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May 10 · 304
All these people
Pax May 10
If all these people hated me
will you hate me as well?

If all these people laugh at me
will you laugh with them?

If all these people left me stranded
will you leave me as well?

Well, everything is left unsaid
I hope someone knew
deep inside iM hurting myself

Sorry dramatic isn't it, sometimes this feelings comes and goes, i just want to put it out there like its nothing, like crying alone is a regular thing.. Sigh..
Apr 26 · 539
uncharted
Pax Apr 26
I Sense your
morning movement
as you wrap
your sweetest embrace
into my cold heart
bringing heat
to my uncharted
territory
I surrender…

I rave at your arrival
as you drain
my pool of
longing then
satisfying
my hunger
forever
I remember…
An old piece.
Apr 16 · 261
Goodbye lullaby
Pax Apr 16
i took a peek, then never again.

What's beyond that window
Lies a curse i did, a sacrifice
I took and a burden i carry.

Goodbye lullaby, as i sleep
soundly towards the end.
Promptly written while watching my window.
Apr 13 · 199
empathetic
Pax Apr 13
Why do i feel much and yet experience so little.
Perhaps its been a Curse, being to sensitive at times...
Mar 19 · 365
Shinning
Pax Mar 19
Your the shinning example of
Love i never got to see.
So be at ease to
The one you've found
Love grows when
U cherish it.
Mar 2 · 360
illustionary love
Pax Mar 2
If i kiss you here.
Will that brings us together?
Will our love be an ever after?

If i touch you there
will that bridge build faster,
for us to be together?

if this illustionary love be real
I'd be a thief, a forbidden deal
Holding a broken seal
Of the unspoken truth
Of everyone i'll hurt.

I don't want that, I'd rather be alone
And hold a heart of stone.
Be at peace to the dream out of reach.
At least i know how to love.
A fictitious write, me dreaming, kissing something forbidden. Many thanks to those who read.
Mar 1 · 179
Failure, I
Pax Mar 1
A repetitive omen
that we learn to avoid
over time.
Still bad at it, but im Learning though it takes time, patience is all i have.
Nov 2019 · 1.0k
Abyss
Pax Nov 2019
I fell deep into your abyss
drowning into lust
I swim yet your torrent
drag me down under.

Beyond my last breathe
I resign to sigh my regret
I died in your arms
Loving you was my sin.
Painful love
Nov 2019 · 1.1k
love me as you wish
Pax Nov 2019
you undress my heart
so delicately
untill I drown
breathlessly
in your embrace


love me as you wish
Sorry for being away...

I missed writing...
Jun 2019 · 1.2k
After all
Pax Jun 2019
its the night when your
life becomes sleepless

your day might be reckless
doing things after things
of uselessness

i am tired,
no, i don't need sleep
no, i don't need rest
i just want that feeling
i could hold and hug
to where i kiss and wish
be loved for me to love back

i sigh waiting for a sign
that i am still alive
after all.
I feel so dead, feels so cold for so long..
Happy B-Day to me.
May 2019 · 3.3k
poets
Pax May 2019
most of us are lonely
often our pools are too deep and
no one seem to bother swimming in our depths
perhaps it takes a skilled diver to understand
our inner core.

and because we feel too much
we drown ourselves in the pool of
sorrows, dying in self pity.
Apr 2019 · 1.9k
Heaven
Pax Apr 2019
My heaven is in you.
Truly i wish ill find you.
Apr 2019 · 1.2k
Bound to be deep
Pax Apr 2019
I was bound to be the only ocean
too deep for you to love.
And my waves are to harsh for you to see my Beauty.
Apr 2019 · 1.1k
Light
Pax Apr 2019
In your darkest days
I became your light
But in mine you
Never were
I wonder.
Sometimes its tiring to be just the light. You never got to see my darkness, because you were not there.
Mar 2019 · 626
never gone
Pax Mar 2019
I was never gone,
yet I was not even seen.
How could you ever love me
If you still never see me.
Jan 2019 · 1.1k
Ocean
Pax Jan 2019
Your beauty never fails in calming me.
Me seeing the ocean
Jan 2019 · 778
Near me
Pax Jan 2019
In the busiest days I still find time to look at you and just feel you near me.
a quote.
A reminder.
A love like no other.
Happy New Year.
Despite being busy,
Its a must to find time
For a love one.

