The yellow ball soars through the air
From whence it came I do not care
And with a great, tremendous whack
I send it soaring, soaring back

15 to love, still able to win,
gotta tough it out,
winning is everything. Losing's a sin.
I'll keep trying. I'm still in with a shout.

My backhand slices
the ball to my foe
(Joe's my friend but in a crisis,
I shift where the winds blow)

He parries, sends the ball to the line,
his touch is immaculate,
cleaner than mine.
I leap like a cat

return it with ease
he flicks it back over the net
intending to tease.
I grimace. We made a bet

and now I engage
into higher gear,
my brain fills with rage,
my heart fills with fear.

Advantage to me,
the crowd stands to cheer,
Joe falls to one knee,
buckled, losing a tear.

I volley. It whizzers
past his frozen form
he tries, but misses,
defeated, forelorn.

At last I have won,
the gold cup is mine,
another dream spun,
back to the factory line.

Honestly

Cupid can go **** himself
Doesn't he know that arrows are for killing?
Does he even have a hunting license?

What was he thinking
When he shot
This hole
In my heart?

Was he trying to make me bleed out?

Wednesday, 14th of February 2018, 7.00pm,
" breaking news, a mass-shooting happened today in Florida, American authorities are calling this the worst school shooting in U.S.A's history "
6 minutes and 20 seconds,
That's all it took,
17 confirmed dead,
15 injured,
Countless more lives ruined,
All in under 10 minutes,
No parent should ever have to hug their child,
So tight,
Just because it might be the last time they'll ever say goodbye,
No kid should ever have to be afraid of their school hallway,
Or be afraid of who's standing in the classroom doorway,
No kid should ever wonder if this day will be their last,
And no parent should ever have to bury their kid,
Six feet out of their reach,
So this is for Scott,
And for Alyssa,
For Martin,
And for Nicholas,
Not forgetting Aaron,
This goes to Chris,
And Luke,
For Cara,
And for Gina,
Joaquin and Alaina,
Meadow, Helena, and Alex,
Carmen and Peter,
You are all in our hearts,
Let's face it,
The Floridian community of Douglas,
Will never go back to " normal "
So, Washington? Trump?
Riddle us this?
When is this going to be added to your list of " proud American traditions "?
There are too many heavy hearts,
Too many dark days,
Too much chaos and confusion,
For this to be swept under the carpet again,
Just like the last time,
We aren't even a quarter of the way into 2018,
Yet there has been over 30 mass-shootings since the beginning of January,
So here's to the people who aren't accepting the truth,
Who are too " confused " to realize what's going on,
For the people who haven't woken up to the fact,
That there were unidentified bodies,
Sitting cold in that school for over 24-hours,
And do not tell me I am too young to know what I'm talking to you about,
I stand alongside Emma Gonzalez, and the hundreds of young people across the globe,
This isn't just for our lives,
This is for everyone's lives,
Since when did " don't shoot nice people " become such a controversial statement?
Since when did school safety become a debatable, two-sided matter?
So I will join my fellow marchers,
And yell loudly and unapologetically,
Until they hear our voices,
In the words of Emma Gonzalez,
Adults like it when we have strong test scores,
But not when we have strong opinions,
We are Marching For Our Lives,
And this is our legacy.

what is a man-made education
getting a job,
not working in your field,
as that degree, hangs dusty on the wall, yet
we passed the class,
we made the grades,
we're smart, yet we keep ******* up...
you know it, I know it,
we all know it.

the number you wanted
you got it
so just smile and be thankful
you thought it would make you happy
but you find yourself striving even harder still
towards
more or less

If a forever with you
is what heaven feels like

I'd be more than willing
to take my own life

I don't feel the want, to talk too much
her touch and eyes say more
every stroke, tender kiss
reaches, to my core

A subtle caress of motion
an embrace of words, pure art
statuary built from scratch
moving in my mind, and heart

So don't stop, or pause
on the path, of silent need
hand in hand, we'll wander on
and on each other, feed

She was the devil if the devil's curse was lust
He was  a worshiper, her body his altar
They represented disdain through all who knew them
But she was a drug and He was addicted

You can always tell the Devil's cheating halo,
It's the color never seen within a rainbow.
You can always tell the Devil's cheating halo,
It's the dark one. It's the color of sin.

