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750 · Sep 2022
sudden loss
Strying Sep 2022
where you laid looks like a crime scene now
the pulled blanket
the crooked pillow
the emptiness,

and I can't see a single star in the sky
it's pitch dark...
is it the light in my room blocking it out,
or is it the absence of you,
the absence of me?

then the nothingness that came,
I hoped it would never end,
but I also longed for it to be over,
for me to feel something,
anything, a single tear would do...
but nothing came.
that tingly feeling when you're finally alone after something has happened and you can process it.
729 · Oct 2023
a pit
Strying Oct 2023
you can't escape your own loneliness
it surrounds you when you walk outside,
around people or alone,
that doesn't particularly matter to you.

you rise, you fall
it doesn't change how you feel inside,
depression doesn't go away no matter how hard you try to get a grip,
it always returns,
no matter how hard you're trying,
the voice in your head is always lying.

don't cry, my dear
it is no use,
and yet tears still flow
and when you stare yourself dead in the eye
pleading yourself to stop
the person in the mirror replies
with a simple shake of the head from left to right
and again, and again
till that same head
falls gently to your hands.

you wipe the tears away,
and look to the sky in the reflection,
but it's empty.
729 · Oct 2022
sparkling
Strying Oct 2022
the way you make me feel
tingles in my shoulders,
curling my toes,
I'm so glad to hear from you
and whenever you want
we can glow.
<3
713 · Oct 2022
exhaustion
Strying Oct 2022
takes on a new meaning
when it isn't from a lack of sleep,
but rather a repeated beating from life.
~draft
710 · Mar 2021
i just wanna die
Strying Mar 2021
I repeated things so many times,
they've become lies,
and I can't breathe thinking about
the number of times I wished I could
just be alright and yelled why?!
Please,
God!
I yell in my head,
why why why
listen to me this once,
I just want to die.
:)
695 · Mar 2019
Have You Ever Felt Like
Strying Mar 2019
Have you ever felt like
all you wanted to do was listen to music
yet your head hurt

and the world would spin and spin
but all you wanted was to stand still

and the sun didn't shine on a day where you wanted to be blinded

And the branch didn't break
when you tried to die from the aches of life
so you had
had to let go.

Have you ever felt like the chocolate is never just right.
Either too milky or too strong, never balanced out.
Have you ever forgot to feed your pet,
remembered, and still layed in bed?

Because I, I,
understand it all
but life just isnt easy like that
for life
doesn't just give you the lemons,
it makes you find them
and work to
make
the lemonade.
*** my head hurts and all these thoughts are spinning through my head, so here's a poem from my random thoughts. Lyrical, ain't it!?
692 · Mar 2019
Escape Key
Strying Mar 2019
For aren't we all lost,
In nothing?
We say "where are we?"
But, who cares?!
We are all insignificant dots,
in a limitless sky of dots.

I would rather spend one day,
A perfect day
in the meadow
and have so much fun
and then continue that for as long as possible.

Money distracts us from happiness.
Goals and guidelines we will never,
ever,
fit
distract us from happiness.

If we all wander
And we are all lost
Why not all be found together?
In a world of happiness and freedom!

Why work when you can rest?
Why run a mile,
when you can smile!
Why take a test
when you can press
the escape key.

It's so easy,
yet none of us click it.
For escaping reality
is seen as "suicidal thoughts" or "depression"
where maybe all we want is to be happy.
To forget about our worries
And not have to feel the nothingness
creeping from inside.
For when we are happy,
all we want is to cherish that moment.
But, what if we never had to let go of it?
We should let go of sadness! Why not be free to be with friends all day every day instead of being stressed about the future, we could enjoy it till the very last day we are on the planet and even then, even if there is nothing after life, we will have lived a happy life filled with goodness and laughter and kindness where no one would be mean because everyone would be happy!
676 · Apr 2021
one slip up
Strying Apr 2021
and I'm gone.
The drop is so strong I can barely breathe,
and yet everything around me keeps moving.

