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Feb 27 · 196
The Musical Theorist
MetaVerse Feb 27
He wouldn't compose a cantata,
A symphony, song, or sonata:
     The best of his best
     Is a piece that's one rest,
Played f and with a fermata.
Feb 27 · 596
The Unrise
MetaVerse Feb 27
There once was a man from Bombay
Who enjoyed a remarkable day:
     It started at sunrise
     When the sun chose to unrise,
And it ended when Earth rolled away.
Feb 27 · 564
Lazy Eye
MetaVerse Feb 27
There once was a man from Mumbai
Whose face had the laziest eye:
     It opened at noon
     While the other as soon
As the sun rose was focused and spry.
Feb 27 · 345
Nora
MetaVerse Feb 27
There once was a woman from Norway
Who'd hang by her toes in the doorway:
     She went to her dude
     And his friends in the ****
And requested a fjordian fjour-way.
Compare limericks by Lear and Swinburne about the woman of Norway.
Feb 26 · 203
Learian Limericks
MetaVerse Feb 26
There was an Old Person of Crete,
Who walked on the ***** of his feet;
When they asked why it was, he responded, "Because,"
That taciturn Person of Crete.

There was an Old Person of Finland,
Whose cabin was upland and inland;
He lived in a region where fish spoke Norwegian,
That flapperous Person of Finland.

There was an Old Man of Geneva,
Who had an encounter with Shiva;
They patty-cake played in a hornet-loud glade,
Shiva and the Man of Geneva.

There was a Young Lady of Paris,
Whom ****** couldn't embarrass;
She wandered the city with ***** and *****
Exposed to the city of Paris.

There was an Old Husband of Arles,
Whose wife had a passion for quarrels;
All day and all night she'd invite him to fight,
That exhausted Old Husband of Arles.

There was an Old Man of Kyoto,
Who mastered supremely the koto;
His tea was the greenest, his dragon the meanest,
His koto the best in Kyoto.

There was an Old Man of Algiers,
Who listened with elephant ears
To streams and to trees and to birds and to bees
That delighted the Man of Algiers.

There was a Young Lady of Arles,
Who married a ****** named Charles;
When they asked, "Does it fit?" she replied, "Not a bit!"
That unsatisfied Lady of Arles.

There was an Old Man with a beard,
Whose ****** expressions were weird;
He'd grimace when glad and he'd twinkle when sad,
That curious Old Man with a beard.

There was an Old Man
Of Japan,
Whose limericks would never
Ever
Scan, that instupendious Old Man of Japan.
Feb 26 · 303
The Guru of Ind
MetaVerse Feb 26
There once was a guru of Ind
Who fasted and rapidly thinned:
     They offered him Gogurt:
     He said, "That's not yogurt!"
And broke—in disgustedness—wind.
Feb 22 · 509
Four:twenny
MetaVerse Feb 22
There once was a man from Kilkenny
Who purchased a pipe for a penny,
     Then filled it with wacky
     And woolly tobacky,
And smoked himself dumb at four:twenny.
Feb 22 · 1.4k
Knickerspoo
MetaVerse Feb 22
There once was a man with a flu
Who ran in the night to the loo:
     He stubbed all his toes
     In consecutive rows
While filling his knickers with poo.
Jan 26 · 380
Flying in Falling
MetaVerse Jan 26

Flying in falling
Softly snow, five blue pigeons
And a white pigeon.  


Dec 2024 · 916
Kiss of Death
MetaVerse Dec 2024
Because another sips
     Her nectar, Death,
          Today
Please kiss these dusty lips,
     And take my breath
          Away.
MetaVerse Oct 2024
Oh, weep for Adonais—he's undead!
    And hath been, lo! these interstitial years!
Yellow and black and pale and hectic red,
    His cockney mood consumptively careers.
Upon a bubbling Hippocrene he's drunk
    And dreaming, standing tiptoe on the brink
Of the wide world that sinks (Byron's a punk)
    As love and fame to nothingness do sink.
An anguished autumn wind doth howl a HOWL
    Of abject grief that sweeps the graveyard's stones.
The sickle moon observes the downy owl
    That eats a mouse from tail to skull and bones.
Zombie Allan Poe, who's green and obscene,
Is sobbing, "Happy Birthday Halloween!"
Oct 2024 · 371
Mushroom Cap
MetaVerse Oct 2024
Frisbee flies
Like a UFO.