Pax
Dec 2018 · 2.0k
Ocean ripple
Pax Dec 2018
A rippling effect
has the ocean
grace us, love
never left us
apart
as time
stumble into
a halt
turning
bad memories
into a
nightmare
simply forgotten,
we changed
for the
better...
A prompt of a pic. I took, see my instagram.
Dec 2018 · 325
to be loved
Pax Dec 2018
how broke are you,
to make you this weak?
how am I able to
fix you when
you, yourself
never allow me too...?

I am the little flicker
able to flip worst
into a brighter
light.

please have patient
and be lenient
to thy self
it's never too
late, to believe
and hope
a light
will come,
even a fool
has a chance
to be loved.
sometimes I am thinking on giving up this life
but some flicker keeps me going, telling me
to go on as best as I can. even if its lonely
even if its tiring, I still can carry on, I hope
so, hope ill last the best I can... so i hope you
too dear readers...
Dec 2018 · 896
Sky
Pax Dec 2018
Sky
Those times when my ocean almost reach your sky.
Quote,Poem
Nov 2018 · 458
Numb
Pax Nov 2018
I scream towards emptiness
as it only echoed a numbing silence
its no used to abused
the strained voice
and struggled curses
all seems useless
so just give in
to the given
feeling
for a time
just once in a while
*Screeching in Silences*
Deprived old soul,
Poisoning my own
World.
Nov 2018 · 689
Weed
Pax Nov 2018
I was left hanging
in your garden heart
yet I was only a ****
who never got your
attention.
https://www.instagram.com/willyampax
Nov 2018 · 736
Blood
Pax Nov 2018
you lure me like
a mosquito
craving for your
blood
starving
for your
love.
But then
like any other
insects
you fear
Me.
Sep 2018 · 3.3k
Dream
Pax Sep 2018
I fall into the deepest dream.
Hug by darkness, i give in.
Then by miracle i was torn
to be reborn.
it's been long...
Jul 2018 · 4.3k
Pride
Pax Jul 2018
Your pride is too high
you can't
even fly.
just saying.
a quote
a shoutout
a reminder
its really okay to have it we all do but we need to even it out
balance is everything.
Jul 2018 · 10.1k
Phoenix
Pax Jul 2018
There is only
one you in
every
lifetime.
Multiple meanings
Jul 2018 · 597
Job
Pax Jul 2018
Job
Your sincerity
becomes a
menial job.
There are too few good doctors now a days. This is just how i feel in my country.
Jul 2018 · 1.8k
What makes a poem - a poem?
Pax Jul 2018
What makes a poem
- a poem?
Does it express your
emotional life and
the selfish deeds
it contains
.... then you shamelessly
Share it...

Does it really matter
someone might
read it or not?
Someone might
understand you or
not, does that really
matter?

In the world
we live in
many hearts
have died
for they don't
know how our
pen works.
How it does
- what it does.

When a poem
does all the
technicalities,
it may seeks
the power of
fame and fortune
but does it really
matter?

I may not understand
fully what makes a poem
- a poem. But behind all
of it, I'm just here
trying to write a poem
whom my heart
spoke out loud
like he never could.
"How many have to die
so that you can feel loved.
by Florence + the Machine"

you know her music resonates my darkness.
her music really tugs some heartstrings I
tried to hide.
Jun 2018 · 1.1k
first love
Pax Jun 2018
Doesn't matter who
come first in your heart
as long as I was the one
who stayed
true to my love
for you.

you were never
alone...
first love only last as long as you stayed true to your love. sometimes the heart gets tired, it weathers as you stop nourishing its root - neglect and broken trust, a heart can die.

thanks for reading.
May 2018 · 1.9k
How do you love the Unloved?
Pax May 2018
Too many shattered Mirrors
Mirroring my sins.

