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Mar 2020 · 106
Color
XPY Mar 2020
If someone asked me
how I would describe
color,
I would tell them this:

Yellow
is stepping outside in spring.
It is the welcoming
embrace of sun.

Green
is lying in a field of grass.
It is the rustle of leaves
in the summer breeze.

Blue
is standing in the light rain,
and the sweet birdsong
when the sky opens up.

Red
is the feeling when your hands brush;
her lips on yours, breathing the same air.
It is the fire in two hearts that beat together.
© X. P. Y. 2020
XPY Jan 2020
I want to take
the fast train with you
and go far away from here.
~
Wǒ xiǎng gēn nǐ
zuò kuàichē
qù lí zhè'er yuǎn
© XPY 2020
I'm trying something new but it won't let me post the Chinese characters :(
Jan 2020 · 183
Touch-Starved
XPY Jan 2020
I feel the feather-light touches
Of imaginary fingers
As they creep across my shoulders.
Longingly,
I pretend that the pressure
Across my chest is the security
Of your arms holding me.
But really, it is the constricting
Bind of loneliness
Gripping me tightly.
© X. P. Y. 2020
Dec 2019 · 1.0k
Storm
XPY Dec 2019
I clung to you like a lifeline-
A floating buoy in a violent sea
But when I let go of you
Into the deep, deep
Blue,
I found that I had gills—
And I could breathe.
XPY 12-8-19
Dec 2019 · 932
Clouds
XPY Dec 2019
Briefly,
We were magical;
Like shooting stars
Caught between clouds.
XPY 12-7-19
Nov 2019 · 259
Pompeii
XPY Nov 2019
We built our house
at the base of Vesuvius;
in the shadow of that mountain
we made our home.

When the tremors came
we shook it off and carried on:
it was just the island settling.

When fire rained down,
and smoke and ash filled the sky
we did nothing but watch,
as the air darkened.

We knew- in the back of our minds-
that the end was coming, and yet
we did nothing because what was there to do?

They will come in a hundred years
and see the green grass and
the beautiful, vibrant blossoms
and know nothing of the fire that destroyed us.
© XPY 2019
Sep 2019 · 547
Summer Storm
XPY Sep 2019
The rain descends
like a velvet curtain.

I use that steady
pounding, thrumming
downpour

to cleanse my skin
of your touch.

It fills me up, and I spit you out;
wring you out of my hair.

Thunder crashes
lightning flashes
and I
Let
you
go.
© XPY 2019
Sep 2019 · 417
Left Behind
XPY Sep 2019
You go out late
at night, and i stay here,
picking up the pieces
of the mess you left behind.

(i am the mess you left behind
and i spend the night
picking up the broken
pieces of myself
.)
9-10-19
© XPY 2019
Jun 2019 · 292
Pining
XPY Jun 2019
**** it,
I'm strong,
independent,
and I'm my own
******* person

But ****,
I'm lonely.

I want
a hug? maybe?
the touch of
someone who cares
the comfort of affection

I crave
that warmth.
© KMH 2019
~ i'm lonely ******* ~
Jun 2019 · 622
Imagine
XPY Jun 2019
A cooling breeze
trickling in through the window
on a humid night

the lights outside
muffled by the drizzling rain,
the rustling trees

the comfortable warmth
of my bed, this blanket,
and your arms around me.
© KMH 2019
~ Everything was real except for the last line and I think that might be the saddest part ~
Jun 2019 · 267
Affection
XPY Jun 2019
To crave affection
Is to crave-
To long for-
The display of love
And care.

To want affection,
One must first want
To be loved
And then want
To be shown that love.

To crave affection
Is to long for the knowledge
that one is loved and as much as
I shame myself for that craving
I can find no fault in it.
©️K. M. H.
~ I have recently found myself craving affection. I meant for this to be shorter than it is but I kind of like it.
May 2019 · 452
Perspective
XPY May 2019
You are the center
of your own world.
You look forward and you
turn around and you
are still looking forward.

(Even if someone tells you
you’re facing backward,
to you it is still forward.)

