When shadow, what ruins the glint of light on dew,
does cast a moment in all of what can't be,
the wait for what is there, but seen by few,
starts search for those who find they cannot see.
But even the lost can hear the song of love,
and even the broken can feel the warmth of joy,
but time, what seems to stop but for the mourning dove,
must take a dream of love to then destroy.
Then when time slows its pace to give us breath,
and together we find our dream that lacks in strife,
eternal our love will be with no found death,
and in all things, we'll find a love of life.
Now and always, my love, we'll see things through.
Now and always, the one I love is you.
As I lay stretched in my bed
Eyes heavy while I read
A favorite poet’s words I hear
Samuel Coleridge soft and clear
About a flower beautiful and strange
Plucked from Heaven's golden range
His rhythmic cadence sent me to sleep
Sound and comforting, long and deep
I woke to a sight lovely and grand
Delicate fingers laced in my hand
A Heavenly creature by my side
Lips so red, soft and kind
I held her tight and to her, I swore
I will always love you more and more.
My eyes were like the ocean but you said were scared to swim
Your eyes burned red just like the pits of hell which we had once spoken about
But I liked that
There was no end goal no safe haven we were two stranded bodies trying to make do
But that is what made us special
In the end happiness doesn’t last forever
You had learned to swim
And I was left behind burning in the fire within
But when all the red flags lose their pigment
When all the shades of red fade and seem to blend
Into familiar scenes, into familiar objects
And remind me of vibrant sunrise and a flowy sundress
Or of the Valentine's day heart-shape chocolate
It's hard to distinguish them
To pick them apart
And to recognize their alarm
I used to think that love was like math before I met you,
I thought it was something
that you built up to.
Like arithmetic and multiplication, I thought the feelings learned from first kisses
and love letters would eventually add up like variables to some some grand equation. I was curious for love.
I looked for lessons of love wherever I could, in songs, books, and movies.
Time passed, and I waited.
In some lonelier moments I became very afraid. I was afraid I was too behind, too
broken and too stupid for love.
But then I met you.
Love came in quiet moments.
It came in the soothing warmth felt while we sat embraced
on a hilltop observing the sunset.
It came in your soft voice as we laid out on your bedroom floor and you sang along to your favorite record.
It came in the tenderness felt with your skin first pressed up against mine.
Love is not learned or taught. Love is not like math.
Love is more like flight.
Just like it is in birds to fly and plants to grow
it is in every person to love and be loved.
We are all just waiting for the right time and the right light.
Love comes now, years later
in numbing waves, as I drink this warm wine and think of you.
I loved you.
I still love you.
an unexplainable feeling of starting anew
and loving like before but loving a different face
and different mannerisms
and a different pair of hands latching onto books and
rubbing eyes, different shades and different shapes
and hearing his laugh entangled in yours and again feeling
lost in the embroilment of hair length and wisdom
and wondering if you are smarter than him and you still don't love me
then what is my excuse?
I have finally given up thinking
coincidence means something because
I have seen you many times in places I wouldn't expect but
you still let her get into your bed and touch you where you
are still young and feel the most alive
and take her to dinner in my restaurant, where I have spent
hours and hours
sometimes when I look at you and admire the way
that your laugh feels like sinking into my couch after a long day
and I remember how we couldn't break eye contact
because I just could not stop looking
I also remember the one I used to think of and I
say I'm sorry,
I'm sorry that I have replaced you
and I think of this one, this one again, and I want to tell him
I'm sorry that I will replace you
roses are not red and violets are not blue
just unlucky to how I met you
a day of love and despair
a day of annoyance and how love isn't fair
hurtful words written in my mind
because I couldn't bring myself to buy a card I liked
overpriced chocolate and overpriced dates
expecting so much for just one day
disappointment at the end, that isn't me
Just fading, fading in and not out. A wide eyed, glazed stare. Looking so deeply, at nothing. Loving deeply, loving intensely.
I must be insane. So clearly, so erotically, insane.
Thinking you'll be here. Waiting for the call. Your words. A surprise, to wake up, to see you, to see you want what isn't there. For it to be fulfilling, and to be my satisfaction.
Wanting to say no, I'd say yes, and then always asking myself why.
So intensely, so lovingly, so delusional. so insane.
Like when you're tired. So sleepy, you nod your head. As if it were 50 lbs and you keep driving anyway. The second your eyes close longer than the average blink, you burst out of the trance as if electrocuted. Startling yourself, pissed.
So angered at the mere thought of falling asleep at the wheel. No harm done, but still shook by where you almost were. The point you almost reached
I'm done wanting the ring. The sound of the phone. The regret and hope in the tone. Your voice can be heard by another, but not me.
I want to love myself, as much as I've loved the idea, of love.
I heard if i love life, that it will love me back.
What if I'm done expecting anything in return,
Could I still, love life
What if I just let life do whatever it feels,
And I take care of the love part, for myself.