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665 · Nov 2021
were's the sequel?
maria Nov 2021
How do I stop loving you?
Are there any instructions?
There should be, isn't it?
I guess
they're in the sequel
that never got published
Written on November 17, 2021
© ,Maria
653 · Feb 2021
night text
maria Feb 2021
You know,
You can answer
your messages
If you care
   -like you said you do-
Or leave me alone
forever
Thanks.
Written on Febuary 14, 2021
© ,Maria
640 · Sep 2019
cereal bowl
maria Sep 2019
In the ***** streets
I saw your face,
In the rough sea
I felt your body,
In the bus stations
I smelled your perfume,
In my cereal
I tasted your tears,
In the loud radios
I heard your absence.

On my pillow
I shouted my goodbyes.

I don't see you anymore.
My cereal bowl is full of your lies.
Trying to get over lies and the loneliness you caused.

Written on September 20, 2019
618 · Jan 2022
no one
maria Jan 2022
there  is         no      one
I  can  argue          with
about       silly     things
no one       to        laugh
while doing the dishes
no        one           to cry
about        the  weather
and the   not      so well
cooked chicken   wings.
There' s         no    o n e
I     have        no       one
January 18, 2022
© ,Maria
615 · Dec 2020
Untitled
maria Dec 2020
Standing strong
I still need
someone to hold
Written on December 17, 2020
© ,Maria
604 · Nov 2019
fine line
maria Nov 2019
we are each others favourites;
no one talks first
no one talks last
but somehow
somewhere in the middle
we find each other;
maybe that's fine
written on November 22, 2019
584 · Dec 2020
warm me
maria Dec 2020
Even if I probably don't need it
I want someone
Not to fake love
Not to fool people
Not to fool me
I just want a hug
No feelings between
written on 17 December, 2020
© ,Maria
578 · Feb 2021
exam season
maria Feb 2021
So much to study
and here I am
writing poems
for you,
instead
14 febuary 2021
© ,Maria
576 · Jan 2021
phone call
maria Jan 2021
you called
out of nowhere
to ask
if I know a song

It's been a month since we last talked
what do you really want?
you're getting me crazy

written on January 17, 2021
© ,Maria
567 · Oct 2019
sorry
maria Oct 2019
Sorry for the sadness
I'm not trying to
it's just life,
you know,
everyone's playing hide and seek
Some people need answers you don't really have or are too clear, they just don't want to hear

Written on October 20, 2019
558 · Jul 2020
do you miss me?
maria Jul 2020
well
I met someone
he's nice to me;
you never treat me nice
what's there to miss?

written on July 03, 2020
© ,Maria
557 · Nov 2019
pointless studies
maria Nov 2019
all this study
for something I never loved
            -in a world full of judge-
for an exam I'll never pass
and even if I did,
life wouldn't care a bit
counting hours before an exam I don't really care about but have to pass if I want to get my degree one day.

Written on November 20, 2019
529 · Sep 2019
last minute
maria Sep 2019
I have to go again.
Are you afraid?

I'm leaving the country,
the sympathy
and the fake dreams.
Do you care?

I pack everything
but I'm sure something's missing.
What are you running from?

I check myself in the mirror.
It's the last minute before I go.

Nothing changes.
I'm so afraid
oh, I don't care.

I'm running from my questions
but I guess I'm missing my soul.
Quote of the poem:
《I'm running from my questions but I guess I'm missing my soul》

Written on September 9, 2019
521 · Sep 2020
life /the game
maria Sep 2020
Instructions
N.1: get used to dictatory
N.2: if everything looks to be good something's wrong get a crisis card
N.3: pawns of criticism are the strong enough
N.4: paths leading to heaven are closed -if you try to find the key you just realise that there's no hope-
N.5: levels are getting sillier -don't even try to show you're smart-
N.6: put a post of your score on instagram
N.7: be fake -they somehow love you-
N.8: wear a mask

_

if you chose to continue
It's on your own risk
the good has left the chat
no one really wins
In a fake world
Try your best
Don't get sad if it doesn't work

Written on September 15, 2020
© ,Maria
514 · Jan 2022
3a.m
maria Jan 2022
All this sadness
and no one to
share it
yours, marie
Written on January 18, 2022
© ,Maria
509 · Jan 2020
Heart game
maria Jan 2020
He told me once
he doesn't like short hair
I cut my hair short

Still losing the heart breaking game tho
trying to move on
and change things
still hurts you
in the beginning