Too many walls
Hindering my wings.

My growth remains
  still
as silence Kills.

How do you love the
Unloved?
I was never a writer
I was just some poet
Who seek some
understanding in my
understatement @pax

at times I feel so tired...
thanks to those who still read me..
May 2018 · 605
Evaded
Pax May 2018
My life is a stroke of luck
in order to have a good life,
Ive sacrifice the blooming
Scent of lotus
Never having
Never falling
only taking
Comfort on the
Sidelines and
Shadowy shelters,
Seems happiness
has evaded me....
I leave with this quote of mine as a reminder for me:

The thing about waiting is
it takes much longer
since from the start
you never make a move.
Apr 2018 · 9.7k
enslaved
Pax Apr 2018
You've enslaved my heart
before I could ever say
I'm willing.
a quote

I want to say my thanks to my long time friend beth by saying this: your writing searches for truth from our deepest wells of feeling.
Apr 2018 · 967
dimlit star
Pax Apr 2018
You were the dimlit star
I am trying to reach.

You've lost much
of your glow
how I wish
my light would reach you, and
teach you
     that in life
you're ever so beautiful.

How the harsh words of the world
barricades you soft spoken heart
into stones.
thank you all in reading my lightly lit star in my so dim world.

ive secluded much of my world into the four corners of my home, hated to see how harsh can the world judge me. also hated this part of me, a coward. I needed to remind myself of this feeling to move forward even a little step will do.
Mar 2018 · 9.2k
lost
Pax Mar 2018
You've loved them
enough to know,
- You'd lost.
A quote
Mar 2018 · 785
envy
Pax Mar 2018
At most insecurities defines every envy.
a quote, 6w.

not sure either ill come back or not, writing seems so far away. my darkness keeps invading. life's darkness its weakening my defences..

I truly wish everyone is okay here and doing fine.
Jan 2018 · 1.4k
never have i
Pax Jan 2018
Never have i lived to cherish
a bloosoming flower nor
never have i found one
to begin with.

Never have i been cherished
for people only see my dying
roots nor
never have i reach my full
growth,
i remain the
sapling who have
been judge too
      many to count.

Never have i want to reach
the losing end
a certain limit
So near, i fear.....
a poet for me - are thinker, observer, admirer of beauty, emotionaly smart but most at the time they're sad people looking for  understanding. @pax
Nov 2017 · 1.1k
Indifferent
Pax Nov 2017
as much as I crave warmth
I can't when
my veiws of the world
are much so
indifferent.
A shoutout. A qoute. Alone.
Nov 2017 · 793
Grounded
Pax Nov 2017
My life is not fair and square
it's round and grounded.
Hello my friends sorry for being away, for the past previous months i was busy transferring my things exiting saudi arabia... Now im back here in the Philippines finally, its good to be home and the bad thing is im jobless for the mean time which is challenging considering our country's situation as usual.. Thanks for reading...
Aug 2017 · 1.1k
unglowing
Pax Aug 2017
I was the star
who lost his
glow -

automated
as I function
living for the
sake of living
as my heart
has stop breathing
the love he
suppose to
give.

so...
I burried my own
unglowing star
thinking
its hopeless.

I've been reading, reading,
watching, watching,
and working, working
same old, same old
until I lost my glow
and stop being wishful
as I know time has stop
as I drop
my dream,
sometimes....

I lived because
I can still pretend.
I guess this will be my last post for a while but I will not be gone just around. writing seems so away now, I guess that my life becomes dull as my heart slowly turning to a stone. this piece pretty much explain what ive been doing. I will write again when im back in my own country, it's good news to me that im exiting suadi Arabia, soon...sigh... another big challenges will come to me, another big step i'll take....
Jul 2017 · 14.3k
sharp
Pax Jul 2017
No lies escapes someone's sharp mind.
just saying, quick reminder, a quote, 6 words story.
Jul 2017 · 13.4k
left behind
Pax Jul 2017
im used to
being left
behind.
so it doesn't hurt anymore.

