You stand out
like a fruit loop
in a bowl
of cheerios

This time,
I wore
a parachute
before
I jumped
off the
edge
of
fa
ll
in
g

My paper
ached to feel stories of you
on its pages

yearned to taste the adventures
you had with my heart with every
curve of a letter

and craved to vicariously
enjoy the pressures of pleasures
on it's blank slate
every time
you trace bedtimes
stories up and
down my spine

For the "you"
not the one you wear to work
but the one that looks lovely
at first morning sight

For the "you"
not the one you cover so immensely
with scarves and jackets
but the one that dances in their underwear
on a lazy Saturday

For the "you"
not the one that wears the glasses
of work ethics
but the one whose fire
is wild enough, it makes wildfires dim in jealousy

For the "you"
not the one that ferments in silence
but the one that screams sultry verbatim
now and then that surprises
all those around

For the "you"
not the one that nestles in sobriety
from 9 to 5
but the one that ******* to the first taste of alcohol

For the "you"
not the one that's under construction
under the umbrella of perfection
but the one
that flaunts those flaws
on that runway
so seductively
it makes
perfection
curl in
envy

I always say
it'll change
but the morning
will never be a sunset

My he(a)rt
(m)elts
at the
s(i)ght
of su(c)h (a)
(b)eautifu(l)
lif(e)

I sold my soul
to poetry
because the devil
rejected it
he told me
"it's too fiery for hell
it'll do better
melting hearts"

I feel like
I have lost
the battle
in a one-warrior
war

I breathe
I see
I feel
I yawn
I am alive

I shake
I stress
I moan
I grunt
I am here

I believe
I cry
I touch
I react
I am fine

I caress
I claw
I spank
I bite
I shake
I am ecstatic

I rest
I dance
I walk
I strut
I even run
I am healthy

I drink
I smoke
I talk
I hug
I like
I love
I am still here

I speed
I lash out
I headbang
I folk dance
I hold your hand

I fall
I stand
I tip toe
I walk in circles
I slide

I glance
I enjoy
I fight
I sit back
I sacrifice
I befriend
I help
I think

I write
I sing
I narrate
I block
I break
I create

I am blessed

I took your hand in mine
and walked down the streets
of tiled memories
yet to be carved

I stole your cigarette
from between your fingers
just like you stole my feelings
without noticing

I lit it in the passenger seat
next to you, just like the way
your eyes light up when they fall
upon my sight

I looked at you, next to me
and mentally snapped moments
without you noticing

I took a drag from your cigarette
the same way I take your breath away
when you kiss me

I filled my lungs with sinful smoke
the same way I fill your mind with wicked
thoughts of me

I exhaled fumes of sighs
the same way you do when I embrace
you for a while

I rolled down my window
and felt liberated, like you do
when you lie there on my bed
with a smile on  your face

I put my hand out
to dance with speed, feeling the wind
caress my hand like you do
when you want to comfort me

I took a sip from that cheap can of alcohol
and smiled, it was cold and sweet
just like your skin, when you sleep next to me
in winter

I felt sedated, borderline drunk
just like you when I lay my skin
on  yours overdosing you with heaven on earth

I rested my head on the seat
and marveled at the night sky
wondering how such simple beauty
can be so mesmerizing
the same way you marvel
at my eyes,
when they wake up
and
light your
dawn

I never knew
what it felt like
being loved
the way I love
until
I fell
for myself
through
the looking glass

I grab my pencil
everyday

Shaky hands
bring down the lead tip
barely touching the paper
in anticipation
of inspiration

Bombs explode outside  
clouding the sky

I call my muses
to work
but
they fail to clock in
because
the road between
the heart and the mind
has been
bombed

You were
the most
colorful

but your
flavour
was short
lived

"unwraps another"

An encounter
that shook the stars
made them shoot across
the sky, urging lovers
to throw wishes
here and there
with no hope in mind

She time-traveled at  his "hello"
he shook at her reply
what happened to the cosmos?
could they have re-arranged?
what magical power took over the Earth
to make gravity none-existent?