You are your own
pivot point- the axis-
The pin in the paper.
When you stand
you stand still.

(Everything else around you
Will change and
Sometimes you change too
But you’re still you.)
© KMH 2019
You're not the center of everyone's universe but sometimes it's okay to be the center of your own universe. (Take some self-care time sometimes, love yourself all the time (or as often as you can).)
May 2019 · 913
Sometimes, Always, Never
XPY May 2019
Sometimes,
When you call out my name
And you smile and wave,
I smile because, well,
Why wouldn’t I smile?

But sometimes,
Hours later when I lie
Awake in bed and smile
To myself, I learn to hate
That smile.

Because you always,
always smile at me,
and never for me.
Never in the way
you smile for her.
© KMH 2019
Sometimes I hate my heart.
XPY May 2019
My soul grows restless
though I grow weary
I wish for a peaceful adventure
to cure this aching want.
© KMH 2019
part four of my "TMHTM" series (I'm pretty much done typing out the whole title now.)
XPY May 2019
Before,
This was a home.
Now,
It is poison.

I want to breathe but
The air is toxic and
Your words- they are harsh-
Cut deep
and they hurt.

I want to sleep but
The monsters keep me awake.
They haunt
Only me.

I want to rest my
Weary, aching feet but
The chair, the sofa, the bed-
This house
is made
of Fire.

Before,
This was a home.
Now,
It is only poison
.
Before, this place was a home. Now, it is only poison and fire and pain and I just want to rest.

© KMH 2019
XPY May 2019
All I want from life
is that when I smile
someone always smiles back
© KMH 2019
Another of my short poems from my "Things My Heart Tells Me" series
Apr 2019 · 218
Anxious
XPY Apr 2019
My heart pounds.
My lungs stutter,
chest tightens, hands shake.

Words echo
harsh and
loud like two drums off-beat.

I don't want
to listen
but they don't want to stop.
© KMH 2019
Today was not a good day.
XPY Apr 2019
I want to go
where the sun is clear
and the air is fresh-
somewhere I can be at peace
© KMH 2019
this is the second of my "Things My Heart Tells Me" series; a bunch of single verse poems that are unnamed
XPY Mar 2019
If I could leave my soul behind
I would leave it here-
Where it could dream forever.
© KMH 2019
~ I'm starting a new series of single-verse poems. none of them are titled because they aren't thoughts so much as things my heart tells me.
Feb 2019 · 580
Aching
XPY Feb 2019
My bones ache
Like crumbling stone cliffs
Constantly battered
By a sea of exhaustion.
© KMH 2019
~
im tired.
Nov 2018 · 1.9k
Would You Rather
XPY Nov 2018
The bite of the cold
(Outside)
Is nothing compared to this
(your) Suffocating warmth
(I can’t stand it)
© KMH
Remove the words in parentheses for an angst-filled haiku
Oct 2018 · 313
A Sad Revelation
XPY Oct 2018
Oh.
You... and her.
Oh.
Well...
I'll just
smile and laugh

and keep your
smile
in the back of my
mind.

I'll just
push those
thoughts
away.
Crush part II
© KMH
*Le Sigh*
Sep 2018 · 1000
Crush
XPY Sep 2018
I wish I could
draw that smile
from your lips

I want to make you
laugh... and-
Oh, i dunno.

I want to hold
your hand
in mine.
© KMH
*sigh*
Sep 2018 · 235
A Little Bit
XPY Sep 2018
I’m not religious

But sometimes i
see an angel in
the eyes of the little girl down the street.

I’m not religious but
Sometimes I find a bit of faith
In the kindness of others

I’m not religious
But sometimes i pray
To whoever is out there
To help me make it through the day

I’m not religious but sometimes
We all need a little bit of hope
And heaven.
© KMH
Sep 2018 · 1.5k
Warmth
XPY Sep 2018
Sometimes i just want
To curl up on
A cold, rainy day
And sink into
The arms of someone
Who loves me.
© KMH
~ Lately, I've often been struck by the urge to cuddle with someone, but am stuck with no one to cuddle with.
May 2018 · 4.9k
Friendly Neighborhood Hero
XPY May 2018
~
Heroes
They call you,
Heroes.