Written on January 22, 2020
© ,Maria
502 · Aug 2019
blur
maria Aug 2019
just another night
my sky is a blur,
all a mess,
can't figure why,
   or maybe I know,
I don't want to know.
just another night
I can't see clear anymore.
I don't even understand those feelings.
Written on August 30, 2019
499 · Sep 2021
note
maria Sep 2021
no feelings
      no pain
464 · Dec 2019
quarter of a second
maria Dec 2019
Saw you with her
I stared for a moment
-it was just a quarter of a second
don't get yourself confused-
Smile on my face
I looked away
I'm happy without you
I'm happy without you
even if a tiny part of me still has a part of you

written on December 20, 2019
© ,Maria
457 · Jan 2022
"that foolish girl"
maria Jan 2022
give me reasons
to not sound like
         a fool
for              
loving you
Written on January 21, 2022
© ,Maria
457 · Feb 2021
poetic impasse
maria Feb 2021
I feel like I want to write something new
but I can't write anything
that's not about you
written on Febuary 2021
© ,Maria
455 · Jan 2021
She/ present
maria Jan 2021
She won't go
never
She lives
through your eyes
even now
that they lost there beautiful colour
Even now,
She lives through them
written on January 10, 2021
© ,Maria
451 · Nov 2019
No
maria Nov 2019
No
If I forget that you existed
would you leave my thoughts?
Probably, no.

Do you want me to suffer?
No, nor that I care.

Do you want me to remember?
No.

Oh,
sorry to bother you
I'll go.
Hard to fight the questions in my head.

Written on November 07, 2019
447 · Dec 2019
lover
maria Dec 2019
I don't want you to see my burning face.
I've trust it before
in someone's hands
but he was the one
who used the only lighter in the space.

There are no lighters with you.
Hope there is no other space.
I don't want you to see my broken past
and I'm scared to trust but everything looks safe, should I trust?
433 · Jun 2020
20
maria Jun 2020
20
let me tell you what 20 feels like;
I don't know
just like 19
scared
and lost
only a year older
I don't know why we celebrate birthdays

written on June 30, 2020
© ,Maria
433 · Feb 2022
all the reasons
maria Feb 2022
all I really wanted
was a metaphor to die for
and you gave me
all the reasons
Written on Febuary 07, 2022
© ,Maria
430 · Jun 2020
closure
maria Jun 2020
you
played me
I
was a fool
end of story
wish I never met you

written on June 24, 2020
© ,Maria
421 · Dec 2020
Day 179, feelings for you:
maria Dec 2020
craving but not craving
you make me confused
© ,Maria
written on 17 December, 2020
414 · Aug 2019
a bunch of before
maria Aug 2019
I've met you before
and then you changed direction

I've loved you before
and then you changed your hair

I've lost you before
and you didn't care

I've missed you before
and then you found another pair

I've left you before
you're forever shocked

I'm alive
Evey before is followed by an after. Letting you go was the best 'after' of my life.

Written on August 31, 2019
404 · Jan 2022
Silence
maria Jan 2022
the end that never begins
in a love
that doesn't exist
Written on January 5, 2022
© ,Maria
400 · Jun 2022
Fairy garden in my chest
maria Jun 2022
Butterflys in my chest
I walk around
I'm so scared
What if I lose one?
What if they take us apart miles away?
I put them in a cave
that's not the case
What if you grow flowers
to keep them awake?
my love metaphor
7/6/22
© , Maria Xinari
390 · Aug 2022
la catastrophe
maria Aug 2022
Mon coeur,
I can't live without you
I can't live when I'm with you
I can't breath
I can't speak
I'm turning French
to prettify the lie that we live.
             Notre vie,
             une grande catastrophe.
Written on August 26, 2022
© , Maria Xinari
386 · Dec 2020
bittersweet christmas
maria Dec 2020
Being in love with someone
who's in love with someone else
and it's Christmas
...
the best time of the year
nightmare looks alike

written on December 25, 2020
© ,Maria
383 · Dec 2019
Calling for my forgiveness
maria Dec 2019
I want to see you,
but you're nowhere to find.
I wan't to see us.
There's not an us.
And I,
I'm dancing with the shadows,
shameless;
I'm calling myself for forgiveness,
doors closed.
I don't even see me,
anymore.
If you don't forgive yourself and instead chose to shut the doors to your feelings how will anyone else get to see you truly?