She felt weightless
but heavy with her past
he sweat out all his mistakes
or was his body too close to her sun
that he melted at her sight

He wanted to speak almanacs of his years past
but choked at the dense night sky
his lungs shrunk in capacity
his mind forgot the ability to verbalize
vocalize,
his mind forgot all sense of language
except that of none-verbal nature

She wanted to strangle him
with the chains that left marks on her heart
the wounds that she turned to beautiful tattoos
the pickled emotions she had left on that shelf
in a desolate basement
She wanted to give him a taste
of what "hurt" felt like back then
and how it morphed her into a beautiful
thick skinned creature, fearless of rollercoasters
who's highs are intoxicating and who's lows
are deadly
But..

He...
Her...
Hell visited Earth that day
all its fires burned all sense of logic
turned emotions to ashes
it anesthetized what drives the heart
into overdrive

The universe confused its laws of physics
gravity lost, oxygen reduced, weightlessness ruled
everyone was high

Something was wrong
it didn't feel like it was happening
She had her taste of inception
a dream within a dream within
a mind diluted with nothing but sobriety
how could this be?
He was speaking in intervals
cut with silences that caused earthquakes in meaning
intercepted with glares that burned the wildest of wild fires  

Life you threw one hell of a curveball
that changed the orbit of her being
Turning her the other way
slowing down time
or so it felt

What the hell is happening
She has this under control
When her schizophrenic selves
came out to play
they failed miserably
She gawked at
his jittery hands
eyes
dilated with confusion
glazed with hesitation
filled with questions


surreal
ethereal
not happening
pinch me
Please

It was the base of all
It had rules and guidelines
and ****** it had time out's
and should's and must's

It was the quarter
that molded the center of you
that gave you that armor
that shield
and most importantly
that helmet

Sometimes there was war
and the walls shook from the screams
and other moments, the warmth melted
the hostility within

It held as many members as it could
and sometimes it magically expanded
as the people grew more and more

You left it for long periods of time
you thought you'd enjoy the liberty
from those guidelines and such
and you did

But at the end of the day
you will always know
the road back
like the back of your hand

You will always
find your
way
home

The fo(u)nder of fondness
lies in ^

Time
play
nice

If thoughts can
meet half way across
the ocean
and tornado a whirlpool
of the unspoken
King Triton would
be threatened
by the intensity
of human
expression

I saw her under a different light
it bounced off of her pale white skin
delicate and porcelain like

I saw her under the blatant sunshine
it gilded her hair, turning her into a goddess
of beauty
full of mystique

I saw her under the silver stars
glow
on her sleeping eyes
showing me the woman within

I saw her under the dimming lights
of the bar, swaying her hair
carelessly, becoming one
with the music

I saw her under the sheets
of instincts
when her whole body
mounted me with confidence
telling me
"it's different"

that's when I saw her
she transcended from under a different light
to a different
world
my kind of
world

You know
you're aging
when silence
becomes a major
part
of your
presence

If he would let me
I’d marvel at your ebony hair
falling weightlessly
down your tired shoulders
Oh, how it kills me with jealousy

If he would let me
I’d run my fingers through them
finding comfort in its thickness
creating paths of discovery

If he would let me
I’d sit for hours marveling
at those hazel eyes, very dark hazel eyes
trying to dissect their histories
stories and even their romances

If he would let me
I’d embrace you
tightly, till my heart speaks with yours
in beats in sync

If he would let me
I’d hold your hand
and feel the rush of a 16 year old
high on butterflies and blushes

If he would let me
I’d kiss those wine red lips
and get drunk off of their toxicity
**** sobriety at this point

If he would let me
I’d lie on the hood of my car
under the stars, with you
listening to you foretelling
a vague future of fame and glory

If he would let me
I’d paint a portrait of ultimate beauty
with my fingertips
on your freckled skin
that’ll drive Aphrodite mad

If he would let me
I’ll stay high of off your laughter
enjoying the lightness of joy
all day, everyday

If he would let me
I’d go forth and give you it
but every time
I reach inside my rib cage
to grab it
it pulls back
and protrudes thorns

Oh dear heart
why have you sedated your being
I do miss me some adrenaline?
Why won’t you let me?

“I have heard many pumps you idiot
but none like mine
you think I like being prozac-ked
by your silly fear?

