My he(a)rt
(m)elts
at the
s(i)ght
of su(c)h (a)
(b)eautifu(l)
lif(e)

For the "you"
not the one you wear to work
but the one that looks lovely
at first morning sight

For the "you"
not the one you cover so immensely
with scarves and jackets
but the one that dances in their underwear
on a lazy Saturday

For the "you"
not the one that wears the glasses
of work ethics
but the one whose fire
is wild enough, it makes wildfires dim in jealousy

For the "you"
not the one that ferments in silence
but the one that screams sultry verbatim
now and then that surprises
all those around

For the "you"
not the one that nestles in sobriety
from 9 to 5
but the one that ******* to the first taste of alcohol

For the "you"
not the one that's under construction
under the umbrella of perfection
but the one
that flaunts those flaws
on that runway
so seductively
it makes
perfection
curl in
envy

The fo(u)nder of fondness
lies in ^

You blow my rationale
like the angry wind
stripping me
from logic

You step into my garden
of innocence
coloring my dull being
with every footprint

You awaken my dormant nature
blossoming every flower
sprinkling spring
everywhere

You kiss my hibernating heart
warming it from the crisp
cold winter outside

You ripple emotions
across my vast body
triggering a field
of goosebumps

You walk your fingers
untangling my curls
as they stroll from my nape
upwards

You trace paths
along my face
drawing a perfect picture
of beauty
your
beauty

I always say
it'll change
but the morning
will never be a sunset

If he would let me
I’d marvel at your ebony hair
falling weightlessly
down your tired shoulders
Oh, how it kills me with jealousy

If he would let me
I’d run my fingers through them
finding comfort in its thickness
creating paths of discovery

If he would let me
I’d sit for hours marveling
at those hazel eyes, very dark hazel eyes
trying to dissect their histories
stories and even their romances

If he would let me
I’d embrace you
tightly, till my heart speaks with yours
in beats in sync

If he would let me
I’d hold your hand
and feel the rush of a 16 year old
high on butterflies and blushes

If he would let me
I’d kiss those wine red lips
and get drunk off of their toxicity
**** sobriety at this point

If he would let me
I’d lie on the hood of my car
under the stars, with you
listening to you foretelling
a vague future of fame and glory

If he would let me
I’d paint a portrait of ultimate beauty
with my fingertips
on your freckled skin
that’ll drive Aphrodite mad

If he would let me
I’ll stay high of off your laughter
enjoying the lightness of joy
all day, everyday

If he would let me
I’d go forth and give you it
but every time
I reach inside my rib cage
to grab it
it pulls back
and protrudes thorns

Oh dear heart
why have you sedated your being
I do miss me some adrenaline?
Why won’t you let me?

“I have heard many pumps you idiot
but none like mine
you think I like being prozac-ked
by your silly fear?

Oh dear you are a fool indeed”

One day
it all started out differently
from the way the sun rose
to the walk to work

One day my hair was at its worst
my skin was frosty
and my nose flaky

One day I had no music
on my stroll
and no money in my wallet

One day lunch was late
my stomach was growling
my inspiration was dim
and my nails bitten

One day I walked
into my office to a meeting
the heater was broken

I started writing
my pencil broke

then there was a
"hello"
that erased
all
that

I never knew
what it felt like
being loved
the way I love
until
I fell
for myself
through
the looking glass

This time,
I wore
a parachute
before
I jumped
off the
edge
of
fa
ll
in
g

I sold my soul
to poetry
because the devil
rejected it
he told me
"it's too fiery for hell
it'll do better
melting hearts"

I have been long gone
I kept my memories
in a suitcase
preserved like fossils
in the museum of my room
but I will carry them with me
as I stumble on the
next thing
that falls in front of me

I have had mistakes
that tried to knock
on the walls of my mind
but it's about time
my brain learns
from practice
over and over
not to fall for their emotions
but to know how to cope with them

I have had moments
that tattooed smiles
on every neuron
creating memories
of moments
that I seek sanctuary in
whenever I find the need to

I have had the idea of change
marinating in me
almost forcing me to believe it
to live it, to breathe
then...

