She put her trust in you
But, you have sadly let her down
Always there and one who cared
Now all of the joy has turned into frowns
How could you treat her that way
She was once your queen
Drowning in tears of grief and sorrow
Nothing but a chaotic scene

Her

I still get nervous when you walk in the room
I still get butterflies when I sit next to you
I'm in love with you

How do you take the heartache away?
How do you cease its existence?

Well,
Let me tell you how I do it;

I inflict pain,
A scarring one, that is;

All in hopes that
the pain would take
the heartache away;

But only for me to find out
that the deepest scars
doesn't always cause
the deepest pain;

And that the deepest pain
doesn't always leave scars.

So tell me, how do you do it?
How do you take the heartache away?
How do you cease its existence?

But please,
Please don't hurt yourself;
Don't do it like I do.

I hate to admit that,
Even if I hate you right now,
To the degree that spells out,
"So much,"
I can't deny that,
I am still,
Inevitably still,
In love with,
You.

to the one that got away

No matter how much I explain my self, be quiet, speak the truth, say how I feel, and just be me; boldly speaking of how the stars and the sun will eventually fall in love, I am always misunderstood. I created a strom from the emotions hidden inside and they ask "how could you create a storm when the sky smiled on this lovely day. I think you need to change because everything you do is not good or good enough. You're just doing to much. Shut your  mouth, you're too loud. silence why are you quite today is something wrong?  answer me! I'm talking to you!" I say I'm crying the storm because I buried too much pain and I'm quite today because the sky was smiling on this lovely (awful) day. But I guess you don't really care since you always misunderstand my pain

Angel 7d

I was falling for you faster than I ever had before,
You tore my walls down ,
by being yourself,
your embrace was my castle,
And you were the guard,
I blindly trusted you to protect what matters most to me,
you see ,
I guess we were not meant to be,
but what to I do with this half finished symphony,
I tattooed onto my heart,
your memory haunts me,
on the basement couch,
where you heard my thoughts in silence,
and held me as i cried,
after you discovered one of my demons,
In the campfire smoke,
that stings my eyes,
the same way the tears do  ,
You haunt me in the constellations,
I feel you as i sit amongst the grass,
we used to lay upon the grass,
tangled in blankets,
and the warmth of the other,
we used to talk,
we never did stop,
until you let worry silence you,
I don’t let what i can not control have power over my voice,  
I wonder what your doing,
I went from ridding shot gun,
to driving three cars behind,
you placed me in your blind spot,
now all I get are snapshots,
on Snapchat and Instagram,  
I’m left wondering who I am to you,
I hope I’m not just “some girl I knew”

Benji James Jun 17

Skimming stones across the water

All these memories flash before my eyes

Things were good back then.
Now you get under my skin.
Once upon a time you were my everything
all of this has changed 

You and I 
we went our separate ways
now all that I can do

is reminisce about better days
you’re lingering here in dreams
still envision you, standing in front of me
Maybe this will all fade with time
but right now babe,
you’re still here in my mind

Here I am counting all the ways

we let each other down,

how did you just stand there,
you just let me drown,
in all of this pain.
Just sitting in this park, after dark

gazing at all these stars
how could we drift this far apart?
like a river rises,
 I’m flooded with emotions
For you, I was totally devoted
how could you give up on me
When I needed you most
All is lost, my heart is crushed
I lost you in this love

Hey girl, once there was a time

All I wanted was you to be mine,

All of the jealousy in me
Lead me to places, I never thought I would see
It made me become, everything I said I’d never be
I am looking for all the signals 
that lead us to this,

How was this something we couldn’t fix

Wasn’t me who chose it, to be this way.
How could you go lead me astray
Seems you sucked the light right out of me
and all these emotions, I can’t control
all of this hurt, Don’t wanna feel anymore
Make me numb, I don’t want to feel anymore.

Here I am counting all the ways

we let each other down,

how did you just stand there,
you just let me drown,
in all of this pain.
Just sitting in this park, after dark

gazing at all these stars
how could we drift this far apart?
like a river rises, 
I’m flooded with emotions
For you, I was totally devoted
how could you give up on me
When I needed you most
All is lost, my heart is crushed
I lost you in this love

Standing on this ledge

looking over a vast ocean

I could jump at any moment
So I can drown in this emotional ocean

Let the salt sting all these wounds 
that you left upon me
all these scars reveal, the pain you left me in
Can you see it, see this is what you did
Thought we were the perfect two
only to be heartbroken by you
How could an angel, cause this kind of hurt
How could someone I trusted so much
tear me completely apart, shattered and broken

Words that never should have been spoken
Were revealed in conversation

I need to escape this vindication
baby, I’m lost in this confrontation
need my own constellation
just to escape this situation

Here I am counting all the ways

we let each other down,

how did you just stand there,
you just let me drown,
in all of this pain.
Just sitting in this park, after dark

gazing at all these stars
how could we drift this far apart?
like a river rises, 
I’m flooded with emotions
For you, I was totally devoted
how could you give up on me
When I needed you most
All is lost, my heart is crushed
I lost you in this love

©2017 Written By Benji James

Shrivastva MK Jun 16

Pyar kiya to nibhaya karo,
Deke dard judai ka na mujhe yu tadpaya karo,
Na lo meri mohabbat ka imtehaan,
Kya kami rah gai meri mohabbat me ye to btaya karo,

Sath na dena ho yadi to sapne na dikhaya karo,
Jana ho dur hi agar to kisi ke zindagi me na yu aaya karo,
Kar ke wada sath nibhane ka,
Mujhe yu akela na chhod jaya karo,

Ae pal ab tum hi es jawane ko samjhaya karo,
Kisi bhi ajanabi ko yu na dil me basaya karo,
Najane kitne aashiq jale honge kisi Ki mohabbat me,
Ai khuda aashiqo ko yu kisi ke mohabbat me na jalaya karo,
Na tadpaya karo.....

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