As I sit here trimming weed
Wondering
About you and me
I have beautiful souls in my life
Telling me to
Just be me
So I’m gonna listen
I’m gonna be happy
Content
Joyful
And pleased
Because the ghost in me
Will eventually leave
Im not going to lie
I cried
All the nights
Since I saw you
For the last time.
The last time
I saw you
Before that day
We were happy together
I was leaving your house
You called me back
And gave me a kiss
And said bye
I said I will see you later.
Little did I know,
That was the last bye
From you
The last bye you would say
With love in your voice
And in your heart.
I still say bye with love in my voice
but now it is not to you
Tonight
Unlike any other
We sat on the hood of my car
And stared at the beautiful stars
A simple kiss here and there
But it wasn’t anything more
He wouldn’t dare
Kisses, cuddles, laughing and stories
You remind me
Who it is to be Zoie
From elementary school
Middle school
High school
And beyond
You have always been
My favorite song
I’ve come to the conclusion
If you don’t love me for me
It isn’t meant to be
I know, I have, doubted, our lo-ve.
And with, that strike, you've cut, your chest wide open.
I didn't realize, I'd suffer your demise.
Before, our split, my hopes, your lies.
Never once, think that, I have, misspoken.
What we once had, you and I, you and me, has broken.
I, fell ill, bad case of weak sense of will.
Because, you erased, all that I experienced.
So goodbye, don't ever say, I didn't let you fly.
In the old grand Cathedral
Down by the City Hall
Across the buzzing lively street
The place where we'd meet
Birds chirping signifying the new day...
My new dawn with you
Until the break of dawn...
Then balloons, --big white balloons across the sky...
A magnificent view
In the shimmering glistening sun,
the cooling breezy wind,
The crisp autumn air...
Laughters and cheer,
--those wedding bells!
Do you hear those beautiful tower bells?...
My billowing gown...
And doves, --doves flapping their wings...! Up and beyond,
gazing to the future...
...
I wish we're getting married today...
...
But we're not,...
You left me months ago...
and now my mind draws blank,
for another one to fill,
an empty space where your arm used to link mine,
as how we should've walk...
... the aisle, ...
under the stares of our beloved...
And you're not coming back, I know...
Stilll I wish, I wish, that were getting married today...
It's not the promise you break,
but it's my heart and soul you do break...
They say what belongs to you would find its own way back to you,
eventually, somehow...
Only they know...
You threw me once,
did you expect me to come back to you?...
....
So I let you go once,
would you ever find your way back to me?
Were you testing me? Somehow...
Were you testing our fates...
the one you held within your palms...?
I can't help but pondered...
If come back this time, would we fall on the same ground?...
Or will we break when we're collided?...
Only they know...
Only those who've known would know...
Heard you're with someone new now...
I should've known,... I should've known...
You'd never left your heart cool for so long...
In the name of avoiding loneliness, avoiding the longing...
Had always been a fling,
but this time would it be your eternal song?
Or just another song?...
I dare not to ask, I wouldn't want to know...
Only my fool would believe you're still my one and only, my own...
...
And so I've been told...
And so I'll keep my heart cold...
'Cause it's the only one I can hold,
my pride and dignity...
The only key to my sanity...
...
maybe one day
i won't get so scared that
i might fall for you again
every time i see you
after so long.
maybe all i'll see in you
is the ghost of that love
that i've generously gave you;
all the feelings i had
buried six feet under;
and my love letters
left on the surface like a gravestone
with every beautiful word
i ever wrote for you engraved on it;
the last tangible proof
of what existed
and is long gone from the confines of my soul.
oh how i would mourn
for what i have lost,
oh how i would be stronger by then
to be able to see you again
without my longing,
to be able to smile
at the boy who murdered my heart.
I'm craving you once again.
The sad part is, you're probably with her right now.
She has you under some kind of spell.
The way you love her and wish she would change is the way that I love you and wish you would change.
The way you care about her and want too protect her .... is how I am towards you.
I fixed your poor broken heart, and you promised me you'd never go back. That she was bad , and that your year long relationship with her was toxic.
It is now time for me to see how toxic you were for me.
The thing is I gave you the benefit of the doubt. I let you in all the way , maybe to soon and maybe to easy.
I let you become that kept me sane.So as soon as you left. I lost my mind and I can only think of you and everytime I hear your name I Scream.I have never had so much hate in my heart for someone. I've never wished death upon anyone, but you, oh god I hope you burn in hell. I hope you feel like crap when she tells you what she told me when I confronted her about your lies.
She made me see why you two go well together, you both lie. You both hate what you are and what you aren't. I now see what you meant by toxic.
I can't wait for you to crawl back to me.
I won't be there. Just how you never were.
Goodbye Javier. I no longer see the good in you. That is how it always should have been.
Your smell particles,
the
air
I breathe
The drug I need,
endorphin I need
I think I just miss your presence,
How you said you loved me,
your warmth,
your kind gentleness,
the consciousness that you're there, ...
-- Even though not in person ...
Silence answered me, ...
Nothingness whispered he's here...
A sole hero against the desert scorching sun
The roses you gave me had withered and died...--
Like how you felt towards me...
To be nurtured and then cut off to whiter and dry ...
Your unspoken words behind your tightly clasped lips
The embers in your eyes betrayed you, my dear ...
Cold
As
snow,
Not as pure
Murky as ridden by dirt...
-- You are another trinket
I close the chest of your shadow
Never cut your wings
There of you go, off with the stream,...
... cascading into nothingness ...