I have had you to look
into my eyes
sometime later
telling me to
"stop faking it
it's always
been you"

Find what you can't express
and pin it down in words

Find what you can't see
and fabricate it in fantasies

Find what you can't feel
and embody it in adventures

Find what you can't speak
and let your eyes vocalize

Find what you "can't"
and challenge yourself

Find what you "never"
and take it a step further

The day
you make a decision
that convinces
every cell in your body
is the day darling
you defy gravity
and walk
on clouds of
content

She spoke of dreams
and chasing shooting stars
under galactic blankets
that covered them warm...

He kissed her quiet
"Shhh darlin'
you're doing it again..
you're reading my
thoughts"

It was the base of all
It had rules and guidelines
and ****** it had time out's
and should's and must's

It was the quarter
that molded the center of you
that gave you that armor
that shield
and most importantly
that helmet

Sometimes there was war
and the walls shook from the screams
and other moments, the warmth melted
the hostility within

It held as many members as it could
and sometimes it magically expanded
as the people grew more and more

You left it for long periods of time
you thought you'd enjoy the liberty
from those guidelines and such
and you did

But at the end of the day
you will always know
the road back
like the back of your hand

You will always
find your
way
home

The raindrops
that slide on glass windows
remind me of your tears
pure and intense
uncontrolled and dense
as they strolled down your rosey cheeks
when you told me
you love me
under the sheets

If thoughts can
meet half way across
the ocean
and tornado a whirlpool
of the unspoken
King Triton would
be threatened
by the intensity
of human
expression

I grab my pencil
everyday

Shaky hands
bring down the lead tip
barely touching the paper
in anticipation
of inspiration

Bombs explode outside  
clouding the sky

I call my muses
to work
but
they fail to clock in
because
the road between
the heart and the mind
has been
bombed

Have I lost the touch
to fantasise
sober?

She left her beauty
in the shade
preserved for those
who dare
walk into her darkness

She left her other self
in the shade
covered by the innocence
whose scent seduces those
bewitched by
the beauty of a rose

T(he)
Truth
About
(L)ies
in
(L)ines
Beneath
the Earth

I saw her under a different light
it bounced off of her pale white skin
delicate and porcelain like

I saw her under the blatant sunshine
it gilded her hair, turning her into a goddess
of beauty
full of mystique

I saw her under the silver stars
glow
on her sleeping eyes
showing me the woman within

I saw her under the dimming lights
of the bar, swaying her hair
carelessly, becoming one
with the music

I saw her under the sheets
of instincts
when her whole body
mounted me with confidence
telling me
"it's different"

that's when I saw her
she transcended from under a different light
to a different
world
my kind of
world

The curse of a writer is that
every word jotted down
is a reflection of every beat
the heart ripples through the body
that harnesses waves upon waves
of emotions from here and there
and the best part is that you will find
yourself there too
no matter who you are.

They want to escape, they cannot
but find a way to embrace the subject
of the matter with words that morph
stanzas into finger pointing
comments that strum your chords
and wait for the echo to die out
with the last period
on the last line.

You know
you're aging
when silence
becomes a major
part
of your
presence

I excel
at the sport
of
fal
(in love)
ling

Someone told me
"love looks at decent
ones "

I nodded, sighed, and smirked
but love
made me
like
this

Unleashed my curls
broke my walls
shattered
my people-pleasing
sharpened my poetry
silenced my loud voice
widened my eyes
encouraged my heart
undressed my façade
made me dance naked
in the face of judgement,
sing the songs of truth
and fall in love with
all things wrong
right, left, ugly, beautiful
and gave strength
to the choice that
always stood in the back
but now takes center stage

"Love left me right",
"Love leaving, made me write"
I replied

Picking hearts
is like picking fruits
we like them, ripe
supple and oh so sweet

My dreams left remnants
in the corners of my mind
slowly turning to dust
as the light of dawn
slithers through
my brain
each and
every
morning

I found sanctuary
in every line I wrote
for my tongue
cringed at the mere
thought of saying it

I found peace in every
pencil stroke that created a word
too heavy for my heart to carry

I found serenity
in the sound of turning pages
as they filled with stanzas
stories and random ideas
that my voice could not voice

I found strength
in every time I held
that blank page from turning
and seeing the unwritten
through my mind's eye
creating itself

I found uniqueness
in the way I integrated
"what I could not say"
with
"what I can write"

I found a way
to embody memories
and bring them to life
every time the tip of my pencil
touches that blank slate

I found a way to talk to you
and word *****
things I'd never imagine
my mouth would utter

At least I found a
a way!!

