I feel like a projection
From a distant planet
Seeing everything from afar

I'm here
I'm seen
I'm heard

But I'm not felt

And I want to feel

As much as this life can give me
So even though right now I'm far away
Maybe I'll get there, someday

You make me feel so blue.

Deep as the oceans.

The Aphotic Zone of the heart.

Even so, I would not change my feelings.

For you also light up my life.

Transforming me into a beautiful sunrise after midnight.

Do you feel it?
As if we're drawn together,
like soulmates.
Maybe you do,
I wont ever know,
but I feel it always ends the same.
Maybe we're not meant to be together.
Perhaps it's always been this one sided...
despite the words you've said,
no matter how we lived.
God and priest,
maiden and servant,
in a war somewhere,
friends.
I don't think we've ever ended up together,
isn't that sad, my dear, Aphrodite?
I suppose it's for the best, darling.

Letting you go to be happy.
A worthy cause in my heart.
If only it didn't hurt so,
but I can let you go.
We can remain how we were
I can be happy this way too.
On that day,
I became a pearl
instead of a rose.

Eat
1 2 3
Seeds from fruit trees

Love
I've missed you
My cherished one

Soon
You will be
With us again

Cold
Is the earth
Beneath soft snow

But
Way down here
The embers glow

Warm
Are we, beloved
Feelings freely flowing

Waves
Crashing into rocks
Passionate and fierce

Eat
4 5 6
Cross the river Styx

Rip me apart
and cart me off
to somewhere unknown

Cut through the top
plunge fingers deep
disgusting, wet, and slick

Rip out the innards
make hollow
for your own pleasure

Unmoving
it sits and waits
for the rest to come

The carving
the face always
comes out ugly

At last
light the fire
and watch it glow

In the bright flames
of a dark night
they'll be left there

Until they're rotting
scrape up the remains
and dump the body

You're not welcome here

There may be posters
on the outside of the building
with your face on them sayin
"Wanted"
but that ain't an invitation

Pushing past the swinging twins
strutting in, without a care
like you've done nothing,
as if everyone in the room
doesn't want to **** ya

For all the things you've done
they wouldn't need the pay
it'd be a service to mankind,
plenty of folks are glad to put a bullet in yer head

But Darlin'
ya always did have a sweet mouth
I'd love to see you talk your way outta this one

And as soon as you go to speak
I can see it plain as day

BANG

You can't always speak.

It's tiring,
to say the same spiel all the time,
lying isn't much better,
but the truth isn't an option.

It would hurt,
and we're already miles apart from where we began,
and I don't want to live without you in my life.

So sometimes I can't.

Please,
let's just sit here in silence a little longer.

So I can choke down the misery,
and smile for you.

Like a friend,
instead of someone who so hopelessly adores you.

I'm making love to myself.

In ways you never could,
Never would,
And bringing pleasure.

I haven't hit the peak yet,
But you never got me there either;

And at least this way
I'm going somewhere.

The problem is
if you want someone to talk to you
you can't wait for them to
for they might never do so
go out and make the first move
for they might be doing the same as you

Sharp and dangerous.
That's what you think when you hear about them.

"They'll **** you quicker than you could blink"

"You'll hear the soft ****** of charms, spurs, and then it's over"

"The gunslinger- now he's straight from hell, no one could out draw that man, no matter what gun you have"

"I've always heard you had to watch the swordsman, he's like a ghost, never know where he'll be"

Now, I knew next to nothing about them.
Everyone they visited usually ended up dead.

Hard to confirm.

Standing here and looking at them though...

These soft men, all smiles, joking, relaxed.

I don't know about the stories but they're sharp and dangerous alright, etching their mark on my heart.

They aren't known for asphyxiation, but they sure stole my breath.

if only you knew how dangerous I was,
a poisonous cloud infecting everything;
would you still weep for me then?
tears soft
and hands rough
but these touches gentle

they warn you
how I cut-
thorns on a rose,
the tighter you grasp
the more it hurts;
so drop me

except,
you always return.
am I that alluring?
worth all this pain?
if you think so
then stay....

Standing here in the heat
talking upon asphalt
you're light and joking
a breeze in the stale summer's air
then suddenly
grey and rain
it's sad and hard, you don't need to be tough
retreat to the cave before it is too late
we take shelter here now
why are you apologizing?
don't worry mother, I made it rain last week too
nothing is wrong
you think we're safe
but we are already burnt

your love is toxic

my lungs collapsing

beneath the weight of such ugly feelings

so much like a rock

abrasive and heavy

are the words that spill from your mouth

like a faucet of filth

the pressure building

bright red blossoms

like a blow to the face

The whispers of flesh on flesh
The pressure of you
The slide of fingers down my neck
The breath against a crook
The warmth radiating between us
The blood rushing
The hand on my back
The contact

"It Comes At Night"
(Desire) First renewed
Under the silver light (of the moon)

"A Quiet Place"
(A) Fatal Attraction
There will be blood (he hopes)

Venom (drips from his tongue)
(as he forces open her) Jaws
******

(the) Heat
"Let Him Have It"
Primal Fear (is all she knows)

"The Usual Suspects"
Goodfellas (they claim)
(making her play) The Game

Over time you'd carved out space.
Your current eroding my toughest stone.
Gutting me for all to see.
For so long I'd forgotten what it was like to be without you,
But you put up dams and barriers, diverting your water;
and now, Colorado, you've dried up.
Sometimes it'd rain and I thought that you might return.
After so much time together we became synonymous.
How would I exist without you?

