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Kale Sep 13
These roaming thoughts
Keep crashing in my head
Forcing me to remember
How lonely it felt
To be with you
How you pushed me aside
To love on another.
I asked,
Wondered,
Begged
For a future with you.
But it seems that I’m not worthy
Of such hope.
My loneliness will consume
My fleeting happiness
I will always feel neglected
Nexus Apr 4
I wake up wet and cold at 4AM
So I look in my ashtray for the biggest joint end.
I smoke what's left and lay back for two secs...
Next I check the grinder for any remaining specks.
I bang out all that I can and roll a splith with trembling hands.

As smoke enters my lungs, a tear fills my eye.
Exhaling all hope I begin cry.

I do this to myself with no happiness in life.
I can't control myself this has become my life.
I often ask myself what I want from life.
And find myself wishing that I wasn't alive.
Drug addiction affect everyone differently.
Aishath Hana Feb 19
Hi. How are you today?
She answered with a sigh, "Deeply unhappy"

I wish I had the courage to say it out loud.

But i am a coward who always hid behind a fake smile.
Andrew Dec 2021
Every night  
before I sleep
I close my eyes
and begin to weep

I lay there watching
the curtains sway
In a room
I painted black and grey

Will the morning
ever come
why do I hope
to see the sun
when tomorrow
I’ll be mad
hopelessly
feeling numb
what hurts isn't the wanting to leave, it's the wanting to stay
welcome back, unhappiness.
it's been a while since we have last met.
would you say a year or so?
would you say since I've met him?

you give me these bad thoughts.
the kind that make me not want to want things.
the kind that sees no good ending.
why must you attack me again?

what have I done to deserve this?
Amanda Kay Burke Aug 2021
Go crazier and crazier the longer you stay
Cry all night
Sleep half the day
You remain by side throughout the upheaval
You are capable of delivering me from evil
Something is not right between us
Cannot place my finger
On the imperfection
The air of frustration lingers
So I am caught in between your feelings and my own
Thoughts collide within
Creating cyclone
Moving in mind with force
Trail of mayhem in it's wake
Causing already hurting head to violently throb and ache
As I ponder what to do time tumbles out of my hands
My reflexes are too slow to catch before it lands
Clock is never on my side whether I turn left or right
No matter which way I examine
Predicament not black and white
Waiting for next error so I have a good excuse
The longer it takes the more I ask myself
"What is the use?"
You deserve to be with somebody equally devoted
Why the truth I'm telling you is not sugar-coated
I wish you would come to this conclusion without my aid
You are simply too optimistic I'm afraid
I hate doing this to you but I feel it is more fair
Being straightforward with you than to leave you unaware
Your heart may feel broken
It will only be for awhile
Promise that without me you'll again learn how to smile
Written in may but if I had known he was just using me I wouldn't have been so concerned about his feelings...
mark soltero Aug 2021
look in my eyes
please don't mind me
i'm not unhappy
unaware of how the world works
i only patronize you sarcastically

please show me your skin i say
stop hiding behind silence
we will see a better day
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