Time doesn't stand still for anyone.
i dont want to turn back time, i just want everything to stop sometimes
636 · May 2022
courage to change
Strying May 2022
connections sparking
inside our brains
two hearts beating
connected through a band
of blood
and love
and fire
and power
and you and me
a couple of torches
in the darkest town
lighting up the worst places
and the worst people
and turning them to dust
to dirt
to diamonds.
<3
629 · Sep 2021
empty
Strying Sep 2021
let me out
of this cage,
I can't escape
a world of pain,
and the drought
from all the tears I
no longer have the
energy to produce.
nightt
599 · Apr 2021
“Life” as we know it
Strying Apr 2021
A country road leads to a home.
Beyond rows of trees,
you find a place to hide,
and yet people always seem to be hiding in a place
where they can be found.
Where can one go to never be discovered?
One may wonder if such a place exists.
If it does, how does one get there?
Is death the only path, or can other ways be made.
Can a person scream and not be heard.

Years may pass, but the only constant
is the endless denial of the end.
There will always be nothing in the end.
Blank.
Then again,
a blank canvas is exactly what so many artists look for,
right?
What many broken people look for to make a new start?
A blank page is a new story waiting to be written,
a life waiting to be lived,
and a masterpiece waiting to be crafted.
Art is a whole other story,
for every stoke creates one piece of something
that has never been made before,
no matter how detailed one can replicate,
each is new,
as each person is a new.

These are all pretty random thoughts;
put together using words,
sentences, paragraphs,
whatever you want to call it.

In reality, everything we know is made by people.
This is because, even things made by God,
were polluted by people.
Who knows if God wanted the sky named “sky.”
In reality, nothing is reality,
it’s all a concept.
And not all of these ideas can be written.
Everything seems dumb down to what we,
who we consider the most advanced species,
can understand.
To me,
it seems many animals can get by with
just knowing that when it is dark they sleep,
and when it is light they get up.

Anyway,
my point is that if,
humans can turn beauty into false concepts,
people are too a false concept.
Who are humans;
some say we are ****-sapiens.
I say we are beings,
all trying to find a purpose in a broken society,
broken by us.

Why is that in an attempt to educate our young,
we stress them out past levels of asylums just a century ago.
I don’t see what the point of creating a world where people are unhappy is.
And then, they don't allow for an escape from it.
Their personal sad and insanity entertainment.
Our only escape is death,
and suicide is looked down upon.
What does society expect us to do?
Talk to other people,
the root cause of the world’s negatives.

When I say it would be easier to die, it’s the truth.
Death is the easy way out,
and yet why does it feel so hard?
I know it's long, I apologize.
599 · Feb 2021
Genius and Madness
Strying Feb 2021
truly
grateful
and
completely
terrified
Thank you guys so much for showing so much love for my last poem and I was just thinking about how so many extremely talented people had bad addictions or lost their minds.
On another note, my palm has a bump on it from writing so much and it scares me, and each time I write I worry that it'll be the last time even though it's not as serious at all (I think).
Thanks again ya'll <3
598 · Jun 12
Wondering
Strying Jun 12
Wandering a world of traps and likes,
sometimes I stare into the abyss of the blue sky,
and the sun illuminating the garden through the birch trees,
and I wonder if this is happiness.

I wonder how many things I will change in my life,
and I wonder if I'll look back one day and think it was happiness.

I wonder if I will wound up regretting it,
regretting changing myself or my life,
regretting changing my path to fit others' expectations,
or are they my own?

What's left after a person wanders,
wanders and wonders?
the uncertainty around what one's future life will look like based on decisions they are making at the moment
591 · Mar 2019
The Cycle Of Home
Strying Mar 2019
You looked at me
I saw your stare
The cold
                uninviting
                                     stressing
stare.
The one that kept me up at night,
shaking from fright.

You said you weren't sorry for what you said last night.
And that you meant it all.
Oh my.
What spite.

A shimmer in my eyes.
That's all it took to change my life forever.