Color, one word, thousands of references
It is an illusion, science perhaps may explain it
But people have utterly transformed its definition over the past decades
Is it pride? Is it wealth you carry within you once you are born precious yet so fragile?

Define it for me
Release the inner load of prejudiced assumptions
Passed down from generation to generation
Do not be afraid to speak your mind
For you are enlightening me
Go on, define it for me

Red, orange, blue and green
Purple, pink, white and colors we've already seen
Came in touch with, and accepted for what they seem
Whom we do not hesitate adoring, whilst waiting for what more of them there is to see

Colors, beautiful bundles of joy
Billions of them undiscovered
Yet willing to view
And yet unwilling to embrace one another solely because our skin tone is a shade darker, or a shade lighter?

I'm sorry, I thought we loved the thought of not having to unlock our gates to gardens full of plain, dark pigmented red roses
There's got to be the lighter pigmented ones and the yet to blossom ones
The ones that are yet to be labeled
By humanity's impaired vision

I speak
in black and
white —

I think
in color.

I am studying.
I am dying from exams.
I should get some sleep.



Don's you just love exams?
I don't.
I hate it.

Dear God of Study,
I put my brain in your hands
Help me pass all my exams!

I'll be good all year round,
help my GPA from crashing on the ground.

All I need is a curvy C,
because that's what'll get me my degree.

Help.

They said
Don’t wear leggings
Or a shirt that shows your cleavage
Because you need to be covered up
You’re a distraction

They said
Don’t use your period as an excuse
For male teachers to let you go to the bathroom
Because you’re not fooling anybody

They said
Don’t shave your head
Boys can
You can’t and don’t
And won’t because we’ll suspend you

They said
Watch the length of your skirt
The color of your hair
The shoes and makeup
The piercings
And they call that fair

They said
Come to us if something is wrong
if you’re feeling bullied
if you feel unsafe
I guess they don’t remember asking my friend and I
if we heard of anyone in our year with suicidal tendencies
They asked us because
We were the sensible ones
The bright ones
We couldn't have been depressed.
I guess they didn’t see my panic
and my hand squeezing my wrist.


Because school
Is not a place
Where you can express who you are
School is not the place where you feel safe
It's a battleground on the outside of your comfort zone.

School isn’t about education
Its a challenge, competition
Its a measurement of your capabilities  

But what if you don't excel?
You’re called out for not being good enough
You're humiliated. Mocked.

You get looked down on
Judged
Embarrassed
And you don’t get your
Degree

As if a degree explains who you are
What you’ve been through
How much you’re worth

As if a degree
Measures the capacity
Of your heart
And your knowledge

And a teacher can share your grade
Make a joke and smirk
Cause they think you’re not worth it

And they can laugh and yell and call your parents
Who don’t think you’re any better.

Because year after year they’ve been led to believe
that you’re easily distracted
that you don’t do what you’re told
that you’re rebellious

Because even if you showed respect to the hypocrisy
That you can't help but notice,
They still won’t understand that you're just fighting
for what you believe is right, for mutual respect.

Because that’s not what you were thought.
You were thought to raise your hand when you want to speak.
And even if you made a valid point
You would still get lectured on putting your hand up when you want to speak.
Discipline put first.

**And that is my definition of school

Stress.

























































­
































































­




































Oh, and education, I guess.

there's no white
black and so on
God gave us eyes
to see, yet we're
blinded, even with
that degree.

There is a vision of the world in a better place
But it left in the dark cause other don't see it being the same way.

People turn to the wrongs of the world
And, not the more important things,
People are talking ******* and meaningless words
Because we are unable to love each other.

We refuse to listen to better information instead hear a stupid
And useless thing and write words that voices should never share.
This vision is being bypassed and ignored

When it's trying to reach out to us but it is left in the darkness.
We turn to the poisonous lights
Instead of seeing the warning it holds
We keep going towards it

It's the time to listen to our own heartbeat
To talk to our inner self.
It's the introspective moment that we need,
To survive in this modern over-noisy World.

