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Tugging at the empty void,
In hoping there might be something else
Something more to call your own
You keep your eyes open,
As if the more you look the more you see

But the more you see,
All you see is darkness
Your failures and incorrect fragmentations

Oh woe with me,
these scars run oh so deep
What hope is there for me?

Perhaps I can call someone "friend"
hold their hand and
have my first kiss

I dream, I dream, I dream
I dream of something more
Beyond the realm of truth

Tugged this way and that
I'll be stuck in my own discretions
My own damages, my own keys

A singular phrase breaks my wounded mind
As if someone actually cares
About what lies beneath this wickedness

Carry on,

Carry on,

and repeat.




Until the feelings I have lost
The warmth of your embrace
The hope I find once again
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You take pictures of books you'll never read
write words you'll never truly know
and speak ideas taken from people that did.

But it's so common
and you're not the only one doing it
it's a whole spectrum of people
creating nothing
but consuming everything.

They may be just words,
but those words belong to someone
and without the person
they act without purpose--
repeatable, but with no meaning.

So few take what they have
to mold reality into new creations
that eventually the consuming will be consumed.
Leaving only an echo of what used to be
the cacophony of life--
it will become a mass of sounds
unrecognizable to the words we used to know.
If you repeat things long enough they'll lose whatever impact/meaning they had in the first place.  Sometimes you don't need to be clever, instead it's best to be cleverless and just take a risk to invent something new.
i can't seem to sleep
your touch lingers on my thoughts
you're always on my mind
collecting all the dust
cleaning out all the bad stuff
it's moving day for us
we've been turning this into something good
if that's really the truth, why am i up so long -
my eyelids like weights
my body like quicksand,
stuck in this place called "you" -
thinking about us and how it could all be so wrong
"never date your ex"
isn't that what they say?
i always tell myself that so why can't i stay away?
i'm stuck in this tidal wave
you're pulling me in
pulling me in
i'm afraid i might be pulled under again, you see
i do not want to drown again
not again
not because of you
honey, if you're going to stay, please just stay for good
why tear down my walls again like you're just chopping up wood
with an ax
right where it hurts the most
and the scary thing is, if you left, it probably wouldn't hurt
it's just a battle on repeat
the same wound again, i'm numb
you can't hurt me anymore
so if you're going to hurt me, just do it
that way, i wouldn't have to peek around every corner
wondering if it's the end of us
Nyx Oct 6
Take my heart
Break it in two
Crumble it to pieces
Its okay I want you too

Tell me pretty lies
Syrup dipped candy
You're words have such sweetness
Keep on drinking that brandy

Beat around the bush
Play you're little games
Run wild and free
Be sure to fasten my chains

Kiss that other girl
Play me like an upright base
Feed me those excuses
Let the tears pour down my face

Allow me to feel the love
Thats as plastic as that grin
False sense of security
Call it my original sin

Take another trophy
Place it upon your shelf
Right next to the rest of them
I'm sure your proud of yourself

Throw me away once at the end
Once you've had your fill
Just like the rest of them
I'll tumble downhill

I'll cry out my heart
Desperately want you back
But just like the rest of them
I was just another past time snack

I'm ****** I know
But hit play
I'm stuck on repeat

Help me.....

Blade Maiden Oct 4
I don't think I know
where to begin or
where to go
How to leave chance behind
how to change perceptions
how to treat my own mind

I don't know
why I have this need
to share and to show
Exactly where I stand
ever spilling heart in hand

I don't know why
I keep asking for truth
from strangers only passing by
Same old retreat
numbing sadness on repeat

I have no idea
what to tell you now
how to make myself more clear
How to leave and how to save
how to make my feet behave

I'm a glass full of shards
a peculiar collection
lots of shiny unknown parts
I don't know who I am anymore
I don't think I knew before
Kmary Oct 3
Today I woke with a familiar dread
a storm of my own;
a whirlwind of insecurities

It's an intrusive self-created enemy,
that disguises my fears as truths

There have been nights too
where I sleep with my demon
and once again awake to yesterday's past

Eno Sep 5
Run my fingers through the water
Around and round
The ripples

All life’s wanderings
Placed in order
Ready to repeat

Winds whip up the autumn leaves
And I am
Andrew Apr 17
They keep ratcheting up the pressure
They keep hatcheting for good measure
They keep laughing at their leisure
They keep blasting guns for pleasure
Creating a series of tubes
Where every which way I lose

There's an existential
From my potential
That's unintentional
For I want to be better
Than the scarlet letter
That's my resume header
And my pain embedder

But there's a series of events
That keep happening
That leaves everyone incensed
They start attacking me
Until I take my mask off
They uncomfortably back off
Get in their rocket and blast off
Until it's humanity I'm the last of

There's a pattern
That gives me purpose
So I climb a ladder
Of fruitless searches
For a freedom purchase
From a shame merchant
Who offers the joy of fantasy
At the price of a crushing reality
So I can hear Satan answering
As a doctor trying to cure my malady

I feel shame
Then humiliation
This repetitive game
Provides inspiration
To avoid every friendship
Because my love will end it
And bring a torture endless
So either way I'll be friendless
After I reluctantly ask
And they say no
Am I still expected to bask
In their beautiful glow?

I see a range of emotions
From pathetic pity to anger
Always leaving the notion
I live in a city of strangers
And walls of concrete
That can't be beat
One must take a seat
And accept defeat
Then repeat
Dream Aug 3
















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