There's just something-
Something about that
Word.
~
I’ve got this special
Kind of magic,
And wouldn’t it be
Just awesome,
If I could be one-
A Hero-
Too?
~
I did my best.
And I defied you.
Disobeyed you.
I’m sorry
(but it was worth it).
I’m sorry.
~
I don’t want to leave.
I’m not ready to go
I don’t want to go.
Please.
Hold on.
Hold on for me.
Please don’t let me go.
~
I’m sorry.
I’m so sorry.
Heartbroken ~ Avengers Infinity War
XPY May 2018
I tried.
I promise you, I tried.
I loved you and
You told me you loved me
And I knew you did.
And because I loved you
I let you go
And I knew
You were at peace.
At least for a little bit.
You were safe.
And I was hurting
And I wanted to scream.
I wanted to set the world on fire.
But you were not in pain,
And that was all I could ever ask for.

But then he came

And he brought you back.

And it hurt you.
You were in so much pain.
I could see it in your eyes.
Feel it in my soul.
And then you were gone.
Again.
But it was not a peaceful end.
And you were gone.
Gone for good.
And he won.
The monster we made with our loss.

And then I felt myself go.
And it was okay
Because I was with you-
My Love.
You were there,
And he was there,
Waiting for me-
          I could see him.
The other half of me.
And I was gone.
And my family
          My family.
They were hurting,
But I was at peace.

I hope they knew.
I'm still crying ~ Based on Avengers: Infinity War
Apr 2018 · 457
Still, She Sleeps
XPY Apr 2018
She sleeps
In the bright meadow
Under the sunny oaks,
maples, pines.

The darkness closes in.
Still,
She sleeps
And the guardian watches on.
Inspired by “The Woodman’s Child” by Arthur Hughes, 1860
© K. M. H.
Apr 2018 · 728
Predators
XPY Apr 2018
in that dark room
Of shadowed histories

the Snake smiles,
and raises a glass-
the Blood on his hands
dripping onto clean cloth.

the Sparrow watches on;
Caged in her own regret.
her face is a blank Mask.

the Fawn gazes across a
would-be bright future.
trees and grasses Glow
With promise and dreams.

THEY run the World.
the rest of -us- suffer through;
raised by Hope,
cut down by Snakes.
Inspired by “The Last Day in the Old Home” by Robert Braithwaite Martineau, 1862
© KMH 2018
Apr 2018 · 384
Grace on Feathered Wings
XPY Apr 2018
Time passes
in seconds,
minutes,
hours.

People pass by-
day
by day
by day.

She sits, statuesque,
in the glowing light
of Dusk
waiting for the end.

yet...

An angel comes
on wings of red and gold.
He carries with him
a saving Grace.
Inspired by the painting “Beata Beatrix” by Dante Gabriel Rossetti, c1864-1870
© KMH 2018
XPY Apr 2018
i sat there for the
longest time.

In the dark-
in that small,
small space and

fabric rustled around me
with every shift and every
movement and change.

I watched, through
the small crack of light,
the shadows
dance and the soles of
shoes pass.

I tried to make sense
of their movements
the sounds that come
out of their mouths.

Their interactions.

After the longest time I
decided to stand up
from the floor
of that small, dark space.

Quietly,
I put my hand on
the ****, and it turned.

I crept out
of that space.
Timid, unsure.

I don't think
anyone noticed.
I'm glad.

I'm still not quite...

there yet.
There is something to be said about coming out of closets, even if silently, by yourself.

© KMH 2018
Apr 2018 · 365
Soulmates?
XPY Apr 2018
What is
A soulmate?

is it someone who
knows
everything about you
without needing to be told?

Or is it someone who
completes you?

Are they supposed to be
your other half?

Do you need to be
completely
dependent
on each other?

Can a soulmate be
a friend?

Do you know exactly
who it is
the moment you meet them?