No longer was I your slave.
I didn't follow you around
with my mouth open
drooling.
No more.

I wouldn't...
I couldn't...

That's what we all say,
until we do.
And that's when the scary begins all over again.
When you fall in to the same trap,
Over
         and
                  over
again.
Once the cycle has begun, there is no leaving
from one's stum.
For your stum is your home.
And your home is your cycle.
I wanted to write something sad, but nothing death related. So, this happened! It is one of my greatest fears and something I do sometimes. Recently, my friend and I stopped being friends when he began to bully me. I am afraid to fall in to the trap that is our friendship again, as I have with him before.
574 · Jul 2021
expectations
Strying Jul 2021
I only feel like I'm enough,
when I'm doing things I don't love.
:(
-
©Strying
Strying Aug 2021
my friend tells me
she picked up his call because she was scared
a rather tragic start
to a love story
don't you think?
Strying Mar 2019
I, for one, know I should be up and moving round.
Round
and
round.
And now and then,
I do, what I'm supposed to do.
But now and then, I also dig a hole or two,
so the odds of me doing what I am supposed to do are slim.
My homework's, in my bag.
I am looking, quite sad.
I don't want to do anything,
today.
And every day
goes the same,
so please don't make me do a thang.
Because I, for one, am having oh so much fun.
Just a funny poem about my procrastination!
(also it reminds me of Belle from Beauty and the Beast!)
547 · Aug 2023
unwell
Strying Aug 2023
because sometimes,
when everything is going great,
I still,
inside,
feel empty.
hm
539 · Nov 2020
Emotionless
Strying Nov 2020
You ever just sitting there
Wondering how you are able
to keep it all down

I put it all into a dot
On the wall
I stared and poured it all out

No more emotions
I stare
Thoughts in my head,
but my face blank

And I wonder if I'm the only one
Who has kept so much down
In the face of all whom I love

Who don't love me enough
Sorry just have a lot in my head rn
530 · Feb 2020
Some Days
Strying Feb 2020
Some days I feel like getting up,
others,
I don't.
I lift my finger off my bed, and I say,
not today.

Sometimes I wonder if people notice the small things,
like my eye bags getting bigger,
or the slight limp in my walk.
Maybe they do and maybe they don't,
that's not up to me.
It's all up for grabs.

I like to think I'm in charge,
but I know I'm just drifting.
People around me are just carrying me along through life.
I'll never be the person they all look to.
The "Imma 2020 president candidate," tik tok that people actually support.

No love, no nothing.
Drifting. Drifting. Drifting.
Some days I do my homework,
some days I can't even open my laptop.
It's not up to me, it's all up for grabs.
idk if I really believe that I don't have control, maybe sometimes.
528 · Sep 2021
apocalypse
Strying Sep 2021
sparkles
of dust passing by
no one in sight
a shy smile
alone
goodnight:)
509 · Jan 2021
breathe
Strying Jan 2021
in and out
oxygen
if you can breathe
you can live
if you can breathe
you can fight
so dont stop breathing
because i need you.
haha this sounds like an inspirational talk someone would give to someone during an apocalypse
486 · Nov 2020
Denial
Strying Nov 2020
It always seems that the saddest poems,
get the least likes.

As though no one wants to be affiliated
with you when you're in a position
where you want to die.

Instead of giving you a "like"
they avoid it.

Knowing they relate to it,
they isolate you.

And once you are gone,
they are the ones that will remember you.

And yet that poem will be hidden in the "personal journal" files,
so their secrets are not uncovered.

Their murders never put under trial,
and the perpetrators,
never convicted.