Now I know.
You may have cut deep into me.
Leaving your mark for all to see.
They still come for me, even when you're gone,
To look upon my beautiful layers and vibrant colors.


The pit you whittled out is vast but you could never fill what was.
I'm left with nothing but the dry, harsh heat.
Don't come back to this canyon.
There's no room.

Sometimes I wonder
Is this even real?
what if it's a dream,
a coma,
what if we're already dead?

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
*******.

There she goes

Girls file into line
Three by three
Knee length skirts

Down the aisle

Tell me yours and I'll tell you mine
Prayers morning, noon, and night
Careful now, They're prepared to smite

Up the Stairs

Now we dine
And then off to bed
One "lucky" girl gets to practice head

The tallest tower

She's had too much sacramental wine
Hands touched and caressed
And she felt far from blessed

Down she jumps

Touched by filthy swine
"what a horrible disaster"
Her eulogy given by that same pastor

The Devil moves on

Clerks (and the)
"Felon"
(and) A Serious Man

12 Angry Men (sit)
"A Few Good Men"
(in the) City Of Men

The Fugitive (seems)
"Fearless"
(stands with a) Smile

"Scent Of A Woman"
Presto (he says)
(and there would be no) Law Abiding Citizen

"The Gods Must Be Crazy"
(to let) Someone Like Him
Getaway (free)

The Sting (is that)
"Cell 211"
(remains) Empty

Dangerous
Sticky red trickles down her stick
Another beating today

Oh how it's my fault
To dare speak of heart felt truth
Tempting you away from "justice"

Just remember
I may be battered and bruised behind bars
But it's you who broke the law

soft tears cresting in eyes

oh how they've hurt you so

dearest one, let this pass

in pain, fury, the deepest swells of sadness

let them wash over you again and again

until you are calmed

smoothed out until new

you will prove victorious

and they will meet their end

Pretty
Little girls
Run home
Into my arms

Crying
About
The man
They met tonight

He
Was always
A monster
Just hidden inside

They
Had bled
Blue and Red
Having Known him

If
I could
I would
**** for them

I
Would take
It all
For those girls

My
Sweet, funny
Precious friends
Deserved much more

But
All I
Can do
Is be here

Listen
To how
They weep
And feel disgust

Their
Bodies no
Longer theirs
But now spectacles

"If
It really
Happened" someone
Mocks them cruelly

"It's
No big
Deal" another
Sneers so violently

It
Happened
Whether they think
So or not

And
I am
Here for you
My dear sisters

Feelings overflowing and spilling out of the fountain.

It warms me, to know you care so deeply.

I'm sorry.

My tears may spill like raindrops,

But I will lay down my flesh time and time again,

Until every inch of me is littered with scars;

And I'm sinking beneath the waves of worry, ache, and sadness.

If it means I can one day find someone,

Who feels the same as me,

Then I will die a thousand times.

I'm running out
and drying up
you've left me no more tears to cry
love

gone is our time
my soul a stone
stuck beneath waves
of emotional toll

so please
get out
let me dream of something more
pleasant

I can't do this forever
and sooner or later
it's you or me
who will be dust

so much to give
but so closed off

a glass
filled to the brim
waiting to spill

others take tentative sips
or pour it out completely

I just want to be savored
drank slowly over time
enjoyed through all seasons

while my heart may be punctured
oozing out love to anyone who looks
my bones are hard and sharp
waiting to poke through this flesh
and stab if need be

to want to love
so freely
to want to receive
the same

you'd think it'd be easier
to crack open this ribcage

Time to fall back into the murky waters again

You did so good

Splishing along the surface

trying to keep yourself afloat

making all those luscious bubbles

but it's time to sink below

and rest.

And it's funny,
As I stand here
Bent over this sink
With tears streaking
All down my face
And my ribs are so sore
As I ***** some more,
That I think of you

White blossoms with red seeping in.
My quiet love was yours from the beginning.
You are the air in my lungs, the light in my eyes.
Your voice sets off a bombardment of adoration in my heart.
Your words a beautiful curse.
I dreamt of getting lost in you.
I regret to inform you that it hurts
to leave the lights on for no one,
and that there's no heavier burden
than the weightless emptiness of the soul.
You.
I know you'll never love me in the way that I desire.
Your happiness is enough, my dear.

The air, saturated with a putrid smell.

Foul, like a dumpster in summertime.

They're monsters, skulking around in the Dead of Night.

Leaving, a sickness in their wake.

You're revolting.

The way you take.

Gnashing your teeth.

Trying, to pluck out little hearts.

Attempting, to creep up thighs.

Don't touch me, with those slimy fingers.

Go before you die, rotting beast.

We are not a cemetery.

Pluck one
Then two
Drag them out
As long as you want
Play the song of their hearts
Feelings as tight as you tuned them
Draw them in
So taunt
Until the chord breaks

Any time I think of her
my jaw locks
and my teeth press
into a viscous snarl
as if I've become some beast

And I would bite
with words I've held tight
sinking teeth into flesh
and getting it where it hurts

Maybe I am a rabid animal
who's too dangerous to trust
but what does that mean when
you're the one who made me this way

It's two a.m. and I'm lying in bed
trying to get to sleep
trying to get to you
or maybe to things that used to be

I lie wide awake
looking into the darkness
my mind is static
blank but buzzing
with thoughts
with feelings
with memories

The window is open
my feet are sticking out
they're as cold as the tight clench of my heart at the thought of you
I cover to warm up
but the iciness remains