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Clyde 1d
The wind's howling
and the temperature now
keeps slowly slowly falling
to the point were
you're ex's heart
might be considered warm

What?
You don't believe me?
Well,
I don't blame you
because frankly,
I don't believe myself
Behold;
a conversation

How can I?
When my own mind is filled with delusions
Lies and haunting horrors of the past?
What am I saying,
I have long-since gotten over that baggage
I am not my past, but my present and my future
and those who judge me by the past
can forever exist in it!

However, I feel that...

I don't have any friends
it's true; all I have are sunflowers
who bask collectively in the sun's golden light
reaching high for their aspiration
and never look down to see
the dirt they've dug themselves in
or ether side to their fellow plant
with odd-looking creatures
coming by to **** their color dry
whilst enhancing their rainbow of colors
all aimed to shine the most amongst themselves and the flowers
because most are only in it for themselves,
their own personal gains where they're ego's are messaged
gently stroked, grown and nestled
and because doing this
feels good and keeps them safe

I will never be loved
how can I? look at me
look at the filth I'm covered it
observe
the dark, heavy, tear-soak sandbags under the eyes
the tired, but stiff shoulders
the back straight with tension
and a slight tremor
from anxiety
notice
the weight-loss from  the depression
and how insomnia
causes blood-shot eyes
dizziness and loss of balance

I will never be happy
when deep inside
all there is is darkness and gloom
hidden under layers
of canvases painted with water-colors
that are slowly washed away with every rainy season
and watch as in time
as each layer is washed and removed
reveals
the dark, thick, heavy sludge
that is my world
(this is the part were most
are ether too scared to come near and run
others simply turn and leave
and worst of all
they watch you slowly melt and fall
while they feed of your pain and misery)

I will never be accepted
and this existence is much less than expected
they will judge, criticize, scrutinize
your ever imperfection, dent, cut, bruise
curl, wave, volume, curves
because the world demands
that those that shine too bright
need to be dampened
for others
can't shine so bright

'Let them in'
a voice whispers
'let them in, they won't bat an eye
they see a light
in the darkness that you don't see.
Just open and they'll come,
it's O.K to be scared
to expose that most vulnerable part of yourself
because in that part of yourself
you find,
yourself'

And so I did
I opened my doors,
smiled, gave a bow
and waited for them to come inside.

But no one did.
I've been gong through a rough period recently in which, as it can be seen, my mentality has not been the sanest.....this is the result of my pain
Julie 1d
shadows are stretching over the walls,
moonlight brightens my room,
clouds are trying to veil his countenance,
and the church bell rings midnight

milk with honey should take me to sleep,
but adrenaline flows trough my veins,
dark secrets keep me awake
and occupy my head
like a knight the hostile fortress

finding no sleep, no rest
on my balcony I smoke the last cigarette
before the sun rises,
before the morning dawn;
before the magic of the night fades
and the secrets turn into reality
Dream 3d
Its 3.30 am and im still up....

The web has me entangled....
Jayson 4d
Will you know?
Will you really know-
The pain-
The hurt-
The suffering?

The long nights-
Awake.
The long days-
Asleep.

Fighting-
Winning-
Losing-
Giving up.

Have you known?
Have you really known-
The cuts-
The scars-
The injuries?

Battles-
Fought.
Wars-
Lost.

Do you know?
Do you really know-
Everything,
Every little thing,
That we went through?
Abby M 5d
If sleep is a portal through time
Then I haven’t found that white rabbit to follow down the hole
To magical adventures
Instead I sit in heavy consciousness under this tree
Waiting for him to appear
Arianna Dec 7
Blood in a bottle
I imbibe, fade as the thoughts
Stir and come alive.
eli Dec 5
11.45pm
hi, guess what i'm listening to country music right now
and i cant text you because my parents took my phone and laptop:(
so ill just write this and you can read it later
i love you

11.50pm
i just ran dowstairs amd almost tripped and died
but its like all good
i had to get my chocolate milk
imma watch cat videos until im tired

12.00am
okay well i lied
i started watching horror movie trailers and now im scared
im still listening to country
im soo bored

12.20am
jeez my parents just came home because they forgot their keys for something and somehow noticed i was up and gave me sleeping pills
so i kinda wanna die but its all good
i just listened to the song H.O.L.Y and now 16 is playing
not a bad song

12.25am
i was thinking about how you always say opposites attract
and like thats not wrong because we're really different people
but like i was thinking about it
and i think i kinda get it now
we're opposite, or at least we were before we started dating but we kinda tried to like the stuff the other person likes
like i wouldve never started listening to country if it wasnt for you
and you probably wouldnt have tried listening to the music i like
and you probably wouldnt have tried to write poetry
so like i think thats why people say opposites attract, because we show eachother new stuuf and like idk

12.32am
well i just remembered i have a health test tomorrow so i should probably study but i cant do that tomorrow in the morning or later

ughhhh im still not tired
oh guess what?
i love you soooooooo much
and youre amazing and great and one of my favourite people

1.00am
okay well the pills are really kicking in now
so goodnight
i love you
Isaac Ward Dec 5
Sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep,
I sincerely doubt I can,
Coffee, more coffee.
Kat Dec 4
the house is silent
the pitter patter of feet
seem so loud in this abyss
but i run
the shadow men lurk
around every crevice
waiting
to ****** a soul
who's clock kept ticking
to an unholy hour of midnight
it's my clock
it kept ticking as my heartbeat
yelled at the movement i was doing
the hours washing away
the safety of the light
for its nightmare realm
filled with creatures of the unimaginable thought
to those who seek refuge in sleep
11-12-18
Florence Dec 2
Tick, tick,
Down, down,
the watch beeps
On the hour,
Every hour,
I always hear it,
I go to bed at nine,
And can hear it counting,
Ten,
Eleven,Twelve
One,
Two,
ThreeFourFive
Now I have to wake up in an hour and a half,
I didn’t sleep,
Should I have done something instead?
Maybe done that essay,
Or finished those slides,
I have so much work to do
But I’m stuck inside
My own head, filled with
This fog of exhaustion
And confusion,
Why can’t I just
Fall
        A
               s
                     l
                               e              
                                           e
                                                               p
Instead of
Purgatory in my bed,
But I’m so dreading the upcoming ****
There’s a part of me that
Wants to stay awake,
Live through the hours
Because I’m not skipping ahead
Like a game, I don’t
Skip the night
Since there are things to do, right?
But I’m not even doing anything
Useless pictures fill my head,
Impossible to put into words,
Fantasies of a history
That never was,
A future that never will be
A creature, almost human,
Glowing with a white light,
With a voice that echoes,
Electronic and demonic
Keeping me awake,
My ***, why can’t I dream properly,
In half-remembered fragments
Like my living nightmares
All seem to be...

Turning the alarm off at 6:30,
I realise I haven’t slept at all
I groan and roll over
Then get up.
We have work to do.
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