one by one
each card is dealt to you,
another chance comes your way,
seven new chances lie in your hands.

each card
is full of new hope, opportunity and desires,
you take a close look at them all
with those gleaming eyes.

to you this is nothing but a game
as you feel no shame,
you skip over other’s emotions
and reverse the connections you have made.

you proudly discard them each
one at a time
and pick up more along the way,
before leaving the others behind.

they eventually all are placed in your discard pile
until there is a singular one left,
a single card, she is all that is left,
and you contently call “uno”.

your turn approaches again,
you look down at your final card
with your gazing green eyes,
and you place her too, in the discard pile.

it was just a matter of time before you discarded me as well.
IV.

I have colored
my life
in rainbows
once more,
the life you once
tainted in black
and sadness.

Take me to the river,
wash me clean,
wash me clean.
I want the stain of her removed,
from every scrap of everything.
Take me to the river,
wash me clean,
wash me clean.
Singe her stench from my soul, burn every fiber of my being.

Take me to the river,
wash me clean,
wash me clean.
I want to be free of her memory,
and the song that we'd sing.
Singing, Oh, Lord,
Grant me renewal,
give me in grace.
I can still feel the love
though now it has a bitter taste.

Goodbye

This is a product of my emotions
Messy as it is
Jumbled and in need to be released.

I’m saying goodbye,
To the past so beautiful and green,
To the darkness so bright and dull.

I’ve hidden myself for way too long,
Spent days running from the corners and hiding from my demons,
Accepting fate but not realizing it.

I’m saying goodbye.

As I write this my mind holds me back, it whispers to my heart that “It doesn’t hurt”
Yet my heart stares blankly, wondering “If it doesn’t hurt why am I so clouded with this pain, why do I want to fix us over and over again?”

It’s painful, having this need to fight
Having this gnawing feeling inside.

How does one say goodbye to someone they once loved?
Someone you would and still will do anything for them?
I’ve watched my hope wither with each second of empty promises, broken dreams and unfulfilling conversations.

I heard my heart shatter into pieces consistently from truths that I was hearing from third parties while you confidently orchestrated lies to me.
My mind warned me, sparks flew from then.
It told me that we were done but my heart refused, “This is all a misunderstanding”, “I’m not quite as open, I’m to blame”

Running on those words, I healed my heart with lies. But as flashbacks of when I teared my walls, showed you how defenseless I was as grief and mourning controlled me, was I not open enough?
Or was it too much that I was not worth the honesty?

I sensed my eyes prick with tears as I noticed how much of a season I am to you.
It hurts, not as much as it should be and thanks goes to my mind.
“As long as you anticipate it. It won’t be that bad” it said.

There’s no fixing us,
There’s no being about this facade,
No matter how ‘happy’ I might have been.

But why,
Am I so hopeful that the lie you sputtered of fixing us will be turned to truth?

Why?
When my heart needs to understand that this is goodbye
Your silence and lack to reach out screams in agony of goodbye.
So why am I still hoping?

Luisa 5d

He didn’t love me, not really,
He just didn’t want to be alone.

He wasn’t prepared to wait for me,
He enjoyed watching me hang on his every word.

He never intended to be faithful,
He always had another girl on the go.

He never felt a soulmate connection,
He beguiled me into believing the lies.

He never wanted “us” the way I once did,
He just wanted to bring me down into his darkness.

He wanted what all narcissists want,
Adoration, Affirmation and a new member of his harem.

He will one day realise that I was everything and he is left with nothing. I will rise, my heart will again be free. The way it’s going to start is by learning to love me.

HOOPS11 6d

For too many years i'v been writing poems about wanting to die,
but not knowing how and not having a clear reason as to why.
But this poem is a little different from the ones before,
as this poem is a little bit more happy rather then a little bit more sore.
The past is where all my memories are,
where I was planning to take my life with a car.
So many people have told me to forget the past,
but i always wanted to remember and for another day to last.
But let's forget all that and move onto the present,
where now i understand what the past really meant.
I am happy to say that i have finally started to move on,
all the things that caused my life to stop are gone.
The voices, the place, the faces and perfumes that i used to remember,
are now all gone and I am now able to live in December.
It's been nearly a year since i'v been going to the gym,
it's been a huge part of my life meaning that remembering the past is very slim.
I used to hate looking at myself in the mirror,
now I do it everyday and the future seems a bit more clearer.
My cat has helped me to cope with the anxieties that i have,
she keeps me happy rather then sad.
My parents have changed me to how i am today,
now i'm looking forward to each and everyday.
So my message is as simple as it gets,
go through each day like it is your best.
Remember live life slowly because it's not a race,
I am still living life but i have finally arrived at my happy place.

Here it is, my long awaited journey put into a poem, I hope you like it.
P.s: remember to never ever give up, it will become worse before it becomes better, I am living proof of that. Thank you all for the support!
Neharika Dec 6

I resign from your love
It's far too hard a job
My experiences have been too rough
I give my all but it isn't enough

Where does your love come from anyway?
Is it your gut that gives it away?
Myriad words I could right now say
If only it mattered, I could go on all day.

My walls are all blank, I stripped all our pictures
It reminded me of my failure; your silence tortures.
I munch no more popcorn like we used to in the movies.
I watch movies no more either, just hoping to be at ease.

I've had enough of my dreams crushed
Not sure if they can be reimbursed
It's far too hard, even for a job
I quit, I resign from your love.

Joshua Hobbs Dec 4

I sit here, Thine memory O' mine.
Didst Thou see it?
The Setting Sun of a Dream long past.
One of sweet morning Tea;
One with warm midnight Hugs.

A lifetime ago,
Lost in the Tear;
It's destination: A young boy's Dream.
Placed upon Thy hand, sealed with a kiss.

The dying flame that kept my promise to Thee,
it's ashes now lay the soil of what is to become.

The miles I traveled, both Land and Sea,
even through the Air, I flew like a bird for Thee.
Now, I fear I may never see Thy smile again.

If I ever look for Thee, only pain will I find.
But I will keep the gifts Thou has given me.
Courage and Solace.

Courage, to live on without Thee.
To of taken that first step into a bigger world,
I could have never imagined.

Solace, to live on knowing I am a man of my word.
A word that was given to a young woman so long ago.

May Thine happiness be found amongst the Earthly fields.

I will miss her, but I can't let it kill me. The boy died on that trip. Now, only a man remains. I wish you all the best in life.
HOOPS11 Dec 4

"Certian people remember certain things from the past e.g. perfume or smell, voice, face, place etc. A person can truly say that they have moved on when that person passes by something or someone which before they would have stopped and smelled a certain perfume, have recognised a certain face or recognised a voice, or recognised a certain place, then that person at that moment will pass by and not recognise a single thing of the past, then that person can truly say that they have moved on, because they have simply forgotten."

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