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5.3k · Apr 2016
Living Color - Blue
Blue is cool.

   Soft blue waves,
         Caressing the sand
                   Saying it's going to be okay
                                                       -- Calming blue --
                                                                           Still water
                                                              Slight ripples,
                             Causing the water to live

                                                       Blue is not heated.

                                                        Ice cold glaciers,
                                                           Hard as rock
                                                                Slowly melting
                                                         -- Hard blue --
                                                                        Changing ice
                                                                                  Softening heart,
                                                                                           Making the calm blue

                     Blue is understanding, forgiving, and slowing down.
Part of the Living Colors Collection
5.2k · Jun 2016
Pencil Anxiety
My pink mechanical pencil
Is sitting right beside my computer

The brand and lead size
is worn off, from all the use

The eraser has been changed
Countless times

There is graphite dust
in a few places in the grip

My other pencil
the same but purple

Lost its clip
I wiggled my pencil too much

Which is why the purple one
Is out of order

When I'm bored
or anxious

I'll pick up my pencil
Spin it, wiggle it, open and close it

Take apart
and put back together

Anything that can be done to my pencil
Will be done

Thanks to my constant need
for motion
5.0k · May 2016
Untethered Kite
I’m a kite
Attached to a string
Moments of freedom
Reveling in the feeling of the wind
Until a tug
And a pull
Keeps you in place
Reminds me
I’m not truly free

Someone won’t you set me free?
Someone won’t you help me?
Loosen the string
Loosen your hold
So I can fly free
Away from here
Away from the string holding me here

Let me be an untethered kite
I could fly free
Explore the world
Bring joy
With my flashy colors
My vibrant patterns

Instead I am under the control
Of those who keep me
Who decide when I have a few minutes
Riding on the freedom of the wind

I wish I had arms
To reach down
With a pair
Of gleaming scissors
To cut my tether

I wish I had a voice
To tell them what I want
What I think
Because they won’t listen
Won’t pay attention
To my relentless fight
To my constant struggle
Against the confines of my rope

Won’t someone set me free?
Can’t somebody help me?
To become an untethered kite?
3.7k · Jul 2016
Independent Homesickness
I hate this feeling of dread
knowing that no matter how I prepare myself
I won't be able to stop it

No matter who I surround myself with
I cannot stop the inevitable feeling
that I will feel
When I am away from my family
even for a single day

I can't hide from the feeling
of homesick
and I don't think it will change
I know people say being homesick is good. It means you belong somewhere. But I always wonder... What happens when I'm older and alone. When I'm not constantly surrounded by a loving family? What will I do then. I wish I were more independent.
3.6k · Apr 2016
Living Color - Yellow
Yellow like the sun
Like a light, like direction
Bright shining light in the sky
The color of the moon at night
The stars at night
All providing a way for people to see

Yellow like spring
Like new hope, like a fresh start
Bright yellow flowers
The color of baby chicks
The leaves of fall blowing away
All providing sense of renewal

Yellow                                                  ­  
like                                                        
  b­right - new - happiness                                    
.
Part of the Living Color Collection
3.6k · Apr 2016
Bubbles
There are different kinds
All the same
All different
Different sizes and colors
They make up parts of life

Soap bubbles
Cleaning, scrubbing
Washing dirt, grit
And all the bad
Away
Reflecting you
Your surroundings
In different colors
Different views

Word bubbles
Floating up from the heart
Trying to escape
Only a few make it
The rest
Broken inside
Choking you
Restricting you
Making you regret
Not opening your mouth
To let them out

The best kind of bubbles
Bubbles of laughter
Bubbles of joy
Bouncing out of your mouth
Tickling you until you let them out
The fun bubbles
That make that joy
Drawing the wand
Blowing the joy
Into the bubbles
Until they are ready
To go
And spread joy of their own

Bubbles reflect
Joy and sadness
The two polar opposites
That compliment each other
Completely
You cannot have one
Without the other
Sometimes the bubbles of joy
Will pop
Explode in your face
But you can take out your wand
And start all over again
3.5k · May 2016
Blur
I zone out
Staring at the light
Everything becomes
A big bright blur
When suddenly
I wake up
And wonder
*What just happened?
2.7k · Apr 2016
Thorns and Stems
Green crooked straws
******* water from the ground
Supplying the leaves
The thorns
The petals
Helpful and delicate