Written on November 28
379 · Mar 2020
corona
maria Mar 2020
it's killing me
inside
and out
but
makes me
strong
somehow

virus
in the town
me & you
cuddle
in the house
Stay in but stay calm.;)

written on March 14, 2020
© ,Maria
373 · Jun 2019
Unachieved goals
maria Jun 2019
You ask me what are my goals.
What I'm I supposed to tell you?
That I don't have any goals?
That I have no idea what I'm going to do with my life?
That I'm so confused?
Why is that?
Maybe I'm just focused on survival.
Maybe because the dreams I once had, proved to be fake, proved to be silly.
written on August 31, 2017
370 · Feb 2020
as usual
maria Feb 2020
We're in a cafe
drinking coffee.
I'm loving your voice
listening to your lies

what a routine our lives
tied to what's not right
as usual
we forget to love ourselves
by being with people who really don't define us


written on Febuary 07, 2020
© ,Maria
364 · Aug 2022
shades of the one I love
maria Aug 2022
you're fullest than the ocean
and brighter than the stars
but as you get stubborn
you're so more blurred than fog
Written on August 11, 2022
© , Maria Xinari
maria Nov 2019
Μπλέ του πλοιου, μπλέ του αεροπλάνου
Και τα δύο θάνατος
Και τα δύο ταξίδι
Και στα δύο πνιγμός
Σπαραχτικός λιγμός
Τελευταία ανάσα
Τελευταία σταγόνα ουρανού
Ατέρμοτο γαλάζιο
Νερό και αέρας
Στοιχεία ατέριαστα
Στοιχεία τελευταίου ασπασμού.
Thoughts of travelling in Greece

Written on June 20, 2019
362 · Jan 2020
kindergarten
maria Jan 2020
If you're going to leave me like everyone else
don't come at all
I'm done with the kindergarten
a long time ago.
Some people never grow up and some kids are more honest and respectful than adults, mainly in love.

Written in January 06, 2020
© ,Maria
352 · Oct 2019
Walking tragedy
maria Oct 2019
Can't find happiness;
I looked for her in the empty roads
Asking strangers was kind of difficult
and frustrating
I shouted her name a thousand of times
She kept her eyes down
She put her hands in her ears
She doesn't want to hear
nor visit
nor live anywhere near
I don't blame her
She has other things to do
Walking tragedy isn't one of her favorite
Happiness where are you?

Written on October 07, 2019
346 · Jun 2019
Who are you anyway?
maria Jun 2019
Remember my name,
you said,
and the way you left
a rock festival in my soft skin.

The once bright sky
now full of dust and cries,
burning stars
all over my bed sheets,
who are you anyway?

Keep me close,
you wish,
no one ever fool me
like this.

Ocean colours
in my eyes,
chasing something
that never was mine.

Oh please,
you're just another blurred wasted drink
in my fancy night.
written on June 8, 2019
346 · Jul 2020
midnight questions
maria Jul 2020
Are you sourounded by your dreams or your nightmares?
Written on June 17, 2020
© ,Maria
343 · Sep 2020
rythme
maria Sep 2020
let me be
   let
       me-

_stop the bit
      I'm out of breath
written on September 15, 2020
© ,Maria
341 · Nov 2019
14
maria Nov 2019
14
my life ended in the age of 14
since then nothing changed
still the same broken heart
the same grey clouds
As soon as I read my old notebook of thoughts, I realised that I'm the same person as I was 5 years ago

my most honest poem

Written on November 26, 2019
337 · Mar 2020
no sleep
maria Mar 2020
my thoughts
crazy bees
in a kingdom
out of
honey
giving
bitter aftertaste
to my
dreams
just a night trying
-maybe not enough-
to sleep

written on March 09, 2020
© ,Maria
332 · Dec 2019
euphoria
maria Dec 2019
100 feelings
3 months later
1 place
Home
I'm coming homeeee

December 13, 2019
332 · Jan 2021
To my first love 3.0
maria Jan 2021
I'm happy that
you're happy
without me
no fakeness in it

Written on December 17, 2020
© ,Maria
332 · Sep 2019
you and me, we
maria Sep 2019
hey,
you
and
me
today
or
tomorrow
someday
or
never,
forever
a
We
Someday in a universe

Written on September 11, 2019
329 · Oct 2019
empty
maria Oct 2019
bottles,
roads
but
mostly,
people
empty feelings didn't make it to the list but they could.

Written on October 20, 2019
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