Silence has a sound which can't be heard from the ears,
But only by the heart

Monday
Oh how I dread you
Can you just go away for one more day

Tuesday
You could be anything or nothing at all
You're just Tuesday

Wednesday
**** DAY
I finally get to look forward to the weekend

Thursday
The day before Friday
Anything could happen, but it wouldn't count

Friday
The most annoying day because of Rebecca Black
But it means we have 2 days of no *******

Saturday
Thank you for no school
But sadly you go by too fast

Sunday
Ruined because you know tomorrow is Monday
The one day I remember to do my homework

Living life but is hiding,

Waking up but you feel like dying,

Wishing you could fly but falling.

Feeling like the world is crashing down,

You take one breath in and breathe out slowly.

Stepping in the light you go,

Facing reality very slow.

Watching time flash before your eyes,

You see the truth deep inside.

Your world turns out to be the game of life,

Facing it makes you wanna die.

Feeling reality's pain and pleasure,

Yet so strong but very clever.

Embracing it with all your might,

Trying not to give up the fight.

Taking responsibility for your lies and actions,

Seeing the mistakes you made in fractions.

You take one breath in and breathe out slowly,

You step back out of the light that's holy.

Facing reality is what you struggle to do,

But somehow you made halfway through.

Green.
Like a field or a forest,
That color I deeply desire.

Blue.
Like the heart of the ocean,
The color I could get lost in forever.

But when you change from green,
To blue,
And back to green,
Then mix them,
It's like heaven.
Like all the stars have combined,
Into two beautiful eyes

Those eyes are yours
And I will drown in them forever

His eyes were blue.
You could stare at them for hours and see a rainbow of colors swirling within.
His eyes were mesmerizing; getting lost in them was far too easy.
You could see the ocean in his eyes, the way they shine just like the water does as the sun sets.
You want to jump into the sea of his eyes and see the world from his point of view.
If you look into those blue eyes you’ll see a whole new world, one so beautiful and magical you never want to leave.
So you never look into them, to begin with.
All you see is that his eyes are blue, for if you look any deeper you will drown.

I never cared for blue eyes.
a simple, dull tone of boring pens
and pale skies and puddles.                    
a common color among a million eyes.

until yours.      
then pools of shining ink spreading across plain pages,
filling chapters of my life.
a bright summer horizon expanding before me,
everywhere eyes can see.            
a huge, infinite ocean of sparkling blue,                      
blue that fills my eyes and mind and lungs,              
voluntarily drowning in your color.

Your Beautiful Blue Eyes Never Lie

My knight does not need to be
in shining armor,
nor blessed with prestige
or countless honor.

It only needs to be you,
someone who could wield
a sword, respectable enough
to be able to strike a heart of gold.

Love's, but a *** of fool’s gold
It has you captivated and excited about finding something valuable, then you wake up, and find that it's but just a fake. It can stab you in the back and hurt worse than a stake. Love is, but a *** of fool’s gold you may find and behold. But remember it's just a *** of fool’s gold.

I live in a World of Fantasy,
So keep your reality away from me,
I see what I want,
I want what I see,
And that is all okay by me.

The light is shining
We're on display
The whistle blows
Nothing's moving
The air is still
Everyone yells
PA
4 beats of silence
And then it starts
The colors spin
The laughing begins
Then you toss
You hold your breath
As the colors fly through the sun
Everything stills
The light pours through you, you are endless
You catch
4 beats have gone by
Since the silence ended
4 beats is a lifetime

The flags interweave in a synchronous pace.
A pattern is formed and dissolves into space.

Kaleidoscope movement and the swish of a sabre.
What flows like dance is a pain and hard labor.

Glitter and make-up fluff and curls for the show.
But there's nothing soft about the rifles they throw.

The best part of the guard is not seen by the eye.
It's teamwork and sharing and daring to try.

When the show's over and the props put away.
There's always more practice and some time to play.

