***** and sweat,
Hunched and broken,
By the toilet bowl
I will flush you out
Until the only thing left of you
Of us
Is the tears in my eyes
And the acid in my throat

I know
Sometimes I say the wrong things
Sometimes I’m places
I shouldn’t be…
But why must I pay a fee
For your love?

I gave with no charge
Just for you to be
Who you are
But now I see
Yours was never free
It was just built on lies

What was it that led me to your eyes?
Was it the warm tones of green
Or maybe the hope
That a new light
Would spark from beneath darkness

But I’m too poor to pay
For something so expensive
So I’ll be moving on
while tears replace the hole you left
Why couldn’t it have been love?

When I feel
Inadequate
I get the urge to
Cut
Like slicing my
Arm
Would make me
Worthy
Would make me
Enough
As if
Devouring
My flesh would
Prove
That I am as they
Say
I am
Not good
Enough
Not good
Enough.
No.
I'm
More
Than
Enough.

As the last grain hits the glass basin,
I know it was all for nothing.

Another night
Spent wishing for change
But it’s as far away
As the stars in the night
You can see it
Yet it feels so unreachable.

don't make me fall in love with you,
because i know i will;

and my hopes of you feeling
the same way -
i have no right to feel.

don't make me fall in love with
someone else;
stop me - when i do;

and when my hopes of you remain
the same way -

then i know it will always be you.