#hopeless poems on Hello Poetry

3h

Nowadays

All I have,
All I can give,
is my time,
and my poetry,
I can give you
all my hours,
I can immortalize you
with my words,
and have you run
miles in my mind,
making you my world,
leaving me -
hopelessly hoping that
that would be enough.
It never is though,
is that really enough
to afford love?

#afford #love #enough #hope #hopeless #hours #poetry #give #miles #mind

21h

Shedding

He's no longer human, but a shell of what remains.
The failures of life stare into his soul through the reflection of his son.
Those brown eyes beam with let down and pity for what use to be.
Which is, his hero is now without powers, and utterly defeated.
Death and depression haunt him, his true self is gone, all this time he's been shedding

When you discover what life can turn you into

#life #hopeless #death #sorrows #hope #light #dark #peace

2d

and no one heard them

I see writing on the walls,
etched up across old toilet stalls,
from people clinging to it all
to people too afraid to fall.

What they don’t know will never hurt them;
it’s clear that love has never burned them.
Heard of lessons; never learned them.
Though, pain apparent; no one heard them.

etchings into trees and toilet walls are only an attempt to cling on to what we are afraid of losing forever

back in the uk, wish that I wasn’t

Sorry about the punctuation, it’s been a long night

#truth #forever #never #loss #fear #pretence #naive #hopeful #reality #hopeless

2d

Blind To Me

( written in recovery )
_

I see the pain
see the beauty
see the fear
the love
the sorrow
see the joy

I see the mistakes
see the success
the struggle
see the triumph
the need

I see these in others

I seem to find
the words to say
words to sooth
words to console
to acknowledge
encourage

words to help them
stay the path
or find a way

from somewhere
they come to me

but in the mirror of introspection
my self reflection
I cannot see

if I am so damned wise
why am I
so blind to me

_

rob kistner © 2018

Contemplation on the difficulty in seeing one's self clearly, the unfortunate ease with which we self-delude. Things that can seem so clear, so obvious when looking out can become so clouded, distorted, often impossible to see when looking within.

#introspection #delusion #wisdom #mistakes #blindness #helping #hopeless #counsel #advice #follish

3d

weak.

there's no time for love
and no room for consolation

but

there's time for disappointment
and room for failure

#weak #disappointment #failure #lack #hardships #done #hopeless #stuck #useless #broken

7d

stuck

the words i'll say and the things i'll do,
caused by my tearing up from the inside
and repeated lines still unsatisfied,
no one will know they were caused by you.

and these are the things they won't forget,
they'll never know that behind my mask
i had been broken like thin glass
and every minute i knew i'd regret.

they won't know how you drained my tears,
i tried everything, tried to leave but you pulled
me back in, i tried the best i could.
please let me be somewhere away from here.

what is it about the abused that makes them stay?
i've trapped myself in what seems to be
a neverending abyss and i can't see.
i hope that maybe i can find my way.

it's been odd.

#lost #stuck #hope #hopeless #alone #lonely #regret

7d

Depths

Underneath the water, I can barely feel my fingertips.
A cold so deep, my breaths solidify in my lungs.
The water vibrates and ripples with the sound of my slowing heart.
Something in me won’t give up, won’t give in, even though I will it to.
I pray it to. I beg it to.

Who am I fighting?
The tide? The current? Myself?
The glimmer of your face reflecting down, down, down to where I lie?

But when I reach out a hand to caress your watery skin, you disperse into murky green.

#water #drowning #hopeless

Oct 6

the tides were too strong

you haven’t been sleeping enough,
I see your eyes flickering in the dark
the bed has been nothing but rough
the visions of her won't stop

the stars have dimmed you say,
replaced with a deafening gray
a sorrowful sight it was

wishful that the ocean will calm for you,
but the storm is pushing through,
it’s deep and there’s nowhere to go,
an armada of emotions sinking painfully slow

no one to turn to
her words cloud the sea
never again become blue
how will you flee?

the waves does not allow you to sail through
no lull in the night
a squall behind you
a searing pain
ensues

#sea #deep #drowning #sinking #hopeless #her #drifting #tides #waves

Oct 6

Moving on

Loving her was like
Being in headphones
Listen to your brand new and
Favorite cheesy song
Full of her dulcet words
And melisonant melody
I grokked nothing

I used to fell my heart
Wandering in fantasy place
My spirit lavitating in paradize sky
Of her thoughts
Squinting a pierced glance
With pleasure and admiration
Of her love

I felt like she had made for me
I used to eye her in
My dreams
Together flying with wings
diving in daisy full of drainage
In form of the clouds
Smiling like bitten eggplants on top
I thought she was my answer
Until she comes and
Take them away from
My poor pate
And threw them away in horizon
Loneliness was the only mate
She left me with.

Now i have a backpack full of
sorrow and pain
A bottle on the left side sac full
Of her lies and promises
Inside there is a book of our memories
Hanging with all staffs we did together
And a wax match in left back pocket of my jeans
And a black shovel in my right hand
I need to burn them all to ashes
And dig a long hole
And bury them painstakingly
To make sure they never haunt in
My mind

Cause i've realized
Maybe i need to love myself
First
Before learning how to
unlove the immersing her
And make her my sturdy confinement
So i have to follow my heart
And put the rest in God hands
Cause i know my God
Always win.

#movingon #love #sadness #hopeless