I wish I could

Now I have to leave
Now truly I see
I've always loved you
But you've never loved me
Jul 2018 · 277
First Words pt. 1
Danial John Jul 2018
Just **** me already.
Love is pain.
Me and you could be plenty.
Please help me feel sane.

I want to be with you forever.
Need your shining embrace.
You make everything better.
Around you I feel safe.
Jul 2018 · 298
Easy
Danial John Jul 2018
I'm a puppet
A marionette
A toy tossed
Easy to forget

I'm a foolish kid
An imbecile
With half his wits
Easy to dismiss

I'm a love sick dog
A sitting duck
Stuck in mud
Easy target to hit

I'm a human being
With real ****** feelings
Who's had enough
Easy to love
Just who do you think I am?
Danial John Jul 2018
Wanted to forget
You wouldn't let me

Got it for this
No matter how you test me

Am I coming or going?
Are you pushing or pulling?

Hours spent not knowing
This or that, please, just commit fully
Jun 2018 · 341
Crossing paths (Goodbye)
Danial John Jun 2018
You                                                          Me
You                                                        Me
  You                                                      Me
   You                                                    Me
    You                                                  Me
     You                                                Me
      You                                              Me
        You                                          Me
          You                                      Me
            You                                  Me
              You                              Me
                You                          Me
                  You                      Me
                     You                Me
                        You          Me
                           You    Me
                              You
                           Me You
                        Me       You
                     Me              You
                  Me        Us        You
                     Me               You
                        Me         You
                           Me   You
                              Me
                          You Me
                       You       Me
                    You             Me
                 You                   Me
              You                         Me
            You                             Me
          You                                 Me
        You                                     Me
      You                                         Me
     You                                           Me
    You                                             Me
   You                                               Me
  You                                                 Me
You                                                   Me
You                   Goodbye                  Me
Formats not perfect, but then again neither is life...
Jun 2018 · 351
Self defense
Danial John Jun 2018
Who would have though that the happiest days of my life would also be the worst.
Deep down inside my chest something has been growing... and soon I'll burst.
I do not understand why it's here, but I do know that it hurts.
What at first seemed a blessing turned out to be a curse.

This insidious beast, talks to me in my sleep.
It tells me lies, until nothing but false hope fills my eyes.
At first I tried to feed it, and when that didn't work I tried to free it.
Why won't it just let me be?

Still, there it stayed, in my chest... growing bigger and stronger day by day.
Even now, I can still feel it's foul poison lingering in my veins.
What once brought me joy now only brings me  pain.
I can't even remember when it infested my soul, but still I curse that day.

God please make it go away.
I am a man, yet I am only human, and I now see my problem has but one solution.
I must **** the love in my heart before it kills me.
I must relieve some of this woeful misery, it's the only way.

It hurts me to say, but I have my reasons.
The most important of which is simply self defense.

I must **** it before it kills me
**** it before it kills me
**** it, **** me
Self defense
May 2018 · 387
PLEASE READ ME
Danial John May 2018
[anonymous woman who definitely knows who she is],

I've wanted to say this to you for a long time. I guess I just haven't had the composure to say it to your face. Suppose I still don't, otherwise I wouldn't have to say this here.

When I came back home and really got to know you, you changed my life. I wasn't looking for or expecting anything like you. I've been hopelessly lost and depressed for years. Immediately I could tell you were different. Something about you makes me feel alive. I like me better when I'm with you. You are the most beautiful free spirited woman I've ever met, and I've met many. Even had relations with a few (believe it or not).

I truly want to know... Did you feel the same feeling I did? If you didn't, I'll accept that. But, every fiber of my being, and every sign from the universe tells me you are something special. Something that I should never let go of. And I'll defy anyone telling me elsewise, whether you or my dad, because I know what love is.

And you say you love me like a brother, I respect that. And in a way, I love you like a sister. But I can't deny that I feel more than that. I want to be there for you, be with you... Always. Regardless of how you feel, I will be.