Oh dear you are a fool indeed”

You blow my rationale
like the angry wind
stripping me
from logic

You step into my garden
of innocence
coloring my dull being
with every footprint

You awaken my dormant nature
blossoming every flower
sprinkling spring
everywhere

You kiss my hibernating heart
warming it from the crisp
cold winter outside

You ripple emotions
across my vast body
triggering a field
of goosebumps

You walk your fingers
untangling my curls
as they stroll from my nape
upwards

You trace paths
along my face
drawing a perfect picture
of beauty
your
beauty

I have been long gone
I kept my memories
in a suitcase
preserved like fossils
in the museum of my room
but I will carry them with me
as I stumble on the
next thing
that falls in front of me

I have had mistakes
that tried to knock
on the walls of my mind
but it's about time
my brain learns
from practice
over and over
not to fall for their emotions
but to know how to cope with them

I have had moments
that tattooed smiles
on every neuron
creating memories
of moments
that I seek sanctuary in
whenever I find the need to

I have had the idea of change
marinating in me
almost forcing me to believe it
to live it, to breathe
then...

I have had you to look
into my eyes
sometime later
telling me to
"stop faking it
it's always
been you"

He played
with her hair
and poetry
untangled
every
"not"

One day
it all started out differently
from the way the sun rose
to the walk to work

One day my hair was at its worst
my skin was frosty
and my nose flaky

One day I had no music
on my stroll
and no money in my wallet

One day lunch was late
my stomach was growling
my inspiration was dim
and my nails bitten

One day I walked
into my office to a meeting
the heater was broken

I started writing
my pencil broke

then there was a
"hello"
that erased
all
that

She spoke of dreams
and chasing shooting stars
under galactic blankets
that covered them warm...

He kissed her quiet
"Shhh darlin'
you're doing it again..
you're reading my
thoughts"

The shutters
                      let
                       in
                        l
                       i
                      n
                     e
                    s
                    o
                      f
                        l
                         i
                          g
                           h
                            t
                            t
                             o
                              t
                              r
                              a
                              c
                             e
                            y
                           o
                          u
                           r
                           o
                            w
                              n
                               p
                                o
                                 e
                                  m

The day
you make a decision
that convinces
every cell in your body
is the day darling
you defy gravity
and walk
on clouds of
content

Find what you can't express
and pin it down in words

Find what you can't see
and fabricate it in fantasies

Find what you can't feel
and embody it in adventures

Find what you can't speak
and let your eyes vocalize

Find what you "can't"
and challenge yourself

Find what you "never"
and take it a step further

She left her beauty
in the shade
preserved for those
who dare
walk into her darkness

She left her other self
in the shade
covered by the innocence
whose scent seduces those
bewitched by
the beauty of a rose

Shrug it off darling,
all birds
need to fly
some know
their way back
others
find new ones..

Shrug it off..
some birds might
stay and dance
with every
shrug..

The raindrops
that slide on glass windows
remind me of your tears
pure and intense
uncontrolled and dense
as they strolled down your rosey cheeks
when you told me
you love me
under the sheets

My dreams left remnants
in the corners of my mind
slowly turning to dust
as the light of dawn
slithers through
my brain
each and
every
morning

Have I lost the touch
to fantasise
sober?

T(he)
Truth
About
(L)ies
in
(L)ines
Beneath
the Earth

Send n(you)des
Send (new)des

The curse of a writer is that
every word jotted down
is a reflection of every beat
the heart ripples through the body
that harnesses waves upon waves
of emotions from here and there
and the best part is that you will find
yourself there too
no matter who you are.

They want to escape, they cannot
but find a way to embrace the subject
of the matter with words that morph
stanzas into finger pointing
comments that strum your chords
and wait for the echo to die out
with the last period
on the last line.

Someone told me
"love looks at decent
ones "

I nodded, sighed, and smirked
but love
made me
like
this

Unleashed my curls
broke my walls
shattered
my people-pleasing
sharpened my poetry
silenced my loud voice
widened my eyes
encouraged my heart
undressed my façade
made me dance naked
in the face of judgement,
sing the songs of truth
and fall in love with
all things wrong
right, left, ugly, beautiful
and gave strength
to the choice that
always stood in the back
but now takes center stage

"Love left me right",
"Love leaving, made me write"
I replied

And then I heard
her heart
through
the screams
that trickled
down her cheeks

She speaks...

I excel
at the sport
of
fal
(in love)
ling

Picking hearts
is like picking fruits
we like them, ripe
supple and oh so sweet

Truth knocked on my heart
it hurt to hear its noise
I knew if I opened
I would never
be the same
again

A resting pencil
insinuates a dying
poet

Forgive me
I have decided
to forgive
myself
this
time