You stared at me
and made me feel
like I belong
in the night sky
and I made you
feel like my moon
but darling
when you blinked
the sun came out
and I was gone

Forgive me
I have decided
to forgive
myself
this
time

Shrug it off darling,
all birds
need to fly
some know
their way back
others
find new ones..

Shrug it off..
some birds might
stay and dance
with every
shrug..

Face to Face
nose to nose
jousting breaths
teasing
every sense
in their bodies

Lips close but not
quite, so much to say
yet silence inhibited
all sense of speech

His hands
slid sensually up and down
her spine
strumming seductive moans
she was his cello
and he, her cellist
conducting a symphony
that she
and only she
can excel at

Jousting breaths
high moans
tender touches
skin on skin
it's just
ethereal

Catch me before
the cusp of dawn
and I'll show you
how I can
blur the lines
between your dreams
and my reality
and make
your days
a living fantasy

I overdosed on my cupid's arrow
I trip and fall
at that first
different
"hello"

A resting pencil
insinuates a dying
poet

I stood
on the stone
of sturdiness
only
to find myself
far away from
stability
and simply
balancing

I heard this song once
trumpets of adrenaline
and beats of joy
combined to shoot my heart
with the best drug
my body has ever tasted

I heard this song once
it was 1 am, with drums
of elation mixed with decadent vibrations
my eyes couldn't handle it
they cried with joy

I heard this song once
in the back seat of a car
my limbs awakened
with movements reaching
higher for something better

I heard this song once
with drops of emotions
repeating, beating, dropping
with ineffable beauty
that words went silent

I heard this song once
my whole being shook
to the sound
that music can gift
and
my soul
moaned
with
pleasure

Blah, I just want to eat your brain
and experience
what's it like to think with
your thoughts
feel with your feelings
and see with your sight

Grrr, I want to kiss with your tongue
and feel hers, warm and ***** flavored
with a hint of cranberry
Yum, I can already taste it baby

Breathes, I want to exhale
smoke with your lungs
tinted and abused,
over used yet they never
refused working

******, I want to grab her waist
with your arms
and slide them down to her hip bones
and sway her with those beats
that she loves so freaking much

Oh, I want to mess her hair
with your fingers and feel every strand
as it leaves the tips of them
magically numb

Gahd, I want to see through your eyes
and paint my very own masterpiece of her
see what you see, and see it well
"Hey", I want to vocalize
all that's in my mind
and lull her to my arms

He played
with her hair
and poetry
untangled
every
"not"

I used to look
now I see

I used to crush
now I love

I used to hug
now I embrace

I used to rage
now I engage

I used to jump to conclude
now I skate to it
taking my
time

I used to fall in
now I rise to
taking you
with me

I used to blush
and
I still
do

Truth knocked on my heart
it hurt to hear its noise
I knew if I opened
I would never
be the same
again

It drives me mad
this tornado inside
vibrating my heart
palpitating my breaths

It dwindles my body
to a state of trance
within a trance
within a trance

My eyes close
my mouth smiles
have I truly gone mad?

A song plays
it's the soundtrack to my hazy daydreams
the ones that are so good
you could feel them again
you get light-headed
you get dizzy
oh day-dreams, little shots of sweet escapes

My eyes drift
beyond the obvious or even through them
wait, have I been drugged?
My body is feeble, the tornadoes
caused a mess, even Mary Poppins and her perks couldn't fix

Sleepless nights
drowsy days
what a mess indeed
sober work days
intoxicated nights
yet that stupid smile
those silly day dreams
Darling, I think
I have really gone Mad