Do you only have one soulmate?
certainly there
(or somewhere).

What if you
aren't in
Love?
[See: *Soulmates.*]
© KMH 2018
Apr 2018 · 252
Grief
XPY Apr 2018
She stands,
A hand on his shoulder,
Under green-shadowed
Arches.

His tears flow freely-
Fallen petals on
Stone
Cold
Ground.

Indigo-ivory blossoms
Soak up
Despair.
Inspired by "April Love," a painting by Arthur Hughes, 1885.
© KMH 2018
Apr 2018 · 340
Lions and Lambs
XPY Apr 2018
You were like
that warm spring day in March.
You were my seventy degrees
the tulips poking through the ground
the first crocuses of the season.

You were the warm breeze
the shining sun.
You were my warmth
at the end of the winter.

but you were also a lie.

Because you became that snow
after snow
after snow
You were the less-than-thirty

The flowers froze
and crumbled.
The sun was still there
but it was a cold, harsh light.

You were kind and beautiful,
warm and bright,
but you were a lie.
You were my snowstorm in March.
"In like a lion out like a lamb," the saying goes, or "in like a lamb out like a lion." This March was both constant lions and lambs and now it's April.

*also I figured out formatting*
© KMH 2018
Apr 2018 · 388
The Only Way Left to Go
XPY Apr 2018
They say when you hit
Rock
Bottom,
The only way left to go
Is up.
But what happens
When I reach
the top
of the mountain?
What happens
when there is no way
to reach higher?
is that my Limit?
When you reach the bottom,
the only way left to go
is up.
When you reach the top
Can you go no further?

I think
I’m crashing down.
Based on the "gifted child burnout" troupe.
© KMH 2018
Apr 2018 · 6.4k
Brains or Beauty?
XPY Apr 2018
You can pretend
That the black gloss
On my lashes
Will glue my eyes shut-
Make me blind to truth;
To ‘true knowledge.’
Go ahead.
Tell yourself
That my red-painted lips
Only spout nonsense.
It will only make it sweeter
When my wing-lined eyes
Give you whiplash
as I walk past you
To get my degree;
My award;
My paycheck.
Maybe if you’re ‘nice’
I’ll buy you an ice pack.
feminist makeup
© KMH 2018
Apr 2018 · 18.3k
Magic
XPY Apr 2018
She had galaxies
In her eyes
And her tears
Were falling stars.
© XPY 2018
Apr 2018 · 309
What to Be
XPY Apr 2018
Be the ocean
Wild and free
Everchanging
And unrelenting

Be the storm
Calm at the center
A whirlwind
All around

Be the sun
Burning bright
Shining down
A source of Life

Be the night
Brilliant as the stars
But also the darkness
Helping them shine

Be the leaves
Flying away
At the whim of the breeze
Colors of the wind

Be brave
Be humble
Have courage
And Be kind

Be the changemaker
Be the change
You want
The world to be

Be whoever-
Whatever-
You want
To be
inspired by @michaelfdubois on Instagram
© KMH 2018
Apr 2018 · 252
Old Cities, New Souls
XPY Apr 2018
I was in the old sector of a city
one day
and I thought
of this boy
whom I might've
            liked
                to love
                      in another life.
I remember he told me
one day
he'd want to live
in the old part
of a big city.

I asked him why,
and in all honesty,
            I wouldn't be able to tell you his answer.
Walking through that neighborhood,
I think
I might've known why.

Modern cities
are full of culture
and people
and noise,
but the historic districts-
the original apartments
and bricks
and stones-
they have souls
and thousands
of memories.
Those buildings have witnessed
        history
in the making.
~ The explination behind "Old City, Old Soul" ~
© KMH 2018
Mar 2018 · 238
A 'Nice' Girl (pt. II)
XPY Mar 2018
I tell people that I'm not 'nice'
and they immediately assume
I'm telling them
I'm mean.

What I meant to say is-
I'm not soft
or fluffy
or flowery.

But I like to think
I'm good
and that I do
good things.