The thorns
Taking
Not supplying
Anything
But blood
No beauty
Just pain

The petals
The flower
Beautiful
Colorful
Fragrant
The reason for the stem
For the thorns

The thorns protect
The stem provides
The flower blooms
Then the flower dies

The thorns once again
Useless
The stem
Preserving
Until the thorn’s time
Comes again
2.6k · Apr 2016
Seattle
With grey, stormy, rainy skies
Tall vivid evergreen trees
A stunning contrast
2.4k · Mar 2016
Exhilaration
The brand new sun
Fresh from the vacation
In clouds and cold

Taking out the bike
Raising the seat to accommodate
New height

Riding down the smooth hill
Zooming so fast
That you can’t hear someone yell your name

Feeling the wind whip your hair
Your shirt, pants
Legs, arms and face

Seeing a car and coming to a soft stop
Lazily turning around -- heading back up the hill
And doing it all over again
1.9k · Apr 2016
Sticky Gum
Life is like a piece of gum
You unwrap a new piece,
Like a fresh start
You start chewing that piece,
Learning how to live

You can blow it,
Let it expand and expand
Until sometimes
It explodes in your face

It might be hard
To clean it off
Sticking everywhere
Making problems
It might take a while
But as you learn
You’ll get better
Through trials
Until the whole piece
Is back in your mouth

Sometimes the gum will get bland
You’ll get bored and sick
You’ll want something new
Something exciting
Something different

So you’ll spit out your gum
Wrap it in a wrapper
And toss it in the garbage
Where it will stay
So you don’t have to remember
Unless you want to

Then you’ll buy a new
And exciting pack of gum
An exciting flavor!
Maybe cinnamon, maybe fruit
Maybe even a mystery pack

Then you’ll start over
A new chapter
Filled with new tastes
And experiences
Like a fresh piece of gum
Thought of this today, when I bought a new fangled pack of gum. It was a weird flavor, but I wanted to try something different :D
1.6k · May 2016
On the Fence
I look out the window
Into the yard
I see a fluffy Junco
Sitting comfortably on the fence

I see him look around
Then fly over to the feeders
I watch as he gets some seeds
Then goes back to the fence
He puffs back up
And then out of nowhere
A baby Junco
Crookedly and excited
Flies in
Sits next to his dad
And his dad feeds him
And then his dad is off again
To get more food
For his baby

Over the weeks
I watch the Goldfinches,
The Grosbeaks, the Finches,
The Doves, and
The Sparrows.
All gathering on the fence
With their families
To eat
And I am reminded
Of my family
Gathering around the dinner table
Everynight
Chattering, coming and going
But then I think
That those birds must have it far easier
Than we do
All they worry about is surviving
While we have discussions on
Politics, school, wars
Gossip, rumors, things of unimportance

That's when I think back
To my childhood dream
“I want to be a bird when I grow up”
Because they are worry free
Unlike me
1.6k · Jun 2016
Lamp
Click
The room brightens
Twist
I can see better
Push
The monsters in the closet are gone
Turn
I can relax now

The dark is light
With a button or ****
Changing my whole perspective
Of the room
1.5k · Apr 2016
Exhaustion
Cars driving
Trucks going
Ice melting

Factories making
Workers working
Ice melting

Stars living
Poor dying
Ice melting

Science arguing
God watching
Ice melting

Students learning
Teachers talking
Ice melting

World arguing
States fighting
Ice melting

One teen
Wishing
To help
But not knowing how
In this world of exhaustion
So
Ice keeps melting
Just think about it
1.5k · Apr 2016
What Poetry Is
Like a puzzle
Frustrating, beautiful,
And in the end fulfilling
Finding the right words
The right thing to say
That helps you express
The way you want to be

Like a bestfriend
A confidant
Pouring your soul out
Because you can
Your fears
Your desires
Your problems
Your choices

