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Rusted iron bar
Rough against my wrist
Trapping all the moonlight
Under crystal waves

****** mason jars
Menial joyless tryst
Draining all the starlight
Through crystal waves

Far as you are far
Listless in your way
Searching in your headlights
Flooding in my head

Rustic open scar
The grit all washed away
Deep beneath the moonlight
In crystal waves

I just can't cant see
Without this interest
What's killing me

Causality
Couldn't careless
It's killing me

Whatever life spared to see
Couldn't care less
I don’t want to be asked if I’m ok.
I don’t want to be addressed when I’m upset.
Just leave me alone-
And hope to not let the world see how much
Of a freak
I really feel I am.
Sorry if it puts the
Circus out of business.
Her 5d
my friends and i
we go to scary farms
my friends and i
we go to haunted houses
my friends scream in terror
at the ghosts and ghouls

while i stand there
with no expression
they ask me why
i am not scared

how do i tell them
there is nothing scarier in this world

than losing your own m i n d
Kelsey 7d
We grew up together
Two peas in pod
You were my sidekick and I was yours
My one true platonic soulmate

So how did I let this happen?
How did I not know what was
Happening behind the four walls of your mind.
Behind the baggy sweaters that
Were suddenly "fashionable" all year round.

But if I think back carefully
Maybe I didn't miss it
Maybe I just ignored it

Ignored how when you got back from your
Summer in France the snug hoodie I gave you
Was no longer very snug
But rather hung like an ornament
On the thin frame of your body

Or how your legs began to resemble sticks
With a thigh gap most girls would die for.
Maybe I should have known the first time
You refused to eat your favourite ice cream
(chocolate mint chip) because calories!

When you told me you were in hospital
You said you were sick
But not in the way I thought you were
Because you didn't have chicken pox
Or pneumonia or bronchitis
You were sick in way that was much more twisted
You had a sickness of the mind
One that toyed with your thoughts
And messed with your sense
Until your body was wasting away.

I must admit at first I was angry
Because how could you keep this from me
I was your best friend and
You never told me your biggest secret
However then I was shocked
I could not understand
how you were in so much pain
And yet I did not know.
How had I cried for months
Proclaiming pain and suffering
That I believed no one could relate too
And yet here you were
Silently proclaiming the exact pain .
RisingUp Oct 11
I'm ashamed to admit
that from time to time
I miss the feeling of my bones.

I miss feeling thin
Feeling empty within
Feeling powerful and in control

Yet this is an illusion.

Depressed and fat, or depressed and thin?
Which mindset will eventually win?

I hope to find a middle ground.
Where self battering isn't a recurring sound.

Can that be found?
Grace Oct 5
OCD
Overwhelming thoughts
Control my
Depression

Overthinking
Creates Anxiety that
Defines my day

Obsessive ideas results in losing
Control and impulsively making
Decisions I will probably regret

OCD is not
A tidy room
And an immaculate locker
But an obsession that
Control your actions

OCD is not
Organizing markers
And ABC order records
But the cause of the
Tattoo on my leg
And scars on my thighs
julianna Oct 4
And it was
iN that split  
secOnd that i was
Rather weak.
Eating no longer  
seemed an eXit, but instead
as If it was so, so,
Aimless to do.
mars Oct 3
I don't

2. Think I will

3. Ever stop

4. Counting

5. But I can

6. Learn to live

7. Around the numbers
unwavering love;
your wavering voice
c a u g h t
in the eye of my storm

                                 (oh how I hope my torrents don't sweep you away)
Lights out,
Sleep child,
sleep.

You're only dreaming.

     There are no monsters under the bed.

~

They are in my head.
Unimaginary,
wreaking havok.

Pillage my heart

~

Sleep away your pains,
  or never wake up.

You've been asleep all along.
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