He had proposed me openly on the road,
I used to ignore thinking him a crazy lover.
One day even slapped after getting irritated,
But he was really crazy,
Painted me also in his colour of love.
Started a new life with him and fought to the whole family,
At first he was addicted by me then alcohol was intoxicating.
And one day, he went very far,left me alone
Months passed,couldn't forget.
Also couldn't give place to someone in this rude life.
He has returned to my threshold once again
This is his desire to make a place again in my life
He's back . !!!
Today when I was sitting alone thinking about us then habitually i pick up my phone ...What I saw was heart dropping .
He sent me a song cover of his own . And texted me how are you .
This is it . The conversation began .
He was in hell , still he's going through a lot of ******* situation .
I don't know but when he suddenly withdraw from everywhere i had this feeling something is going on. ..I knew he'll be back ....
Today I felt one thing the most...
Trust and let go .
If he's yours he will surely be back ..❤️
It's not like I had restricted all my life happiness for him.... but i love this man and how am I suppose to feel good when he's gone by saying I'll be back soon ..I was worried , heartbroken...I was in a roller coaster of thoughts for 19 days ..But not for once I had any doubt on our love ....I knew he will be back ..
We don't know exactly what goes on a person when he/she's left alone.
Today I don't know what I feel .
Last night I had a fight with the whole family and if felt like I should I die in that moment .
I cried my heart out . Do you know I get allergy attacks everytime i cry. I get so sick . My body starts to ache . I didnt have the energy to lift my head .
I was tired of those mental presures ,
I was tired of crying .
When i fell asleep i didnt realise . Maybe last night i slept for hours after you left .
My body was drained , it had no energy .
After you are gone i ve been facing a lot of things and i crave your presence so much . I am taking a lot of decisions alone . You were someone i could talked atleast about the things i dont know or what am i suppose to do in those situations...
I was angry at you last night ....I feel so alone but as you've said you'll be back ..!!!
I am holding on babe ..😔 please come back soon.
Never leave your love ones alone by saying you'll be back or you need space . You can have space even after staying with them. But please realise what goes on a person when he/she us suddenly left alone . I don't know how long I can write about us . Everything around me is so suffocating .
Day - 01
It been 16 days since I've heard from you.
Your last massege was
' i will be back soon '
At first I thought maybe you'll feel okay in 3/4/5 days ...Maybe a week ..
But it been 16 days .."Soon" word seem very long .
I was deluded with your words but still I don't have any negative feelings about you .
I feel very alone , sad , i cry a lot these days .
Memories flashbacks in front of my eyes .
I badly wanna see you , hear your voice , touch you , feel you .
Where are you .
I feel like asking you " will you ever gonna come back " ????
Or did you left me forever .
I wish I could show you how much badly hurt i am ... Please come back . 💔😔
Maybe I should post about my feelings everyday . So one day when you'll come back i can show you how I've been . I don't wanna be misunderstood . I know you're in trouble and you asked to give you space ...And I will never invade in your life ...But don't you miss me ..???? 😔😔
Up in the air
It is smoke and dust
More clouds in place
Up to the moon
Take me away
Let's leave anyway
Into the sky
If it was up to me
I'd never come back.
Everybody needs a *****
No thanks I can create on my own
My idiosyncratic thinking
Is bouncy as the suns atom
Looking for a reason to capitalise
On mind control apparatus
But read on please you
Can become my apprentice
Because this poetry can heal
Dimensions of the brain
A poetic analeptic that heals
When feeling down at heel
The bidirectional pulse wave
Of another person is not a desire
My encephalon is creative
Enough to excite you on the microwave
So adjust the frequency
Even try shortwave to find life
In space because this poet
Has no ***** dependency
My style is cramped with the BCI
Purloin’s my opportunity
To be unique in writing
Being a survivor & spry
The invasion of privacy is deplorable
Taking advantage of the poor you do
You have privacy so should I too
Reading people’s brain is irreconcilable
Don’t need two people to write a pen
I don’t want to be a ***** in the pig sty
And get ***** with other ranks of pigs
Every person’s brain is a personal den
BCI - Brain Computer Interface
Analeptic - adjective
(chiefly of a drug) tending to restore a person's health or strength; restorative.
Spry - adjective (spryer, spryest)
(especially of an old person) active; lively: he continued to look spry and active well into his eighties.
Purloin -verb [with object] formal or humorous
steal (something): he must have managed to purloin a copy of the key.
Pen - verb (pens, penning, penned) [with object]
write or compose: Olivia penned award-winning poetry.
I was thinking
Thinking what did I do wrong
Wrong that you suddenly left
Left without saying goodbye
And then I remember that
That I am more than enough
Enough not to beg you comeback
Comeback to leave again
The moment I saw you
we became partners
Spending time everyday with you
making us even more better pranksters
The galaxy of memories I shared with you
are always unaccountable
And the moments I spend with you
are always unforgettable
But I never thought that day would day come
when I've to say goodbye to you
Then, indeed that day once came
when you left me without your trace.....
missing you so much
I wish to see you again
I was under the impression that even with this crippling depression I could count on the thought of you to keep me from my regression into the pain that is felt when you are absent
I was wrong.
I just wanted to hold you in my arms, I was so scared of letting go, I watched as you walk away, leaving me to my thoughts alone
Thinking I'm not good enough.
These thoughts, a Tsunami, its destruction attempting to tear apart my life, taunts and seeks control over me. But I, desperately waiting for you, resist them.
I have been searching for what I could say that would bring you to love me again. I try to call out to you begging for an answer begging for you to come back.
But I know you won't. the nature of the comfort you sought has brought you into another's heart
But I need you!
I need you to tell me!
I need to know why!
Why I wasn't enough?!?
Why did you leave!?!?
Be the one who accepts me.....
Just like you promised.....
You be my Bonnie, I'll be your Clyde.
Together, we'll take this life for one hell of a ride.
You be my Thelma, I'll be your Louise.
We'll get in the car and do whatever we **** well please.
Life on the run with the one you love may sound fun.
But no matter how far or how fast you go,
eventually you will always fly too close to the sun.
It may seem natural to flee
but it doesn't matter if you run from pain or fear.
Your mind is like an elephant.
It never forgets so your problems will always reappear.
What you choose to do is up to you.
But take it from me.
Talking about your pain will set you free