I sought joy by holding on to pain Sought freedom by holding on to a chain Trying to keep track of the time, my lifetime but I'm too scared to watch I'll see how it passes fast and my dreams I can no longer touch Tell me you do see the watch on my wrist Does it show you what wasted, am I at risk? I'm looking for fame yet I cover my face I guess my shame brought me to this place
I should warn you about me... I am a oddity of sorts. I am deathly quiet, except upon occasions that I am loud. I am dumb, unless I choose to be witty, and I am the most single romantic. I wrap my anger in peace, and store it alongside envy and hope. I hate myself, but no one can ever love me more. I am hideously beautiful, and I hate to love, but love to hate. I am a conflicted contradiction, and we will fall in love until I realize that I am afraid of heights, and so I will walk away as I crawl back to you. Forgive me, my love, for being this way. Just as I accept things for the way they are, I can't seem to stay the same. So I change.
So, I’m drawn to your religion On the basis of aesthetic. I want to feel the way that Golden, plump, laughing Buddha Feels without having to read the stories. I want to embrace the wu wei-- Whatever that means-- I want to sit criss-crossed In the long, naples yellow grass With no ticks. In the orange afternoon sun With no nighttime. I want to worship at a smoky altar And feel the arms of My Goddess wrap around me. Hear her voice: slow, smooth, but stern. “Thank you,” for the sacrifice. I want to be divine--God Gaze down from the Heavens And take pride in my light Like I am your son; I want to be free of the burden Of my humanness, Lifted, Cleansed, Purified. I wish to be free of desire And so it is the desire which ails me. And I curse nothing more Than I curse my hungry heart And my faulty mind. Lifted, Cleansed, Purified.
Your beautiful. Everywhere I look is paradise. I thought of moving there. Closer to you. For sure, sometime next year. Today, tomorrow. Sometimes I miss it. This glorious overhead view. A bucket list dream come true. A place that takes my breath in slow pace. I wanna go so bad. This place of senrenity. This place of peace. Everywhere I look is paradise. I've been told Tuesdays aren't bad times to fly. Head in the clouds. The sunset of your eyes. Discovering a love like yours. Paradise in the blink of an eye. For sure sometime next year. Today, tomorrow