Who is this girl I see below me who holds this far off stare
She holds no concern for me as I dance through the air

I live in a world of colors far away from pain
I'm not the girl that is constantly trapped inside her own brain

I wander far away in floating fields of cotton
The agony and my blade are long ago forgotten

There is a tugging at my core and I know it's almost time
Her cries pull me back and into her skin I climb.

We are all in a labyrinth
Each of us stuck in the never ending twists and turns,
Wandering around aimlessly scouring the earth.

There are monsters there
Hidden among the shadows and corners of our maze,
We are stuck full of fear.

What about the great perhaps?
The hope of something more,
The chance that there is something to progress?

Twists and turns
Never ending hallways and isolating darkness,
There is Freedom to those who yearn.

Straight and fast
They say is the only way out,
Straight and fast out of this horrid trap.

The labyrinth is ***'s cruel joke
Like mice in a maze,
We are toys to poke.

I want out of this place
The monsters close at my heel,
It's so dark I'm going to suffocate.

I can't stop running
I have to keep moving,
Never stop running.

There is only one way out of this labyrinth
I know what I need to do now,
I need be sweet release of death.

A dagger to the heart
Or a drug overdose,
Something to end this hurt.

I'm free at last
The darkness is gone,
Finally with my last breath.

It's so beautiful here
Here at the end of it all,
Songs of birds fill my ear.

At last I am here
It's so beautiful,
I'm at last free of fear.

No monsters
No pain,
No more twists and turns.

Don't worry about me
I'm happy now,
It's so beautiful here.

Today was hard,

Like every day,
But worse,

And it pushed me,
To the edge,

I couldn’t handle it,
So now,

I’m laying here,
Feeling this pain,

Hoping,
It will go away,

All because,
I gave up today,

Because life is a game,
And I wouldn’t play.

end of my elementary school years i had a diary.
a boy i had a crush on broke my heart and i wrote in my diary on a page somewhere in between the middle and the end about how i was
                 emo.
about how i wanted to cut my wrists and be sad all the time.

my parents found this diary and found this page and questioned me until i said it was all a lie and i didn't even know what emo really was.

i keep a diary online now, and i occasionally cut myself, and i wonder if my parents ever think i'm emo.

would i be able to lie and tell them i don't know what emo is? or would they look at the scars and wonder when i really found out what being emo was.

It’s getting bad again.
My skin is scratching, itching, burning.
I want to rake my nails down my wrist
just to relieve a little pressure.

It’s building up inside me.
I’m afraid that I’ll explode
and imbed shrapnel in those
who are closest to me.

I shy away
and leave myself alone.
Better to suffer in silence
than to make others worry.

I want to press a blade
deep into my hips.
To feel the blood bubbling up
and all my pressure-pain-panic
leaving with
each drop that flows down my thigh.

Just like old times.

I'm scared if a lot of things;

The night; for it keeps tricking me into bad situations

My dreams; for they keep turning into nightmares I can't escape

But most of all I'm terrified of my thoughts.
My mind is twisted,
messed up,
and I can't untangle it.

I don't want to,
but I'm so mislead.

I'm scared,
and I need your help.

For the root and spark in all my fears is also a friend I keep near.
It's sharp,
made of steel,
and fuels my dreams.

It's always there in the dark night
and keeps me company.
It paints my canvas red
and it makes me feel again.

My biggest fear is to cut.



-j.m.k

why'd you do it?

he asked,
holding my hands.

i glanced at my wrists

i wanted to feel
on the outside
what i did on the inside
so i could convince myself
it was real
after all

and he cried

but
he
never
came
back.

You struggle with your pain
Yet still helped me anyways
To reach more to gain
Even if no one stays

A sonnet dedicated to you
With a new happiness born
Yet you're filled with blue
As your wiery heart's worn

I know your soul's torn,
But I'm here to repair
Your rose, not only a thorn
To live with no despair

I know how you've been shoved
I know soon you'll be loved