Talking to the darkest hour
Waiting for the sun to rise
I was fragile last weekend,
I witnessed some dark stuff:
Dried blood covered the floor
of every room in his house,
I struggle in this land, powerless.
We feel hurt, suffer pain, do damage unto ourselves, and for what?
Were it etched into us, onto us; visible.
I fear my ability to intervene is limited.
There is misery here, I cannot handle it
as it was once as familiar to me, and loss
I would do well to take leave of this environ
before it ensnares another year I cannot spare.
I hear that forgotten calling
my name mispronounced.
I meditate in my poison garden,
Praying for an ounce of clarity
among the many intoxicants;
Spare me the sorcery.
burned me with a stick today,
smelled like smoky ribs
on a lovely sunday morning pan.
the pain on the pan
sizzled the other pain away.
as I fancy the most.
The places we cherish
The moments in those
The people we share it
Who's doors are never close.
The horizon is what we choose
It could be a mile it could be a pool
Bringing light into darkness
Can be one's greatest tool
Sailing has never been easy
The wind takes its share
Being steady in all weathers
Is a drift so fair and rare.
the things i never said
running circles in my head
wanting to throw them at you
shove them into your brain too
i try to dance it out
dance and laugh and shout
scream loud hoping you will hear
but you just hide out of fear
obsessed with your brown eyes
that make up the center of your disguise
come dance with me
dance with joy and ease and glee
those thoughts that make me so alive
take them for a drive
like we used to go
putting on our perfect show
so sick of denying
all the frustrated crying
just keep me steady
until i'm ready
(to let go)
"I need you", you said,
"Without you, I’d be dead."
I locked my eyes into yours with a gaze steady.
I said, "If you can’t live without me,
why aren’t you dead already?"
don't lie to me
Walk with me
Keep me steady
You're the one who convinced me I was ready
"I brought you here for the proper hour,
Don't be caught up by the illusion of power."
i'm drowning in my own thoughts
no one can hear me screaming silently
i'm trapped inside with no way to the surface
my whole body feels as heavy as the whole world
why did i shut down?
i don't want this anymore
i don't want to live like this
with my chest feeling so heavy
with my breath being not steady
When you get bored
I won't blame you for it
Instead I'll remind you of what once made you sure
Into the evening dusk
The steady beat of the trumpets ring about
As I gaze up upon the stars
I'll wish for you
While they hurry down from the sky
Though, I know
You'll never be mine.
An ode to the one who I know will never see me as more than a friend.