The sun rose early
to regain her warmth
with a kiss from her lover

In a filed of sunflowers,
only one worshiped
the sun’s burning desire

If you wish to grow these
sunflowers within my blue walls

Know that I am a house
the sun never visits, but I have:

Vacant rooms
with burning lovers

Floors
with footprints of dead florists

Albums
with nostalgic photographs of her

A single bed
on my scorching roof

Stairs
that creak to the rhythm of my growing pain

Doors
with engraved haikus

Mirrors
that reflect her image in front of my blue walls

I fear my brittle heart cannot
bear another harsh winter

On a quiet night
when my soul departs,
do not suffer

Though I will be asleep for
the many winters to come

Tenderly, I shall
embrace thee in a dream

The rain is pouring,
an orchid is drowning,
and you are still sleeping

The rain knows
only how to fall heavily,
and still remains beautiful

But I know only the
loneliness of December

She left me with a bouquet of
flowers that never bloomed,
and a muse with bleeding
verses that never rhymed

At nights when her name
is dancing on my tongue,
I hunger for the cherries
she once promised to feed me

I wonder if the filed of lavender
sighs when it yearns for her scent

I wonder if the sunflowers
worship her raven hair
like the sun

I wonder if the moon weeps
with longing over her absence  

I wonder if the sky turns pink
when the spring breeze
touches her silky skin

I wonder if the cherries bleed in her
mouth like my heart when she left

Lover,
I need you to stand still
with your feet in the water

Let me drink your reflection
to quench my thirst as you
try to hide your tender smile

I beg of you,
don't leave me,
because then the sun will burn me,
and the sea will swallow my ashes

If the sky turns pink
when the spring breeze
touches her silky skin

If the filed of lavender sighs
when it yearns for her scent

If the sunflowers
worship her raven hair
like the sun

If the moon weeps with
longing over her absence  

If a thorny flower
hurts liker her

Would my grave be
deeper than my wounds?

Would the warmth of the morning sun
still reach my rotten body?

Would Icarus, my bird, fly to the sun looking for me
Is my selfish death going to cost him his wings, too?

Would the worms weep when
they ******* tormented flesh?

Your soul wanders at
the edge of my heart

Your footsteps when you
left still rings in my ears

Your scent filled my
lungs till I suffocated

You haunt my dreams,
now I write to your ghost

You poured your honey into my
hungry mouth like slow poison

You said love won't save us,
and my heart stopped

If I can’t swallow your frigid heart
then let me kiss the traces of your
loneliness with my ugly mouth

And on a sleepless night
when your soul needs a cure,
I will be there with lavender tea

Aching,
I stood under the sun,
and for a fleeting moment I saw
death’s shadow aligning with mine

My tears are
saltier than the ocean’s

My heart is
heavier than Sisyphus’ rock

My secrets
that I buried beneath my
skin has turned into scars

My body is
but a graveyard

Come and lay your body
upon my empty bed,
and pour your
scent on its sheets

Whisper of your pain
and glee to my pillow,
and leave a lock of your
red-brown hair under it

Only then will I
be able to sleep,
and my eyes will
no longer weep

Come and rest your
head upon my pillow,
and trace your fingers
along the tear stains

Now, close your eyes,
I will be waiting
for you in a dream

Let us not talk
about family

My father
is the word absence

And my mother
is the word fear

I will shatter my heart
before I break yours  

I will rip out my eyes
before I make yours cry

And I will always love you even when
your heart is no longer beating for mine

My brittle heart
longs to be held
by your small hand

I catch a star in my palm, and
it brightens my dark thoughts

God is far from me tonight,
so I pray to the moon

The midday sun burns me
like my mother’s touch

I am the sunflower that
grows in your garden,
and worships you like the sun

The clock is stuck at 3:33 AM,
my mind is stuck in yesterday

I drink a glass of water,
and wait for my heart
to stop bleeding

My soul weeps,
but I don’t stop writing

Orchids,
bird wings,
moonlight,
deep sleep,
and your small hands

At nights when I can’t utter
a word from my ugly mouth

My eyes pour out the words,
and I make a wish to be yellow

Here,
take my fragile heart,
it is yours to break

Here,
take my tormented soul,
it holds but agonizing pain

Here,
take my sleepy eyes,
they have shed enough tears

Here,
take my whole body,
I wish to disappear completely

In your cold absence,
I have forgotten what
the word warmth meant

Perhaps you were  
the word warmth

But now, you are
the word silence

I talk to you,
but you do not talk back

I cannot sleep, my dear
You see, yesterday the sound
of waves crashing inside my
mind kept me up all night

I’ve been at war with my past,
and I failed to make peace with it

Now my bed is on fire and nothing
remains of my heart but the ashes;
I beg of you don’t ask me to stay
alive for another sleepless night