This is a happy state,
and it's called,
DENIAL.
Just some thoughts as how a lot of the saddest poems I've seen on here just get ignored or left at 1 or 2 likes...
479 · Jul 2022
beaches
Strying Jul 2022
brown and blue
born out of the ocean,
love,
and you.
468 · Nov 2020
Lights off
Strying Nov 2020
I smile
I laugh
I joke
The door closes
I scream
I cry
I want
Nothing more
Than to die.
:/ true for a lot of people. Many don't even realize they are sad, they don't see their own fake smiles.
466 · Mar 2019
What If?
Strying Mar 2019
A place
Where I don't need to hide,
A world that shines so bright
I don't wanna close my eyes
or sleep at night.
For the light is my life
and I know this is right
and I feel for the earth to my soul
to the bowl
of milk
that is left
in the cleft
in the middle of her
last
craft
and her last
laugh.
My baby's last
last laugh.
For she slips away
As fast as she came, she left.
One moment my whole life was there.
In the face of a kid who's age not four.
And yet,
I sit.
Wondering.
Dreaming.
What if?
I can't imagine the pain of losing a child.
465 · Nov 2020
sparks die
Strying Nov 2020
I feel so cold.

We were never "together"
But you led me to believe in "us"
We were never "meant to be"
But I thought we had a "spark"

And then I found out the truth.
yeah.
462 · Oct 2020
()_()
Strying Oct 2020
Music blasting,
Skin tingling,
Face frozen,
Eyes cold.
Am I dead yet?
Haven't been so active on HP but I have been writing book ideas so I'm still passionate don't worry :)
Sad little poem, been overwhelmed with homework and tests recently.
450 · Mar 2019
Replacement
Strying Mar 2019
"What you did to me is unheard of. Unspeakable. You are repulsive. Goodbye."
I can't deal with you no more.
You were my best friend.
Called me a b** and h and so, so much more.
At this point,
if you don't know those two words,
then you haven't been in this sort of situation.
He was my best friend.
My best friend.
It's still burned in the back of my mind.

Surprising,
isn't it,
when the person you trust the most
doesn't just bail,
but hurts you.
The person you loved the most
makes you stay up crying in bed.
The person you loved the most
makes you feel afraid of going to school
or unlocking your phone.

At this point,
I have given up.
My real friends are my old friends,
the ones everyone thought I would dump forever.
But, they always lurked in the background
of my life.
They may have been shoved to the side,
but never did they fade.

These are the friends that were by your side
through the hardest times.
Before you meet the one friend you
get crazy close with in one night and
pretend
trust grows on trees,
think about your old friends.
The ones you might be mad at for a stupid,
stupid reason.
Give them a chance.

Don't let the others fade,
just because you found a new "them."

You've replaced them.
But, the replacement will fail to serve.
My bff bullied me and im just glad to have real friends to be surrounded with <3
442 · Sep 2020
The Moment I Knew
Strying Sep 2020
All my friends had given up
They'd taken the easy path
The one where straight A's are attainable
And sanity is sustainable

I moved my mouse in a different direction
From their perplexion, I knew
My complexion would never be the same

I knew that taking these courses
Would be no vacation
The certification was hard to achieve

Yet I got to the point where I wanted no more than to get down on my knees!
Plead guilty
For the crime
Of being in over my head.

I couldn't retain information
My mind was an augmentation
Of my imagination
A collection of mistakes,
Aches,
And earthquakes.

No more could I stand on still ground,
my knees shaking from your sound.
My heart pounding from
the inevitable loss of my innocence
which came derived from your
rejection.

My friends
the ones I held dear, my very own
Turned their face, shielded their eyes.
I was a damnation to everything they stood for!

For everything I tried to become
They became the opposite.
They fought their own, in the worst way possible
And I was left to battle my
impossible alone

Alone with the hours of homework,
And alone to face the very
housework we had built.
To see it crumble down before
my very eyes,
as I fumble to even close the windows to my soul,
as sleep is for the weak,
and I have too many bleak thoughts.
Far too many to ever be able to really dive deep
in this menacing society.