Blue skies.

A tic-tac-toe
Of them trails
Called chem trails.

Nanoaliens hatch.

A wonky throw—
He makes the catch!

Oct 2024 · 534
To Dust
MetaVerse Oct 2024

The one flower
Outside the window
Has turned to dust.

Oct 2024 · 479
October 14, 2024
MetaVerse Oct 2024
!hap

pie
e.e.
***

(13
0th)

ming
s' b
irth

day!
Oct 2024 · 1.8k
Danse Française
MetaVerse Oct 2024
There once was a fella from France
Who'd dance a libidinous dance:
     He'd focus the eyes
     Of the club on his thighs,
Then dance himself out of his pants.
Oct 2024 · 1.2k
Jump Scare
MetaVerse Oct 2024
There once was a gal named Alvina,
A registered nurse at a gyne-
     cological practice
     Who brought in a cactus
That jumped on a naked ******.
Oct 2024 · 1.3k
Butter
MetaVerse Oct 2024
There once was a man from Green Bay
Who made it a habit each day
     To ****** an udder
     While churning his butter,
Then go for a nap in the hay.
Oct 2024 · 480
The Old Man of Japan
MetaVerse Oct 2024
There was an Old Man
Of Japan
     Whose limericks would never
     Ever
Scan.
Oct 2024 · 411
Rondeau
MetaVerse Oct 2024
The changing seasons are not more changefull
Then my mistresse; neither more vengefull
Is the wooing autumn wind that seduceth
A singing mood afore it blasteth
With bitter colde, angry and disdainfull.
Her scorne is lyke a scorpion sting painfull
In my sad heart wich bleedeth for banefull
Her who presently nowe observeth
          The changing seasons.
Her cruell scorne capricious entiseth
My heart to dispaire; itt dispaireth
Dailye and dieth from disese most carefull.
Her scorne doth make my harte most woefull,
And so my smartyng heart despiseth
          The changing seasons.
Oct 2024 · 515
Sneezer
MetaVerse Oct 2024
There once was a sneezer named Rose
Who'd sneeze to the tips of her toes:
    She once sneezed so heinous
    She puked out her ****
And blew out her brains through her nose.
Oct 2024 · 525
To Autumn
MetaVerse Oct 2024
O Autumn! thou hast splendidly array'd
     Nature, whose robes are treasure-rich with colour.
A patchy quilt of dying leaves decay'd,
     Thou blanketest the world with deathly dolour.
I hear a voice inside my head.  I list.
     "Come buy, come buy," I hear in my mind's ear.
The pulse doth quicken suddenly in my wrist:
     The netherworld hath never been so near.
I hearken to the rattling of the leaves
     That hang like vampyre bats from skeletal trees.
The songful birds that nested 'neath the eaves
     Have long since flown away with high degrees.
I'm cold and getting colder, and my breath
Is telling me I'm close to coming Death.
Sep 2024 · 1.5k
Under My Skin
MetaVerse Sep 2024
You're in my head; you're in
          Like rabies.
I've got you under my skin,
          Like scabies.  

You're in my heart; you're heart-
          Attacking.
You crack me up.  I ****.
          I'm cracking.
Sep 2024 · 621
The Fall
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Another yellow leaf,
     Another red
Descends like grief on grief.
Another yellow leaf
Whispering, "Life is brief,"
Descends from overhead
Another yellow leaf,
     Another red.
Sep 2024 · 785
Crow
MetaVerse Sep 2024

The crow in the tree
Is actually          
A black trash bag.    

Sep 2024 · 1.0k
Kiss
MetaVerse Sep 2024

In the middle of midnight,
Night and morning kiss and part:
Parting is such sweet sorrow.

