bryn 12h

how does it feel
to spring up
to stop old habits
and gain new
you go through 'phases'
that end up being more than just
phases.

how does it feel
to spring up
to start new things
and give up
you go through 'friends'
who end up being less than
friends.

how does it feel
to spring up
to realize life
doesn't always go your way
you go through looks
that end up being you hating yourself
even more than before

how does it feel
to spring up
and die
and be happy
with this version
of yourself

i m   s o r r y

Hey girl,
I know you are hurting,
But you will forget everything,trust me.

When you step into the mandap,
You will forget the boys that stepped on your heart.

As he slides the ring on to your finger,
You will forget all the slashes on your wrists.

The burning flames won't remind you of all the photos you burnt,
It will stand for love, for marriage.

As you go to work, to that beautiful restaurant you own,
You will forget those who said,
"Good she can cook, she has at least one quality of a housewife".

Your books, published everywhere,
Will once and for all,
Diminish those voices,
Asking you what your 'real'  profession is.

As you have pillow fights with your kids,
You will forget your tear stained pillows.

It won't matter that the coffee brown eyed boy didn't love you back,
That everyone who hugged you made you flinch,
And that you couldn't protest,
You couldn't raise your voice.

The accusations, the name calling,
Slut, bitch, cheat,
It won't matter,
Nor will the license test that you failed,
Or the presentation where you fainted.

My dear girl,
You will turn into a butterfly,
The caterpillar that you were,
Won't matter.

Danika 1d

Springsteen sang about glory days
and I laughed
and swore that wouldn’t be me.
I looked around this small town
at these large fishes
and knew I’d find a bigger pond.

But here I am
holding up jerseys
reading newspaper clippings
looking at old pictures
corsages
valentine’s roses
yearbook autographs
picture day poses

and can’t stop talking about
glory days.

4/26/17
BE McComb 4d

some children were raised
feet dug down into sand
dreams washing back and
forth with the saltwater waves

others were raised
with their hands dusty
nails and hearts stained
from red dirt and poverty

but i was raised
with a translucent blue
heart and clean hands
the bottoms of my
feet black from plum wood
that touched the sky
and gray concrete that
sunk below the earth

(for some summer meant
freedom
for me it meant
dried grass

for some fall meant
leaf piles
for me it meant
the wind and rain)


in winter i was raised
under white lights
and strings of garland

in spring i was raised
under blood red cloths
of death and resurrection

life cycled on
around and around
while i grew
up and up

(the hardest part
of letting go is
the wondering why
you even bothered
the wondering why
you wasted your time

the hardest part
of growing up is
the learning that no
matter what broke
you nothing is wasted
that shapes you inside)


in the meantime
i was raised
and raised
but a child can
only be raised so far
before they fall

people change but seasons don't
Copyright 4/24/17 by B. E. McComb
Ethan Polson Apr 18

Wake up my tender child,
So sweet, caring and mild,
It's time to walk free,
To the stormy, twisting Sea,
But before you swim away from me,
Enjoy the run, you hear me?
Wake up my precious child,
Slow down your running wild,
You may think swimming in the Sea is fun,
But soon you'll be asking for one more run,
Wake up my dearest child,
Your swimming too rough and riled
Your arms and legs are weary and worn
The Sea is drowning you and you're too torn
Wake up my drowning child
Remember when you smiled?
Fight the this Sea with that grin,
And I promise you you'll win

Lunar Love Apr 18

Seven years. It has been seven years since that day.

And now here they were in the alfresco of that overrated café, with the man sitting across the lady: he was sipping his black coffee and she, her jasmine tea. The scenario almost seemed impossible in the past, but for someone with her tenacious personality, something ‘impossible’ just meant ‘a little later’ than ‘never at all.’ This moment played by fate was comparable to the persistent rainstorm that forced them to stay together a little longer in the coffee shop than planned.

“I’ve been thinking,” he sighed into his coffee mug, “About leaving this place and heading to the States. Study more on film and acting from the professionals themselves. Get into showbiz of the global standard. Be a real director. What do you think?”

She straightened her posture and settled her cup down on the table, nodding in acquiescence at his idea of endeavors that appeared promising for his future.

“Well… Why not? I say go for it. I support you in that decision.”
He diverted his eyes to hers, trying to read the gaze behind those wide eyes. Though wide and nonchalant they may seem to be, only a few can notice and genuinely understand what swims in those dark depths. Their staring game ended as her voice surfaced once again through the sound of rainfall.

“I support you. If you’re ever wondering why, it’s because I had to make a decision just like that—seven years ago.”

This time it was his eyes that widened, and he placed his mug alongside hers.

“What kind of decision was it? You definitely weren’t aiming to be an actor like me, considering you’re a licensed interior designer, not to mention writer, right now,” he chuckled, leaning back onto his chair.

