The only art I'm good at, is the art of being lonely.

I'm tired but let's do another day to see if things change.

Deleting my feelings

I had some beautiful words in my mind but the disappear like your love has left my life.

You can't control feelings.
Feelings control you.

A feeling
That will never be the same.

I know it is me.
It is my fault.
I loved you so hard, for so long.
But I've known.
There is another one.
Another person,
Who is making you feel better.
More than I could.
If I was home right now
Then the only thing that was home,
Was my body.
My life doesn't have a purpose anymore.
How did I get so fuckt up.
****
I wanna talk
But I know
That I won't control myself.
So that's why I stare at te white wall infront of me.
No emotions
Just me
But who is me?
That's a question that no one can answer.

20 Sept 2019: I don't know

I'm not even hurt.
I'm not confused.
I'm happy, because of a person who is not you.

My words make sense in my head.
But not on paper

If I'm only something that's in your way.
I'll leave

I still feel the anger of the fight I had 7 months ago.
I laugh at it now, even though I probably shouldn't.

I wish that I could reach out to your heart and hold it.
But your heart is an earthquake.
Just like mine.

All these emotions,
all these perfect feelings to put on a paper.
But still nothing seems right.

All the words that I wanted to say,
a re gone
I need to take a deep breath and calm down.
But I can't.
The look in your eyes are drowning me.
I can only think of one thing.
And that is pressing my lips against yours.