Sep 2024 · 585
The Sphinx
Sep 2024 · 301
the fall
MetaVerse Sep 2024
the fall
     ing leaf
is all
the fall;
i call
     my grief
the fall
     ing leaf


Sep 2024 · 1.0k
A Double-dactyl on Dickinson
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Emily shmemily,
Emily Dickinson,
Recluse and poetess,
Rendered her rhyme

Idiosyncrously,
Much of her poetry
Reading most cryptically
Much of the time.
idiosyncrously – like "idiosyncratically" but doubly dactyllic
Sep 2024 · 837
Li'l Moo
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Moo Deng
Is too deng
Adorable,
And if you disagree with me (about anything) then you're
          terrible, horrible, torrible and—******!—just absolutely
          ******* deplorable!
Sep 2024 · 697
A Leaf Falls
MetaVerse Sep 2024

A yellow leaf falls          
And hits me in the stomach:    
Last day of summer.

Sep 2024 · 370
Ignoble Numbers
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Robert Herrick,
Poet and cleric,
Wrote numbers that were noble
When they weren't ignoble.
Sep 2024 · 959
Sheepish
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Little Bo Peep
Has lost her sheep.
The big bad wolf is full
And sleeping on a bed of wool.
Sep 2024 · 448
#hashtag
MetaVerse Sep 2024

#this #little #gnome
#is #a #pome


#no #notes
Sep 2024 · 363
Father God
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Father God
Doesn't spare the rod
Or spoil
Any boi or goil.
Sep 2024 · 446
Trump Card
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Donald Trump
******* King Chump,
And now he's gonna take down
Queen Clown.
Sep 2024 · 421
Robert Frost
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Robert Frost
Loved and lost
Much
But never lost his touch.
Sep 2024 · 600
Aryan Nation
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Adolf ******
Was a lot littler
Than most Aryan brothers
And their mothers.
Sep 2024 · 247
The Raven
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Edgar Allan Poe
Never wrote a poem about a crow,
But he did write a poem about a misbehavin'
Raven.
Sep 2024 · 159
Clerihew
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Edmund Clerihew Bentley
Invented an eminently
Humorous verse form
Which is also a terse form.
Sep 2024 · 595
1
MetaVerse Sep 2024
1
a s

now
f

lake
d
rea
m

s at
op
a on

ce
up
on a
tim

e mo
unta

in


Sep 2024 · 868
ZzzZzzZzzing
MetaVerse Sep 2024


        Where
          you
          are
     dreaming   :
          are
    ­      you
        There



Sep 2024 · 1.1k
》》》》》》》
Sep 2024 · 401
Mad Libs
MetaVerse Sep 2024
I have a _ _ _.
It smells like _ _ _.
My _ _ _ is _ _ _
And isn't _ _ _.

When I feel _ _ _,
I _ _ _ a rose
Or _ _ _ a _ _ _.
Go _ _ _   _ _ _   _ _ _!


Sep 2024 · 294
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
MetaVerse Sep 2024
Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛­⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛­⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
No⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛­⬛
⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
     ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛
     ⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛⬛.
Sep 2024 · 381
Christ Is
Sep 2024 · 369
alphabet soup
MetaVerse Sep 2024
q                                                      h         ­                           r

t                                  ­         x
                                                               ­                                                   p

                                            a     ­                                                           
                                                                ­  
z                                                   y
                                                      

i love u
        c                                                      ­                               j
                                ­       m
w                    

                       d                                                                ­        n              
                       b        

          k                                            
                                                                ­                     
                                  f

      ­                     s                                                            g   ­                 
                          

Aug 2024 · 587
An Impractical Cat
MetaVerse Aug 2024

        ^         ^
       My kitty
        cat's an                                        
           imp
       ra cti cal                            
    purrrrrrfect
  little dainty fat                    
    little lady cat                                                         .
       who uses                                                                  s
         her litter box while wearing her white sock
                                     

Aug 2024 · 664
Pedicurianism
MetaVerse Aug 2024

Like the rounded tip
Of God's clipped big toenail,
The late August moon.

Aug 2024 · 110
Titanic
MetaVerse Aug 2024
The ship is going down;
     The passengers panic.
I write and wait to drown
     Aboard the Titanic.
Aug 2024 · 1.2k
Aroma Therapy
MetaVerse Aug 2024
Antique
paper
& ink
& glue,
a fragrance
I drink
in through
my nose,
fragrant
like a dead rose.
I fan my face,
& fall into
an antique book
aroma coma.
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