A soft smile of nostalgia emerged on her lips as she remembered what she wrote on the night of the sixteenth, a day before the significant seventeenth.

April 16, 2017; 11:15 P.M. — I’m satisfied of this unrequited love. I’m happy this is all one-sided. I’m glad everything is ending before it can even truly begin. It would be easier for me to leave him who doesn’t even have the slightest knowledge of my existence, who doesn’t even know my sentiments, who doesn’t even miss me, yet alone think of me. It’s all good; perfect, even. A broken heart is better than two. At least there will be some times when I might let him and his strong hands put my weak heart back together and restore it to me. I’d rather have that than us both losing and scattering the pieces of our mutually shattered hearts. He must never be broken; I need to protect him from being so—I will take myself away from him. I’ve never been any happier to be in a love that’s unknown and unreturned. He will be happy, and I will be too. In the end, his happiness will always be mine.

“I had to leave the places and people I love, to be where I am and who I am today,” she exhaled. “It was tough, but thinking of those moments and people I held onto and appreciated… all of that kept me going.”

“Was it a happy one? I mean, did you find the happiness or ending you were looking for?”

“If I were to be dead honest, yes. More than happy, actually. I’m not just relieved, or satisfied; I’m overwhelmingly grateful. I earned the careers and lifestyle I aimed for. I managed to travel all over the world and see the places and people I’ve wanted to see. My soul roams free, finding home in the many corners of this earth. I’ve finally come home, and this time I know I’m not alone.”

The man was a grown man in a smart-casual attire, but he sure maintained the curious eyes of the child that he furtively kept in himself. Being under his scrutinizing eyes, she reminisced of the same intensity he gave back when they were still twenty-one and on the verge of growing up.

“But what about ‘him’ whom you left behind? Did you come to know him this time, maybe love him too, again?”

She picked up her teacup, providing a little wall between them both, and swallowed the remaining aromatic drops along with the thoughts she wanted to tell him ever since then. I came to know him—you—but I don’t love him ‘again’. The feelings, which I harbored for you for all these years, never left me even when I left you back then. I know I was told to reach for the moon that I may land among the stars even if I failed to reach it. But I realized I had to reach beyond the moon—the sun, the Milky Way, the entire universe—because I wanted and needed to be worthy of my existence. I wanted and needed to prove myself to myself, to you and to everyone else.

“I did. And I’m happy with how we are right now, even if it seems like we’re back to zero this time round.  Though I’m not sure how my feelings are for him now, if I seek him as a friend or as a potential love interest.”

He seemed doubtful of her response hence did he hesitantly express his last thoughts: “So you’re happy now because you left him previously. But what if he’s the one who leaves this time? Would you still be happy?”

The clouds were emptying now as the pouring rain concluded to a light shower; likewise the people they were surrounded with under the alfresco umbrellas. She knew that she was prepared to answer this question. For the past years, concerned individuals would ask her the very same thing, and for this was she thankful. She herself would recite the words to her reflection every day, much like a prayerful mantra.

He caught a faint twinkle in her eye, a proof of which her answer would be echoing with conviction and it made him realize that those particular words to be said would be one of those things that would remind him of her.

“It won’t matter if he learns how I feel then or not, and yet doesn’t feel the same way. If leaving me would direct him to his happiness, then so be it. Perhaps we aren’t meant to love each other in this lifetime, any other lifetime, or even in parallel worlds, but I still am and would be happy about it. What’s greater than this feeling of being able to love someone so much? Like I said: in the end, his happiness will always be mine.”

There's an angel called wjh I've let into my life, and I have to let him go now.
Journey of Days Apr 13

these times are precious
you cannot see it now
but you will come to appreciate the time
the just being here
with us
just hanging out
no pressure, judgement, or expectations

these times are essential
so you can be yourself
with those who love you
and accept who you are
even when you look like that and smell...well...interesting

these times will sustain you
when you are far away
doing your thing and living a life
building your own traditions
that these times prepared you for

@journeyofdays

when your kids are getting older and thinking they are too cool for family holidays together
Danika Apr 12
IF

sitting on an If
is all we do these days
sitting on a Maybe
on an I have no idea
It will work out
We’ll just have to wait and see
Limbo
In between
From when our plan was swept away
scattered in bad timing

So this is real life
What Dad always mentioned in his prayers
about the unnamed families sitting in church pews
hands folded, heads bowed, eyes open
of finding a home and finding a job
of finding a paycheck finding a future
he was right
it’s easier said than done
to believe there is a plan

10/30/16
Camps Apr 8

As I've grown up,
I've realized that I have a gap in between my two front teeth -
and it's starting to widen.

The first of my "On Growing Up" series, which highlights the (very) personal things that I learn about myself as I continue to grow up. You can find "On Growing Up" in its entirety in my collections.
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