Lover, I’m weary
and I long to sleep

In the midst of her loneliness,
she sings a song of agony,
but no one is around to hear it

Her voice fades away in the cold air;
as she sinks slowly into the darkness
that surrounds her anguished heart

I wish to exhale every painful memory,
and wash it away with my salty tears

But my tears had stopped
shedding when I learned
how to bleed instead of cry

Mother,
don’t fright when you
see my blood on the floor,
I was only crying

You’ve brought me into this world,
and you’re the reason I want to leave it

You were supposed to mend
my wounds when I got hurt
not be the reason behind them

You were supposed to protect
me from any danger,
but you were the danger itself

Your piercing eyes and
cruel hands still haunt me,
and I cannot find any peace

I needed you to tell me
I’m safe when I was scared,
but nothing is more
scarier than you, mother

Today I miss you
despite every promise I
swore to my fragile heart—

I saw you in a dream and
I was finally happy again

When I awoke your voice
was still stuck in my ear,
but your loving hand
had let go of mine
long ago

This morning I stared at my
veins, and I realized they’re as
blue as an ocean during sunrise

And I’ve been drowning in
myself since my first breath

For how long must I
breathe underwater?

Am I still alive if my soul
feels like it's sinking
endlessly
into the abyss?

My favorite color used to be yellow,
it was my sun,
it kept me warm and happy

But as I grew older crimson
became my favorite color

A slow death,
crimson drips from my wrists
as I turn cold and pale

I wear a sweater no
matter the weather

It keeps me warm
and hides my shame

Sometimes I forget
what my arms look like,
but every time I try to look

I see only the scars that has
slowly healed but never faded,
and I am reminded of my pain

And so I wear a sweater no
matter how hot the weather

I'm the warm cup of coffee
he drinks every morning,
but today he's forgotten me

I've been waiting for his
mouth to swallow me all day,
and I'm losing my warmth with
each time he forgets to drink me

After months,
his tongue longed for my sweet taste,
but now I'm cold, bitter, and sour

When I am alone,
I hear the sound of the woeful ocean
waves crashing inside my mind,
and a distant voice of a sailor
crying out for help underwater

He is sinking
slowly
inside the ship
along with his sadness

The sailor and I tried
to drown our sorrows,
but we sunk together in
an ocean of melancholy

My eyes has been
wide open all night
like a corpse’s eyes

Would you come and
gently close them for
me so I can finally sleep?

The reason why I look away when
I notice his blue eyes gazing at me

Is that I am afraid if I stared into
them for too long I will drown

Now that he is gone,
I long to drown

If the sun rises and I don’t
see your face tomorrow

Know that you were the
only tender guest that
visited my fragile heart
without tearing it apart

And if the sun sets and dies,
and you’re not by my side

My eyes will forget how to sleep,
and I will remember you and weep

And if a year passes by
and I don’t hear your voice

My heart will no longer beat,
and I will surrender in defeat

She held a heart
tangled by sunflowers,
and a soul dipped in honey

Her voice is
like a soft prayer,
able to convert
an atheist to a priest

Her yellow gaze is the
meaning of happiness  

Her laugh could turn
a cloudy bleak morning
into a sunny melodic haven

I swear on sunflowers
and your eyes
For they’re the only two lovesome
things my eyes have seen and fell for

Despair drips
from my lips,
don't kiss me

My sorrowful soul
awaits death’s kiss,
don’t miss me

My fingers used to
always smell of her,
her scent would linger
on my clothes for days

Now that she has left,
my fingers reek of cigarettes,
and my clothes remain unwashed

All I want is for my skin to
absorb her scent once again

But this is not a poem,
and she has changed her perfume

I thirst with
an ache for
something I
cannot name

So in death I shall
quench my thirst

Hold my trembling hand
and end my agony

Look me in my eyes filled with longing,
for they feel bliss at the very sight of you

Listen to my anguished heart,
for it yearns to be laced with yours  

Lick my salty tears,
for they shed over your unbearable absence

Kiss my quivering lips,
for they whisper your name like a prayer

Stop living in my dreams
and be here with me

Today,
a cloud has weeped for me,
she poured her tears upon my
face and washed my wounds

People call the
sky’s tears as rain,
but my tears are salty
and dripping with pain

An eyelash stuck
on my left cheek,
she gently removes it
and tells me to make a wish

Her fingers smell like
orange peel and the sun

Her mouth tastes like
citrus and rose water

When she left I peeled an orange,
and wiped away the salty tears
with my citrus fingers

And with every eyelash
that fell on my wet cheek,
I whispered a wish
for her to come back

Death is like you,
silent, cold, and
doesn’t love me back

If you are death
then I long to be dead