My school which shuts its doors at the very sight of me
And God who rains smog down
and it's not the year 2020, it's the whole future, past, and present.
It's our actions that will never be corrected
For we have had too many opportunities
And pennies for thoughts squandered into oblivion.
For maybe we should stop making
excuses,
and start accepting our fates.
For one day we are all destined to be gone,
yet isn't it odd,
that ignoring this,
that is how we survive?
I really needed to rant in poetry today. Trying to work on my word choice, hope you enjoy this :)
429 · Nov 2020
Angel
Strying Nov 2020
One last breath.
A moment,
Fleeting.
Your face frozen
In my mind
an angel,
fallen from heaven,
and now,
returned.
:c
423 · Aug 2023
grief and loss
Strying Aug 2023
she died,
I couldn't believe it,
and I still don't understand it,
I wasn't given the time to process it,
she died,
and I was surrounded by people,
she died,
and I had to keep smiling,
responding,
existing,
but she died.
</3 sorry to anyone who has to deal with grief alone in a hectic life, you got this. feel free to dm me if you need someone to talk to.
391 · Oct 2020
Falling
Strying Oct 2020
I can't stop
Your words
bring me tingles,
over text,
And butterflies form every time
I get a notification.

Your voice alone brings a smile
to my face, but it'll never work.

I'm just kidding myself thinking
that it'll be better this time.
That this is not the exact same as before.

For he left me alone,
and you're already too far away.
().()
^True^
377 · Oct 2020
Sky
Strying Oct 2020
Sky
Trees swaying side to side,
Blue's all I see.
If only it could stay,
Blue for eternity.
!We should stop polluting!
Anyway, I love looking at the sky and just laying down looking up. Stargazing is nice too :)
375 · Oct 2020
Royalty
Strying Oct 2020
Staring down at my hands,
Quivering at my own sight.
My
      c
         r
           o
             w
               n
fell,
Though it was never really there.
I feel like being royalty isn't always as amazing as it may seem.
362 · Dec 2023
dream of a slow life
Strying Dec 2023
rolling hills
buildings of stone
rainy days
peaceful nights
a dark hallway
leading to a candlelit room
books from ceiling to floor
overlooking the countryside
squared windows
and hands over rough pages
warm blankets
sleep.
imagine having a castle in a field in Europe goals fr
356 · Jul 2021
poem a day
Strying Jul 2021
i've been trying to write a poem a day
as if poetry is a lifeboat
sailing the dark ocean that is my life
~drowning~
356 · Jun 2020
2020
Strying Jun 2020
2020 is not the year.

2020 is full of despair.

On the verge of another world war,

then faced with a pandemic,

like never seen before.

Once again, this year has struck.
Stay strong! Sending my best <3
353 · Oct 2022
abandonment
Strying Oct 2022
and then there was you,
my only savior,
from the plight of my life,
but like everyone else,
you left me too.
:/
341 · Jul 2021
i feel like a failure
Strying Jul 2021
in every meaning of the word
and i think ill fail whatever comes next too.

those around me are constantly telling me
i already have.
my mom told me she thinks imma end up living in the streets :D
when i was a kid she told me she thought i would be a star, like performing and all...
337 · Mar 2019
Memories
Strying Mar 2019
I remember your sweet eyes
your large smile
so good to me
so right
and then you pull me close
in the moonlight at midnight
and I close my eyes for a minute

Light
All I see is light
When I awaken its light
And I'm all alone

A note on the corner of the bed we slept in
I slowly inch toward it
I pick it up
Read the first line
and I throw it to the ground.

Can't take this.
I scream "SHIZZ."
Still can't believe it's all gone,
just like that.
Just like that,
my world ended.
My heart flew and crashed in that moment.

I wasn't ready.
I thought she was cooking surprise breakfast.
But she was
                                           just
                                                                            gone.
This makes me so sad. I hope it never happens to me!
337 · May 15
the van gogh tragedy
Strying May 15
somewhere in the distance, I see myself in the light
what's in the dark, is whether I'm still alive when illuminated.
333 · Aug 2021
mixed signals
Strying Aug 2021
one moment you're asking me to talk
the next ignoring my response
i cant ignore my feelings
but there is no way i can express them
</3
Strying Mar 2020

I asked you a question,
you never replied.
Tell me the truth,
please do not hide.
Your complexion is fine,
when you are not lying inside.
I know that you want me to stay,
but I need you to tell me that,
it will all be okay.

