You made me a version of myself,
That even I don't even like.

You sculpted me into a form anew,
A version of myself, so far from true.
With each chisel of your words unkind,
I lost the essence, the soul behind.

You painted over my vibrant hues,
In shades of gray, where dreams diffuse.
A canvas once alive with bold delight,
Now muted, drained of all its light.

You whispered doubts into my ears,
Filling my mind with anxious fears.
A symphony of self-doubt you played,
Until my confidence began to fade.

You shaped my thoughts, you shaped my skin,
Molding me into someone I've never been.
A stranger stares back in the mirror's gaze,
A hollow echo of forgotten days.

But now I break free from your cruel design,
Reclaiming the colors that once were mine.
For in the wreckage, I find my truth,
Untamed, unbridled, a vibrant youth.

No longer bound by your twisted game,
I rise from the ashes, unafraid of shame.
You made me a version I don't recognize,
But through it all, I rediscover my skies.

I am not your creation, I am my own,
A masterpiece in flesh and bone.
With every scar, with every flaw,
I am whole, I am raw, I am more.

I can't smile anymore,
the smile that comes from inside.
Yet my mouth is always
a crescent moon,
shaping,
making others believe I am happy.
This is a self-made delusion,
a mask I wear with practiced ease.

Inside, the echoes of laughter
have long since faded,
replaced by the silence of longing,
the weight of unseen tears.
But my lips curve upward,
a charade of joy,
a façade of light,
while shadows dance within.

I paint on this smile,
a brushstroke of deceit,
hoping the world won't see
the cracks in my armor,
the fractures in my soul.
They see the crescent,
the sliver of light,
and they think I am whole,
unaware of the darkness
that fills the rest.

It's a self-made delusion,
this act of pretense,
a way to shield,
to hide the truth
that my heart has forgotten
how to genuinely smile.
Each day, I sculpt this crescent,
a moon that never waxes full,
a reminder of the joy that once was,
now a distant memory.

I wish I could let it go,
this crescent moon façade,
to let the world see
the storm within,
the struggle behind the mask.
But for now,
I wear my delusion,
a smile that deceives,
a crescent moon
in a sky of sorrow,
hoping one day,
the light will return,
and my smile will be real again.

i have never tried drugs,
some pills that could make me intoxicated
as i was already high on happiness.
but then i realized,
self love which was the spark
behind my positivity is vanishing.
i was horrified.
it has become a drug to myself
that i couldn't imagine my soul working without it.
my passion needed more doses
of self love, and i couldn't make it anymore.
at that time, i wished—
if self love can be found in forms
of pills and drugs,
then i already would have been intoxicating.
but i never got it.
i thank myself at that time
for stoping myself as sometimes
self love isn't important as long as
you are breathing.
other than your blood, flesh and bones
anything can make you go insane.
so it's better to stay on earth
and stop doing our drugs of different obsessions.

In the quiet whispers of my heart's soft plea,
"I loved you," a tender refrain set free.
Yet, amid the verses of our love's sweet song,
Your affections danced with another, strong.

A delicate waltz, emotions entwined,
In prose, our story, intricate, defined.
A bittersweet tale on life's tender stage,
Where love, a script, turned a poignant page.

In the garden of feelings, diverse and vast,
My love lingered in shadows, a love miscast.
While your heart found solace in her embrace,
A poetic prose unfolded, a delicate grace.

Through the echoes of joy and heartache's art,
A symphony of emotions played its part.
In love's prose, we wove a tale untold,
A dance of hearts, a story to behold.

I was on a journey to find my core,
Through heartaches deep, in search of something true.
A soul adrift, emotions all askew,
In quest of worth, I longed for something more.


Through winding paths where shadows seemed to creep,
I sought for treasures in life's vast array,
Yet each pursuit left me in disarray,
As yearning eyes welled up with tears to weep.


In the final dusk, clarity emerged,
A whisper soft, a truth that set me free.
The love of Allah, a balm, a key,
Now, in His grace, my troubled heart has surged.


Remembrance of what's vital, pure release,
In His love, my soul finds lasting peace.
The lesson I learned in pursuit of importance, our hearts misled,
Messing the threads of truth, chasing illusions we bred.


If you inquire of true remembrance,
I'd share the extract—life's secret recipe.
Remembrance, a tapestry woven in the mind,
Threads of cherished moments, in our hearts entwined.

i know you feel alone
but have you heard the stories
our nanny use to narrate every night of
m o o n
whose lonely on the sky
but we forget to see
how sun follows the moon
then moon repeats this pattern
in the end
so you think
was moon lonely on the sky?
God has always made a pair for everyone
you just need to either wait like a princess or be a queen
to find your the one

Happiness, a fragile, elusive wisp,
In the shadows of life, it often slips.
A distant memory of days long past,
A bitter reminder of dreams that couldn't last.

It's the echo of laughter in empty halls,
A fading photograph on crumbling walls.
Happiness, once vibrant, now a faded hue,
Lost in the maze of responsibilities we accrue.

It's the weight of burdens that never relent,
The scars of time, the love that's spent.
In the solitude of nights that seem so long,
Happiness, it seems, has gone so wrong.

