Drunk
left me
in a bed
shared
with the bottle
blacked out
from all
the moments
that did not
make it to
memories

I found myself
in song
tip toeing
on notes
bridged by lines
of memories
connected...  

I move with the eye
as it reads them
strums them
brings them to reality
and all I seem to be
doing to going
forward

Sometimes stepping
on familiar notes
"that's the chorus"
my mind says
"you know these steps like the back
of your hand"

and others
I find myself catching up
with the new tempo
as I spread my arms
to find my
new
balance

Talk me into
hypnosis

Walk me into
dreams

Take me into
your world

For mine
exists on paper
and yours...
I plea
to see

I looked on the bright side
and felt the warm wave
of challenge
caress
my
f
a
c
e

It is only fair
that life
takes time
away from me
and barters it
with
moments
I visit
in my mind
from time to time

I have never
heard my thoughts
sing so loudly as
they did when
they went dancing with yours
in complete and
utter silence
the moment
your eyes
landed on mine

Tame that fire
my darling
for they
say strike iron while
hot

Burn that flame
my darling
for they say
love is a burning
passion

The night air
prompted me
to act upon
my true inhibitions
versus
putting them to sleep
and oh the wonders
that the wishing
stars
foresaw

I drew a halo
over your head
to show
the world that side
and keep
the demons for me

You blind
your sight
with this
veil of expectations
but..
little do you know
that when I remove
it and kiss you
reality just tastes
sweeter and
sometimes
a bit sour

It was
more than
just a shared
bench
when
time
paused

Today
the sun showed me
my value
I shone
like a precious
stone
standing
alone

Every sigh
stitched itself
to the stars
that looked down on us
during those
sleepless nights
Wondering if
we were wondering
about them and their
promises to our wishes

For all
the curveballs
life pitched
.......
Thank You

"I think you
need to feel
this..." says intuition

"Can I censor it?
The movie seems
fine from my side"
says the heart

It is only
when a writer
is broken
that ink spills
from her cracks
to fall on paper

It's more
than just a look
when my
eyes forget
how to blink

For once
I'd like to see
your world
for mine
is already
naked
in pages
in front
of
your
eyes

Do not let them confine you
your words and guidelines clash
like enemies

Do not let them lead you
your words are as stubborn as a taurus
with the head of an aries

Do not let them **** you
your words can revive characters
that their ancestors encounters

Do not let them stress you
your words defeat the greatest of antidepressants
making prozac seem like candy

Do not let them attack you
your words shield their insults
leaving your core pure and true

Do not let them defeat you
your words are yours and yours alone
understanding is their problem

Do not simply do not give in
your words are your own
the worlds your create are your own
rules, no rules, chaos and mess
guidelines or no guidelines
the perk of being a writer
is that head of theirs
that rests on their shoulders
harnesses worlds, characters
lives, lovers, spirits
yearning to
taste paper
feel ink
and
be discovered

I have been
studying
the language of thuds
till a sailor
heard my heart
and deciphered
its tone

.. / -- .. ... ... / -.-- --- ..-

Warping
Words
Wonderfully
Within

Knitting
Knights
in
nights

Falling
Fully
Awake

(You)niform:
Remaining the same in all cases;
consistent; steady

Ok, let me get this straight..
actually no.
I don't want it straight..
straight never went .. straight
to what it's supposed to lead to

Let me get this curved?
maybe that would help
then again..
curved is straight with a dent
what if I have multiple
d             n                        s
    e                           t

Then let me get this dented?
ups and downs?
urgh... de ja vu...

Let me get this...
now..
that's more like it ...

I always showed you
how I shone
under the sun
but you never noticed
what happens
when I melted

Dated memories
date back
to dates
I want to date
some erase
and scotch you
in between to recreate
new dates in old dates

There is
a certain kind of
rush
my body feels
when I pull
my heart out of my chest
and place it
in front of you

Here's a call
for all those lost souls
trying to find their way
relax..no one does..

A call for those depressed
about about missed opportunities
that might have lead them
somewhere else
relax...regret nothing..

Here's a call for you
I know how you feel
unloved, in love with unreciprocated love
alone, lonely, isolated, drunk, voided,
relax... there's nothing wrong with you
because I too feel the same
.. you're not alone

I am her body
I am starving…
for attention

The last time she gave me a compliment
was the time the mirror was tilted towards the sun
and her rays wrote the words of beauty
very bright ..
so that her eyes could see

I am her body
a clingy companion unwanted
a friend-zoned partner.. with so much
life to give …
loved at once, and ignored many  
maybe if I jolt pain
she’d look at me..

I am her eyes
she doesn’t see
choses not to, her vision
distracted ..by …

the blue sky, attention like a goldfish
in a fishbowl, with all the blue,
but maybe this blue is new..