I get that you've had a rough life, the roughest. And I want to help you in any way I can. I want to show you off to anybody who cares to pay attention.
And can you really blame me? I mean, you're beautiful. Your sense of humor is amazing. And you care so much about others, always seeing the best in people. And most importantly, you make me feel like the luckiest person to walk God's green earth. You inspire me to be a better man in every sense of the word. Your blue eyes peirce right through me. Your voice makes my smile. Being near you helps me sleep at night.

As a beautiful young woman, you have choices. And I understand that I might not be the best looking guy, or even the most capable. But I DARE anyone to test my resolve or care more for you than I do.

I love you so much it hurts. Regardless of how you feel about me, I want the very best for you... And remember, every once and awhile, just breathe.
I love you.
Just being real with you.
May 2018 · 344
Eve's ill
Danial John May 2018
Evil in a needle
Evil in a pipe
Evil in the veins of people
Evil that gets you right
May 2018 · 301
Judoschool
Danial John May 2018
They say the heart grows fonder with distance
And I guess it's true
Because whenever you're gone I feel black and blue
But the distance can be so much more
I can see you across the room
Yet so far away
I want to be with you every single day.
I'm sorry for my fantasies
Maybe that's all they are
But I felt a connection,
Thought you did too
I don't remember writing this. That's weird right? Also, I have no clue what the f**k Judoschool means.
Apr 2018 · 315
F. O. D. A
Danial John Apr 2018
The power that possesses,
The young and restless,
Ahead,
To both death marches and weddings.
Did you question the message you were fed?
You should just seek warm bedding...
I guess.
So,
Is it the beginning of the ending?
Or just the end of the beginning?
Rotting,
From the inside,
Is youth's defining essence.
Can you smell the corpses rotting? A cubicle a coffin. There are few things that can keep a shell like me walking. Do you understand me when I'm talking?
Apr 2018 · 384
Divine essence lost
Danial John Apr 2018
I am severely depressed.
Every day is a struggle just to get out of bed.
They tell me: don't worry, just take your meds.
And yet...

I don't mind the cold,
It seeps into me, down to my bones.
The chill in my soul forms icicles in my nose,
They drip down my throat.

A pancaked atlas.
The weight of the world condensed, flattened.
A singularity of sadness.
Unsure of how or why this happened.

My only misgiving is that
Something important to me has gone missing.
Man's purpose, what makes him divinely great
Unfortunately, I've lost my ability to create.
I can no longer visualize my will into being. ******* depression. Why must I be obsessed with the numb pain you bring.
Mar 2018 · 400
Thankful
Danial John Mar 2018
Bills and taxes,
Sorrow and sadness.
All on my lonesome,
I couldn't handle half this.

Jobless and without a whip,
Lonely and in need of friends.
If it was just me,
I would end this ****.

So I'm thankful.
I love my family,
Chosen and otherwise.
Help their lives as they have mine
Love you all.
Mar 2018 · 399
Thoughts I have
Danial John Mar 2018
I am all out of inspiration, my life a desolate hell.

I don't feel well, on a precipice might just end all my relations.

Desperation to make it cease, before I too am just a shell.

Maybe he fell, or maybe he was pushed by the temptation.




Either way, he knew something... A secret.

Couldn't tell anyone, there was no speaking.

Seeking an easier way to explain. Possibly with feelings?

Pealing faces away, shouldn't do any harm.




Never existed? That's wishful thinking.

A fistful of change, loaded and ready to meet the misfit's mesure.

Yet the virus was still there, slinking towards its next victim.