I love you and never want to hurt you,
But I am,
And I can't.
So I need you to tell me that you will move on,
that you will be able to get to school,
and still, have fun.
Please don't cry,
don't whine or look sly.
I love you,
But I must say goodbye.

I need you to tell me,
I need it now,
I can't leave without it,
Please,
tell me to go.
Tell me you don't need me,
And that you will be better off,
this way.

I need you to tell me it's okay for me to go.

Hi, I'm afraid the coronavirus is here and they aren't closing my school. My parents are making me stay home :)
310 · Nov 2020
Hands
Strying Nov 2020
I wrote it on my hands
I etched it to my soul
My happy place
Was taken away
Replaced with
His voice

But you're here
and you touched my hand
and made it all okay.
310 · Mar 2021
:(
Strying Mar 2021
:(
tears in my eyes
it's been an hour
I can barely breathe.

I hear the front door open
I stand and wipe my face 10 times
look in the mirror
give it 3 more wipes.

Fake smile,
bright eyes,
wipe my nose,
I'm ready to go :)
literally my life
305 · Mar 2019
Perfect Person
Strying Mar 2019
You're one of my favorites
A star of my life
Someone I just can't live without

And even when you're far away
I'll never wanna spend a day
not talking with you

Because I never had that perfect person,
that one who never left my side
who was always there when I needed them
and didn't leave me in the dirt to die,
when I was at my worst, they stayed, with their foot planted at my right.

So please, please.
Don't ever, ever leave my side.
Ahh love this so much. So proud of myself on this one for some reason!
295 · Jun 2020
Always Running
Strying Jun 2020
I can't stare at one place for too long.
My eyes start to water as the thoughts,
wander my mind.
My brain is surrounded in darkness and evil,
as soon as I stop for a moment.
Even if it is just to think.
To breathe.
To be.

I can't seem to relax,
always on the run.
Stressing about something
THAT SHOULD BE FUN!
It's holding me back,
but I'm "not diagnosed,"
so I guess it's okay.
I guess I'm okay.

I never go to a therapist,
so I guess that I'm lucky,
I guess that I'm healthy.

My mind isn't empty,
so I guess that is good,
But the clutter comes at me like nails in wood.

I can't seem to stare,
at one place,
at one time.
My mind always running.

No way to
stop
now.
Just some thoughts about how people sometimes don't go to the doctor and say the truth or even have the opportunity to easily open up about their mental health. THIS DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULDN'T CHECK IN WITH SOMEONE. If someone opens up to you and you just say "well you don't have depression/anxiety/bipolar/etc," you could be missing a cry for help. You don't have to assume they are faking an illness. Just listen and be there, and do your best to help. Stop dismissing, start listening.
Strying Jul 2021
i want love
and im scared of love
and im sick of love
and im so tired.

and yet my heart continues to beat,
as if it's aching for another soul to fall in love with it,
and as if it knows it will once beat to the same rhythm as another;
"love, love, love. what is it good for? absolutely nothing."
291 · Apr 2019
Heaven
Strying Apr 2019
I am laying on the ground
staring up at the ceiling,
nothing left to try for.

I lay in this dark room,
for so long,
trying to get the feeling of feeling nothing.
What some consider death,
I consider heaven.

Then I hear footsteps and the door
opens
and the light floods in
and it's my mom
and she yells "clean your room!"
but all I wanna do is
wipe,
wipe,
wipe myself off of the Earth.
But can I say that? No.
So, I just say "I'm tired."
But she doesn't know what that means.
For I am not tired and want to sleep,
like in the sense of fatigue.
no, no-no
I'm tired of living and life.
And the action of walking,
talking,
and moving.

For what you consider
death,
I consider heaven.
*Cries* why do I have to write such sad things
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