I am her ribs,
they show, that’s a good thing
but I am suffocating on the skin
that’s covered me too close
they layer me like sand dunes, sculpted by time
rubbing off by age, but
hey they show.. that’s a good thing..

I am her belly
breathing, many lovers loved…
hands laid on me, I felt the caress
and failed to warn her, it won’t last
I didn’t know.. I am sorry


I am her hands,
giving comfort, and warmth
fingerprints caved deeper, every birthday
she wrote, things her chords wouldn’t say
her hands guided… and (have been) deserted
loved and (have been) left
lifted and (have been) dropped
warmed and (have been) solo
gave and (have been) taken
warned and (have been) stabbed

I am her legs
gapped by less and less food
more and more steps
less .. more…
.. walks away…
counts calori……. steps

I am her mind..
a territory of landmines
placed by past experiences
sugarcoated with sprinkles
baked to perfection
the mastermind of the strategy
the lighthouse
for many .. but
not
her

I have loved
for the sake of
loving

feeling

d
      r
             i
                  f
                       t
                           i
                              n
                                  g
for the sake
of me
of you
of everything
just to enjoy
the feeling
of
f
  l
    o
       a
         t
            i
             n
                g

s   p   a   c   e   d  
every      o   n   c  e

in          a

w     h    i   l    e

Beyond your reflection
lies a wonderland
of psyche
....
here come closer
want a peek?
*locks eyes

The cat attacked the tree
everything came
falling down

The cat left
me picking up
the ornaments
and starting
all over again

Realizing that
I get a second chance
to decorate it
to put it together
again
in a different
way

*pauses and reflects
at healing in life

The heart has become
foreign to the knock
of love on its doors
It stored a doorbell

Vital
     Vivacious
           Vi
                b...b....b
                              rations
Shhh....shhhh....shhhh
                                    ake
                                             ache  
                                                  Br^ea^k
ribcages

When your eyes
make your brain
smile

That...

Listen,
poems read
differently
when you're close to the poet

Listen,
run your hands
across my pages
caress the dents
feel the depth in some
and the lightness in others

Listen,
come closer
place your ear
on my papers
listen to the waltz
my pencils do
with every
stride, every curve

Can my muses
be revolting with my sisters
while my pencil carves
its sorrows
on papers
wet with tears?

Someone told me
I feel too much...
like it's
a bad thing
like it's rain on beach day
like it's cold "hot cocoa"
like it's an incomplete "love letter"
like it's snowing on your vacation
//   it's a cold thanksgiving dinner
//   // a pimple on date night
//  //  your period on *** night
//  //  being broke on a Friday
and went on and on and on ... like
someone told me I feel too much
I said
Thank you, I am blessed

It took
an elevator ride
to realize
and notice
the ups and downs
of regular days
and that's a good thing
for my darling
you have not
stagnated
yet

You exorcized
my being
by leaving me harshly
through every tear
that left my eye lid

I felt it escape my physical form
from my toes through my nose
the shaking and the wailing
it was worth it

I was exorcized
I was relieved
from the demons
infecting my brain
I was lightened
from the ******* burden
that pulled me down
hell was no longer a fear

I was beyond that
I was in limbo
with a demon in my head
a virus of no antidote
spoiling my insides

I was exorcized
I felt at ease
and yes
it was
when
I cried

Those spaces
between each line
form the places
where I lose
my
breath
writing about
you

I followed the lines
on my palm
and they never
seem
to make up
their mind
as time
passes
by

I heard Bukowski the other day
with his harsh drunken voice
echoing in my ears
strumming my heart
telling me to "go all the way"

A switch was clicked
My mind was intoxicated
I felt him near
pointing his boney finger
at my noise
"Go all the way"

As simple as it sounds
those 4 words shadow a journey
that'll forever scar itself on your heart
and engrave itself in your mind

My surroundings just got clearer
your glasses just sharpened all the ***** edges
that were parasiting their way in your mind
slowly eating you away, feeding on the only
life form out there,

"...and you'll do it, despite rejection
and the worst odds "
It's this knocking against your skull
this tapping that's getting louder and louder
"you'll do it"

This lustful feeling for whatever it is
that your body yearns for
that seductive pull
your lover does to drag you closer

"Do it, do it, do it
all the way"
he says

It burned
at the back of my throat
like a lump of cancer
killing every living cell of hope
I had for
myself

Can this be the cycle I feared
the one that bites you in the ***
after years of planning
and assessing?

Why have I found myself
rotting in this chair, scarring my eye sight
drying my creative juices
guideline by guideline?

It more than
just a
"Hello"
when my
my heart
speaks
through
my eyes