6words story.
Jul 2017 · 2.1k
disability
Pax Jul 2017
your disability is never your weakness,
its your greatest motivation
in finding
the strength
within...
just a quick reminders....
a quote
Jul 2017 · 1.6k
right & wrong
Pax Jul 2017
I can say the right things
yet in the wrong time,
while I say the wrong things
in the right time.
seems contradicting but in truth, I better stay silent and listen more than confronting any situations thats for the later part....
Jul 2017 · 1.7k
music sheet
Pax Jul 2017
there's a solemn tune in my core
that longs for warmth
- a melodic rhythm
that produces spring's blossom.

though my core is in
solemn mood
but the mind speaks
otherwise
  - its a mess.

still,
never have i asked
something great
like a grand
Autumn concerto
just wanting
his own
music sheet
playing the song
to the one
     who cares.

for how long
will I be
patient,
or where will
I ever find the sign
for the right
notes befitting
to my tunes?

asking questions
only time can tell.
I'll wait....
longing i knew so well...
Jun 2017 · 2.4k
company
Pax Jun 2017
you don't know how to carry
the burden of being alone
you can try by pretending
to have company.

But in the end of the
day, sleep
is your
best friend.
just a simple shout-out to self
Jun 2017 · 12.8k
often
Pax Jun 2017
often tough times taught us to write.






© pax
I'll leave this quote to everyone...
thanksss....
May 2017 · 912
Plagiarized
Pax May 2017
A piece of my heart
has been sliced
to where its been crushed
to blend
something new.

I've grown to
understand
the big sea
to where I was
afraid of being aware
this might
happened
.
.
.
then, it already has
as so I let it be
for a time
that I never forgot
nor forgive
what they
did.

I know my flaws
are evident,
it is what makes
who I am, 'not perfect'
as I improved,
honed and
proved to feel
the understanding
of the big sea
but it doesn't mean
you can freely capture
someone's heart
to tear apart,
*a sincere poet
never steals the
life of others.
Not sure where to start, as to the poem itself speaks volume, I've been away from writing because of my busy schedule when i came back i found out that one or two of my work are stolen. I was never really a great writer to begin with as to i wonder why they would steal from me. And there's also stories that uses my quotes without crediting me, sigh... Perhaps this is the reality. sad, disappointed and distraught to myself, but everything is a risk, so posting in all writing/poetry sites, your words are bound to be stolen when someone liked it without you knowing it. sigh.... "i write not!" was one of the stolen.
May 2017 · 9.3k
unanswered
Pax May 2017
I've left my feelings
unanswered.
just a quick shout out, short but it says what is just needed to say. Less but not much. Sorry for being away, its seems like i just bottled up my feelings yet again and stow it away to be a faded unanswered feelings... sigh...

i hope everyone(my literary friends) are well...

thank you for reading...
Apr 2017 · 1.8k
Deserted Tears
Pax Apr 2017
I've driven myself in
to the valley of deserted
Tears.

To where it's too hot,
while living is an isolation.

There's no river nor
lush forest around,
its as dry as the desert
sands, then humidity
strikes your nerves
that you'll feel
overcooked.

The crimson sky
Bleeds of its inking
Beauty...

I on the other hand
solidify my strength
to ease the burden
I carry, as i lift myself
Little by little towards
A meaningful step
For SURVIVAL!

© pax
I wrote this as a means to remind myself for the beauty of life.
Apr 2017 · 889
Happy quote?
Pax Apr 2017
I don't want my life to be
amazing, i just want it
to be happy...
Aren't we all want this? there are some happiness that are short, some takes longer, and some never arrive at all. There are some happiness that  are amazing or simple - big or small... I guess my happiness didn't arrive yet, as i am a late bloomer or very much reserved to the point of being afraid... im still overcoming that.. this thought/quote sprang to mind thinking i don't want an amazing life, with all the luxury or many amazing achievements, i just want to be loved and to love back in the simplest way of life, but i guess its still too much to asked. :(
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