Life has a way of giving you exactly what you need to grow. Blessings in disguise. Sometimes you need to completely breakdown to build yourself up again. Sometimes you need to waste your time to realize how precious time is. Sometimes you have to be cold so you can warm up again. Life is a balance of highs and lows. It comes and goes.

Written on 3/28/17
Yanamari 4d

I stare into the clouded night sky
That shines the light of the sun on the clouds
Via the moon that orbits the Earth
Continuously
Round and round
Held in by
Just the right amount
Of gravity.
Nothing more,
Nothing less.

I am the moon
That moves on continuously
Seeking something more
But spending time frivolously.
Not moving forward
Or backward
But
Riding a course almost effortlessly
Weighing the balance of my course
On the moment and not
Resisting the force of the Earth.

I am the Earth
Attracting nothing useful to myself
Losing my health exponentially
My skin scars grow deeper
With the pollution of the bacteria
Ever multiplying
Not even their deaths diminishing
The pain of my barrier being torn
By my internal conflict
And I...
Just float.
Orbiting a greater body than I.

I am the sun
Feeling not the heat that is embedded
Within me
I question
If I can really feel anymore
Even though my skin is warm
My core still fusing,
Beating,
Emotions clashing within me
So much so that my body
Distances its core
From the surface
And I forget to worry
If...
I expand so far
And then collapse
Into myself
And become a void
Sucking in emotions
Numbly
Because I lost what was left of me.

I am the universe
Full of mystery
Full of dark shades
And galaxies plenty
Many planets,
Stars and satellites
That whirl and whirl
Into sight
Or disappear in a black hole.
I am the universe
That continues to expand
Stretching
Straining
Out of hand
Continuing on
Because I can
And this universe
This body is not mine
I cannot end it
At least,
It has not expended enough
To implode
Nor do I want it to
By the will that subconsciously
Remains within me.

ju Oct 2011

Handbag~ 1994
exam timetable
£5 from my Mum
shiny key for the front door
fresh-mint chewing gum

Handbag~ 1998
keys for work
keys for home
£20 and a bit of change
photo of my best mate
and a bloke that's twice my age
lipstick~ lacy knickers
condoms~ ID card
ticket for a bus to town
UV sparkly stars

Handbag~ 1999
keys for work
keys for home
spare key for his flat
condoms~ contraceptive pills
No.7 powder-ivory/matt
VISA/Delta debit card
paper
gel ink pens
number of a bloke
who says our love
will never end

Handbag~ 2000
keys for work
keys for home
key for the gas meter
teletubbies picture book
list of baby-sitters
new mobile phone
herbal teething gel
lipstick~ Annadin
vanilla impulse body spray
children's Neurofen
photo of my baby boy
really tiny socks
under-eye concealer
secret stash of chocs

Handbag~ 2002
keys for work
keys for home
pull back and go car
baby wipes
mobile phone
estate agents' cards
picture of my little boy
list of things to do
Boots own brand pregnancy test
both windows coloured blue

Handbag~ 2005
keys for home
card from work
tissue full of tears
photo of my boy in school
that shows his gappy teeth
photo of my baby girl
and one of both of them
a ring that used to be my Mum's
Pro-Plus~ Diazepam

Handbag~ 2009
keys for work
keys for home
one SLIM~FAST bar
one Cadbury's wrapper
Haribo~ Calpol~ tissues
assorted Disney plasters
treasured stones~ special shells
sand and bits of twig
money to buy ice creams
photos of my kids

when I was a child I thought I was beauty
when I was an adult I thought I was the beast
now that I am old I realise I am both
in perfect balance
and its okay