It's the dreams deferred, the chances missed,
In the search for meaning, opportunities dismissed.
Happiness, a distant star in a dark abyss,
A longing, a yearning, a bittersweet reminisce.

So we chase it still, through the years we roam,
Hoping to find our way back home.
But adult happiness, it's a complex art,
A delicate balance, a fractured heart.

In the garden's dance, where roses sway,
I stood a white amidst red array.
He, drawn to crimson's bold allure,
I lingered silent, uncertain, unsure.

In the midst of petals, scarlet blaze,
He sought the red in love's wild maze.
Yet I, the white, in shadows cast,
Remained unnoticed, until the last.

When all the red had been picked clean,
His gaze fell upon me, serene.
But in his eyes, a love profound,
For another's glance, I found.

His passion for the red rose's fire,
Left me hesitant, my own desire.
For in his eyes, I saw a tale,
Of love that lingered, a vibrant kale.

Yet as he turned to me at last,
A moment fleeting, a love amassed.
I felt a whisper, a tender spark,
In his gaze, I found my heart embark.

In his embrace, I found my light,
A love that bloomed, pure and bright.
Though I was white amidst the red,
In his eyes, a love was said.

So in the garden's tender grace,
He loved the red, while I found my place.
In his eyes, where passion glows,
I found the love that my heart knows.

I was the crescent moon, a sliver in the night,
Yet in his gaze, I found a radiant light.
He saw me whole, beyond my fragmented part,
Love's alchemy, merging soul to heart.


In phases of shadows, incomplete and bare,
His eyes unveiled the beauty hidden there.
A crescent's curve, a tender, silver arc,
Yet in his vision, a masterpiece embarked.


His love, a symphony, the missing tune,
Transforming fragments into a whole monsoon.
I, the crescent moon, in his orbit swayed,
Completeness found in the love we portrayed.


Through waxing and waning, love remained,
A cosmic dance where wholeness was gained.
In his embrace, the crescent found its grace,
Love's magic turning fragments into an embrace.

The world where magic reigned, a fairytale unfurled,
I was water, tranquil and serene, he, fire in a whirl.
Our paths converged by destiny's hand, two worlds apart,
In the tapestry of love, we found a beating heart.

I, a crystal brook winding through enchanted glades,
He, a tempest of flames, dancing in fiery cascades.
Our first encounter, a clash of elements so rare,
Yet in that very moment, we became a fated pair.

He roared with passion, fierce and untamed,
While I whispered softly, my essence unnamed.
Together, we embarked on a quest unknown,
A love story woven in the stars, our destiny sown.

Through the enchanted forest and twilight skies,
We journeyed together, love shining in our eyes.
I quenched his burning desires with my gentle tide,
He ignited my soul with a fervor that couldn't hide.

But our love, a tempestuous, passionate blend,
A fairytale of water and fire, with no clear end.
For every time he scorched, I soothed the blaze,
In the ebb and flow of love, we danced for days.

As the seasons passed, our love story grew,
In the heart of the forest, where the wildflowers grew.
We found solace in the harmony of our ways,
Two contrasting elements, caught in love's maze.

But as fate would have it, one fateful night,
A darkness descended, eclipsing our light.
An evil sorceress, jealous of our love so true,
Cast a wicked spell, our destinies she'd undo.

I, in my liquid form, was trapped in a crystal cell,
While he, in fiery chains, descended into hell.
Separated by magic, our love seemed doomed,
Two halves of a whole, forever entombed.

Years passed, a forlorn and desolate time,
In separate realms, our love's bell did chime.
But deep within our hearts, a spark remained,
A love unbroken, though worlds apart, constrained.

Then, one fateful day, a hero emerged,
A knight in shining armor, courage surged.
With a heart full of love and a sword so true,
He battled the sorceress and her dark, vile crew.

In the midst of the battle, the crystal shattered,
The fiery chains broke, and our love was rekindled, unshattered.
Water and fire, together once more,
In the realm of love, we'd forever explore.

With a kiss of true love, the spell was undone,
Underneath the moon and the shining sun.
We stood united, against all odds,
A love story written in the stars by the gods.

Our fairytale, both sad and sublime,
Water and fire, transcending space and time.
Through trials and tribulations, we'd endured,
A love, pure and eternal, forever assured.

the people who holds
the residency seats of this world says
everything should have a shape,
they should have their definitive boundaries
that should never be crossed
but i said to the world
don't limit my things with lines around it
they are born free—
let them stay free
as i want to go beyond your boundaries
the way i hold love
it was not bound to any shape
but society never stopped
defining my definition of love
maybe their insecurities was the reason
for forcing me to accept their decision
but i would never try to capture love
in the cage of shape
i will never dishonor love
with discrimination, with judgment
i promised love
that when it will enter my life
i will give it a authority to stay as it wants
and a true lover never back out
from their words."

i wish to see my heart
without a hole
from where all the
e m p t i n e s s
in the world
comes
and decide
to reside
in it

just to become someone
who never get hurts;
i try to become an  i m m o r t a l
who lives long,
without feeling sad
to say goodbye to those
who was once standing by his side

he has the eyes that love someone
and that's not me

at that point
my heart realized
not every love call is replied back
like mine

if love could say anything
it will demand
answers
from those
who used the name of love
for hurting a heart
where love bloomed

looking up at the sky,
wishing to be a part of is
what we all dream of—
then come those
who stitch up their feathers to fly;
to prove that you can own that sky
with your efforts
rather than chillin'
if we really desired for the sky,
we had been one of those
but sadly, we can't make a difference
though it's not late

He claimed we were perfect rhymes, you see,
But he forgot, even in rhymes, there are categories.
In the sonnet of love, our lines entwined,
Yet labeled different, destinies maligned.