Like a snowflake
Always new
Always different
Always unique
Not one is alike

Like a child’s dream;
An ice cream shop
So many choices
Too many choices
You want them all
You hate them all
You can’t have them all

Like a piece of art
Whether paint or clay
Different formats
Different colors
Different shapes
And different sizes

Like an orchestra
All different sounds
Coming together
To make one big,
Beautiful, enthralling
And emotional sound

Because poetry is poetry
Everything works
Everything fits
Nothing is wrong
Nothing is right
Just freedom
In words
1.4k · May 2016
Shoes By the Door
All scattered around
Some lined up
Some thrown around
Sandals and tennis shoes
Flats and flip-flops
Big shoes and tiny shoes
Showing the busy life
Of  family
Coming and going
1.3k · Jun 2016
Jerk
You look at me
And my head jerks back

What was that?!
It wasn’t me!
Why is my body trying
To torture me

The embarrassment
You must think I’m mental

It's like a knee-**** reaction..
But it's a head-**** reaction.
totally random thing that happened to me today. i don't know why it happens, but sometimes i'll look at something and my head will just **** back... super weird!
1.3k · Apr 2016
Crumbled Words
Pencil scratching words out
Silence
The sound of paper and lead connecting
Rustling
Frustration, not meaning what you write
Eraser comes out
The crumbler of words
Rubs across the unwanted
And now unsaid
Words that don’t let you speak your mind
Wipe the crumbled words away
Let them fly off the table
Land on the ground
Begin an adventure
That only crumbled words can
Rolling out into
Toiaywahds
Shifting
Changing
Fitting
Into what it means
What do I say
The crumbled words representing
Things you would never dare admit
imssoiuy
liveoouy
Unscrambling
Rearranging
Letting themselves free
I miss you
I love you
Brushing those haunting
Impacting, changing words away
Keeping yourself
Alone
Safe
lonely
Inspired by a friend who once told me she called erased words crumbled words
1.3k · May 2016
At the Bus Stop
You stand there waiting
For someone to come
Or something
To take you away
You stand there secluded
Lost in your own little world
Thinking through the days behind
And ahead
Dreaming of what could be
Lost in a world
Of what if’s
And this could happen
Bad things
Good things
Anything you could come up with
Then you hear the sound
Of the bus getting closer
And your ripped out of your
Comfortable little world
And pulled back into reality.
Wake up late
Miss part of school
Come home
Mom’s out of town
Dad’s on a run
Four younger siblings
To take care of
One needs a ride home
Running around at track
One is in a weird mood
Strange emotions
Of a fifth grader
One keeps asking
Where is dad
I told you little man
He just went on a run
The littlest
Complaining about
Having to get off the x-box
After playing for almost
Two hours
The new kitten
Running around the house
Constantly being watched
By the kids
And here I am
Wondering
What will tomorrow bring?
embarrassed
uncomfortable
solitude
withdrawn
apart
empty
secluded­
excluded
reclusive
Isolated
deserted
different
strange
peculiar
­unliked
alone
1.2k · Jun 2016
Sometimes
I’ll look out the window
Oh look! Its raining!
And I’ll want
To go dance in the rain
Sometimes
I’ll grow restless
And think
I need to get out!
And I’ll want
To go on a run
Sometimes
I’m cold
And I’ll think
I’m going to curl up in a big blanket,
With a book and
A cup of hot cocoa and extra marshmallows

And other times
I’ll be sad
Or in a,
I’m going to watch a sad movie
With ice cream
Mood
Just do it! Eat that ice cream!
Cry in that movie!