Another, and another, and yet another. It goes on forever and forever. No forgetting.
Mar 2018 · 351
She fell
Danial John Mar 2018
She fell into a hole.
Is she still alive?
Still there?
I ask her, she doesn't know.
Mar 2018 · 300
Once again
Danial John Mar 2018
Perfection

Rejected

Redirected

Dejected


Introspection

Hecti­c

Reflection

Resting


Question

Detective

Lessons

Genetics
Circles
Mar 2018 · 259
Just so you understand
Danial John Mar 2018
Just so you don't misconstrue
I still care deeply about you
It's just self preservation that makes me push away
Still, we can be cordial, I'll be there on that day

The day when you decide to put the demons at bay.
You can keep ******* around til then.
However, be warned, if you don't try then they'll always win.
I hope to see you again, the real you, someday.
Mar 2018 · 294
No joke
Danial John Mar 2018
No joke
**** me please
I have lost hope
I want to leave

It's all a game
Should be having fun
It's all the same
I've had enough

Make it stop
I can see the end
**** God
**** a friend
Mar 2018 · 292
Nobody
Danial John Mar 2018
Nobody seems to care
Working so hard
Yet going nowhere
The system is flawed

Be patient, wait
No
Put in work
If you want to escape

A man melted away
Just a shell
The world will pay
You will join me in Hell
Mar 2018 · 244
Whatever
Danial John Mar 2018
Whatever, I don't need your thoughts and opinions.
They mean very little, but I stop and listen.
You're missing the point of this riddle
We call living.

You do you
And imma just do what I please.
If you don't like that,
Catch 5 to the teeth.

Cuz I'm done trying to help others,
When nobody is willing to do the same for me.
**** all y'all.
The world is a disease.
Mar 2018 · 339
It
Mar 2018 · 281
Toxic
Danial John Mar 2018
I love you,
That's why I ask
If there's a demon inside you (and I think there is).
We'll kick its ***.

However, if you don't let me try
Well, then I guess that's fine.
Just know I will not wait any longer.
Everyday your demon grows stronger.

I see you lose.
I watch you use.
The way it makes you
Makes me sick.

And if you think you know
The subject of this poem,
I'm sure you don't.
I'm letting go.

I'll always be here,
If you're ever ready to face your fears.
The fact is that on your own you can't stop it.
Til you're ready, leave me alone, you're toxic.
Mar 2018 · 331
Tool (Spaces in Places)
Danial John Mar 2018
Used                        (used)
U sed us                 (you said us)
E dus                      (eat us)
Ed u sed                 (and you said)
Used                       (used)
Different ****
Mar 2018 · 422
Here
Danial John Mar 2018
Bare unto me thy demons,
Thy trials and tribulations,
Thy pities and sarrow,
Thy fears,
Thy issues,
Thy problems,
Thy confusions,
Thy anxieties,
All shall be exercised.

Exalt with me thy dreams and aspirations,
Thy goals,
Thy joys,
Thy ecstasy,
Thy enthusiasm,
Thy truths and certainties,
Thy love and compassion,
Thy radiance,
All shall be glorified.

Thou art worthy of this and more.

I beseech thee,
Allow trust to be thy emperor,
Empathy thy empress.

Share with me... fully and unabashedly.
I am here. Always will be.
Mar 2018 · 691
A way away
Danial John Mar 2018
In a land of 10000 poems I roam
Wondering if I'll ever find my way home.
I'm all alone.
Does anybody hear me?

Empathy pierces the fog... Nearly.
My visions are unclear... Clearly.
I pull monsters from within, searing.
I attempt to cauterize old wounds.

Also new.
They oft set my world askew.
Don't know what to do.
Will you help?

Writing ciphers in digitized pen, not felt.
Every word a wound, I stopped for my health.
Twisted and turned around, is this hell?
I must find a way...


A way away from myself.
No excaping who you are. At least not for long.
Mar 2018 · 321
Down I go
Danial John Mar 2018
A slow rumbling
   Deep down

         F
           A
              L
                 L
                    I
                      N
                         G

Tumultuous tumbling
   Head first into the abyss.
From happy to sad and back again
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