hi
its me
in a few weeks, or months, or years,
I hope you wont recognize me.
I hope when you look back,
You'll think, "Wow,
Id have to swim across every ocean to get back to where I was."
I hope youll have watered your wilting dreams,
Giving life to what you should know you deserve.
I hope you will know that even if your heart hurts,
Its only temporary like the pitter patter of raindrops.
I hope that when you feel like no one understands,
You remember that your feelings are still as real as a rainbow.
I hope that every time a wave grasps you under,
You reach for the light just like a sunflower.
I hope you can leap across those unsteady cliffs,  
And finally see what hides beneath the ledge.
I hope that when the sun makes its way under the horizon,
And you let your eyes fall closed,
You're just you.

I miss knowing the words,
To put from mind to mouth,
Or pen to paper.
These day the words get lost in my head,
On the road to becoming a whole thought or idea,
And I can never seem to find the wreckage of the crash.
As if they all just disappeared,
And all the words swirling around my head,
Were never truly meant to be known.

Meet me at midnight
Flowers in hand
Moon casting shadows
On the ground where we stand
Two lonely humans
Holding on by a strand
Torn but not broken
Holding my hand

theres a switch
inside of this body
i call my own.
it flips so easy
turns the lights out so fast,
too fast.
cant control it
cant reach it.
just have to let the ache settle
deep inside my bones.
wait it out
wait for it to leave.
knowing itll be back so soon,
too soon.

Let my hands be the pages
That hold your unspoken words
Let my voice be the letters
That refills the pages once burned

Every time this happens,
I wonder
If its a pattern that will ever break,
Or if maybe I should just
Give up?
Its not like anyone cares,
That Im trying.

I should feel the sting of betrayal
Maybe later, I will.
But for now,
All I wonder is
How did I let myself believe it?
A strong friendship, so fast
Can never last.
Not for me,
Anyway.

I thought you just had
Ups and lows.
When you could make me smile
And laugh
And feel wanted.
And when you could make me question
Why I was even here.
Holding back tears
Id never let fall.

I wanted to understand you
In a way no one ever could for me.
I thought we were strong,
That we would last.
But I barely held on for 8 months.
And you?
I dont even know when you let go,
Because I never saw the ties between us fall
In the first place.

Ive given up on you now.
At least,
Im trying to.
Its hard
When someone makes you feel
Like youre on the verge of okay.
Even though you arent.
But they can also push you off the ledge
And watch you dangle.

I thought you had love for me.
And you might.
But what is love,
If it is not shown.
I cant just be loved.
I need to feel it.

My faith in you,
Has not all been drained.
If only I could tell you all this.
And make you understand.
But I cant risk
Your icy, yet burning heart,
Leaving a deeper hole in mine.

I wish you would know,
That it still leaves a small crack in me.
That I couldnt see you,
All of you.
I wanted to
I really did.
But even though,
The things that hurt me were small,
They mattered.
They really did.

Youre in good hands.
I hope if Im right about you
Being misunderstood,
Like me,
You find someone.
If you havent already.

Unlike me,
This wont end with pain for you.
At least,
I dont think so.
I was not significant in your heart,
Like you were in mine.

I dont feel the sting of betrayal yet.
Later, I will.
But for now,
All I wonder is
Why did I open up heart again and
Believe?
A strong friendship, so fast
Can never last.
It never did for me,
Anyway.

Its nothing,
I know.
But its too much,
Though I wont show.
Inside,
Im butterflies swirling in a storm.
Outside,
Only visible are the fake smiles my lips form.
Help me,
But I dont know how.
Leave me,
Its nothing new now.

You know the girl who always says shes fine,
Even though no one really asks.
Whos at your side, after you have left hers.
The one who wont, cant, even gently step on your heart,
When you are shattering hers.
Shes not okay.
She hasnt been, for a long, long time.

It’s like the only time I can see outside of this hole
Is when I’m trying to make sure others don’t see
That I’m digging it deeper
And
Deeper
And
Deeper
And falling
Further
And
Further
And
Further
Until I can’t get out

At least these drops of water are falling all around me,
Instead of from me.