I’ll think

Sometimes I’ll want
To do some of these things

So I do
1.1k · Jun 2016
Colored Beads
I have a bracelet
Given to me by a friend
Bought in a foreign country

The beads are wooden
The beads are colorful
The string is woven
Throughout and around
The beads

Like our friendship
The outs
And ins
1.0k · May 2016
Bland Beat
I stand there
I can feel the bass
Thumping
As everyone is dancing
I stand there
With my arms feeling too long
Too big for my body
Embarrassed and uncomfortable
Something odd happens within
And a darkness bursts out
Of the light and cheery
That is always within me

And just like that
Goes my good mood
an odd experience I had the other day at a dance
usually I have lots of fun
but for some reason, I just was done
and I was kind of rude to some people -- which I regret
but I've thought a lot about it
and I think the reason I was so poopy, was because I was uncomfortable
and I wonder why that's never happened to me before

But I do hope, it doesn't happen again
1.0k · Mar 2016
Buds
Dark lifeless arms
Reaching out hoping to offer protection
To those who need the shelter
But unable to give the cover
As the white melts away
And the colors start to emerge
That is when the buds appear

Little green leaves
All of them different hues
Unfurling out of their little beds
Bringing life each year
To the no longer alone branches
Tall and small
Bringing new hope
To the little families
Trying to make a new home
Hidden in the shelter of the buds

As the sun goes away
And the leaves start to change
Red, yellow and orange
The wind rustling the branches
As they try once more
But always fail
To hold on to their hope
As it disappears
And wait for the life of next year
In her room, she looked out the window
Seeing the evergreen tree swinging in the wind
The raindrops pelting the window
A few birds, swooping for cover
A little girl standing out in all the gray
Brown hair pulled into pigtails
Wearing bright yellow and red
With a blue polka-dot umbrella
Jumping in puddles
Not even using the umbrella
Unless she was trying to collect rain

Driving to a new state
A new home
Leaving friends
She watched as they drove through a puddle
The water collecting on her window
She imagined that little girl
Her pigtails drooping
Her umbrella dragging
As she walked through the muddy puddles

At school, daydreaming blankly
Looking out the window
As the teacher droned on
About fractions, and decimals
Equations and graphs
She imagined seeing herself
Jumping out the window
Into the puddle on the ground
Splashing water onto the grass and plants
She saw herself
Wearing her favorite yellow raincoat
With her shiny red boots
Her blue polka-dot umbrella
Filled with holes
That the water just ran through
Her hair up in pigtails
With her favorite pink bows

She saw herself as she used to be
Before school was hard
Before she moved
Before she got older
She wished she really could jump out that window
And relive those moments
Before she could dream any further
The teacher called her name
Yanking her out of her red rainboots
Leaving her pink bows laying in the mud
Sadness pulling at her eyes
As she was taken from her happy memories
994 · May 2016
The Thing We Dread
Though for some of us it doesn't happen often
The word usually just flow and create
But sometimes
The flow stops -- and then you can’t continue
The dreaded writer's block
979 · Apr 2016
You're Unknown
You moved in, family friends with mine
Siblings friends with yours
Yet you’re still unknown

I watched you, trying to understand you
Never really talking to you
Just observing, still learning

Interacting around you
Seeing how you act
Different environments
Different people

Quiet, not shy
Funny, but reserved
Unsocial, but not mean

Watching you from across the room
Waiting for you to notice me
Watching you when you finally do

Teasing you but not really flirting
Unspoken discussions
Eyes meeting and agreeing
When our friends say absurd things

Sitting right by each other
Still not really talking
Knowing you, who you are
But you’re still unknown
950 · Apr 2016
Luck
They say it's lucky
A needle in a haystack
Four leafs
Not three
Hold it captive
Force it to help you
Until it shrivels
In your pocket
Pluck it from its home
Torture till it dies
And is no more
Is that luck?
938 · May 2016
The Filter of Sunlight
The drops of gold
Break through
The cover of leaves
I’m hiding behind
Peeking through
Touching me
Warming me
Making me realize
All the good
I’m hiding from
All the things
I should be happy about
The yellow rays
Burning the bad
Purifying my thoughts
Changing my mind
And I run out
Wanting to make a memory
Of this happy
Golden moment.
930 · Apr 2016
When the Birds Came(Junco)
Small, different hues of brown
Little black eyes and tiny pink feet
Junco
Eating the seeds on the ground
Inspiring something inside

The next day,
Clear tubes with red perches
Showed off the mix of seeds
Waiting for the first customer
Disappointed when nothing came

The next week,
Losing hope
Still looking, but not as often
Nothing, the one single Junco
Gone

Then that one day
There were two
Hopping off the fence
Onto those little red perches
Draining the tubes of the food
That had been waiting for them

Slowly but surely
More started coming
New birds
New numbers
Sparrows, finches, thrushes, doves

New feeders
New house

Getting the birds back
A new feeder
Filled with nectar
Waiting patiently
Now knowing it could take a while
And then

One day
Watching out the window
Hoping
That one just one might come
Then not one but three!

