Oh the guilt I felt, I don't think you understand how it t o r e me apart, left me s ha k in g, sobbing, begging for something to help you. Because I couldn't. And I will never, never forgive myself.
Why am I always so depressed? Why can't it stop? Tears well up in my eyes Words stuck in my throat. I try to get help but I can't move Feet stuck to the floor And hands Jittering quickly Make this stop Make this stop Make this stop
I had a dream, that you crashed and burned I ran to you, my body shaking, 𝑓𝑒𝑎𝑟. It was not a dream. How can I fit the whole of you in my arms again Your body so alive and breathing, real in a way I don't know what to do with I am not strong enough to stop your fire I wish I could, for a while step back, no fear. Breathe you in and hold you close and say "You are loved because these hands touch you, these arms hold you, this skin knows you and this heart longs for you." They are all mine, and yours too, the crash, the burns, all fire. I'll make it stop if you allow me to.
All those those things I thought were true Seems like I didn't even had a clue. Even though I was used to the pain Cause it was the only thing made me feel alive! Now it seems to not matter It was all useless!
Waking up everyday with the same burden Caught in the web I, myself had woven What it really seems Is that nothing really matters!
My head starts spinning My body's shaking Thinking about what could've done! My feet starts walking My hands are reaching Desire for my world to burn!
And still I am here Just waiting for you... Drowning in the pool of agony With disbelief in Separation!!!
By playing hatred for attention the ones who need it are ignored. Drip Drip Drip Shaking, fidgeting tape around cotton ***** red seeping through my shirt sleeve They're going to see what I did What I've become What I always was inside. It's no one's fault but my own . . . But they don't give a ****.