So just when you think the guard is all done.
Somewhere in a gym, they're still having fun.

below the others
   the nothing else said
matters;
but what it takes,
   doesn't take matter,
and is inseparable.

As you can see,
I've never been a prodigy.
Always unimpressive, apparently.
Stressing is an everyday thing.
But you wouldn't care,
You're just so unaware.
Depression has me ensnared,
But you couldn't handle my despair.
So keep your eyes closed.
And I'll do the same.
The things I think about are completely insane,
I wish the good times would never change.
But this isn't my dreamland.
It's a place where I don't want to stand.
Depression is the ocean,
Anxiety is the sand,
And I'm somewhere floating in between it all.

I did it again.
That gun went to my head again.
My arms are bleeding again.
I'm crying again

Is there a point where tears dry up?
I haven't found it.

I did it again
I wrote my suicide note again
I took medicine again
I wish for death again

Why can't I do anything right?
I can't even die properly

I did it again
I pulled the trigger again
Nothing happened again
I say I'm sorry again

Maybe I'll die this time.
Or maybe I won't again.

In the cold, dark
        of January,
         I remembered
              you
        the most.
  As the chill
      snapped bones
              like branches,
     as the afternoons
   bathed themselves
in gray,
     as the birds
and the backs
      shook,
so did my lips
   around your name.
I'm so happy
     January is almost
over now.

Been a week since the new year arrived at dawn's door
Seven sunrises had passed making way for many more
Resolutions, wishes, aspirations cast into winds of new days
In hopes they'd be carried forth on each dawn's new rays

Let us welcome the fresh air that come
Inhale it deep as reminder that we're luckier than some
Let us embrace the opportunity of time
A privilege bestowed so we could still pen in rhyme

Let us cherish the love from family and new found friends
Shower upon them the gift of verse that never ends
Let us strengthen existing virtual and physical connections
Reinforce them with kindness, fortitude and good intentions

Let us sieve past experiences that mar us black
Dispense with animosity, ill thoughts and considerations that lack
Let us trudge forward into the unknown together
Hands in hands and hearts to hearts into the unforeseeable future

No matter who you are or where you've been
We'll all get our fair share of twenty fifteen
We've all been granted if you'd only take advantage
In the great book of life, on a fresh, brand new page

Do note that this is just ideal advice not so much as a plea
I know the journey is long, arduous and never easy
I hope these words I've penned would lighten your load
Little bites of wisdom (I hope) for the long meandering road

I can't promise the rise of the nightly moon
But the sun will rise where you are; and it will arrive very soon
This is me being optimistic. I don't wear this garb for too long at a time

Sorry losers and haters but my IQ is one of the highest
Somehow I dont quite believe that but I am pretty biased
See I think you're a ***** Donald Trump I really do
Because what intelligent person would think the following is true
Muslims should be denied entry into the great United States
Surley by doing this you will go down in history as one of the greats?
Or by telling transgenders they can't serve in the forces
And doctors should be punished by administering abortions
How's that great big wall of yours currently going?
Have the Mexicans offered to pay for it or are you still not knowing?
Now I have to say I think your face is one big publicity stunt
So I'm just going to go ahead and be brutally blunt
Donald Trump I think your a

Historic day for the world today
As Trump and Kim sign away

Nobel Peace prize guaranteed for Trump
As North Korea will rise out of their sanctions slump

Nuclear disarmament surely on its way
But to me it just feels like I'm watching a screenplay

Dennis Rodman a friend of both
A great sportsman but a bit of an oath

But what if it was all a total farce
Trump phoned Kim said test those nukes and make things worse

I'll then scream and shout and call you names
Don't worry if internet is full of our memes

The world will sanction you it'll look really bad
It'll be ok mate soon we'll both be glad

We'll both back down and agree to meet
I'll sort it out and send you a tweet

Then in Singapore we'll sit down together
And people will talk about us more then the weather

Without the charade it would have never been allowed
We'll do it in front of a nice big crowd

North Korea will surely come out of poverty
And the world will avoid our prefabricated atrocity