All in that one day!
Male and female Anna’s
Male Rufous
Zooming and glimmering
Light reflecting off gorgets
Creating the otherworldly hues
Of purple, red, green

In the days that followed
More feeders
More birds
More knowledge
Much more learned

A new hobby
A new love
That will continue
from that day on
Thanks
To that little
Junco
This is the story of my love of birds started, and is still going
895 · Jul 2016
Eloquently Random
It’s strange.
I want to write elegant poetry
That rhymes
With metaphors
And all the fancy poetic devices

But whenever I start a poem
That I planned on writing
More eloquently
And fancy

It always comes out
Random
Without form
Or anything special

Sometimes I’ll get lucky
And have a few good lines

I used to be annoyed by that
But now
I don’t care
I just want to write my poetry
886 · Jul 2016
Connected Ramblings
Feel great, feel cool, feel nice. Nice people, nice things, nice ice. Ice cream, ice blocks, ice cubes. Cube, pyramid, cone, sphere. Circle, circle of life, what comes around goes around. Ring around the rosey. Tulips, daffodils, daisies, pansies. Scared, frightened, freaked. Surprise, happy, content, friends. Social, shy, outgoing. Going out with friends, going out of town, going to bed. Sleep, cozy, pillows, blankets, nighttime. Stars, moon, owls, darkness. Dark hair, dark chocolate, dark night, Dark Knight. Batman, Superman, Cat-women, Supergirl, Flash. Quicksilver, Scarlet Witch, Captain America, Iron Man, Hulk, Hawkeye, Black Widow, Thor. Pepper Potts, Peggy Carter, Jane Foster. Jane Austen, Charlotte Bronte, William Shakespeare. Elizabeth and Darcy, Romeo and Juliet, Jane and Rochester. Love, tragedy, comedy. Happily ever after, never, future, past, present. Wishes, desires, wants, needs. Thoughts, actions, words, deeds. If, when, now, how. Questions, answers, research. Study, work, write, draw. Art, paint, opinions, facts. Math, history, grammar, science. Religion, faith, beliefs, devotion. Marriage, together, apart. Separate, different, change. Old, new, used. Abandoned, left, alone, useless. Useful, helpful, needed, wanted. A place, person, thing. Adjective, verb, adverb, noun, pronoun, proper noun. Mad Libs.
Don't know if you guys ever do stuff like this, but it helps me think and clears my mind when I do!
814 · May 2016
Thoughts Drifting
I rarely talk to you
I try not to think about you
But when we’re in the same room
My eyes unwillingly
Drift to you
Then my thoughts
And once again I mentally hit myself
Saying
That can not happen again
795 · May 2016
Bookshop of a Brain
If I could go into my mind
Walk around
It would look like
A cute little bookshop
Old and rustic
Books overflowing on shelves
All containing the knowledge my mind holds
A few cobwebs
In high up places
Overstuffed chairs
Made for comfort
When I need it
I imagine an older lady
In charge of the store
Wise for my age
The thoughts of
An 80 year old
In a 14 year old's body
When I was younger
It was probably like the children's section
Pictures filled my mind
Giving me the imagination
To keep my innocence
For as long as I did
My mom would say
That a 36 year old
Ran the shop then
And I, the 7 year old
Was a common costumer

I wish I could
Just live in my mind
And not have to interact
With the outside world

Sometimes I like to think
The boys that I get infatuated with
Will visit my little bookstore
And search the shelves
While I hide in an overstuffed chair
And admire them from the distance