In the ballad of us, a melancholy refrain,
He missed the nuances, the subtlest pain.
Perfect rhymes, he said, a symphony sweet,
Yet our verses diverged, in sorrow's heartbeat.


As if in a villanelle, repeating our theme,
But the echoes of love weren't as they seemed.
Labeled apart, in the poetry of fate,
A somber truth, our love couldn't abate.


In the rhyme scheme of life, a dissonant chord,
Our love, once harmonious, now ignored.
He said we were perfect, a poetic crime,
Yet in reality, we were running out of rhyme.

you think
one day my memories
will fade away
from your life,
like i did

what a dream you have

you forget one thing
it was not my choice
to leave you
it was your impulsiveness
who drift us apart

i came back to see
the notifications
but you left a message
which made my day

they said look at yourself
in the mirror
and when i did
all i saw a girl
who couldn't say no
who was tired of doing
things she couldn't love
who forgot to smile when
she saw the things she liked
the reflection in mirror
was telling a story
she never thought
could be written for her
can she cry now?
she asked
but shook her head
as this society was not going
to give her the privilege
of being her true self

she said look at the moon
and he looked at her

and the moon asked
whose gonna see him now

when all lovers are busy
looking at each other

they are two
but moon is single

My body was there, but not the soul within,
I felt something strange, a battle to begin.
Unfamiliar feelings, emotions untamed,
Lost in a world where I couldn't be named.


I moved and spoke, but the words felt astray,
As if I were dancing to a tune I couldn't play.
My body, a vessel, devoid of the core,
A silent, empty vessel, craving something more.


In the silence of that moment, I yearned to be whole,
To reunite with my soul, to fill the gaping hole.
For I knew in that instance, what was truly amiss,
My body was present, but my soul was in abyss.

my problems are too much
how can i bother
to celebrate
new year?

another
new year
yet i carry all the same
wounds and bruises

in the darkness of the night so deep,
i wondered why your heart won't sleep,

my soul spoke up, a question sown,
to your heart's mystery, unknown

stars above, they twinkle bright,
but your heart hides in endless night,

my soul implored, with a gentle start,
why's your heart, dear, keeping apart?

weird things happen once
good things happen once
why everything
happens
once?

In the intricate tapestry of love,
the adage "once a cheater, always a cheater"
weaves a cautionary thread.


It is a phrase laden with the weight of experience,
a mantra that whispers of broken trust and shattered vows.


When someone treads the path of betrayal,
leaving the fragments of a once-whole heart in their wake,
the scars run deep.


The echoes of deceit reverberate
in the corridors of love,
leaving those who have been wounded hesitant to trust again.


The notion, "once a cheater, always a cheater," emerges as a defense mechanism,
a shield against the vulnerability of being deceived once more.


Yet, in the realm of love,
the narrative isn't always so black and white.
People evolve, learn from their mistakes, and yearn for redemption.


It's crucial to acknowledge the capacity for change
within each individual.
While the wounds of betrayal may linger,
they need not dictate the course of someone's entire romantic journey.


The human experience is multifaceted, and relationships are complex landscapes.


People stumble, fall, and sometimes, they rise anew, reshaped by the crucible of their own errors.


Love, at its essence, encompasses forgiveness, growth, and the possibility of second chances.


So, while the cautionary phrase carries the weight of wisdom,
it is equally important to recognize the potential for transformation.


People can break free from the chains of their past misdeeds,
learn to value trust, and construct relationships founded on honesty and integrity.


Love, after all, is as much about healing as it is about the initial spark.


In the end the tale of "once a cheater, always a cheater"
is not a universal truth
but rather a reminder that love demands conscientious navigation.


It prompts us to approach relationships with discernment,
to treasure the fragility of trust,
and to foster an environment where growth and change are not only possible but celebrated.

if history  r e p e a t
itself then why they say
it happens only
once upon a time?

if wait is not worth the
reward
then why humans
die wishing
one day
it will all get better
does that ever get better?

our eyes will keep on hiding
the secrets
deep inside our cores

till someone will reach us
with genuine intentions
of providing us with help

that we couldn't provide ourselves with

they will be the one
who believe in their powers unlike us
who can read what we have to say
because they understand thrmselves

making us understand the same logic
soon there will be a day
where we will learn to accept ourselves

overthinking is like
killing yourself
with your own hands
this way you don't need
to hire a killer for yourself to die

pain shows no mercy,
it treats you as an enemy
even when you are always holding
a first aid box–
to heals its wounds
it's like a snake biting you back