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I cannot express how wonderful it feels
For the first time in so long
I sit down to write a poem
In which your name does not belong

Finally
Somebody else
Drifts in and out of my thoughts each day
I didn't know it was possible
Although your face is still here to stay

I don't even remember what it is like
To daydream of someone other than you
You've occupied my brain so many years
It feels strange to make room for him too

I wish he could replace you
Instead of only serve as a distraction
Though to him I am drawn
For you doesn't waver my attraction

It seems no feelings will ever be strong enough
To stomp out the ones you left in my heart
But that I have them for anyone else in the first place
In and of itself is a pretty good start

Before I couldn't even look at another
Without my stomach turning sick
Now I am hanging out with someone new
Used my Polaroid camera to take a pic

You may have moved on faster
But I am slowly losing the fear
That I will never fall in love again
Though it'll never be like when you were here

I have accepted I will never be as happy again
As I was when I was with you
But I don't need to duplicate those emotions
Not-quite-as-happy will certainly do

I admit that the first time he kissed me
"He's not as good as you"
Repeated in my head
But now I realize that you are not better
I was just craving familiar instead

After spending so much of our lives together
I don't know how to be with anyone else
But I know comparing everything
To the past can't possibly help

I understand you could never be replaced
Unconditional love for you I hold in my soul
I am not searching for my new soulmate
Finding someone who makes me smile is my goal

There may never come a day
Where he has as much of me as you
But I don't need him to travel to my depths
Only to give me an equal piece too

You never let your walls down for me
Though I bared my most vulnerable parts inside
I don't care if he tells me all his secrets
As long as he shows some sections he hides

And is willing to chisel away the armor
Your mistakes have left around my skin
I don't expect him to understand me
But you wouldn't even begin

So many memories we've shared
Things we've done
Places we went
Now I have to start all over
But that time was still well spent

I don't think he will ever coax out
The level of ecstasy you did with your fingers
But his hands give me butterflies
And a chill that lingers

When you walked out the door you took my hope
Left me with an inability to feel
But it has returned along with the sense
Wounds you inflicted will someday heal

If I am patient in the future I'll awaken
With his name on my mind first
And find comfort knowing that even if he breaks my heart
You've already put me through the worst
This poem is pretty ironic but hey small steps
I want to gather us all up
I want us to break all the glasses
All the glasses on the floor
Throw them down shattered and mixed  
And when you return you’ll walk in
You say what’s all this
I’ll point
I’ll say see that that’s my heart
Which part belongs to you’ll say
And I
I will just walk away
Deep 4d
Heartbroken, sick and sad, and sleepless
I touch the nib of my pen on this white paper
Hoping to write timeless poetry from
the perfect ingredients which I sought
In my loveless days,

Yet, I struggle to pen down
the thoughts,

O, my Muse! the dispenser of my woes

Have I offended you by breaking vows?

I implore you to return my solitary days
This feeling is unbearable,

Heavy,

And mind-numbing,

Now, I know what I utmost desired
was poison,

It's nothing like the film, books, shows, and other
audio-visuals,

But like, someone has punctured the knife in the palm
and slowly taking it towards the shoulders
and to the whole body.
You ran away before I got a chance to say it to you.

You hid when I tried to show it to you.

You shouted when I tried to whisper it to you.

You let it fall when I tried to give it to you.

You left me in the dark when I tried to reach for your light.

You said that I lied when I tried to get you to hear the truth,

So I don't know what I should do

Because I still love you?

You became my only source of peace in this war;

Something Heavenly while I rot inside this Hell.

For like I said, I still love you;

But the question is, do you still love this man------this Fool?.........
I did not treat you the greatest,
But you did not treat me right too.
And since we heartbreakingly departed,
In other men, I am searching for you.
You were my first real love,
I adored you so incredibly much.
But now you forever hate me,
And I've forgotten your touch.
We will never again meet,
Our love is in the past.
Though, there was a time when
We thought it would surely last.
After you left me broken,
On Valentine's Day,
I fell into a dangerous spiral.
And lost myself along the way.
I have seen eight since our love fell,
In roughly three hundred days.
And in that time frame,
I thought I had parted ways.
But it seems you still cross my mind,
And I will sometimes check up on you.
I guess what I'm saying is that sometimes
I miss the old love we'd once had too.
But might I add as well; listen to my voice.
In every situation, I was always his last choice.
People that had bullied me, he cared for more.
To this boy, standing up for me was a chore.
He cared more for himself than for me,
He cared about his image, so much more.
And when he told me he never loved me,
I fell down, heart in agony, tears on the floor.
He tried leaving, I didn't want him to go.
And so, I tried hurting myself in front of him,
All as a means of telling him no.
It worked, he stayed a little as he did care,
Although it was not in the way I wanted;
And with you, I will now share.
Valentine's Day, he said he never loved me,
After nine months, he expressed the kind of love.
It was not the love I had; the unconditional kind.
And it was not the other either, from up above.
It was the sort of love that had him blind.
What I'm saying is that he felt nothing but lust.
His feelings for me had faded away;
And that is why I ended it that day.
I told him, if you walk out the door, we are done.
Oh my, you should have seen him run.
And left alone, I screamed.
You would have thought I'd been stabbed!
To my chest, my hand held and grabbed.
My heart was exploding, love flying away.
I screamed out, but I wouldn't see him today.  
Or ever again.
And now I keep trying to find you,
Somehow, in other men.
Lucas 6d
today is my best friend's birthday
and actually i didn't even come here to see her

i was just thinking about when we would ever meet again...

and maybe, i only threw this party for you

apparently, you didn't even like the presents
/////

lovers are on the couch,
while we are still wild and free and we fly like two butterflies in the salty air

but somehow, it seems like they got lost in space and time

also lost their original colors and recovered themselves in dark aspects and they don't even recognize each other anymore

oh God, i swear i've never seen a blue like yours before
and by that i mean you’re colder than never

the approach of our hands - glasses of whiskey break on the floor -

hold me tight and don't let me get through the door,
cause i'm on fire and i need your ice arms again

would you melt if i kissed you?

my body is under an explosion of countless feelings

it is possible to hear sounds of pain and desire
and i kinda wished you to take me to that ***** bed

but although the air is salty, it still rests under our silence

we spent a long time without talking
and now i want to be closer to you
talk about everything
but how could i do it when "everything" means - you?

you gave me some alcohol drinks in your mouth
i don't even like to drink and i'm not used to get drunk

the funny thing is that that liquor had a reverse effect,
because no other poison would **** me as brutally as your love does.
Skylar Feb 22
We were in love
We always will be,
You showed me how to love,
I'll never love another,
I don't have anymore love left,
I'll never fall inlove,
Again.
LAICEY Feb 16
Sunlight crept in through the
slits in your blinds,
two bodies intertwined
at 11:30am accompanied by
two glasses of red wine
(quarter full) on your bedside
table, above which your picture
perfectly hangs and aligns with
the painting you finished last night.
Last night. Sigh
I was yours and you mine,
traced my finger along your hairline
while your head rested between my thighs.

But somewhere between our highs
we broke paradigm.
I wish god had given us a sign
that we would have a last time.
© LAICEY Poems February 2021
Paras Bajaj Feb 14
Only if you knew
how much I
torture myself
to be with you
“just as a friend.”
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