How do you find yourself,
When every part of you thats lost,
Might have never even been there to begin with?

A reminder,
that even those of us who soar above the rest,
can sometimes fall to the ground,
in a drop of full of pain.

I see everything.
And yet,
I still feel blind.

Tomorrow,
I will be
a little bit bolder.
Spread my wings and fly.

Tomorrow,
I will be
a little bit stronger.
Soaring through the endless sky.

Tomorrow,
I will be
truer to who I really am.
Broken and bent, but beautiful.
No longer a lie.

away from me,
like they always do.

this gloomy,
sunshine.
these cloudy,
rays.
the softness in,
these Fall days.

"Youre forgetting."
My mind tells my heart,
when the petals wont stop falling.
"It takes time for the season to come,
And the flower to bloom."

Every moment of silence,
Is stolen by you.
In my mind,
You are always there.
In reality,
Life isnt that fair.
Someday in the future,
No clue when or where.
Ill know you like nobody,
Till the end, I swear.

Its not going to **** you,
Just leave it alone.

Shes breaking inside,
Leaving behind shattered fragments of who she used to be.
Hes lost but following,
A trail of something deep with no end that he can see.
Hes closing in on her,
As is her fear.
But she lead him to a destination,
Without knowing it is here.
And now he has arrived,
With the piece
That will transform them
Into a masterpiece.

Fly with her
As your eyes linger on her smile

It touches you deep
And you let it soar through you

Hold her at the breaking point
But she wont let you over

And your love will leave
An endless ray in her shine

Youre steady base,
Keeps my off beat rhythm
In tune.

Dont answer, "Youre different."
Because we ALL are.
That doesnt make me special,
Does it?

Just because you dont see any effort,
Doesnt mean its not there.

Nothing is impossible
Except silencing the chaos inside my mind,
Apparently.

Am I overfilled with emptiness...?

Sometimes a paper lies in front of you
And a pen sits still in your hand
But the only thing on the paper
Are wet drops of tears
Falling from the heart

These lies,
Are what keep me from falling.

But these lies,
Might also break me.

Lonely thoughts always find a place in my mind

Your actions
Are like a bold pen.
Never erasable.
Always visible.

My first true love...
We met through lies
I went on a date,
To my very own surprise

My first true love
We had flirted times before
Nothing serious
Of that I thought I was sure

My first true love
Didnt occupy a thought in my mind
For I didnt see
He was exactly my kind

My first true love
Helped the real me outside
And loved me forever
Even as the fake me died

I want to know,
If I let go of everything.
Who would be scarred?

Well, what did I expect?

And when you reach a crossroad
Dont look back.

Interesting how,
They say to stop daydreaming
Stop imagining and living in your fantasies,
When those are the only things
That have given me the courage and hope
To get where I am now
And stay here

I want to scream
At the little things
That stop me
From being near
Those that I love

To like someone
Means your feelings can go deeper
To love someone
Means your feelings have reached the limit
If not passed them

The first sip they say
Takes your breath away
And so it did
As I lifted the lid
Again to my smiling lips
The liquid falls and drips
But my mind is elsewhere
Thinking of a moment I share
With only you
Just us two

I thought no one could take away the lonely...
That it followed you like your shadow,
When the sun is up.
That it aged like time,
Endlessly.
Looks like I was right...

I. Love. You.
Three words,
I never knew could mean so much...
But only when spoken to you.

The place where reality and hope cross paths

Today is the day
Guess I might as well write this
Happy Haiku Day

The words I could never say
Fall as silent tears now
By tomorrow theyll be forgotten
But I can only escape them for so long

The forbidden words,
Never to be spoken aloud
Tumbled out of my mouth
From the moment we met
And I let them.

The most intimate thing you can ask a poet,
Is the meaning behind their poems...

They say the fastest thing in the world is light
Then how come you are never in my sight?
I cant help but beg you to please slow down
But when I finish, youre already out of town
I cant even tell, as you slip right by
Thats how it'll be, 'till the day I die

Living life with no regrets,
Isnt about not regretting what you do
Its about striving not to do anything regretful

I didnt understand
Didnt know
I was broken
Because Ive never known
What it means to be whole