Tashea Young Mar 31

2 melanized hueman beings mesmerized by the beauty of their interior extending to the exterior shells
falling under one another's enchanting spells
Time was frozen the room grew still but the eyes spoke their own language in silent yearnings of screams and yells
becoming each others eye witness
Treasuring  each other temple of sacredness
Exploring their magical majestic nakedness
Both unapologetically shameless
Igniting a fire, So passionate yet flameless.
Infecting each other with love as if it was an air borne illness, quite contagious.
Feeling the wondrous Joys of  unfiltered bliss
Picture This ...
The natural beauty the 2 shades of Brown pigmented bodies shimmering as nuggets of Gold.
2 magnificent souls are as a flower in the spring ready to unfold.
The energy flowed,
True feelings get exposed
And they both glowed.
In the darkness of unlit room was the bride and Groom, Taking turns radiating similar to the sun and and the moon.
All 3 eyes are open wide.
As both of their worlds collide.
they drink of each others water fountain flowing from inside
their fleshy beings have died
their hearts cried
their minds wonder
The Temperature was hotter than the summer
She began to stutter words she can hardly utter
while he was captivated by this wombman he called "Earth mother "
  Telling her he loved her and he would place no one else above her.
  As the sound of their pulses and hearts were beating like a drummer.
Its was something more than sex that both had to discover
From the moment her touched her,
Revealed was their true colors.
She become him and he became her,
Reflections of one another.
Going pass what Was Happening under that black silk cover.
their spirits elevated high, ascending into the sky,
she bites her lip as he kisses her thick inner thighs,
She is intoxicated from his testosterone and from the sweet smell of her pheromones he gets high.
They close their eyes for a brief moment as their minds escape and their spirits tell this earthly world Goodbye.
He taste the delicious juices overflowing from her yonnie As she screams out, "Oh Papi".
Needing him so badly.
Falling in love with every bit of him, Madly.
He takes his Royal Phallus and places it gently inside of her Royal palace.
Reaching Heaven Bliss with Every single thrust and every single sensual kiss. Their hearts are pounding like the sound of the fist banging against the wall so loudly.
He was climbing her mountain till she reached a peak at her valley.
Both have become vulnerable and open.
Then she pleasures him until she starts chokin, Chokin on the words left unspoken.
Understanding the words they don't speak because the connection between them is unique.
As the slows jams are on repeat, she sits on his face like a seat until she gets tingles all over her body and feel weak so then he flips her over and dives in to her sacred waters so deep.
Praying that this is a treasure he hopes to keep. Placing her legs around him while making the bed squeak
moving to the rhythm of the beat unleashing the soft moans of her inner freak.
Grasping  a handful of  bodacious, firm, and soft butt cheek.
The juices again began to seep.
Reaching high levels of intimacy so deep.
Time has stop and their souls sprung a leak. Finding out the truth about one another that they have found the love in which they both seek.
Such a sweet treat!
He has swept her off her feet and She had him feeling like she was that missing piece to the puzzle making him feel whole again as if he was once broken but now complete.

Alyce Black Mar 20

Blue
Bright
Fading
This is how I like
my bruised skin
humming
And how I like my sin
buzzing

Pretty lights
are
zing-zing-zingzinging
across heavy flesh
ripe and warm
and wet
with the waters of
heaven

Sometimes I wonder if hell
is just a
fever dreamt
spell
from the disorderly mind
of someone with issues
like mine

Sienna Luna Mar 18

It's like my heart can't contain you.

It's like I've let go of what was needed to let go of

to let you in.

And it's beyond my expectations
like slipping my feet into the beach

and finding my toes
underneath soft, warm sand
warmed by the sun.

And for so long I've denied myself
happiness.

And for so long I've forced this picture that what I want

is better than what I truly need.

And I'm trying to understand why I had to give up one failed romantic relationship

in order to find another that is a hundred times better.

I realized that I had fallen

in love with my own poetry

I'd fallen in love with myself again and again and again

never truly allowing myself to fall
in love with anyone in reality
because my fantasies were so much better.

And then I met you

the beach, the sand, the cold lip of water lapping against my ankles
the submersion of water, salt, seaweed, and foam

your warm hand in my own
fingers latching

the beautiful sunrise
softly, strongly touching
a horizon stretching so many miles away but in one swift look

I saw balance. I saw joy. I saw the colors I've always loved and hoped to see one day.

It's like my heart can't contain you.

And the ocean is calling me home.

That giant expanse of glistening water reflecting the sun's willful welcome as a new day begins

so daunting so beautiful so overwhelming in its stark grandness

so familiar this feeling.

It's like I've known you for a very long time.

It's like I've found myself smiling with the waves now pressing against my gut

white sea foam dissolving quickly
tickling my torso
making me laugh
loud belly laughs
mouth stretched wide and daring
teeth showing
eyes crinkling
body shaking
legs trembling

The ocean of your love

is calling me home.

Am I ready to dive deeper?
Am I ready to submerge not just my torso but my head as well?
What if I can't breathe underwater?
What if I can't open my eyelids?

It's like my heart can't contain you.

But then I touch my neck

and find gills.

But then I touch my eyes

and find goggles.

And then I know

that I'm ready to dive.

Kendra Mack Mar 13

Violet – I am lavender,
Soft and sure.
Calm laughter.
Focused dedication.
10 minutes meditation.
Violet – I am silence.
Balance.
No violence.
Violet is nothing wrong.
Like the sunset,
it can’t last long.

A stanza of a larger poem I'm working on for the equinox.
ylruceiram Feb 28

The darkness yearns for the light yet the light craves for the darkness.

Because that's just how life is.
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