Is the world now a safer place
I'm still not convinced for the human race

Your elegent voice
Soft and subtle
Can't be missed
In this chair
Looking at you
In that bed
Stay with me
Just another minute
We were 17
Chocolate for soldiers
Covers for tables
Flower for you
Glass Coca cola
Movie playing
Back of my Chevy
Staring at stars
Sky in your eyes
Going steady
Meeting your parents
No computers
Strongest connection
You're my password
Watching and waiting
Course of history
Making our own
We made plenty
Kids having kids
Years to decades
75 and still
Laying beside me
Gave a promise
We were 17
You accepted
Imperfect
But I kept it
Here's another
Sitting, this chair
You, that bed
Not our chair
Not our bed
Smell of Iodoform
And wilted flowers
Yet still
Your elegant whisper
Cant be missed
But I promise this
You will be
Never forgetting
We were 17

Just another minute

Ocean singing
Water and sand
Crashing, commanding
Standing Attention
Beside you,
Never close enough
Fly with me
Back home, before
The history
Rations for bravery
You for you
Proper pop
Screen dances
Frozen eyes
Only Star I see
See the beginning
Butterflies in sync
Inks drying
Pens and letters
Melt together
Moons and suns
Here and there
Decadence and
Debauchery
We did our
Own thing
Planting gardens
Self watering
In our chest
Of treasure
3 quarters
Of century
Gave me
That star
Not always bright
Never falling
Leaves now
To illuminate
Another planet
But I'll see it
Everytime I
Close my eyes
Remembering
We were 17

Facebook gave us a new look
Addicted to reading people's lives
Forgetting that we have ours to problematize

Messenger connected us to strangers
Being indulged in chatting with them
Dis-remembering those people,
People that are not virtual,
People that you have to catch up to

Twitter lets it all out,
Our problems, our thoughts, our whines, our woes
But while using twitter, you overlooked those around you
Those who're willing to listen to you
Those who can actually help you

Instagram lets us share photos with our loved ones
Photos where everyone looked delighted and felicitous
Photos that are pretentious
Only on photos do they seem happy
But in real life, they're constantly neglecting,
Neglecting and taking each other for granted

Why do we let social media measure our worth?
Is it really worthy?
Is it really that worthy to be connected to those who are far from you,
While sacrificing those people you love who are near you?

Social media companies
Swear it's you they want to please
They badly want for you to see
That they value privacy
And that there are several strictures
On who can see your posts and pictures.

You think your profile is secure
You're satisfied until you hear
That they sell your information
To advertising corporations.

Every post that you've spent time on
pictures, videos you had your eye on
They save it all for using later
And say "It's ONLY metadata!"

They as good as have a list
Of content that you can't resist
And knowing full well what you like
With custom ads they duly strike!
They desperately want you to keep scrolling
So they can see the money roll in.
And their ethics will be forfeited
So advertisers can be profited.

You've been offline for 16 minutes
I could have said it, but I didn't
I had it written, but I didn't send it
I'm kind of a coward, I'll admit it.

I couldn't fit it in a space that I thought you would read
I had a tendency to ramble when you listened
or pretended, and in the poems that you've never seen
it's just as bad,
I go careening through a bending path of bramble
tryna scramble to the point
but I lost you
neck deep in the prose that arose
around a metaphor packed to the brim
with condescending tid bits
where I use your words against you
but a heavy weight that sits
over it all, when I lost the only friend I can talk to

so let me spend the next half hour
showering over you
another lesson in epistemology
honestly I don't know how you could be
so dim to miss what I've put in to this

Do you not see how wrong you are

Does it bother you
To have every miss step
pounced on and deconstructed
I was talking down
just to knock it through your thick head
but I guess I ****** it
I'll just have to say it angrier now

Let me spend the next two months convincing you
whatever you had seen in me was through a lens
I didn't deserve to be seen through
All it took was losing you to see
I'm exactly where I should have ended up

I know that no apology
will unwind the web I spun. the web I sit on now
to watch what I've undone with my own hands.
Hands that even now subside in fear
of what I'd hear then in your voice
when you reply
to let it die

So I'll let it die
I'm sorry