I'm honest
and I'll always tell you
what I think you need to hear
whether you want to
or not.

and I'll always be there
whether you're looking for me
or not,

but I won't whisper
fake, meaningless, sweet
nothings
into your ear.

I won't pretend I like
the way you
insult people's love
or appearance
or culture.

And I won't pretend
to be who I'm not.
Just to make you think
I'm a 'Nice' Girl.
This started as the caption of A 'Nice' Girl but I decided to write it like this.
© KMH 2018
Mar 2018 · 180
Testing Testing 1 2 3
XPY Mar 2018
bold?
/italics/?
"Normal"
bold* /italics/?
Someone
please
explain
I'm actually so confused how do people format on this site???
©KMH 2018
XPY Mar 2018
I’d like to think
That as a person,
I am good;
That I do good things.

But sometimes,
As I lie awake at night,
I count my blessings
And I count
My sins.
Sometimes I wish I knew what people think of me.
Mar 2018 · 300
A 'Nice' Girl
XPY Mar 2018
I’ll never be the ‘nice’ girl
Clean and pure like fallen snow,
But I will burn away the hate
And any demons you may know.

I promise that I’ll be here
When the darkness hurts your heart
I will glow, burn, and light the way
Because ‘pretty’ can’t match art.

I’ll burn with the rage of fire
But I won’t be your glowing moon,
I do not love nor give trust freely,
But it’s strongest when I do.

You might only see my shielded heart
And my ever-guarded soul,
But find the crack and then
I’ll be yours- eternal, broken, whole.

I’ll never be the nice girl
Because I’m ‘better’ than just nice-
Because my fire burns the brightest
And I’ll be willing to pay their price.
© KMH 2018
Mar 2018 · 245
Paint Me a Picture
XPY Mar 2018
Paint me a picture
Show me the world
Through Color and beauty
It never grows old.

Draw me as I am
Freeze me in time
Capture the moment
Leave the Past behind.

Sculpt and carve
Build up and chip away
Make something that will stay here
Stand Tall and never sway

Create something, anything
A picture or a memory
Remember forever
Keep it safe for me.
inspired by Sarah J. Maas's A Court of Thorns and Roses series
© KMH 2018
Mar 2018 · 148
"Us" and "Me"
XPY Mar 2018
Look into my broken eyes
And thus wholly truthful be:
Did you love “us” truly?
Or only the idea of “me”?
© KMH 2018
Mar 2018 · 992
Listen
XPY Mar 2018
L i s t e n   f o r   t h e   s o u n d   o f   a   b r o k e n   h e a r t ,

C a l l i n g   f o r   a   s i g n   o f   l o v e .

G a z e   i n t o   t h e   e y e s   o f   a   s h a t t e r e d   s o u l ,

S e e k i n g   h e l p   f r o m   u p   a b o v e
© KMH 2018
Mar 2018 · 596
"Cities Have Souls Too"
XPY Mar 2018
It might be in the way
The buildings seem
to smile at each other
Or the way
The street lamps flicker
Hello
As you walk by.

Maybe it talks
To the small town
just south of the border
By way of the people
who come
and go.

Perhaps the spirit
Of a city
Flows through the power lines;
The grids of fire and lightning.
Maybe the lights are akin to life.

Maybe the city's mind-
Its complex, high-functioning brain
Lies underground.
Its neurons are the subways
Moving the people like so many thoughts.

Maybe the soul of a city lies
Within the people who dwell there.
The new ones that add to it
The ones who are just
Swallowed whole

Into the abyss
Of lights and life and love.
The title is a quote from the book Jane, Unlimited by Krisitn Cashore, and is inspired by the aforementioned quote.
Mar 2018 · 181
We All Fall Down
XPY Mar 2018
If the world
started to burn,
she might have just
let it.
    -- if only out of spite.
© KMH 2018
Mar 2018 · 249
Ashes, Ashes
XPY Mar 2018
She would watch
the world
Burn in flame
And crumble
To naught but ash
Because then maybe, all
would finally
be
Equal.
© KMH 2018
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