Saint Audrey Nov 24

Every passing moment
Caught myself staring at the blissful sky
On my ceiling

Awash in the glow
Of light that hides away just out of frame
Burning me low

Thoughts of my life still beckon, as the world takes a somber tone
But the timing is right, pulled in an undertow

To stray from the dark,  finding myself so alone
And yet I'm found, Isn't that enough?

A gilded cage for me, true
I'd rather let the summer air drench the weathered wood
And permeate my bedroom, then
Lie here lifeless
Nothing left to fight
Only time

Ilion gray Nov 24

The truth is that we are all losing our minds a little here
On earth
                ...........Aren't we?
Watching the air painted gray
Bleeding rain
Dripping from endlessness onto you
Racing down your forehead gently
Riding the sweat of your neck
down the crevice of your chest
Down down through your toes
Until it is more you than it is a raindrop.
We are all losing
You who are grinning
Thinking that
Have secretly been winning,
You too have lost
I will tell you now
Do not bend
For sometimes bending requires
Forgetting the truth,
And no one will be there
To straighten you,
But broken pieces are gods
Gift to the wind,
And you
Are too, and you will be there!
Wherever it takes you!

A Nov 20

It came thru on a dagger
Spending my last earn faster
Sped up the toxicology to my master
He leans in with a coarse demeanor
Contemplating courses to make it last her
Devils worship in his eyes are blacker
Souls deepen their bloodied grips harder
Speculation drives the people’s brain madder
Insisting on it’s return to the last crater
We push our own to the edge quicker
Lava molding our faces with anger
Desperately gnawing for clarity's charger
Creating glimpses of light for the masses

Anna Nov 18

Snowdrops will soon wake up
from their sweet dreams,
feeling the cold, light
and fluffy snow around,
the rays of sunshine falling over them.
Spreading fresh and pleasant frangrance.
Embellishing the season with their shiny, white colour.
They don't want to be detached from home - the soil.
They don't want to be trampled.
They want to be loved just as us.

parttimeboy Nov 11

I wake up, sweating
I dreamt about it again
My parents finding out.

It's World War 2.
My mom is driving down the road behind me,
Chasing me.
She is driving a nazi's car.
I'm running down a way so many people before me ran down
They, too, shared my or a similar secret

But I see contact mines in front of my feet, everywhere
My mom smiles and waves, makes a horrible face
I smile and wave back, feeling more and more dead
Than alive

I know this dream
I'm supposed to end up with the girl at the end
It's supposed to have a nice end
But it doesn't

Because I wake up, sweating
I dreamt about it again
My parents finding out.

This poem is based on one of my nightmares about coming out to my parents that I've had this night. Since coming to terms with being bisexual, I've had dreams like these often, but until now, they were all different. So I might document them like this whenever I have them - the nazi part was probably influenced by a talk I went to yesterday evening, a talk by a 87-year-old survivor who was forgotten during one of the death marchs in 1945 when she was one year younger than I  am now.
Kate Gilleo Nov 9

I've come out before
when I was fourteen
as a lesbian
in front of everyone I love
about who I wanted to love
and they grew silent
pretending to not have heard.

I've come out before
when I was sixteen
as a Christian
about He whom I've devoted myself to
to show how much I care, enough
in front of people who seem to care enough

I've come out before
when I was sixteen
as a young adult
in a coming-of-age tradition I don't care about
in front of people I don't care about

Now I come out again
at eighteen
as a dead woman walking
in a place where I am sharing my story
with people who need to hear my story

Anna Grace Oct 18

Whispers you’re no good for me
In the corners of my mind
Everytime i come back we fit so perfectly
But i’ve wasted too much time,
Stuck in orbit around you
The gravity around here
Just isn’t meant for a pair of two.

Every Time I crash back down
I run back into you.
Seasons change,
They rearrange,
Somehow we never do.
Frustrating, you’re intoxicating,
Shape up or ship out,
Just figure your shit out.

I sat beneath the fallen stars,
somehow finding fault in their guidance
when I walked along a deserted path
all because my pride was far too fragile
to leave in the open;

Woes splayed out like a forgotten book,
Tattered pages, innocence long faded―
memories hidden between every word,
yet the reality of my existence sets in at sunrise,
then my dreams crumble down to a lonely whisper into the night.

And I must face the pain,
the anger,
the confusion,
that has overcome every cell in my body
until I am nothing but a reflection of the scars their ghosts left behind.

But, I refuse to look back into that bottomless pit,
hungry for my sense of worth,
no matter how many times it calls my name,
begging to feel whole for just one day;

I won’t go back.

Still, I have traveled down that road with nothing but miles and miles of empty sky,
searching for meaning in every untouched stone,
and every shallow grave.

Yet, no one told me that the traces of skeleton touches would still burn holes in my skin,
that the silver bullets would rip through to my core,
leaving me vulnerable vulnerable in a world that preys on the weak,
and bleeding on the shards of my broken heart like paint to a canvas,
only the wounds never heal.

And it’s an endless ride down a two-way street,
signs screaming “dead-end”,
but you keep going,
thinking that maybe you can change its route.

Behind the facade of cracks filled with gold
and faltered smiles too heavy to pick up again and again,
there is a scared little girl inside,
unwilling to greet the future with open arms,
terrified to take the first step out that door because the minute she does,
it all becomes real,
and reality is the biggest dream-killer.

I've been running from the demons lurking in the past without actually seeing that they are only the contours of my mistakes
and they do not define me,
they do not define me;

They do not define me.

I’ve never looked beyond the ruins,
I’d only seen the darkness that I welcomed so warmly,
but I never saw the light underlying,
so much stronger than the misery,
and if i’d known that this journey,
that realization knocking on my door,
was so promising,
I never would have taken a step back.

I never would have believed for a second that things couldn’t get better
and that the darkness was forever,
but i’ve seen the future and its pleas for redemption;

And I’m listening,
I’m listening for the first time in so long.

It’s calling to me,
and I go because life is about taking chances
and if I hid behind my fear forever,
I would never give myself a chance to change

After all, I am simply human.

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