I could go on forever
With this metaphor
Of my mind
So I won’t

While those who read this
Get a quick glimpse
Into my bookshop
And if they look hard enough
They can see the dark haired girl
With a smattering of freckles
Sunk into a chair
With a book in hand
And a pen in the other
As she expands her knowledge
She finishes a book
And adds it to the shelf
Another day
Another adventure
770 · May 2016
Table
With four legs
I am able to stand
But if they break like eggs
I will not work as planned
As I wobble on three, two or even one
Nothing can be placed on me
For my job will be done
Because my legs are the key
Without them I am nothing
I have no use except maybe for scraps
Believe me I’m not bluffing
Eventually I will collapse
And on that day
I know not what I’ll feel
Freedom or dismay
But that day holds strange appeal
kind of showing the way we may feel, if we're not needed
we might feel freed while others may feel like they have no purpose
I guess until that day - that does hold a weird appeal
we'll never know
754 · Apr 2016
Living Color - Red
Red is a paradox

                                                    Red can be hate
                                                 Blood boiling anger
                                              Fist fights and beatings
                                                Rumors and gossip
                                      Red like fall leaves falling away
                                         From the tree - their family
                                   From the other leaves - their friends

Red the color of a hot temperature

                                                   Red can be love
                                                Pretty little blushes
                                             Passion and friendship
                                     Beating hearts and broken hearts
                                         Red like a rose symbolizing
                                         Thorns - the hard struggles
                                 The petals - the good and wonderful
Red is bold.
.
Part of the Living Colors Collection
754 · May 2016
A Wish for Sometimes
Sometimes
I wish I could just sit
With a cup of hot cocoa
A book in hand
Draped in blankets
And watch the pink sunset out my window

Sometimes
I wish I could just stop everything
And take a nap
Whenever I wanted

Sometimes
I wish life was far more simple
Like it used to be

Sometimes
I wish I could freeze time
Or even time travel
To fix mistakes
To tell myself - why would you do that?!

Sometimes
I wish I could fly
Free like a bird
With no worries
But the next meal

Sometimes
I just wish
I could slow down
Put things on hold
And take a break
From life
739 · Sep 2016
It's Been What? Two Months?
I tried to hold it off.
Keep the sadness at bay.
But tonight,
Looking through pictures and
Remembering old times

The tears started flowing
And this time
I didn’t hold them back
738 · May 2016
A Sort of Ode
Piping hot
Gooey and fluffy
Rolls of dough
Swirled
With sugar
Cinnamon
And butter
And on the top
Slowly oozing
Melting down the sides
Is glaze
Or frosting
Whichever
Is your cup of tea

This miraculous invention
Forever changing
Human life
As we know it
A cinnamon roll
The most amazing
And tasty
Thing known
To mankind
738 · Jun 2016
Eyes
Some of the craziest blue eyes
That you’ve ever seen
Bright blue eyes
Always observant
Always watching

Dull green eyes
Never noticing
Never seeing

What do you do
When the one you want
Is the one who doesn't notice you
727 · May 2016
Too Tired
I got three hours
Of sleep last night
And the one day
Something new
Or exciting happens
I’m too tired
So when I notice you
Starting to stare at me
From across the room
Watching you find ways
To touch me
Brushing my arm as you go by
Moving your knees
Back and forth
Until ours touch
But I was too tired
To think about you
All I could think about
Was my cozy bed
Waiting at home for me
And now
Writing this poem
I realize that maybe…
I should try to get more sleep
I slip in my ear buds and lean against the window

Remembering pulling on my coral and daisy rain boots
Pulling on my rain coat
Walking outside, rain dripping out of the clouds
Puddles splashing as I walk through them
The reflection of the tree’s in the pond
The birds flying low, staying under cover

A big puddle is in the middle of the sidewalk
I jump in it.
Drops of water fly everywhere.
A grin makes its way to my face        “Watch it!”
And melts back off.

I continue to trudge to the bus stop.
Standing there alone amid all the people.
My bright colors stand out in all the dark.
I can feel the eyes burning into me, but I refuse to give in.
The bus comes, we get on and we go

I sit in the same seat
Alone
I unzip my bag, fish out my phone and earbuds
Preparing for another day of loneliness,
That the brightest color of boots will never change.
717 · Jun 2016
The Heart Wall
Sometimes I imagine
The wall I would build around my heart
If I needed to
Maybe it would be made of red bricks
Maybe sticks or straw
That a wolf could easily blow down.

Maybe it would be a huge concrete wall
Solid and hard
Maybe it would be made of metal
With bolts connecting the rounds
Maybe it would be hard to get through

Maybe my wall would be made of glass
Easy to see through
Delicate
Easy to break
But beautiful in the light

Maybe I won’t build a wall
I’ll be easy to read
Easy to break
Easy to hurt
Vulnerable to the outside storm
or maybe... I'll hire Donald Trump to build and keep people out... I don't think it would last very long...
712 · Apr 2016
Words
meaningless things drifting in your mind
they don't matter
they can't change anything
they say
sticks and stones may break my bones
but words will never harm me


thats not true
words hurt
through and through
they make you shrink
inside yourself
smaller and smaller
until there is nothing left
and nothing left for you to do
inspired by an amazing friend of mine, who went through a struggle with depression -- and to those who suffer it now
697 · May 2016
For My Mother
I usually take for granted
All the things my mom does for me
The things she sacrifices
And goes without
So I can be happy
So I can have what she dosen’t
So my childhood would be better
Than hers

Instead of getting herself new clothes
She survives on the same ones
From years and years before
So I can have new wardrobe
Each new school year

She pays for activities
Afterschool fun and sports
That aren’t required
Aren’t needed but wanted
She drives me back and forth
Waiting for the day I could do it myself

Listening to my pointless stories
And putting up with my bad habits
Helping with decisions
And giving me wisdom
That I get annoyed with
But I know she just wants the best

This poem could go on
And on and on
About all the things
My mother does for me

I know not everyone is as lucky
As I am
With a mother who would do so much
Just to see me happy
And I will always be grateful
For everything she does for me
Because she loves me
And because of that
I love her
696 · Apr 2016
every once in a while
Every once in awhile
I can’t help
But feeling
Completely clueless

How do people see me
When I’m alone
What do I look like
Being asked to move
Knowing no one
Dosen’t help
As they all assume
I’m all alone

I feel clueless
When I don’t know what they’re saying
But I don’t ask for clarification
In fear of those patronizing looks and smiles

I am clueless
When it comes to the real world
I haven’t had enough experience
Perhaps I didn’t pay attention
When I really should have

I don’t understand
What people are going through
I don’t see the signs
That show
The fears and troubles
They are trying to fix
I just stand there
Blind
Thinking all is right
When all is wrong

I stand there
Thinking how great my life is
I don’t have big troubles
School, grades
Thats it

Still clueless
Still oblivious
I doubt I’ll learn.
686 · Mar 2017
I hate not being there
I'm here not there and it breaks my heart
I hear new stories everyday
And I wish I was there

I left so many friends behind
Ones that stayed in touch
Others that stopped responding

How did we go from talking every day
To never speaking again?
I would ask you how you're doing.

Good. That's all I got. It's all I get.

Friends I'm worried about
That don't respond
And I can't ask others about them.

Because I was their confidant.
I was the one you could tell anything.
I regret the one time I was stupid.

The one time I didn't know
I didn't know what to say
How to handle your words.

I still love her.
I love everyone.
But I said the harsh ones too soon.

The understanding ones too late.
Instead of being the confidant I was the judger.
I wouldn't blame her if she stopped trusting me.

Whenever I think of what I said.
I regret it a hundred times over.
No matter how sorry I was.

You can't take back words.
Once they are out they are free.
I can't just erase them.

I'm not a judgmental person.
Maybe I once was.
A long time ago.

And maybe when I'm shocked
I revert back to my old self.
Maybe that's why

I said those things I said
Maybe that's why
I couldn't look at you

Not because I didn't like you
Not because I didn't love or trust you
Because I didn't know what else to do

And when you get scared
When you have anxiety like I do
You go back to being the old you.
639 · May 2016
The Back of Your Hand
People always say
How they know the back of their hand
So well
That they could find it anywhere
I think I could too
But I guess you’ll never know till you try

I wonder if you could know someone that well

I wish I did know someone that well
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